11. Briar

A signthat read Metal Salvage and Parts hung crookedly over a chain-link gate topped with spirals of barbed wire.Just past the barren, red-dirt entrance lay a jagged landscape of huge metal carcasses.The sky was bright blue and hot, bleaching the bones of the discarded machinery that cluttered every corner of the property, and the iron tang of grease was everywhere. Briar liked the smell. It mingled with the earthy fresh air, peculiar but somehow pleasing.

He stood at the gate, clutching Princess Sparkle"s leash in a sweaty fist, and took a few deep breaths to calm his racing heart.The puppy whined and tugged at her leash with surprising force, wriggling in ecstasy at the scent of home.She'd come through her treatment like a champ and gained enough weight to yank him off his feet when he wasn"t paying attention.She was still an odd-looking mutt, but Briar had fallen in love with her sweet temperament.

He twitched and fiddled, frittering away the time by dusting off his jeans and making sure the clinic van was locked.Like anyone would pull a smash and grab out here on the side of a godforsaken mountain.He wasted so much time that even the dog began to look embarrassed for him.

It had been almost a week since that disastrous kiss.

Derek had barely spoken to him the next morning when he dropped Briar off at his apartment, and they hadn't crossed paths since.That alone was strange. In a town the size of Sweetwater, Briar should have at least caught a glimpse of him at the gas pump.But there'd been no sign of him.He hadn't even answered his phone when Briar called with an update on Princess.The calls went straight to voicemail.

But Briar had never been the kind of guy to take a hint.So, he borrowed Nate's van and trundled the puppy up the mountain to her grumpy owner.He'd even tied a pink ribbon to her collar for the occasion.She was so cute and so happy, she'd win over even the coldest heart—and Briar didn't think Derek's heart was cold.Not when his kiss was so hot.

Briar had been turning that kiss over in his head every waking minute.Even in his wildest dreams, he'd never seen it coming.Sure, he'd toyed with the idea of a little flirtation.He was only human, after all, and Derek was stunningly attractive even without being what people would call handsome.But even Briar wasn"t foolish enough to expect more than that.

Derek was living life as a straight man.Not just straight—intensely straight.Nate assured him that there had never been even a hint of Derek looking twice at another man.

But straight men didn't just go around kissing other men.Not even pretty ones like Briar.Not without a hell of a lot of alcohol first, and Derek had obviously been sober as a judge.

The skillful, unyielding pressure of Derek"s mouth as he coaxed Briar"s lips apart had unleashed a torrent of emotions.Briar had never felt anything like it, not even when he"d fooled himself into believing he was in love with Dax.He couldn"t put a name to the feeling, but it was raw and vicious and somehow intensely sweet all at the same time.

In the past, he"d always fallen for cocky, fun, loud types.Guys like Aiden. Little more than overgrown boys in the bodies of men.Who knew that he also had a weakness for tall, dark, and broody?Derek wasn"t some immature bad boy; he was something much more dangerous.He was a complex, intelligent man who tugged at Briar like a magnet despite his reservations.A man whose history, whatever it may be, caused Nate to grimace in distaste whenever he was mentioned.Just a flicker of a glimpse behind his defenses, and Briar had already fallen—hard.Brutally, terribly hard.

When the thud came, it might just kill him.

But hope springs eternal, so here he was.Even if he got tossed out on his ass, he wanted to know every shadow, every scar, every story behind what made a man like Derek tick.

The property was a haphazard maze of machinery and parts, stacked higher than his head in most places.He wondered what it must be like to work in such bleak surroundings every day.It must take tremendous mental fortitude.Briar would go crazy after a single day.

He found Derek at the back of the property, breaking down a hulking pile of crushed vehicles with a massive sledgehammer.Sweat poured off him despite the mild day, soaking his white t-shirt until it was nearly see-through.The cotton clung to his muscled back every time he swung the hammer.The sharp clang was steady and ceaseless, nearly in sync with Briar's pounding heart.

Then Derek tossed the hammer aside and reached down to rip a mangled fender from its frame with his bare hands.

Briar bent down and scooped Princess into his trembling arms.She squirmed, dragging him down with her weight, but he just held on tight, suddenly in desperate need of the comfort of something to hug.

He didn't make a sound, but Derek must have sensed that he wasn't alone.His shoulders tensed and he paused, barely turning his head to glance over his shoulder.

"What do you want?" he growled.

His voice was rough, but that didn't necessarily mean he was irritated.It might have been caused by the dust.That's what Briar told himself, anyway.It was the only way he could find the courage to speak.

"I brought her back," he announced, hoisting the puppy up high and getting whacked in the face by her tail.She yipped happily, doing her level best to leap out of his arms and straight into Derek's.Not that Briar blamed her. That's where he'd rather be, too.

Derek's jaw tensed. "I told you.I don't want her."

