CHAPTER 18

jamie

S omething shifted after that day at the café when Mateo opened up to me. I suspected it was down to him finally coming out to Dante but a part of me hoped I could take a little credit for it too. But Mateo was definitely different, like the lifting of some heavy weight from off his shoulders. It was apparent in his energies, his confidence and the way he held himself. He seemed freer and less inhibited than he'd ever been before.

He didn't need anything more weighing down those shoulders, those very sexy, very sensual shoulders, the same ones I had held in my arms an increasing number of nights since.

But I still didn't know where things were going between us. Despite everything else, Mateo still held himself back from me, almost like he was afraid of letting himself get too close to me. I was keenly aware he hadn't mentioned Nick's name in a while but I still didn't think he was over him. Not when I saw the way Mateo still looked at Nick those times I'd stay the night at his house.

Which was proving to be a little problematic for me because I knew I was in very real danger of having feelings for Mateo that he could not return. I was already too far past the point of walking away from him. I hadn't been able to do it after one night with him let alone the weeks I'd spent with him since.

I was falling and I had a feeling the bottom was not going to be pretty. Least of all for me.

Right now I was just enjoying those smiles of his that were increasing in both frequency and vibrancy, at least while they were directed my way. I was pretty sure we were becoming Cat's Cradle's number one customers what with how often we seemed to meet up there for a coffee. We weren't any closer to meeting anywhere in Mateo's hometown but I knew I would have to be patient with him about that. I realised now how much he had at stake with his parents.

I also knew he owed me a date but I hadn't been able to bring it up with him. The timing had never felt right so I hadn't mentioned it yet. But I would. Eventually.

"So, Dante and Giulia have been bugging me to see if you would come over for dinner with them," Mateo was saying. I heard the words but I had been a little distracted by the way the sun was slanting across his face, highlighting his angular cheekbones and those plump lips I had last tasted two nights ago. The lips I wanted to taste again right now.

"And you absolutely do not have to come if you don't want to," he was continuing. "But I promised them I'd ask."

"Sorry, ask me what?" I said, shaking my head to dislodge my wandering thoughts.

"Whether you'd come to Dante and Giulia's for dinner," Mateo repeated a little exasperatedly.

"Sorry, my head was in the clouds," I replied, ducking my head guiltily. "Dante and Giulia want me to come over for dinner? Why?"

Mateo rolled his eyes at me and I gathered I had missed that part too. "Officially it's to thank you for saving Dante's life."

"Ah," I said, sinking back in the booth with a smile. "And unofficially?"

"I think it's a matchmaking ploy," he replied with a nervous laugh.

"Hmm," I mulled. "And remind me, will you be there at this matchmaking dinner?"

"Were you not listening to a word I said?" he huffed.

"Honestly, Mateo, if you knew where my thoughts had gone you probably wouldn't be laughing either," I chuffed back but his eyes darkened imperceptibly so I gathered he got my drift.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked, leaning forward in his seat and lowering his voice.

"Mostly about those lips of yours. How sweet they taste. How good they feel wrapped around my –"

"Okay, okay," he huffed, eyes whipping around the mostly empty café.

"You asked," I shrugged.

"I guess I did," he agreed, a small grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. "So?"

"Let me ask you a question, Mateo," I returned, suddenly serious. "Do you want me to come for dinner with the people you think of as your family?"

He paused, a faint flush crossing those cheekbones I had just been admiring as he glanced down at the table, suddenly distracted by the serviette in front of him.

"Yeah," he replied in a way that was less than convincing.

"You don't seem all that enthused by the idea," I returned, trying to keep the hurt in my voice to a minimum.

"I'm not opposed to the idea," he said, eyes rising to meet mine. "I'm just … nervous. I've never done anything like that before and I'm …"

"It's okay, I get it," I said, wishing I could reach out and hold that hand that was now twisting the serviette. "I would love to meet Dante and Giulia, properly at least and I will come for dinner if that is truly what you want. It's your call."

He nodded, nerves crossing his face before he sucked in a deep breath. "I want you there," he said, quietly but confidently. That was enough for me.

"Okay then," I agreed, unable to stop the grin from spreading across my face. Looked like it was time to meet the family, the unofficial one at least but the one I knew who mattered most.

