13. TATE

13

TATE

"So, how bad is it?"

If it wasn't so devastating, I might have laughed at Wyatt's question. That he'd taken one look at me and instantly knew just how awful things were.

They all did.

All three of my brothers had barged into my office at the end of the workday today, and without giving me much of a choice in the matter, they'd demanded I join them for dinner.

"Work is done for the day," Cooper declared as they stormed inside.

"What?"

Wyatt had moved to grab my coat. He tossed it in my direction and said, "Let's go."

My brows pulled together, wondering what event had been planned that I'd forgotten about. For a fleeting moment, I realized just how possible that was, considering I'd been more than slightly distracted today. "Where are we going?"

"Out." Leave it to Liam to provide only the very basic of information.

"Out? Where? For what?"

With a proud smile on his face, Cooper crossed his arms over his chest. "Consider it a belated birthday celebration."

My body stiffened. "Uh, did you forget about last night? We sort of already celebrated."

"Yeah, that was with everyone else," Wyatt noted. "This is just for the four of us."

"Since when do we have a separate celebration?"

I already knew the reason they were doing this, but I hoped that by calling them out on it, they'd change their minds. I loved my brothers, but I wasn't exactly in any mood to be celebrating.

"Do you have other plans for tonight?" Cooper pressed, ignoring my question.

"No."

"Then we're leaving, and you're coming with us," Liam said. "Let's go."

He turned and walked out of my office. Cooper and Wyatt kept their eyes on me as they made to follow behind him.

I had no choice. They weren't going to let me out of it.

So, now I was here, sitting at a table at the restaurant with Wyatt, Cooper, and Liam, foolishly hoping they were going to avoid talking about the one thing I hadn't been able to stop thinking about all day long.

Ava.

Wyatt didn't need to offer any additional clarification to his question. I already knew what this was about. Even still, I countered, "How bad is what?"

"This is going to be a long night," Liam muttered.

"Don't play this game, Tate," Cooper ordered. "If you were anyone else, I might be able to buy that you have no clue what's going on. But I've known you your whole life. You know exactly why we're here."

I did.

I just didn't want to talk about it.

I hadn't quite come to grips with everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours.

More than anything else, I wished I could feel indifference. To not be impacted in the slightest by Ava being back. I would have easily settled for being able to go about my typical workday, being distracted by other things.

I would have much preferred that over the alternative. Because there wasn't a chance I could feel even a fraction of elation at Ava being back. I was far too disgusted by the whole situation to get anywhere close to that.

What I did feel was something entirely too foreign to me. If my brothers were fired up to deal with my issues, maybe I'd say this one thing, shock them, and we could all go home early.

But before I did that, I figured I'd give them one last chance to bow out of this discussion and shift it to something else. "Fine. But do you think you're all prepared to hear the truth?"

That question gave them all reason for pause. There was an edge of worry and trepidation in Wyatt's expression. Cooper looked like he was assessing me, attempting to figure out just how bad things could be. Liam looked bored—bored and irritated.

"Spit it out," my youngest brother demanded.

Fair enough.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," I advised them. "The majority of my night last night and all day today has been spent trying to come up with a plan."

"A plan?"

I nodded.

"For what?"

"To get Ava to feel what I feel."

Two sets of brows drew together with concern and curiosity. The third—Liam—sent me a look of defiance, like his thoughts were filled with judgment he didn't necessarily intend to share.

"Well, what is it that you feel?" Wyatt asked.

My eyes cut to his. "I'm pissed. I'm so angry at her for doing what she did for months."

"You had time to talk to her last night before dinner," Cooper noted. "Did she happen to clarify anything for you?"

I shook my head, feeling disgusted. "No."

"So, what happened?"

I thought back to last night. I recalled the feeling that moved through me the moment Liam had walked into the living room and told me that Ava was back. For someone who had seemed too hopeful yesterday, my brother was filled with irritation today.

Well, he could be miserable all he wanted. It wasn't going to change the way I felt. "She seemed to think it'd be okay to walk up and wish me a happy birthday."

"Do you think she was just trying to break the ice?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. Does it matter? She disappeared for what, twelve weeks? No contact, despite repeated attempts on my part to reach out to her."

"So, what did you say to her?"

"I made it clear that pretending everything was fine wasn't going to work. That only resulted in her seeming to believe that apologizing was the next best option."

"Are you saying it wasn't?"

My eyes narrowed. If this was all about my brothers wanting to take me out to make me feel better about the situation with Ava, they weren't doing a very good job of it.

"Why do I feel like I'm the one who's in the wrong here? She ignored me. For months. I didn't get a single ounce of communication from her after the wedding, where the relationship between us took a big turn toward something positive. Or so I thought. She ghosted me. Now, she wants to come back and expect everything to be fine. Unfortunately, that's not going to work for me."

"Did she say that?"

"Say what?"

"That she expects everything to just return to normal."

I shook my head. "She didn't have the chance to say that before I walked off. But it's obvious that's what she wants. I mean, she walked up and tried to hand me a gift. After all this time, that's how she wanted to do this. And let's think about it. All of you were just fine with her when she showed up. Nobody called her out for disappearing the way she did."

"I don't think anyone isn't curious about what she's been up to these last couple of months, Tate, but what did you expect us to do? It wasn't the time or the place to address any of that last night."

In all fairness to them, I had to take a step back and consider what that would have been like if everyone had responded the way I had. Because it had been uncomfortable for me.

While I enjoyed spending time with my family last night, my mind was distracted by Ava, just like it had been for months. We'd shared a handful of tense, awkward glances throughout the evening, and if that had been the way it was for everyone, nobody would have enjoyed themselves.

"She probably has more she wants to share with you," Wyatt reasoned. "We've known Ava for so long. I don't think she set out to hurt you."

