Chapter 32

thirty-two

. . .

Ruby

“Well, this was an interesting night,”Dereck said, as I finished closing the bar. We were the last two people here, and I couldn’t wait to get home, because I’d barely been holding it together the last few hours.

“I guess you could say that.”

I reached for my keys and walked him through the kitchen to the back door. Thankfully, he had a rental car of his own, and I would finally be alone in my car as soon as I said my goodbyes.

He’d come all the way here to talk to me, and falling apart in front of him wouldn’t be fair.

“Listen, Ruby, I know that scene earlier was upsetting.” He cleared his throat and reached out to touch my shoulder when we stopped in front of our cars. He was a good guy, and I knew he felt bad for me after he’d witnessed River losing his shit on both me and him.

And unfortunately, River’s words were embedded in my head.

And now you’re jumping right back into his bed, huh?

Rule number one. No catching feelings. I guess the evil queen was the only one still playing the game.

I couldn’t wrap my head around the way that he’d reacted. I was planning to go talk to him about my decision after work tonight, now that I had spoken to both Dean Langston and Terrence. I saw this day going a whole lot differently than it had.

I also did not expect Dereck to show up in Magnolia Falls. I hadn’t returned his calls over the last two days because I didn’t know what I was going to do. I’d made the call to Dean Langston this morning and apologized for changing my mind, and Dereck had already been on his way here.

“I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me. It was sweet of you to come here,” I said, but all I wanted at the moment was to get into my car and be alone.

“Well, I told you that it was for selfish reasons. I was worried that you hadn’t signed the contract because of me. Obviously, I wanted you to come back. You earned that job, and sure, maybe a part of me was still holding out hope,” he said, holding his hands up to stop me from interrupting. “That’s on me. You made your feelings clear long before you left town. But that didn’t stop me from hoping something would change when we spent some time apart. And now I know that it did.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, as a slight breeze moved around us.

“That friend of yours, the one who came barreling into the kitchen tonight and made a scene,” he said, as he sighed.

“He’s hardly my friend at the moment.”

“Ruby, you don’t have to lie to me to protect my feelings. It actually makes sense why you don’t want to leave.”

“It has nothing to do with him.”

At least it doesn’t at the moment.

“Listen, the last thing I want to do is give you advice about another man. But that little scene back there was fueled by a whole lot of feelings. He was jealous and wounded; that much was easy to see.”

“He behaved like a jackass, which shouldn’t surprise me. He’s hotheaded and stubborn and—ridiculous. I can’t even believe that he just did that at my place of work.” I threw my hands in the air.

Dereck smiled, and I saw the empathy in his eyes. “It’s a bar, so it wasn’t that out of place. And sometimes your feelings are so strong that you can’t control them. I wish I could be that passionate when I needed to be.”

“I much prefer a more subdued approach,” I said, with a little chuckle, trying to shake off the heaviness of the evening.

“I don’t think that’s true.” His gaze locked with mine. “There’s something there, and we both know it. Hell, anyone with eyeballs could see that much. Don’t find a reason to run from it just because things got ugly. Find out why he reacted that way. I’ve never seen you look so wounded either, so obviously, there’s something deep here.”

“I can’t be with someone who flies off the handle at me when he has no idea what’s going on. Who does that?”

“Someone who loves a woman more than anything else and thinks he’s losing her,” he said.

“Well, that’s not how you show someone that you love them.”

“There’s no right or wrong way to show someone how you feel. The question is, do you feel the same way? That’s the key.” He looked away, and my chest squeezed. Because he’d actually professed his love to me in a mature, normal, caring way, and I’d rejected him.

“Dereck.” I shook my head and squeezed his hand. “I’m so sorry if I hurt you. I didn’t know that you were feeling that way. You caught me off guard when you told me.”

“Don’t ever apologize for being honest. I knew it was a long shot.” He smirked. “I’m okay, Ruby. I’ve started dating again, and I’ve met someone that I’ve been spending a little time with. She wanted me to come here, too, and get the closure that she thought I needed. I didn’t come here to guilt you or try to change your mind. I came here because I was afraid you were turning down the job because you were uncomfortable about working with me. We’re friends, and I care about you. But now I know there’s a much bigger reason that you didn’t take that job. And it actually makes me very happy. I feared you’d never let yourself have it. You deserve happiness, so don’t run from that.”

I moved forward and wrapped my arms around him. “Thank you. It means a lot that you came here.”

He hugged me tight before we both stepped back. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Of course. You know me. I’m always okay.”

“I’m always here for you if you need a friend.”

