Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

EMERSYN

W aiting until after I spoke to the new instructors and went over the class schedules with them, as well as student assessments, just added an edge to my own impatience. Freddie’s news was incredible. I couldn’t remember the last time he said he wanted something for himself.

As soon as we wrapped though, he climbed into the passenger seat of the car while I drove us back to the clubhouse. I’d sent a message to the guys earlier and asked for family dinner tonight. There would be some schedule juggling, but they all said they would be there.

“Theo might be there too,” I reminded Freddie. “I can take him out for dinner if you need the time.” It would mean not being there for the discussion, but I didn’t want Freddie to be remotely uncomfortable.

“I don’t care if the kid is there,” Freddie said. “I kind of like the punk.”

The punk.

The description fit Theo so much.

“For once, I’m not the youngest and I actually get to give someone else advice.” He shrugged. “He’s family.”

I was going to poke him about not being the youngest when I was there either, but I loved that description. Theo had become something of a baby brother to all of them.

He played tough so much. We got it, all of us. I saw it in Mickey’s eyes and in Jasper’s. None of us got to be kids. Maybe our experiences were different, but we recognized it in each other. So, if Theo needed to play tough, we could support it.

But he deserved to be a kid too. He deserved those days in the sun. If I did nothing else, I was going to make sure he got that. Seeing the smile in Milo’s eyes now, and the difference in him since I’d first met him?

I wanted that for Theo too.

“Hey,” Freddie said, settling his hand on my thigh as we idled at the traffic light. “My turn. You okay?”

“Worrying,” I admitted.

“About me?”

“No. I mean, yes. I always worry about you guys, but not specifically about you . Not right now.” I blew out a breath as the light changed and I put my foot down on the accelerator. I loved the car. I loved the freedom of driving myself. Didn’t mean I didn’t love riding with them too. Like now. “Truthfully, I hate that you felt the need to score. At the same time, I am so damn proud of you for flushing it and reaching out for help.”

He gave my leg a squeeze. “Thank you. So if not us, what are you worrying about?”

“Theo. The tour. What comes next. How to hold onto all of this.” The words tumbled out of me. “It feels like this has been our normal for so short a time and I’m happy , Freddie. Really happy. I want to keep being happy with you guys and I want you to be happy.”

“You’re worried it’s going to slip through your fingers?” He stroked a slow circle with his thumb against my leg.

“Yes,” I said, shaking my head. “I know it’s stupid but…”

“It’s not stupid, Boo-Boo. We don’t take being happy for granted. We don’t take having the people we want around us for granted either. Honestly, I don’t think we take anything for granted.”

When I glanced at him, I found him watching me, head against the seat. “No, we don’t.” I had to agree. “I never want to take it for granted either.”

“You won’t,” he said. “In fact, right now, we’re making a pact. Neither of us will take it for granted. If you think I’m slipping, I expect you to poke me.”

“Well, the same goes for you if you see me doing it.”

“Deal.”

The offer, and the agreement, helped. It helped tremendously. Liam was just climbing off his bike as I pulled into the garage. Kellan and Jasper were there and Mickey was right behind me. We were all arriving at the same time.

Laughter bubbled up through me as Jasper strode over to open my driver’s side door before I’d barely parked. He unsnapped my seatbelt and tugged me out for a hug.

“Called it,” he said. “I win. She’s mine.”

Liam snorted. “Five bucks on Hellspawn.”

“Ten,” Freddie called as he climbed out. “Boo-Boo has skills.”

“Hush,” I told them, but the warmth of having them there was like a balm for my soul. I never realized how much they insulated me until they were all around me. I dropped a kiss on Jasper’s lips before he passed me over to Kellan. Then it was a round of kisses, one from Kel, then Liam, and Mickey.

Vaughn, Rome, and Theo were inside with the stacks of pizza, garlic bread, and sticky cinnamon treats. Theo made a face when Rome and then Vaughn gave me kisses. Despite the PDAs, he hadn’t really asked me anything about it and I was fine with not explaining.

