Chapter 5

five

A fter a quick email to his supervisor explaining that he was not feeling well and wouldn’t be able to finish his shift, Ozzie locked his front door and led Tuesday outside. He let Tuesday borrow another pair of pants and a jacket, though the pants were so loose they threatened to drop right off Tuesday’s slim hips.

He tried not to stare too hard.

Ozzie walked Tuesday out to his car, a blue 1970 Volkswagen Beetle. “Hop in.”

Tuesday stared. “Whoa. This is really cute. Like, I can’t believe you own so many synthetic fabrics and have such a cute ride!”

“Yeah? You like it?” Ozzie beamed.

“Love it!” Tuesday slid into the passenger seat.

Ozzie grinned as he got in behind the wheel. He patted the dash lovingly, saying, “This is my pride and joy.”

“It’s adorable!” Tuesday leaned in to smooch Ozzie’s cheek. “Just like you when you come down my throat.”

Ozzie’s cheeks burst into flames and he nearly choked on his own spit. “I, uh... Let’s just go. Oh my God.” He cranked the car quickly. “What kinda clothes do you wanna shop for?”

“Well, obviously everything,” Tuesday replied. “Unless you want me to keep chopping up your clothes?—”

“No. Please, no.”

“Aw, there it is!”

“What?” Ozzie frowned, focusing on backing out of his driveway.

“You’re making that cute little face! It’s the same as when you come!” Tuesday laughed. “Your brow gets this little wrinkle like you’re really concentrating, and you get really red, like a really pretty shade of red.”

“Stop. Oh my God, you can’t just talk like that.” Ozzie’s cock twitched in his jeans, and he stared ahead at the road.

This was fine.

It wasn’t like he could perfectly imagine what Tuesday looked like with those pouty, soft lips wrapped around his cock…

Except he could.

Fuck.

“If we’re going out in public, you have to behave,” Ozzie said firmly. “No more sexy talk.”

“Sheesh, sorry!” Tuesday pouted, extending a third arm to reach out and squeeze Ozzie’s knee. “I am trying to behave! I mean, I could have said I’m super addicted to the taste of your semen and my dick gets wet just thinking about tasting you.”

Ozzie squeezed the steering wheel, hitting the brakes as they approached a stop sign. He took a deep breath and turned to glare at Tuesday through his lashes, grumbling, “You’re killing me. Right now. You’re killing me.”

“Literally, or just sexually?” Tuesday grinned. “Because hey, you gotta be alive to achieve orgasm.”

“You’re impossible.” Ozzie shook his head in annoyance, but he couldn’t fight back the grin taking over his face. “Let’s just go find you some clothes. I’m running out of T-shirts, and I can’t pull off a crop top like you.”

“What? You can pull off anything you want.”

“Well, thank you, but?—”

“And then I’ll pull it off you. With my teeth.”

“Goddammit. You’re gonna be trouble. I can tell already.”

“Me? Never.”

Ozzie simply rolled his eyes and drove into town, surprisingly relaxed considering he had a literal alien from outer space riding with him.

As long as Tuesday kept his tentacles and extra arms and whatever else to himself, everything should be fine.

Just fine.

Downtown was decked out for the holidays, and with a fresh blanket of snow covering everything it looked like a holiday postcard. Green wreaths with red ribbon hung off the lampposts, colorful lights lined nearly every window, and illuminated garlands were strung across the streets to create a festive canopy overhead.

The streets were crowded, and the sidewalks were bustling with people no doubt finishing up last minute shopping, and Ozzie grabbed the first parking space he could.

“Okay!” Ozzie turned the car off. “We’ve got a few options here. There are two secondhand stores. One specializes in fancy vintage crap. There’s a costume shop, and then just your basic clothing store. Kinda like Target kinda stuff. If you know what a Target is. Anyway. Where do you want to start?”

Tuesday glued himself to the window. “Oh, fancy vintage crap. That is so up my alley. Let’s go there!”

