Chapter Thirty-Eight

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

NOW PLAYING: THE Night Does Not Belong To God- Sleep Token

Coffee has never been my favorite but my lack of sleep calls for a well doctored cup to survive our day-long bus trip. I am in desperate need of a distraction from the chaos thrumming through all of our bonds. Omen’s truth shook our foundation. We’re running on fumes, the strain between us barreling toward a tipping point.

With several weeks to go on the West Coast portion of our tour, I can’t shake the worry my pack will fall apart soon.

Nexus stumbles out of the bedroom in a pair of low-slung sweatpants. A sight my lower half usually perks up seeing. With the days-old stubble and dark bruising beneath my alpha’s eyes, arousal can’t compete with concern. He’s taken Omen’s absence the hardest. Even going so far as to close off his bond so we aren’t drowning in his grief and guilt.

“G’morning,” he mumbles, pressing a quick kiss to my cheek. He grabs a mug from above my head and turns to pour himself a cup of coffee.

My eyes are wide when he turns to face the living room, showing me the scratches marring his back. None of us have felt up to being intimate since we learned Omen was Sarah Montgomery. So how–I reach out a finger, running along one of the thin lines and he freezes. He isn’t even breathing as I murmur his name. Confusion and pain fill my voice, my thoughts running rampant with ideas of where he could have gotten them. Of who could have given them to him.

Before I can ask him about them, the sound of Omen’s name from the television distracts us both. Nexus steps closer to where Titan is half asleep on the couch. I move to his side and watch in horror as a news story plays revealing the controversial discovery of Pastor Montgomery’s hidden omega daughter. A picture of Omen standing in the wings of the stage at our show in Boston is shown beside a picture of her as Sarah when she was several years younger.

My heart sinks realizing whoever drugged her at the festival most likely already knew who she was. They targeted her. But why use a heat inducer?

The screen changes and a growl rattles from Nebula’s throat when Grant Montgomery appears. “Pastor Montgomery, were you aware your daughter presented as an omega and was hiding under the alias Omen Powell?”

“Sarah ran away several years ago, tempted by the sin those in organizations like the Designation Underground promote. She has turned her back on God and on her family. It saddens us to learn her depravity has led her toward the arms of the devil. Had she stayed home she would have found grace in the sanctity of our church and a husband to help guide her away from the debauchery of pack life she seems to be chasing.” The Pastor somehow manages to imbue his voice with sorrow, but his bright green eyes hold the depth of his true feelings on the subject–hatred.

The news anchors stick to the topic for a few more minutes before turning to a strike outside of one of the country's biggest tech-developing firms. Nexus is practically vibrating beside me. His fear and anger leak down our bond even with his end closed off.

“Nex,” I murmur, placing my palm on his arm to try to comfort him. He shrugs me off and storms to the back of the bus.

“What the fuck happened to your back?” Nebula roars when he sees the scratches on our mate's skin.

Nexus stills, his head hung and his shoulders heaving with each heavy breath he takes. He’s out of control, his pheromones leaking into the air around him in crashing waves. We’re a ticking bomb in close quarters. I need to do something to de-escalate the situation before things turn violent.

“Unlike the three of you, I didn’t leave our omega to suffer alone through her heat.”

No one’s breathing. The weight of his words crushing on our chests as we realize he hadn’t just needed time to himself. He lied to us and went to Omen. Agony slices deep and quick through our bonds before Nebula growls long and low. “You fucked my sister’s murderer?”

I glance between the two of them, knowing even I cannot salvage the situation we’ve found ourselves in. When my eyes turn to Titan, I find him watching me. He doesn’t seem surprised, only resigned. “You knew?” I whisper. He nods. His expression turns pleading before he turns in shock to look at Nexus.

“Elizabeth wasn’t murdered! She committed suicide!” Nexus screams. With a single blink, Nebula dives across the coffee table. His hand wraps around Nexus’ throat, slamming him against the wall. Nebula stumbles back in shock when Nex’s fist slams into his cheek.

The beat of my heart accelerates, the rapid sound filling my ears with a whooshing noise. The same reaction I always have to shows of aggression. I have to stop them. I step closer, ready to intervene but Titan jumps from the couch and holds me back. “They need to work this out, Cal. If it goes too far I’ll step in.” I trust Tee to separate them, but I hate the idea of watching them fight. I turn my back and head toward the front of the bus. We need to find somewhere to pull over so they can cool off.

“Benjamin Montgomery rejected Liz and worsened her depression, but he didn’t kill her. She made that decision herself. My heart fucking aches for what you went through watching her succumb to her mental illness, Nebula, and I sincerely hope karma gives that asshole what he deserves, but Liz’s rejection? Her death? Omen had nothing to do with those decisions. She was fucking fifteen and living in a different state. She never even met your sister. So why the fuck are you blaming her for something completely outside of her control? You think she chose to be related to the Montgomerys? To have a psychopathic, anti-designation asshole of a father?”