“Same. And I want to hear more about this new lady you’ve met. I’m happy for you. You should give her a chance, Dereck.” I jangled my keys and took another step back. “Let’s talk soon.”

“Looking forward to it.”

He waited until I got into my car, and I watched as he did the same, and he pulled out of the lot behind me. I drove a block toward my house and pulled over on the side of the road, put the car in park, and let it all out.

River thought that I’d been with Dereck the whole time. That I was… what? Sleeping with both of them? He thought I’d lied the whole time and basically accused me of being a complete asshole.

He is the asshole.

The tears started falling, and they didn’t stop, and an unrecognizable sob left my throat. My chest ached. My stomach was twisting.

And I’d never felt so alone.

Like I’d just lost my best friend and the man I loved all in one swoop.

I’d never told a man that I loved him outside of my father, and I’d made a decision to stay here, and that decision had a lot to do with my feelings for River.

Magnolia Falls felt right for me.

But now, I wondered if I’d made a huge mistake.

Love was a bitch, and this was why you didn’t give your heart away. Hell, I hadn’t even told the man how I felt yet, and he’d already stomped on my heart.

The bastard.

I reached into my purse for some tissue, and my shoulders shook and quaked, and I remembered that time in the elevator when I’d broken down in front of River.

He’d been the one to comfort me.

That day and every day since.

And now I didn’t have a clue where we stood.

The more I cried, the angrier I got. I would not allow any man to control my emotions like this.

I pulled the rearview mirror down and cleaned up my face, calmed my breathing, and let out a few deep breaths.

“You’re fine. You’re in control. You’re stronger than this.” I repeated those words over and over a few times until I started to believe them.

And then I put the mirror back in place and put the car in drive.

I was moving forward, and for now, River Pierce could kiss my ass.

It had been three days since my run-in with River at the bar, and my new job started tomorrow, so this was my last official day off. My father had taken over his shifts at the bar, and I was officially done at Whiskey Falls. My dad was absolutely thrilled that I was staying in Magnolia Falls.

I hadn’t gone back to the bar because I had no intention of speaking to River. I didn’t know if he knew I was still in town, nor did I care at this point.

Well, that was a lie. I cared a little.

It was all I thought of, if I was being honest.

Dad was at the bar, and I was home alone. Demi, Saylor, and Peyton had all been texting me to see how I was, as they knew I’d decided to stay. I asked them not to share it when they’d all shown up at my house the morning after River had blasted me at the bar. They were equally pissed on my behalf and agreed he didn’t deserve to know what my plans were at this point.

He clearly didn’t trust me, and he obviously thought very little of me.

They were coming over here today with lunch to celebrate my last day off before I started the new job. It was sweet that they cared. I hadn’t told my father anything about what happened with River, as I’d become a pro at hiding my feelings.

The knock on the door startled me from my thoughts, and I opened it to three smiling faces.

“Last day before the new job starts,” Demi said, holding up a large bag from the Golden Goose and shaking it in front of me.

I hugged each one of them, and they came inside, setting up our food at the dining table.

“You look like hell. You can’t hide from him forever, you know.” Peyton pulled four bottles of water from the bag and passed them out.

“I’m not hiding from him. I just don’t want to see him because I still have a strong desire to kick him in the balls,” I admitted, and they all laughed.

Saylor handed us each a sandwich and a bag of chips, and we settled in our chairs.

“Romeo said River has been in a foul mood for days, and he’s been at home sick.” Demi unwrapped her turkey sandwich. She’d let me know that the night he’d left with Evie, nothing had happened, as he’d called the guys to come over right away.

But who knew what he was up to since then?

And why should I care?

I didn’t. I don’t. I won’t. I refuse to give him any energy at this point.

“He’s kind of always in a foul mood,” Peyton said when she finished chewing.

“I’ve known him my whole life,” Saylor said. “He’s always been a big grump, but if it’s any consolation, he was different with you.”

“I agree. It still doesn’t excuse what he did, but I think he acted out because he was jealous. And we still don’t know what the hell the sticky note thing is about, right?” Demi asked.

“No idea. It’s so him to tell me something on a sticky note and forget to give it to me. And then blame me for not knowing how he feels,” I ranted. “And… and… he accused me of fucking Dereck and lying about my relationship. He’s an even bigger asshole than I gave him credit for.”

“Sometimes people act out when they’re hurt. River doesn’t let anyone in long enough to be hurt by them, but I think he was different with you.” Saylor shrugged. “I’m not excusing what he did; I’m just trying to understand it.”