“Fancy vintage it is.” Ozzie nodded and slid out of the car, the door squeaking as he closed it. “Come on, this way.”

Tuesday eagerly hopped up to follow him, and he stuck right to Ozzie’s side and grabbed his hand.

Ozzie smiled as their fingers laced together. He’d been a little worried about Tuesday making a scene or whipping his pink tentacles around, but this was surprisingly tame.

And yeah, holding hands made his heart race a little faster.

Hadn’t been expecting that.

When they reached the window with Time After Time painted in gold, Ozzie stepped up to open the door. He waved for Tuesday to go in first. “This is it.”

Tuesday eagerly darted inside and he gasped, his eyes wide as he stared at the colorful, eclectic selection of clothing.

There were crazy patterns, fuzzy fabrics, and sequins everywhere.

“Holy shit!” Tuesday actually squeaked in delight, and he raced forward to the nearest rack to paw through the clothing. “This place is awesome. Look at this! Wow, look at this ! What even is this? I love it!”

As much as Ozzie despised shopping, it was hard not to get caught up in how excited Tuesday was. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad with company. He grabbed a basket and hurried to keep up with Tuesday’s insanely long legs. “I’ve never seen so many eye-assaulting colors in one place.”

“Right? Isn’t it amazing?” Tuesday immediately pulled a loud floral shirt from the rack followed by a hot-pink tube top, a black leather vest, and a turquoise sequined blazer with huge shoulder pads. “I need these. All of these. Please and thank you.”

Ozzie offered out the basket for Tuesday to drop his items in, chuckling to himself. Everything Tuesday grabbed was as wild as Ozzie had imagined, and he had no doubt that Tuesday could still make it look good.

“Oh!” Tuesday waved a bedazzled nightmare covered in little reindeer. “What about this one?”

“Hey, that would be perfect for my company party.” Ozzie laughed. “We’d be quite a pair with the stuff Derrick is letting me borrow.”

“Let’s do it!” Tuesday cheered and continued searching for more colorful clothing. He was so excited that an extra arm popped out of his stomach to help shift through the hangers.

Ozzie grimaced and crowded closer, not wanting anyone else to spy the extra limb. “We should get you a warm jacket too. Most of these clothes don’t look very good for the snow.”

“Oh. Right.” Tuesday grinned, turning to kiss Ozzie. “Mmm, that’s so thoughtful of you, baby. Wanna make sure I’m all cozy and warm?”

Ozzie blushed lightly at the kiss, certainly not used to public displays. His heart pounded, and his stomach fluttered in the most pleasant way. “I don’t want you freezing.” He grinned playfully against Tuesday’s soft lips. “I can think of a few ways to keep you warm.”

“Oh really?” Tuesday forgot all about the clothing, and one of his tentacles slithered out to curl around Ozzie’s waist. “You know, I’m actually starting to feel a little chilly right now.”

“I didn’t really, uh—” Ozzie’s face flushed hotter, and he gulped. “I’m not sure I can warm you up here in the store, you know?” He glanced around to make sure they weren’t attracting too much attention. “We’re supposed to be shopping for clothes, not taking clothes off.”

“Oh. Well. Later then!” Tuesday smooched him one more time and then dove back into the clothing with a little giggle.

“Later,” Ozzie agreed with a grin. “Yeah.”

Knowing there was going to be a later filled Ozzie’s chest with a new warmth, and despite his reservations about how the shopping would go, he had a great time. Tuesday ransacked every inch of the store for only the tackiest apparel from neon green boots to glittery ballet slippers and anything fuzzy.

Despite his earlier reservations, Ozzie had a great time. After checking out, Ozzie steered them to a small coffee shop for a caffeine fix. Tuesday kept his arms limited to two, but he did hold Ozzie’s hand and pepper his hair with kisses while they waited to order. Tuesday was effortlessly charismatic and chatted up the cashier, so Ozzie didn’t even have to talk to them. He’d done the same thing back at the thrift store, and it was nice having a barrier for peopling.