It just sounded like a wildly uncomfortable conversation to have. Probably better if the guys addressed it all around, though it wasn’t until I was settled with pizza on a plate in my lap that I realized that half of Theo’s face was blue, not bright blue but like he’d scrubbed a lot of it off but his skin was still stained blue, blue.

“Did you fall into the paint or something?”

Rome chuckled, the pure merriment a magical enough sound despite Theo’s grumbling.

“Translation,” Liam said. “Theo didn’t listen to Rome.”

“Not true,” Theo argued. “I did listen.”

“Not immediately,” Rome said. “Or you wouldn’t be blue.”

Laughter rippled around the room. Theo made a face, but he seemed more flushed from embarrassment than any real discomfort. The humor reflected in his eyes and he shot me a grin. “I paid attention after,” he said. “I promise.”

I wasn’t the only one who snuck a look toward Rome who only shrugged. Jasper eyed Liam who chuckled. “Translation, eventually.”

More laughter and I shook my head. “Will you listen to him in the future?”

It was Theo’s turn to lift his shoulders and Freddie piped in with, “Translation: theo -retically.”

I almost inhaled my pizza. Kellan had to pat my back when I choked on the cheese. Rome high-fived Freddie and even Theo grinned widely.

“Children,” Jasper said, wiping away an imaginary tear. “They do us proud.”

Freddie answered him with a single middle finger, but the air of mirth remained. I indulged in a soda in between bites of pizza as the conversation shifted from ribbing Theo to asking him about school.

Instead of arguing about classes or growing more sullen, he actually answered with some animation. We’d found a school that allowed him to do some classes remote while the hands-on subjects, including science and mechanics, required in-person classes.

“We’re starting our first engine rebuild next week,” he said, eyeing Kellan. “Are you still okay with me working on some of it at the shop? I’ll have to bring the three others on my team.” From his grimace, I wasn’t sure that Theo was okay with bringing them.

“Fine by me,” Kellan said. “You can’t be there during closing hours, and you need me or Jasper on site while you’re there.”

Rome cleared his throat and Kellan gave him a look.

“You sure?”

Rome shrugged.

“Okay, so when Rome is in town, then Rome can chaperone.”

“Is that a test to see if I’ll listen?” The dryness in Theo’s tone earned an equally dry look from Rome.

“You’ll listen.” He didn’t even have to add an or else, because Theo just spread his hands.

“I’ll listen, but thank you all. I know we’re supposed to do some of the work in the shop at the tech school and that’s fine for the basics, but I’d rather build the new engine in a more controlled environment.”

That led to a few more questions about the style of the engine, the rpms, and more items that I really didn’t understand. Mickey had a hand wrapped around my nape and had begun to massage the tension there lightly. I let my eyes fall half-closed, just enjoying the flow of conversation.

Liam and Jasper had kicked off a joint venture with the launch of five new trucks to handle transport for the clothing stores and more. Liam had been looking to expand for a while. Between Mickey’s safe houses, the reclamation projects here in the city, and Jasper growing the transport business, it seemed a good time to combine them.

“It also means we can dedicate more trucks to the tour so you don’t have to shift the schedule as much,” Jasper pointed out. “Unless you want to change it, and we’re always fine to make it work.”

“But it will be easier on everyone when or if you need to do it,” Kellan said, then dropped a kiss on the top of my head. “I approve.”

Tilting my head back, I smiled up at him. Mickey was going to knock me out at this rate. I was melting into the sofa. Kellan wasn’t helping by rubbing my thigh. It was just… nice.

“Speaking of tours,” Freddie said. “I’m going to need to step out of the next one—maybe not all of it—and I already talked to Boo-Boo about it.”

“What’s up?” Jasper asked as he focused on him. I caught Freddie’s gaze and winked. His smile relaxed some of the tension in his face.

“I want to go to school.” He leaned forward, capturing the attention of everyone. “So hear me out…”

He laid out his plan and his reasons. Mickey’s hand stilled on my nape at the mention of Ms. Stephanie. It was my turn to reach for his free hand and he gripped it in return.

“I’m okay, Little Bit,” he murmured, brushing a kiss to my temple. “Just a surprise—but a good one.” I squeezed his hand. I was so proud of Freddie, he didn’t hold back, even bringing up his near slip. While the guys had known about it, I think it was as much to confirm that he’d told me as to lay out where it fell in his reasoning.

