Chapter 8

Hot as in Hot Sauce…

NOW

(Beth)

I knew exactly what I was doing when I showed up to the bar.

No calls. No texts.

Just a few muttered words in the craziness of the moment a week ago. A date. A time. Already knowing the place.

Now the only thing that could have been different was if Leith really was a different person. If everything in life was heading the way he wanted and the words perfect and happy were friends to him.

Which was fine.

And even if he were to show up - or I show up since this was his place and his night - was there anything wrong with it? A part of my life and my heart and my soul would forever have Leith's initials etched into them.

In some way, I wanted to know he was happy. I wanted to know that everything that went wrong with us didn't put him on the same path that it put me on. Because there were years that existed in my life that were more of a blur than a memory.

When the door shut behind me, I was hit with the nose tingling smell of wing sauce, along with an array of perfumes, colognes, dust, and just the regular old smell of a bar that had seen a good life and was in need of updating. But that need was what made the place comfortable. Where I worked, it was almost fancy. The money was great because of that fanciness, but a bar like this had a sense of home.

There was Leith sitting where I could only assume he sat each time he came.

This was his spot. And I was invading it.

Which didn't bother me.

I was used to it.

I always loved pushing at him and seeing how far I could go before he pushed back. Of course, by then the tension between was so intense that it would explode into something else.

Trouble. Love.

That was our thing.

Was.

I walked to the empty seat next to Leith and purposely brushed my left shoulder against his right arm as I climbed up on the barstool.

He turned his head and did a double take.

"Beth."

"Oh. Hey."

He looked over his shoulder. "Are you alone?"

"Tonight I am. Don't want to cause any problems."

Leith laughed. "I've never heard you say that before."

"Well, it's been a while. Things change. People change."

"Do they?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, curling my lip.

"Nothing," he said. "Please, just forget I said anything. Last thing I need is another argument on my hands here."

"Another…"

I let the word drift off as the bartender came to ask what I wanted.

I ordered the same cheap beer Leith was drinking and from the corner of my eye I saw the way he looked into his glass.

… another argument…

I wondered what that meant.

I saw Leith's phone on the bar. I was tempted to touch the screen and see if that picture of him that beautiful, blue-eyed woman was still on the screen.

"So what brings you here?" I asked him.

"Thursday." He grinned. "You?"

"Thursday."

Leith laughed. "It's never that cut and dry with you."

"Wow. Are you just going to keep attacking me?"

"Sorry," he said. He rubbed his jaw. "Look… I just came for my wings and two beers."

"Oh yeah? You have a routine?"

"Yeah, I do."

"So you live your life knowing exactly what's going to happen and when?"

Leith's eyebrows curled down. "Is that a problem?"

"You tell me."

"I'm a teacher, Beth. I have lesson plans. I have routines. It's the only way to handle a classroom of third graders. They get easily distracted."

"Big bad teacher," I said. "They must be terrified by you."

"Why?"

"You're about ten feet tall."

"It's usually a shock at first," he said.

"I bet. So you have this routine at school and then in life, huh?"

"What's your point?"

He was already irritated with me.

This is going to be a weird night.

"What if you sat at a table instead of the bar?" I asked. "Would that cause an issue?"

"No."

I stood up. "Good. Order me whatever you're having. You know I can handle it hot."

I walked away with my drink and it took me a few steps before realizing what I just said and what it could have been implied as.

Crap.

I froze and retraced my steps, walking backward.

"Leith."

He turned.

I was standing.

He was sitting.

He was still way taller than me.

"I didn't mean that."

"What?"

"The hot comment," I said. "I didn't mean it to sound like that. I meant… you now…"

"Hot sauce," he said. "I know, Beth. We used to road trip to the beach and go to that taco stand."

"We got our picture taken and put on the wall."

"I know," he said. "I was there."

"Yeah. I'm not…" I licked my bottom lip.

"Why are you nervous?" he asked.

"Who said I'm nervous?"

"You're licking your bottom lip."

I instantly stopped.

I forgot for a moment that Leith knew all my tricks. All my quirks. The good. The bad.

"I'm not here to mess anything up," I said. "Okay?"

"Okay…"

"It's good to see you. And last week kind of ended so quickly. I figured if you were here again tonight… you have someone. You're happy. You're engaged. I would never do anything to screw that up. I'm not that kind of person."