What would have drained Ozzie only seemed to invigorate Tuesday, and he appeared to be having a great time chatting with complete strangers.

Even while he was listening to the cashier tell them about her three poodles and their latest haircuts, Tuesday kept his hand on Ozzie at all times.

It was nice.

Having that physical connection was a lifeline in what would otherwise be a particularly anxious situation. Ozzie was used to being left on the sidelines of conversations, usually a move he made by choice to get away from them as quickly as possible. Sometimes it happened because he didn’t know what to say and got pushed out or talked over.

Tuesday’s touch was a reminder that Ozzie was still being included, even if he didn’t want to actively participate.

Yeah, it was really nice.

Once they had their sugary iced coffees, they loaded the bags into the Beetle and then headed for home. This was the most time Ozzie had spent outside his house in a good while but as much fun as he’d had, he was ready to be home.

He needed comfy clothes and a comfy couch, stat.

As soon as they walked in, Ozzie headed to the kitchen to drop off the bags on the table and decided that changing his clothing could wait. He stumbled over to collapse on the couch with a groan. “That was great. A total blast. Time to chill now.” He patted the cushion beside him. “Come sit.”

“Okay, chill, yes. But first, I am changing clothes, thank you.” Tuesday chuckled. “Be right back, baby.” He grabbed one of the bags and hurried off, tentacles waving behind him as he ran.

“Okay!” Ozzie watched him bounce away before he picked up the remote. He was thoroughly peopled out, and all he wanted was to chill, smoke, and cuddle with Tuesday.

Huh.

That was new.

Even as tired as he was from the drag of human interaction, he still wanted to be close to Tuesday.

He smiled softly as he flipped through the movies he owned trying to find something to watch, and paused on The Fellowship of The Ring .

“Hey, Tuesday?” he called out. “Have you ever watched Lord of The Rings ?”

“Huh?” Tuesday shouted back. “What’s that?”

“It’s only like the best movie series ever!” Ozzie gushed. “Do you like adventure and fantasy movies?”

“Uh, yes and yes?”

“Fuck yeah!” Ozzie bolted up, suddenly energized with the prospect of sharing his favorite franchise. He practically skipped into the kitchen to get his bong and pack the bowl so they could enjoy the full cinematic experience.

Tuesday popped in wearing the hot-pink tube top, fuzzy leopard-print pants, and a black fur wrap draped around his shoulders. He posed against the doorway, grinning. “Is this appropriate adventure and fantasy film viewing attire?”

Ozzie looked up and immediately barked out a delighted laugh. “You look amazing. Ready for the runway.”

Tuesday spun, laughing as he strutted over to smooch Ozzie’s cheek. “Thank you, baby. I will find a way to pay you back in filthy sexual favors.”

“You don’t have to pay me back for anything.” Ozzie smiled like a dope at the smooch, curling an arm around Tuesday’s slender waist. “How about we get high and watch a movie?”

“I would love to get high and watch a movie with you, baby.” Tuesday smiled, pressing against Ozzie’s chest. “Oh, and we should order snacks. We need more snacks. We should have grabbed more snacks.”

“We can order any snacks you want, babe.” Ozzie hugged Tuesday close, looking up at him to ask, “Do you have favorite snacks? I’ve never even asked!”

“I like sour stuff. The more sour, the better. And oh! Gummy things. Like, fruity and chewy things?” Tuesday grinned. “Got anything like that?”

“Uh, no. I’m more into the sweet than the sour.” Ozzie snorted, leading Tuesday back toward the couch. “We can order all that though. It can be here pretty quickly if we use DoorDash or something like that.”

“That’s who I’m supposed to work for, right?” Tuesday plopped onto the couch, waiting for Ozzie to sit so he could snuggle up against him.