I was feeling an unexpected burst of nerves in my stomach when I knocked on that baby pink front door later that week. It was Friday night and we were on our way to Dante and Giulia's for dinner. I hadn't met Mateo's parents yet, something that seemed fairly unlikely for the time being at least, but tonight felt like I was meeting the ones whose opinions counted.

Which helped explain on one hand why I was nervous but not on the other because I was good at this stuff. I'd met the parents of other boyfriends in the past and had no issues being my usual charming, friendly self. Parents loved me. Mateo wasn't even my boyfriend and yet a veritable swarm of butterflies were having an absolute field day in my gut.

My state of nervous energy wasn't helped by the sudden arrival of Mateo on the other side of the door as I felt all the oxygen leave my body.

Fuck me . How was any human being this bloody perfect? And what was he doing with me ? He left me utterly tongue tied as he stood there, ashy hair with its blonde tips perfectly in place, dark inky eyes getting darker by the minute as my eyes swept down his incredible body. He was in a pair of very snug black jeans that highlighted his figure and had me fearing for my sanity when I glimpsed the even more tempting view of his ass from behind. He had on a low cut v-neck top in white that showed off his olive skin, perfectly complimented by that gold chain around his neck.

"What?" he asked when it became apparent that words and I had suddenly parted company.

"Just wondering what good deeds I did in a past life to get to take you out tonight," I stumbled out. Mateo's eyes lit up at my words, a soft smile tugging at those lips I was suddenly desperate to taste. But I knew his rules so I held myself back even though my body had lit up like a bonfire.

"You don't look too bad yourself," he returned, eyes skating down my body and stoking those flames even higher.

"Are you sure we need to go out tonight?" I all but whimpered. "I think I'd rather shut you in your room and do all manner of unholy things to you."

"Keep talking like that and I'm pretty sure you'll be getting lucky later tonight," he grinned.

"It's not really fair you know," I huffed as we walked towards my parked car and I opened his door for him.

"What's not fair?" he asked, stopping at the door, those pouty pink lips just inches from mine.

"Going to meet ‘the family' with you looking like that," I groaned. "I'm trying to make a good impression but all I'll be doing is drooling over you all night."

"Aw, you want to impress my aunty and uncle?" he cooed back at me.

"Remind me, they're not really your blood relations, are they?"

"No but they're as good as blood to me," he returned, face serious.

"Well then, yes, I do want to make a good impression," I admitted.

"You will," he assured me. "You saved Dante's life remember. Pretty sure you could rock up in a tutu and a hula hoop and they'd still love you."

"Hmm," I murmured, fighting back a grin.

"What?"

"Just picturing you in nothing but a tutu and a hula hoop now," I grinned. "I gotta say it really works for you too."

"I'll be sure to keep that in mind," he eyerolled, sliding into the front seat of my car.

I drove us the short distance towards Dante and Giulia's house, Mateo acting as my navigator until we arrived at the luxe stone villa on the inland hilly side of Esperance. I tried to tamp down my nerves as I reached for the bottle of wine I had bought, Italian of course, and then followed Mateo as he led us up the lit paving stones to the front door.

I had to give Mateo more credit than I'd originally given him when he reached down to squeeze my hand, dropping his hold before the door swung open. Giulia stood on the threshold, positively beaming at the two of us as Mateo smiled and ducked his head.

" Zietta ," he smiled, stepping towards her as she enveloped him in a hug.

" Caro ," Giulia replied, wrapping Mateo in a surprisingly firm stronghold. "And Jamie, you will always be welcome in our house," she added, pulling me into a matching hug as Mateo grinned at me from her side. "Both of you, my heroes." She clutched onto both our arms and led the way into the house.

"Mateo was the hero," I replied, sharing a smile with him over Giulia's head. "I was just doing my job."

"Nonsense," she replied firmly. "Our Dante would not be here without both of you so in our eyes you are both heroes."

Mateo just grinned and shrugged at me and I tried to hold back my smile whilst simultaneously ignoring the massive swoop in my gut that always accompanied his real smile. I'd been seeing a lot more of it recently but it never failed to extract the same reaction from me whenever it did come out.

We arrived in the large open plan living area and had the same effusive greeting from Dante as he stepped out of the kitchen.

