Chapter 24

24

SUTTON

A few weeks ago, I would’ve scoffed at the idea of diving into something new with Hawk. Mostly because I wouldn’t have believed that he’d actually be interested in something serious. Yet here he was, kissing me like I was precious and having clearly stated his intentions.

My head spun. Less than an hour ago, I’d given up on him completely. I hadn’t even thought our friendship would be salvageable, let alone a romantic relationship.

Why I always let Hailey get in my head, I didn’t know. Ultimately, despite her strange, quasi-threat about Winnie performing, I knew my daughter was in no real danger from her. At that moment when she’d said it, it’d pushed me over the edge, but at the end of the day, Hailey was no more than a former mean girl.

I knew next to nothing about her marriage, other than that it seemed to be unhappy, considering how possessive she was about Hawk, but she had a little girl to think about. I got that.

Hailey was also very pretty and she always had been, but that was nothing to be intimidated by.

After speaking to Hawk, I’d realized that nothing she said actually mattered. Only he and I had ever known what was going on in our relationship, and that was exactly how it should be. He didn’t care about her, didn’t want her, and wasn’t going to leave me for her.

As I’d been listening to him, I’d also realized she had become a definite pressure point for me, unsurprising given my recent romantic history. Knowing that another woman, a gorgeous one who ostensibly had much more to offer than I did, was interested in the same man I was drove me a little cuckoo.

I wasn’t sure if or how I would ever get over that, but I held Hawk’s face in my palms and pulled away from his kiss for a moment to speak against his lips. “I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have lost it on you like that.”

He drew his head back, his eyes full of heat and desire but also that same vulnerability I’d seen from him earlier. “You were cheated on for years during a marriage , Sutton. I’m not sure what Hailey said to you to trigger all that, but I will reassure you as much and as often and for as long as you need me to. I do not want anyone else and I would never do that to you.”

Even as he said it, I couldn’t help but draw parallels between what had happened with Hawk and Hailey and Maeve and Calen. I knew that there were massive differences, but in both instances, the man I loved had chosen another woman over me.

I was terrified of it happening again, but as Hawk stared down into my eyes, his weight crushing my body into the mattress and his voice so fierce and vehement, I knew it was really time for me to start putting it all behind me.

No matter what happened in the past, this was the here and now, and I really did want to try making things work with Hawk. If I kept letting Hailey or Calen get in my way, that would never happen.

I will not let them ruin this. I will be brave. I will take the leap with this man, the first one I ever loved and the only one I never truly stopped loving, and I will give it my all.

Lifting my head, I pushed my lips against his and kissed him deeply, deciding that I was going to forgive him. I promised myself all these things and more. I poured my unspoken resolve into the kiss and hoped that he felt that I meant it.

He groaned into the kiss. His tongue parted my lips, and he slid a hand through my hair, gathering it in a grip that bordered on painful but sent a shiver of pleasure through me. I sighed into his mouth and finally ran my hands down the strong expanse of his back, hooking my fingers into the waistband of his jeans.

Since his fly was already open, all it took was for him to lift his hips and I could easily push them off. He kicked them away, his mouth never leaving mine. He reached for the buttons on my shirt, undoing them deftly and quickly. Then he parted the two sides, leaving the shirt on for now.

Breaking his mouth away from mine, he dragged his lips across my jaw and throat and kissed a path down the center of my abdomen until he reached my panties. He inhaled, glancing at me.

I met his gaze and dropped my chin in a nod in case that was what he was waiting for. Eyes locked on mine, he slid his fingers into my waistband and pulled my panties off before burying his face between my legs. So focused on my pleasure that I was still partially clothed, Hawk licked through my folds and nipped at my clit, spreading my legs further apart with his hands.

I trembled with the force of the need that raced through me, the pleasure already building. He kept working his magic. My hips bucked, my fingers clawed at the sheets, and my eyes slammed shut.

Hawk’s fingers ran along the insides of my thighs. One of them ended right at my entrance and pressed against it, and he sucked my clit into his mouth. I moaned. My muscles tensed. His tongue flicked and circled, and his finger slid inside me, causing so many more sensations to blast through my sensitive body.

Exquisite pleasure washed over me. My orgasm built and built and finally broke free when his teeth grazed across my clit once more. I thrashed against him, grabbing a pillow to scream into as the climax raced through me.

As the pleasure started subsiding, I tossed the pillow to the side and gathered the last of my strength to grab him and roll him over. Hawk smiled, but I saw the tension in his jaw and glanced down at his cock. I wasted no time to bend over to take it into my mouth.

My heart was still pounding in the aftermath of the orgasm. My skin still tingled and my ears still rang, but I didn’t want him to have to wait any longer either. My lips slid around his tip and he hissed. I wrapped my fingers around the base of him and started stroking, and his hips trembled.

“Sutton,” he warned, his voice a low growl. His hand traveled into my hair and gripped it hard again as his hips started moving in time with my strokes. “I’m not?—”

I brought my free hand to his hip and squeezed, wanting him to know that I was aware of what he had been about to say and that I didn’t care. Closing my eyes, I focused my efforts on bringing him the same kind of pleasure he’d just brought me, and I felt it when he surrendered, obviously deciding to let go.