“Yeah. Basically, they drive around and deliver food. You order on this app.” Ozzie grabbed his phone and opened up the app. “For candy and stuff, we can just have someone pick it up from a gas station or something.” He added sour gummy worms and other candies to the cart, throwing in some potato chips for himself. “What do you like to drink?”

“Fluids,” Tuesday purred. “Tasty, thick... fluids .”

“Fuckin’ hell.” Ozzie’s face heated up for the millionth time, and he could barely keep himself from falling off the couch. “I’m not… not going to even respond to that.”

“Any kind of soda is fine.” Tuesday giggled.

“Soda it is.” Still not sure what flavors Tuesday was going to like and a little afraid of the answer should he ask, Ozzie grabbed a variety.

“So.” Tuesday gestured to the TV. “What’s this movie about?”

“So, short version, there’s a powerful ring that needs to be destroyed to save the world, and a group of hobbits, humans, and elves go on a wild adventure to do that. With the help of a badass wizard.”

Tuesday’s expression softened, and his voice was quiet as he asked, “Do they… Do they win? The good guys, I mean.”

“Well, I don’t wanna spoil the whole trilogy.” Ozzie chuckled. “Wanna try it?”

Tuesday frowned, and he clung to Ozzie’s arm, several tentacles hugging him tight. “Okay, but… Just tell me it has a happy ending.”

“It has a happy ending,” Ozzie promised, leaning in to kiss Tuesday’s cheek sweetly. “It’s got a really fucking great ending, honestly. Makes me cry every time to be honest.”

“Okay. So. We’re gonna need tissues, huh?” Tuesday grinned.

“Probably, yes. But we have a minute until the first good cry.” Ozzie set his phone on the coffee table and leaned back, wrapping his arm around Tuesday’s shoulders. “Snacks have been ordered. Eating feelings is also a necessity.”

“Yes. Yes, it is.” Tuesday melted against Ozzie’s side, literally. He turned partially into tentacles and glittery goo, snuggling in close.

Ozzie laughed softly at the glittering, gooey mess curling around him. “Let’s do it.” He hit play on the remote to start the movie, and the familiar music made his heart warm and fluttery. “Do you want a blanket?”

“I am the blanket.” Tuesday grinned, his lower half continuing to melt over Ozzie’s lap.

“Oh! Ha! You kinda are.” Ozzie settled a hand against the most solid part of Tuesday’s body he could find. “You are really warm. Does it feel good to be gooey?”

“Mmhmm.” Tuesday smiled. “I mean, it’s me. It’s my body, you know?”

“Yeah. I mean, I don’t always love my body, but it’s the one I got.” Ozzie shrugged, his gaze flicking between the screen and Tuesday’s face as the movie began.

“Don’t worry. I’ll love your body enough for the both of us.” Tuesday kissed his cheek. “Now. What the fuck is going on in this movie?”

“Sorry, I’ll stop talking.” Ozzie grinned sheepishly, turning his attention to the screen. “This is a big party for Bilbo’s birthday. Bilbo Baggins.”

It didn’t take long for Tuesday to get sucked into the movie, totally enraptured as Gandalf and the hobbits set off on their adventure. The group had reached The Prancing Pony, met up with Strider, and were being hunted by Ringwraiths when a loud knock at the door made Ozzie jump right out of his skin.

He yelped, “Son of a bitch!”

“Fuck ass!” Tuesday jumped too, tentacles flailing. “If that’s a wraith, I am punching the shit out of it!”

“Not before I do.” Ozzie cackled, and the frantic twitch of Tuesday’s tentacles only made him laugh harder. “Will you pause it? I think it’s just the food.”

“Pausing!” Tuesday grabbed the remote.

Ozzie untangled himself from the gooey tentacles so he could stand up from the couch and hurry to the front door. He peeked through the window to make sure it was DoorDash and then opened the door. “Hey there! Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

The delivery man offered out a few paper bags. “Here you go, sir! Have a great day!”