"Jamie," he said, holding both my arms and looking at me with so much fondness I was almost blown over. "We are very honoured you could be here with us tonight. You and Mateo both."

"I am also honoured by your invitation," I replied. I handed him the bottle of wine and he looked down at it with a smile on his face.

"Chianti. My wife's favourite."

"Pure good luck," I laughed.

"Not luck. Fortune and fate," he returned. He squeezed my arm once more and then returned to the kitchen to pour glasses of wine for us all. I took the moment to search out Mateo's eyes, finding him watching me with a soft expression on his face.

Dante handed a glass of wine to each of us and then stood between us to make a toast. "To the family we make," he said, smiling affectionately at Mateo, "and to new friends becoming old friends," he added, holding his glass in my direction.

"I'll drink to that," I agreed, clinking glasses and taking a sip. I held Mateo's eye over my glass, noting how relaxed he was here amongst his chosen family. I wished I could provide a safe world for him to be always like this, to be able to live without that fear and anxiety of discovery. To be able to be himself and know he was still loved and valued by those whose opinions truly mattered.

Dante returned to the kitchen while Giulia showed me around her lovely architectural home which had been designed by Dante himself, the three of us ending up on the deck outside which overlooked a deep, green valley. The sky was already dark and the stars were out in full force and I brushed the back of Mateo's hand as he stood beside me, looking up at the night sky. He hooked his pinky finger around mine and my breath left my lungs.

"Dinner's ready," Dante called and the three of us returned to the house.

"Ooh the fancy dining room too, zietta ?" Mateo asked, delight on his face as we were led to what I assumed was the fancy dining room. It held a long, mahogany table set for four and decked out with candles and plates of incredible smelling food.

"Only the best for our darling boy and his very special friend," Giulia simpered back causing Mateo's cheeks to flush.

Mateo sat on the chair beside me and I reached under the table to clutch his thigh, squeezing him twice until he looked at me and smiled.

"Osso Buco," Dante announced, pulling the covers off the food as my mouth watered. "Risotto Milanese and creamy polenta with vegetables."

"Oh wow," I enthused. "I don't think I've ever seen food this good."

"Guests first," Giulia added, handing me the utensils. I was not one to stand on politeness, taking the utensils from her and filling up Mateo's plate first before doing the same for myself. He said nothing but I noted the soft smile on his face while I didn't miss the pointed looks passing between the other two.

"We were so pleased to hear that you and Mateo have been keeping in touch," Dante smoothly segued into the conversation.

" Zio ," Mateo whined.

"Yes, we have been keeping in touch. He's quite hard to forget," I replied, hiding my grin as Mateo's cheeks flushed again.

"He is very precious to us is our Mateo," Giulia said, eyes full of affection.

"I can see that."

"And I just think … well, I think the two of you make a perfect couple. Just gorgeous," she added so effusively I almost laughed.

" Zietta, you promised," Mateo groaned.

"I know but how can I not," she returned, bottom lip out in a pout. "All we want is for someone who can take care of you and love you the way you deserve."

Mateo looked half a second away from hyperventilating so I decided to step in and save him. "Mateo tells me you come from the same village in Italy as his family?"

I couldn't have picked on a better subject as Dante and Giulia both spoke over each other, eager to tell me all about their life in the old country. I felt Mateo relax beside me and I shared a quick grin with him while Dante and Giulia fell into a deep dispute over some minor fact about their province's history. It was enough to keep the topic of conversation safely off Mateo for the time being and I knew he was grateful for that. Hopefully he'd show me exactly how grateful he was later tonight.

It was getting late but it didn't feel at all as though the night was yet over. We'd eaten dessert already and I was so full I could hardly move. Dante and Giulia were great fun and I was enjoying spending time with them. We'd just moved into the front lounge, yes the fancy front lounge, and Mateo was currently edging closer to where we sat together on the two seater lounge.

Dante had just refilled our glasses with a delicious Marsala and I started to think I should slow down as I still had to drive Mateo home safely after this. I didn't mind if he kept drinking though because each sip seemed to send him another inch closer to where I was sitting and I didn't mind that at all as his arm brushed up against mine.