His hips started moving more freely. His muscles flexed and quivered. His breath caught as he swelled in my mouth. I moaned in response, loving the knowledge that he was so obviously enjoying what I was doing.

A few strokes later, he came hard. Jets of his release pumped into my mouth as he growled my name. I swallowed it all, ridiculously proud of myself for achieving the desired effect so fast. Grinning, I finally released him, crawled up to his side, and caught my breath while he did the same. Then he smiled and kissed me again, making out with me until we were both raring to go. Producing a condom from his wallet, he rolled it on and took my hands, helping me to get on top of him.

My gaze locked on his. I got into position and slowly started sinking down, taking in every last detail of his expression and committing them to memory. Hawk’s brow furrowed slightly, his lips parted. and his tongue peeked out to swipe across them. His pupils were dilated as his eyes held mine. His jaw tensed as I slid home.

In that moment, he seemed so open and so vulnerable that some of the last guards I’d built around my heart to keep him out cracked. Tears pressed at the backs of my eyes. The enormity of my feelings for him rushed to the fore and I bent over, slanted my lips over his, and kissed him deeply. Then I started moving.

Pleasure sparked deep within me. He rubbed against parts of me that made my entire body tingle and I moaned, meeting each of his thrusts when he pushed into me. Our fingers entwined, our mouths clashed together again and again. Our bodies raced to reach that delicious precipice all over again.

We flew over the edge together. Our kisses grew sloppy until neither of us could keep them up anymore. The grip of our fingers tightened as we swallowed each other’s moans. I collapsed next to him as the pleasure subsided. I slid a hand around his waist and rested my head on his shoulder.

“I’m going to try, Hawk,” I promised quietly, closing my eyes. I prayed that I would learn to trust him again before I did something to blow up what we had together over stuff that happened in the past.

He pressed a kiss to my forehead and stroked my back. “I know, baby. I know you are and I am too. We’ll work it out, okay? We’re going to be just fine.”

I nodded, cuddling into his side and falling asleep, the emotions of the evening finally taking their toll.

The next morning, I must’ve slept through my alarm because when my eyes flew open, I heard my mom and Winnie in the apartment. “I had some breakfast at Grammy’s house.”

“Eggs and toast,” my mother added for some reason. I couldn’t quite figure out why they were talking like there was someone else there, but I didn’t have time to think about that right now.

My heart started pounding in my chest and panic gripped my senses, but when I looked over, I saw that Hawk wasn’t in my bed anymore.

He probably slipped out hours ago . I rolled out of bed and quickly grabbed some pajamas, hurriedly pulling them on.

As I did, I suddenly heard Hawk’s voice join the conversation. “That’s the breakfast of champions.”

Winnie giggled. “My teacher says eggs are the best and I love her, so now I think they’re the best too.”

“Logan loves her as well,” Hawk replied. “He won’t stop talking about her. I’m glad you guys are in class together and that you’ve got her. Think she’d let me into her class too? I think I’d still fit on those chairs and you make it sound like so much fun over there.”

Winnie laughed. “You’re too big! The chair would break.”

Hawk groaned, chuckling. I raced out of my bedroom and found him dressed, drinking coffee, and chatting with my mom and Winnie. Mom was blushing happily while my daughter was jumping around in her backpack.

“Good morning, Mam.” Winnie beamed at me, rushing over to give me a hug. “Hawk wants to come to school with me. Isn’t that crazy?”

I blinked hard, still struggling to process what was going on here. “So crazy.”

He winked when I met his gaze. Then he came over. To my complete and absolute shock, he gave me a kiss on the cheek. Right in front of my mother, who he grinned at. “I’ll walk Winnie to school. Let’s go, little one. I want to get there in time to test those chairs. If they can take my weight, I’m staying.”

She bounded after him excitedly, not even giving either my mother or myself a wave goodbye as she rushed to catch up with him. Their laughter and chatter drifted up into the apartment as they descended the stairs, and Mom and I exchanged stunned glances.

Finally, Mom laughed. “Your father is going to have a heart attack when he finds out.”

My head shook slowly as I tried to process the last few minutes of my life. “You know what? I need some coffee before I even start thinking about what just happened. Would you like some?”

“Love some,” she said, taking a seat at the kitchen counter. I drifted around it and poured us some coffee from the pot Hawk must’ve made. “So, do you want to talk about it?”

I motioned at the coffee, still blinking much too hard and much too frequently. “Caffeine first. Questions later. But I will tell you one thing.”

“Yeah?” she asked, her eyes sparkling with laughter and excitement when they met mine. “What’s that?”

“I think I might have to figure out how to talk to Winnie about me having a boyfriend.” Those were words I’d never expected to say, but my heart gave a joyful little skip at admitting them out loud.

Hawk and I were together, figuring things out, and trying a relationship we’d failed at before. While I was nervous as hell, I was also cautiously optimistic about it.

What’s that saying again? If you love someone set them free. If they come back, they’re yours, and if not, it was never meant to be.

It felt right with Hawk this time. It felt good, and most importantly, it felt like it was meant to be. We’d set each other free and here we were, a decade later, our feelings still as real as ever. That had to mean something.

All that remained now was convincing myself that I could trust him enough to give us a chance of actually living out our happily ever after.