“You too!” Bumping the door closed with his hip, Ozzie locked up and then headed back to the couch. “Snacks have arrived!”

“Oh yay!” Tuesday reached out two tentacles to snatch one of the bags with an eager squeal.

Ozzie flopped down beside him, setting the remaining bag down onto the table to dig through. “What soda do you want first?” He put a Mountain Dew, a Fanta, a Coke and a root beer all out for him to choose from.

“Ooo, I like the color of this one.” Tuesday went for the Mountain Dew.

“Careful.” Ozzie grabbed the Coke and twisted the lid off. “That one’s like crack level caffeine and radioactive material.”

“That sounds delicious.” Tuesday grinned as he opened the soda. “Okay, but real talk. I have questions.”

Ozzie chuckled. “I might have answers.”

“Okay. So. How the fuck did Gandalf not recognize the ring Bilbo had as the one true ring thingie? How?”

“Oh, he totally did. He showed him the symbols after he put it in the fire. He definitely knew it was a ring of power. That’s why he wants it to get to the elves.”

“No, no, I mean before!” Tuesday waved his hands. “Didn’t he see the ring back when Bilbo first got it?”

“Oh! Bilbo kinda kept it on the downlow. They go over that more in The Hobbit , but he didn’t want to give it up. So he hid it.” Ozzie dumped the bag of snacks out on the table and loaded up a fresh bowl to smoke.

“Wait, so there’s another movie?”

“There’s a few.” Ozzie chuckled.

Tuesday took a small sip of his Mountain Dew. “Oh, that is good .”

“It is pretty tasty. I usually get in a mood and drink nothing but Dew for like a month and then I’m good for a while.”

Tuesday drank the entire bottle, licked his lips, and burped. “Damn.”

“Holy shit. Guess I should have ordered a twelve pack,” Ozzie teased. “You know I can get some more.”

“It’s fine!” Tuesday giggled, reaching for the Fanta. “Ooo, this one looks tasty too.”

Ozzie unpacked the rest of the snacks and lined them up across the table. He waved at the buffet, saying, “Dinner is served.”

“Thank you, baby.” Tuesday smiled softly. “You know, I’m having a really great time.”

“Me too.” Ozzie smiled, his heart pounding as he leaned in to kiss Tuesday’s cheek. He turned his attention back to the screen and snagged a bag of chips. “Ready to unpause?”

“Ready!” Tuesday declared. “Unpausing now!”

They snuggled up and were transported to Middle Earth for the next few hours. Ozzie found that he enjoyed watching Tuesday experience the movie for the first time more than he actually enjoyed the movie. Everything was new to Tuesday’s eyes, and Ozzie was surprised at how much he wanted him to like it.

They paused for snack breaks and bathroom breaks and smoke breaks and more snack breaks, but Tuesday remained completely entranced whenever the movie was on. He had tons of questions, most of which Ozzie could answer off the top of his head. They laughed, they cheered, and as anticipated, there were several emotional scenes.

Ozzie didn’t think J.R.R. Tolkien could ever have predicted that movies would be made from his books and that one day those films would touch the heart of an adorable tentacled alien.

An alien who Ozzie was becoming very, very fond of.

As the credits finally rolled, Ozzie wiped at the tears still streaking his cheeks from Boromir’s death. “Well, that’s part one.”

Tuesday stared at Ozzie, his eyes filled with glittery tears as he sniffed, “S-so, there’s a part two…?”

“And a part three.”

“What about The Hobbit ? Doesn’t that make four?”

“Technically, it’s six because they split that one up into three movies.”

Tuesday stared expectantly.

“What?”

“Well, what are you waiting for? Put the next one on!”

Ozzie let out a dreamy sigh as he grabbed the remote. “Fuck, you’re perfect.”

“Oh, I know.” Tuesday giggled, catching Ozzie’s cheek to kiss him. “But you know what?”

“What?”

“So are you.”