"Oh, don't give me that crap!" Briar exploded, fed up."She's your responsibility."

Derek's gaze drilled into him, so furious that the stunning green of his eyes looked like it was glowing.

"Responsibility?"Derek echoed, voice dripping with a dangerous mix of rage and sarcasm."You want to lecture me on responsibility, Briar?"

Briar's chest tightened. It wasn't unusual for his big mouth to get him in trouble, but it could usually be counted on to smooth things over again.He didn't think that was an option this time.

The look on Derek's face was terrible.

Nate hadn't told him much about Derek's past, and Briar hadn't asked.He didn't want another lecture.But that hadn't stopped the gossips around town from spilling everything.

Briar knew that Derek had worked like a dog his whole life to keep the rest of his family out of poverty.He'd never been to high school.Never left Sweetwater. Never had a relationship except for one ill-suited attempt as a teenager that ended with a miscarriage and what sounded like a boatload of drama. Softer emotions probably scared the hell out of him.

"You took her in," he repeated lamely."You made her love you. You can't just abandon her because she got hurt."

"It's got nothing to do with that."

"Then you can't ditch her just because it got complicated!"

Derek stepped closer, and it took all of Briar's self-discipline not to back away.

"Complicated?" Derek scoffed, chest heaving.Sweat dripped down his forehead and into his eyes, but he didn't even blink.Somehow, that made him seem even more superhuman."Kid, you've got no idea what complicated even looks like.Complicated is stealing from the collection plate at church. Complicated is this."

He dug his phone out of his back pocket and tossed it.Briar grabbed it out of the air one-handed.Princess slipped from his arms and took off, scrabbling at Derek's legs and begging for attention.

Derek looked down at her, and then deliberately looked away.

Confused, Briar glanced at the unlocked phone.Alerts filled the screen, one after another, a litany of missed calls and texts.

Susan:The van broke down again.Can you fix it?

James:Nadine's recital is on Tuesday.I know you hate those things, but you gotta be there, bro.

Bethie:Is the check in the mail?School doesn't pay for itself.I wish! Hahaha. XoXo.

Mom:Can you pick up the roast for Sunday dinner?Your father isn't feeling well enough to drive me.

West:Stop ignoring me. We've got to talk about this.

The last message caught Briar's attention.

"What's wrong with West?" he asked worriedly."He's not in trouble because of the fight, is he?Nate said nobody was pressing charges."

"You don't need to worry about him," Derek said icily.He took the phone and pocketed it without glancing at the screen."That's my job. Get it? I don't have time for strays."

Briar glanced down at Princess as she pawed at a discarded piece of metal, but he had the sinking feeling Derek's barb was meant for him.

He flushed with indignation. "I'm not a stray."

"Could've fooled me."

"Oh, my God!" Briar plunked his hands on his hips, exasperated."Can you not be an unbelievable asshole for just a minute?You're acting like this because of the kiss, right?I get it. It was just a kiss, okay?You're still as straight as you want to be.You don't need to come at me like this."

Derek's nostrils flared, and his voice dropped to a whisper that was cold as steel."You think you've got me all figured out, huh?"

Gravel crunched under his boots as he stepped closer, and Briar's throat went dry.They were standing too close now.He could feel Derek's heat. Smell his sweat.Practically taste the electricity buzzing between them.

He swallowed hard, forcing himself to meet those intense green eyes.

"I don't," he confessed, unable to subdue the tremor in his voice.He searched Derek's face, close enough now to see the fine lines of exhaustion around his eyes and mouth.It looked as if he'd been working himself to the bone since Briar had last seen him."I don't have you figured out at all, but I want to.No man's an island, right? You've got to let someone in eventually."

"Not you," Derek said stonily.

"Why not me?" Feeling daring, Briar pushed his limits by stepping just that little bit further until their chests were practically touching.It felt as if the world belonged to only them.The rusted-out relics closed in on them, shielding them from the outside.Shielding them from consequences.Princess whined, anxious in the charged atmosphere.

The battle inside Derek was palpable.His breathing was heavy.

"You kissed me," Briar said boldly."You want me."

"You don't get to decide what I want." Derek's tone was frigid.

"Okay," he said agreeably. "Then you tell me.What do you want?"

"I want to be left alone!" Derek's jaw flexed, and a vein in his temple throbbed.He reached out and grabbed Briar by the biceps, giving him a hard shake."For once in my goddamn life, I want to go a day without someone else telling me what they want, what they need, what my responsibility is.You can take that word and fucking choke on it."

He grabbed Briar by the throat, and for a split second, Briar was terrified.But Derek didn't choke him. He didn't hurt him.Briar was starting to think he wasn't the type of man who would ever willingly hurt someone.Instead, he dragged Briar forward and slammed their mouths together.