"You say that like you believe I'm wounded," I noted.

"Aren't you?" He shrugged. "That's how I'd be with Rhea. If I was in love with her, finally took the steps to be with her, and she left without an explanation, not even a full day after I'd made that commitment to her, I'd be devastated. I'd have, as I'm sure you do, dozens of questions for her. I'd like to think that I could be rational enough to hear what she had to say for herself."

"I guess we're two different people, then."

Disappointment washed over him as he sat back in his chair. "I guess so."

"Why were you so worried?" Cooper chimed in.

"Worried about what?"

A gleam in his eye, like he believed he was about to put me in my place, Cooper explained, "You told us at the lake house that you held back from pursuing something with Ava because you were worried about what would happen to her and the relationship she has with this family if you acted on your feelings and things went south. It appears to me that you two barely got anywhere before things went south, and now you're sitting here, making it seem like you're upset we're trying to get you to see reason when it comes to her and this situation."

I winced.

Maybe Cooper had a reason to be so confident. He'd called me out on my hypocrisy.

I'd claimed to care so much about her, I'd kept myself from pursuing her for fear of her losing the people who loved her. And now, I was the one who couldn't be bothered to show her some understanding or even just a hint of compassion.

But even as the shame for how I'd acted toward her last night burned through me, I grappled with all that I'd suffered through for weeks. She left and gave no indication of her plan not to return. And when I called her, hoping to ease whatever concerns or fears she had, Ava ignored me.

Maybe it was my pride that refused to let me admit my mistake in this. I didn't know. But I looked Cooper square in the eye, leaned forward, and deadpanned. "She ghosted me."

He sighed and sat back in his seat, just like Wyatt had.

I wasn't finished. "Maybe there'd be a willingness to have some understanding if she'd made the effort to respond. She gave me nothing for weeks. Do you have any idea what I've gone through, hoping every time the phone rang that I'd see her name on the display? I think she needs to understand what that feels like—to have made a choice, to regret it, and to wish you could do something to change it but not have the chance."

"What makes you believe she doesn't already understand that? Damn, Tate, you're a man set on vengeance. For a guy who's brilliant at reading people and understanding them, that you think Ava had it in her to hurt you intentionally is mind blowing. You know that's not who she is. But you? You're setting out to hurt her in response, and that's not who I know you to be."

My jaw hurt from how badly I'd been clenching it. I wanted to get up and leave, to be alone and not have to face the fact that I had resorted to such measures. I'd been so caught up in the perceived slight against me, I couldn't think straight.

A vision of Ava standing in front of me last night with tears in her eyes flashed in my mind. She'd felt an overwhelming desperation to resolve things between us, to clear the air, and I shot her down.

How disgraceful. As much as I wanted to leave, I owed it to my brothers to stay. To stick around and assure them that they'd gotten through.

But just as I was about to do that, Liam spoke for the first time.

"She came back."

I was so caught off guard by his sudden interjection, I wasn't quite sure I'd even heard him correctly. "What?"

My brother wore a stony expression. "Do you know how fucking lucky you are, Tate? She came back. Yeah, maybe she went about this the wrong way and ghosted you for a couple of months. Maybe there's something to talk about and work out there, but she fucking came back. She's giving the both of you the opportunity to do that. Do you know what I would give to have that chance?"

I winced again.

Liam continued. "I see two people who made some wrong decisions for a long time. You're not blameless in this. And I'm not suggesting for even one second that Ava isn't responsible for some of the turmoil between the two of you. But wake the fuck up, Tate. You have a chance to fix it. You have a chance to make things right. And don't sit here pretending you don't care if that happens, because if there's one thing I know, it's that you love each other. If you let that go, if you walk away from that, you deserve to be miserable."

Liam's eyes cut away from mine as he stared off into the distance. The four of us sat there in silence, my gaze eventually dropping to the table in embarrassment.

I was such an idiot.

The tension was so thick around the table, not even Cooper or Wyatt were willing to speak. Liam had claimed so often that he was okay, but it was clear he was being eaten alive by what he'd been through.

I didn't think there was a way I'd ever be able to fix things for him. But maybe, at the very least, I could not waste the opportunity I had to find something special.

When I lifted my gaze again, I said, "You're right." Liam focused his attention back on me. "With the way I'm acting right now, I deserve to be miserable." There was an unmistakable feeling of heaviness in my chest, an ache at the back of my throat. "I've been consumed by bitterness for so long. I think back on the way I spoke to her last night, and I don't even recognize the person I've become."

"Fix it." Liam's eyes were pleading with mine. "Just fix it."

My shoulders relaxed as I nodded my agreement. Then my eyes moved through my three brothers. Following a beat of silence, I asked, "Any suggestions on how to make that happen?"

With his chin held high and a knowing grin on his face, Cooper said, "Well, I guess I can help here, little brother. I'll tell you everything you need to know about getting in your lady's good graces. I should know."

"You?" Wyatt scoffed. "I'm the one who's married. I think I'm more of an expert on this subject."

"Bullshit. Rhea hated your guts when you first met her," Cooper fired back. Then he tipped his head to the side, his eyes narrowing slightly. "On that thought, maybe you should take the lead on this. I don't know so much about dealing with a woman scorned. Skye loved me from the moment she laid her eyes on me."

Wyatt rolled his eyes. "Shut up."

Cooper laughed.

I laughed.

Liam chuckled and shook his head.

That's when I let out a deep sigh of relief, grateful to my older brothers for finding a way to ease the tension.

And then things turned serious again as Wyatt said, "Persistence is key."

As he went on to share what he believed I needed to know to win over Ava's heart again, I listened intently, feeling the best I had in a very long time.