“He doesn’t get to have a meltdown and lose his shit on you and be excused. The man needs to grovel if he wants to be forgiven.” Peyton raised a brow.

“He doesn’t even know I’m here. He hasn’t texted or called, so I don’t think he cares. And frankly, neither do I,” I lied, and they all looked at me sympathetically, like they didn’t believe me.

And then Peyton took a swig of her water. “Good. Fuck River and his stupid sticky note and bullshit accusations.”

“Wow. Tell us how you really feel,” Demi said over her laughter.

“Hey, I did want to talk to you about something.” Saylor dabbed her mouth with her napkin when she finished chewing. “I’m looking for a house because I can’t live with my brother much longer. He’s hovering and acting like an overbearing parent. I know you want to move out of here and find a place. Would you want to be roommates?”

I’d never had a roommate. I’d lived with my father and had lived on my own ever since.

But something had changed in me since I’d come home. I didn’t want to be alone all the time anymore.

My family no longer felt like the small circle it had always been.

“Yes. Let’s do it. My lease is up on my apartment back in the city, and I’ve scheduled movers to bring everything back here, so I’ve got plenty of furniture to furnish a place.”

“Really? Yay. This is great. I found a few cute little houses on the water, not too far from here. Two bedrooms, lots of charm.” Saylor waggled her brows.

“This is so fun that you two will be living together. It’ll be our new hangout,” Peyton said.

“I can go look at a few places with you this weekend,” I said.

“Perfect. I’ll schedule some tours for us with my realtor. Just don’t tell my brother yet. He’ll start lecturing me about saving money. But I need my own space.”

“If you need to make more money, you can have more hours at Magnolia Beans if you want. Until you get the bookstore open, we can use all the help,” Demi said. She’d hired Saylor while she came up with her business plan to open the bookstore next to the coffee shop.

We made small talk for the next hour before they headed back to work. I looked online at the photos of the rentals Saylor had sent me so we could choose which ones to see this weekend.

I made my way to my bedroom to pick out my outfit for my first day of work tomorrow, and the unsigned contract was still lying on my desk.

I stared at it, hoping I hadn’t made a huge mistake. Dean Langston hadn’t taken the news all that well, and I doubted the door would be open for me there in the future.

I picked it up to tuck it into my desk drawer when a small yellow sticky note fell out. It must have been on one of the pages at the back of the contract. I picked it up off the floor and read it.

Or you could just stay here because I love you. Wild River.

My mouth fell open. Had he seriously proclaimed his love on a sticky note? Who does that?

River Pierce.

The man who never lets his guard down.

I knew he’d never told a woman that he loved them before.

So, even though this was the equivalent of breaking up with someone via text, it was a big move for River.

He’d told me that he loved me on a four-inch piece of paper that he stuck to a contract?

I was a weird mix of absolutely giddy and still fuming mad about the way he’d behaved with Dereck. He’d made it clear that he didn’t trust me.

But at the same time, I knew River. And in a weird way, I believed that his little outburst was his way of baring his soul and showing me exactly how much he cared. He wasn’t used to caring, and it made him feel vulnerable, and I truly believed that his ridiculous response was his knee-jerk reaction to feeling wounded.

But he sure as hell hadn’t gone about it the right way. And I was not going to make excuses for him, nor make it easy for him.

I opened the group chat with the girls.

I just solved the sticky note dilemma. He told me he loved me on a sticky note stuck to the back of the freaking contract.

Saylor

Swoon.

Demi

It’s kind of romantic.

Peyton

Lame. He should have manned up and told you to your face.

Demi

True. But at least you know how he feels. That’s big for River.

Well, calling me a cheating liar is low, even for him.

Saylor

You make some good points. But at least we don’t have to solve the mystery anymore. And he did admit that he loves you.

LOVED ME. Past tense.

I knew he loved me. But he’d hurt me, and I’d yet to get an apology. He hadn’t even reached out to try to make things right, regardless if he knew I was living here or not.

Demi

Hey, love by sticky note might be the new thing. Like standing outside someone’s window and telling them you love them. This is very modern, in a sweet way.

Peyton

Pull your head out of your ass, lover girl. He needs to grovel. Apologize. And not on a sticky note. Face-to-face. Man to man.

Saylor

She’s a woman.

Ummm… thank you?

Several memes and emojis followed, and I set my phone down, sat down on my bed, and stared at the sticky note.

I wanted to hate him.

But instead, I held that little piece of paper in my hand and pressed it to my chest. And I wished like hell that we could turn back time and do everything differently.

Because River Pierce loved me, and the truth was, I loved him, too.