When he finished, Freddie spread his hands.

“It’s a lot, I know, but… I really want to do it. I never realized how much I was looking for something more in my life until this idea hit me. Boo-Boo asked me to talk to those kids and I couldn’t think of a worse person. Then I did and it took time, but I got through to them. Maybe I won’t be good at it…”

Self-doubt crept into those last words.

“You’d be good.” Rome rose from where he’d been seated and flipped closed two of the empty pizza boxes. “I would talk to you too.”

Freddie blinked, disbelief and shock vying for supremacy on his expression.

“What he said,” Vaughn agreed as he stretched. “What do you need? Like—school wise? Besides the downtime, which I’m sure Dove already approved enthusiastically.” He grinned at me and I answered with a smile of my own.

“Absolutely, in fact I’d sign up and go to school with you if you wanted.” Granted, I’d been out of schools completely since I was eight and all of my education came through tutors.

“Hmm… do you have a list of schools?” Liam asked, his phone out. “We need to find the best options for you, particularly if you don’t want to head out of state or live near the campus in another state.”

“No,” Freddie said, swiftly. “The state U here has a social work degree.”

“That’s a good start,” Mickey said. “Once you get licensed, there’s always continuing education courses, and some of those are online as well. But a lot of what you need to know you do, this would be more about expanding your knowledge base.”

“State U here has entry requirements. Assessment tests…” I could practically hear Liam’s thoughts whirling.

“I hate tests,” Freddie admitted. “Hopefully that’s not a sticking point.”

“I can help,” Theo offered and I flicked a look to where he was leaning forward. “Like you guys did with me. Turns out I’m really good at testing strategies. According to Ms. Franklin at the center, she said I have a good way of approaching them. So if you want, I can walk you through it to see if it helps.”

“If you don’t mind,” Freddie said. “I heard they had classes on how to study, probably something I should consider too.”

“Yeah, that shit was annoying,” Theo muttered, but at Jasper’s side eye, he raised his hands. “I said it was annoying, not that it wasn’t useful.”

“Better,” Jasper said, then looked at Freddie. “Whatever you need.”

“Well, it’s going to cost—” Freddie started and it was his turn to swallow his words as Liam glanced at him. “Liam, you can’t pay for all of it.”

“Why not?” He raised his eyebrows.

“Because…” Freddie spread his hands. “I have to do some of this on my own.”

“Why?” Kellan asked, not an ounce of judgment in his voice.

“You have to do the classes,” Mickey said. “You’ll have to take the tests, do the work, and make the time to study. You’ll have to face your own demons on the way. All of that is something you have to do. Why can’t we help you pay for it?”

Freddie seemed at a total loss.

“When Milo went to law school, he used loans and we pooled resources. We did that to buy the first truck,” Jasper said. “We did it again every time we expanded here at the warehouse—whether it was the business or the clubhouse itself.”

“Same with my investment at the first shop,” Vaughn added. “Kel at the mechanic’s shop, he needed to get certified and trained. We’ve always pooled resources.”

As if seeking help, Freddie looked at me and I smiled. “I want to help with anything you need, and if that means making sure you have no school loans to worry about? Then why can’t we do that? You’re the only one who can do this for you Freddie, but we want to be a part of it. We want to be there for you—just like you guys have all been here for me.”

“Basically,” Liam said. “But also, you’re my baby brother. You want to go to school, you get to go to school. I don’t want you worrying about bills, classes, or books. That’s a luxury we can afford.”

“Don’t fight him,” Rome said. “He’ll just do it anyway, then you’ll fight. But it won’t stop him.”

Rolling his eyes, Liam stared at Rome.

His twin just shrugged. “Am I wrong?”

The silence held sway for a moment, then laughter exploded through the room.

“Fine,” Freddie said, still laughing. “You guys can pay.” At the same time, his eyes shone and his face was flushed. When he stole another look at me, I just grinned at him. We all wanted to help him.

Satisfaction blew through me like a desert wind, because he was going to let us.