It was sudden and frightening, but the thought of protest never entered his mind.It felt too good. Derek's kiss was a searing clash of teeth and tongues.Every ounce of anger, confusion, and longing they felt poured through that single, searing connection.It felt like getting swallowed by a black hole, pulled and twisted by a gravity so powerful he could no longer tell which way was up.

Intense, overwhelming desire flooded straight to his dick, which began to throb painfully.Briar whimpered and wrapped his arms around Derek's neck.His fingers dug into Derek's hair, clinging to the sweat-damp locks.If he could have climbed Derek like a tree, he would have.

Check that; he did.

Derek's hands were at his waist, lifting him, and Briar's legs wrapped around him like a vise.Derek was strong enough to hold him up just like that, without anything to brace his weight against.It was the sexiest thing Briar had ever experienced.

He was hard. They both were. Derek's cock pressed directly against the most sensitive place between Briar's thighs.It felt huge. Deliciously, terrifyingly large, just like the rest of the man.

Briar never had a size kink, but that changed in an instant.He groaned; he couldn't help himself.

The sound was like a bucket of ice water crashing over them.

Derek ripped their mouths apart with a vicious curse.

"Jesus Christ," he said raggedly, hot breath gusting across Briar's temple.

His fingers were clenched around the backs of Briar's thighs, biting deep into the flesh, and his whole giant body seemed to be trembling.But he didn't drop him. Instead, Derek wrapped one arm around Briar's waist and held him while he very deliberately reached back to unlock Briar's arms from his neck.Then he did the same with his legs.

Briar might have helped, but he still hadn't regained conscious control of his motor function.He slid down Derek's body like a limp noodle, forced to lean on him for balance even after his feet touched the ground.

The air was so thick and heavy that he couldn't catch his breath.

He'd hoped to maybe taunt Derek into another kiss, knowing that it was more likely to end in him getting tossed out on his ass, but he'd never expected this.The sheer intensity between them left him stunned.

When he finally had the strength to lift his head and meet Derek's gaze, the look in his eyes was so violent Briar flinched.

"Derek," he began, voice shaking, "I didn't—I mean, I hoped but—look, I honestly didn't come here for…whatever that was.I swear. I brought Princess home because I thought it might help.She needs you, but I think you need her more."

Derek's expression grew strangely flat and remote.Did he have a shut-off valve inside? It didn't seem human. Still, he made sure Briar was steady on his feet before stepping back.

"Just take her and go," he said roughly.

"Why are you like this?" Briar asked, heart sinking.

"Because I have to be." Derek snapped."Nothing good ever comes from being selfish.I'm not gay. I won't be gay. I won't do that to my family."

"You…w-what?" Briar sputtered."Your brother is married to a man!"

"Yeah, he is." There was something dark in his voice that raised the hair on the back of Briar'sneck."It was hell on all of us once our mother foundout about him.He never even had to come outofficially.All it took was her catching him with some gay porn—my porn—and she was never the sameagain.She had us all watching over him day and night, making sure he didn't end up dead in a fieldsomewhere.My folks have been through the wringer oncealready.I won't do it to ‘emagain."

"That's archaic!"

Derek shrugged, unconcerned, as if Briar's opinion meantnothing.Less than nothing. But Briar couldn't just give up, not with the taste of Derek still in hismouth.

"You can't just pretend there's nothing between us," he protested,flabbergasted.

"There's not a damn thing between us," Derek saidflatly."Never will be. Now take the dog andleave."

They stood there, standing off against each other, both too stubborn to breakfirst.Briar was forced to tip his head back to properly glare at him, but it had all the impact of facing off against a brickwall.Derek had retreated behind an impassivefa?ade.There was no reaching him. Nottoday.Maybe never. He'd just ripped Briar's world apart and torched it with a single kiss, and he acted like nothing hadhappened.

Briar drew one long, even breath and let it outslowly.He gave a stiff nod, then bent down and scooped up the leash trailing in the dirt behindPrincess.His shaking limbs barely obeyed him, but at least his knees didn'tbuckle.

"Okay," he said, clutching the leash to his chest and slowly backingaway."I get it. I guess I just figured you had thicker skin thanthis.I didn't peg you asinsecure.There's no need to run away from how something makes youfeel."

Derek's eyes were ice cold. "What I feel or don't feel is none of yourbusiness."

Briar sputtered. "Fine."

"Fine." Derek's smile wasruthless.

"Fine!"

Briar turned on his heel and marched briskly toward thegate.Princess trotted beside him, whining and casting longing glances behind them every fewseconds.

Briar couldn't blame her. He felt the sameway.Every atom in his body was pulling at him to goback.Even after he started up the van and screamed into his steering wheel, he couldn't resist taking a quick glance in his rearview mirror, vainly hoping to catch one last glimpse ofDerek.

But Derek wasn't there.

He hadn't even bothered to watch himleave.