"How is your modelling work going, Mateo?" Dante asked as he sat on his brown leather armchair.

"Really good," Mateo replied, perking up in his seat. "Jamie came up with me to Sydney for my last photoshoot." He swivelled to look at me and I smiled down at him, seeing the way his eyes sparkled when talking about something he loved.

"Did you?" Dante asked, eyebrows raised.

"I did. It was quite eye opening," I replied, deciding not to mention the fact I'd only gone because Mateo's car had broken down. He could add that disclaimer in if he wanted to because I was sure he couldn't have missed the significant looks his aunty and uncle had shared at that little piece of news.

"You weren't bored standing around for hours?" Mateo asked, a little tease in his voice.

"Far from it," I returned, trying to hide the heat in my eyes as I pinched his waist. "You should tell your uncle about your talk with your agent," I prompted, knowing I should probably have just shut up but also knowing Mateo would likely never say anything without being pushed.

"Oh? What did your agent say?" Dante asked, picking up on my hint immediately.

"Nothing, zio ," Mateo returned, shooting me an unimpressed look.

"Don't be shy now," he smiled, waiting expectantly for Mateo to speak.

"It was nothing important."

"Just that he had a whole bunch of clients a mile long desperate to work with you," I threw in, hoping that the dark glare in Mateo's eyes would not curtail my hopes for the rest of the evening.

"Does he?" Dante asked in a way which said he was not surprised.

"That's hardly a surprise. You can't be as beautiful as Mateo for nothing," Giulia added in a tone that was so matter of fact I almost laughed. Well, would have if Mateo wasn't still shooting daggers at me.

"He's an absolute natural in front of the camera," I added, in for a penny now. "You should have seen him."

"I have zero doubt of that," Giulia added with a nod. She shared a glance with Dante, a significant look passing between them that had me suddenly thinking that maybe I'd made the right call here in speaking up.

"And Mateo, is that something you want to consider?" Dante prompted. "Taking on more modelling jobs?"

"No, Dante," Mateo grumped. "I won't leave you to deal with the firm on your own."

Dante let out a breath before he sank back in his seat, a contemplative look on his face. "I've been speaking with my doctor," he finally said, causing Mateo to glance up with concern in his eyes. "He is not altogether enthusiastic about my return to work."

"Really?" Mateo asked. "What did he say?"

"I told him I was ready to go back full time and he said if I did, I should expect to see him back in the ICU within the next few months."

"Dante, no."

"Well, I'm sixty-five this year, Mateo. I'm not exactly a spring chicken anymore," he said.

"So, what …" Mateo started but stopped. I felt him shift beside me, like he was on some kind of precipice and was afraid of the answer to his unspoken question.

"So what am I going to do?" Dante guessed. "That was what I wanted to talk to you about. I know the firm is not your passion, Mateo, but if you want to take over the business I will gladly hand it over to you. My guess though, is that this is not what you want."

Mateo was quiet, the thoughts running across his face as I reached over and squeezed his hand, letting him know I was there.

"Dante, I …" he began.

"You don't need to say anything to me right now, Mateo," Dante said, holding his hand up. "I've already started putting feelers out in the industry and I've had a few bites. I won't have any trouble selling the business if that is what's holding you back. But I want you to know I'd give it to you in a heartbeat but I will only do that if you want it."

"But what will you do?" Mateo asked. "You love the firm."

"I do," he chuffed out a laugh. "And I hope to be able to stay on in some sort of consultancy role to whoever buys the business. I'm not quite ready to be put out to pasture just yet."

"And you, darling Mateo," Giulia added, her tone full of affection. "We just want what will make you happy. If that is not the firm then we will still love you and bless you wherever you go. If you want to commit to your modelling career full time you know you have our blessing."

Mateo said nothing, emotions clear in his eyes. He shifted his gaze to Dante, the man whose approval meant more to him than anyone else's in the world.

"Dante?"

"You know you have my blessing," he said, expression serious. "With whatever you do," he added, nodding significantly in my direction.

"I don't know what to say," Mateo said, blinking back tears.

"Don't say anything right now," Dante replied. "Just think it over. I know where your heart truly lies though and I will be shocked and maybe even a little disappointed if you don't follow your dreams. I want you to follow your dreams, tesoro ."