"Extra hot it is," Leith said. "I'll bring extra drinks too."

I nodded.

As I turned, Leith grabbed for my hand.

Well, my wrist.

His strong grip wrapped tight around my wrist.

All the air was lost from my body.

"You're wrong."

"Wrong?" I asked. "About what?"

Leith took a few seconds to think about what he was going to say. "I'm not engaged…"

It shouldn't have hit me the way it did.

Even if Leith wasn't engaged, he was still with someone.

Our lives were no longer parallel like they had been once before. We were lucky enough to run into each other at a random bar on a random night. And even then, we had talked for a few minutes before I got into a fight. And he saved me. And then it was all over because we were no longer close.

I sat at the table and watched Leith approaching, carrying his glass.

He looked like a lumberjack. He always had that look to himself too. But the checkered patten shirt really added to it. It wasn't a flannel though. It was a nice shirt . Which didn't seem right for Leith to be wearing. But it was just more proof of how far apart our paths had gone.

But even through that nice shirt , the roundness of his shoulders and bulk of his arms pressed against the fabric, looking ready to explode. I had no idea how kids weren't afraid of him. And I meant what I said last week. There were probably a lot of horny moms looking for a parent-teacher conference with him.

"What's so funny?" he asked as he sat down.

I hadn't realized I was laughing.

"Nothing."

"Seriously…"

"I got you to break your routine," I said. "How typical, right?"

"Just no bar fights tonight," he said. "I have a reputation."

"Oh, you do?"

"Yeah. That's why I come here. So I don't run into anyone. Don't need people thinking I'm some drunk teacher looking for a fight."

"Or you just want to avoid seeing all the moms."

"Back to that again?"

"Come on. You can't tell me it hasn't happened…"

"I don't know what world you live in, Beth," he said. "But that doesn't happen."

"I'm sure the dads are all intimidated by you too."

Leith lifted his right eyebrow.

I showed my hands. "Okay. Fine. Sorry." I took a sip of my beer. "This is gross."

"It's cheap."

"Very cheap."

"Order something else."

"No. It's okay. It'll remind me of you."

"Then cheers," Leith said.

He lifted his glass.

I lifted mine.

They clanked together.

And then came a moment in my mind that would probably define the night.

I wasn't shy about holding back.

And I wasn't about to change it.

Before Leith could put his glass down, the question spilled from my mouth.

"If you're not engaged, why is she wearing a ring?"

Leith's eyes went wide. "Wow. You picked up on that."

"I'm a girl. I see a diamond…"

"Bullshit," Leith said. "You? A girl? Diamonds?"

I showed my left hand. "I wore a diamond ring, Leith."

"Where is it now?"

"Real nice."

"What?"

"Just answer my question first."

"Okay," Leith said. "The ring is on her right hand."

"Oh. There's a twist."

"Is it?"

"Maybe. I thought you were engaged."

"And does it matter if I am or not?"

"I guess not," I said. "Just… whatever. Sorry for assuming that. That's a lot of pressure."

"Not really."

"If you say so," I said. "But a diamond ring on her right hand. Isn't that kind of cheap?"

"How so?"

"Well, it's like a… like a promise that maybe you'll propose to her. Kind of like saying, ‘I love you, baby, but you know, not that much… but here's a ring to remind me that I owe you a better ring when I, you know, get those feelings…' "

"Is that your tough guy voice?" Leith asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Sorry it's not as cool as your voice."

"I don't think my voice is cool," Leith said.

"True. And stop trying to change the subject."

"I'm not changing anything, Beth. You're scatter brained."

I scoffed. "Excuse me?"

"Oh, look, a squirrel!" Leith said.

I stupidly turned my head.

Then I groaned.

He was the only person that could scramble my brain.

He burst into laughter.

"Yeah, laugh it up at me," I said. "You just don't want to talk about you being a pussy."

"What?" Leith asked.

"You heard me. You give a girl a ring and it's not the right one…"

"Wait a second," he said. "You're divorced."

"Your point?"

Leith leaned forward. "I mean, honestly… if Joel hadn't proposed…"

"You want to talk about me?" I asked.

"What if I do?"

A guy walked to our table, carrying two baskets of wings.

It was time to eat.

Which was good.

Opening up the past would only screw up everything in our lives.