“Every single member of that stupid fucking family is the same!” Nebula shouts back in Nexus’ face. Both alphas are quickly growing unstable, their anger edging them toward ferality.

A sigh of relief slips through my lips when I feel the bus begin to turn. Hopefully, we’re at a rest stop and can get these two away from each other for a bit.

“She fucking ran from them! Did you even stop to consider asking her why? Or are you too chicken shit to find out?”

Nebula’s fist connects with Nexus’ ribs. Furniture is pushed when they crash into it. Things clatter to the floor, but even the shattering of cups can’t drown out the sound of flesh slamming against bone. “Tee,” I beg, letting my eyes slip closed. My heart is breaking into pieces watching the two of them hurt each other.

I never wanted a life surrounded by violence, something they both know, and yet I’m forced to watch them fight. Everything feels numb, my thoughts slipping far away to avoid the scene before me. Tears soak my cheeks and my body wracks with violent shivers. There’s no escape when their pain radiates down our bond.

Frustration eats at my determination to remain neutral in the divide between my alphas. Fear for Omen’s safety eating away at the edges of my mind. They’re so focused on hurting each other they haven’t realized the implications of the news broadcast. My starlight’s family knows who she is now. They can find her. Track her down and drag her back to New Hampshire. What torture awaits her there?

“You chose a liar over your mates?” I hear Nebula growl followed by the sound of someone slamming to the floor. My eyes snap open to see Titan wrestling Nebula away from where Nexus lies on the floor. His lip is split and bleeding, his jaw already starting to swell.

“Ha.” Nex coughs. “I chose you. Left her as soon as the heat broke. A decision I have regretted every moment since.” His eyes slipped closed seconds before I’m drowning in a deluge of guilt, doubt, self-loathing, anger, and remorse. Nexus’ bond is open and the overwhelming battering of his emotions nearly sends me to my knees. He’s been keeping all of this locked away. Suffering through this pain alone.

“I thought I made the right decision,” he whispers brokenly. “Believed if I came home and we went back out for the tour I could reach you. Help you see the reality you’ve been avoiding since you found out who she is. But you won’t listen. I can’t even say her name without you shutting the entire conversation down.”

A vicious growl vibrates from Nebula’s chest. His hurt worn like a shield to hide the twinge of doubt in his bond. “We all agreed that omega was a thing of the past.”

“No, Nebula, we didn’t agree. You made that decision and I was forced to follow along. You made sure none of us could reach her on our phones. You told her to never contact us again through our Fated connection.” Nexus stands and steps close to Nebula again. A galaxy of pain swirls in his mocha eyes, clear for all of us to see. “She’s our Fate-sent omega and you’ve tossed her aside like our connection means nothing. A decision you made without ever stopping to ask any of us what we want.”

Nexus backs up then, brushing the blood off of his face with his hands. He stops at the archway to the back section of the bus and looks back at each of us. “Her identity was leaked to the media so the ‘family’ she’s been hiding from can find her now. We don’t even know if she’s safe. Live in denial longer Neb, one day you’ll see the truth. I just hope you haven’t driven us all away by then.”

Nebula deflates when the bathroom door clicks closed. Titan drops his hold on our alpha mate and looks at me. He nods toward the bathroom before he places a hand on Nebula’s shoulder and steers him to the exit. “The bus isn’t moving, let’s go for a walk and cool off.”

After they leave, I knock on the bathroom door, gently pushing it open and stepping inside. Nexus is at the sink with the first aid kit open on the small counter. I push him to sit on the closed toilet and carefully clean his split lip. He’ll also need an ice pack to help take the swelling out of his jaw. Our makeup artist Aurora is going to be grumpy tonight when she sees the state his face is in.

“I’m sorry, songbird,” he mumbles. When his warm hands wrap around mine, I realize how badly I’ve been shaking. “I’m so sorry.”

I pull him against me, careful not to press the left side of his face against my chest. “I know, Alpha. I get it. I only wish you’d confided in me too.”

He shakes his head, wincing when he hits his lip. “You already feel like you’re tearing apart trying to hold us all together, I didn’t want to add to your burden.”

I blow out a breath and run my nails across his scalp. Being the peacekeeper in a broken pack is more stressful than anything I’ve ever faced. It might be time to take a page out of my little brother’s book and start making decisions for myself instead of worrying about everyone else’s feelings. Maybe then I can save my pack from the destruction awaiting us on the horizon.

I leave Nexus in the bathroom to cool off in the shower and return to the living room. I’ve just finished reorganizing the first aid kit in anticipation of Nebula’s return when I feel it: the same energy I’ve spent so long hoping to feel caressing my skin. Like standing beneath a midsummer sun and basking in the gentle breeze carrying the faintest hint of something sweet in the distance. My entire existence ignites with the faintest touch. Illuminating all the dark hollow places I work so hard to keep hidden. I watch with rapt attention as words appear on the inside of my left forearm.

‘I know your pack doesn’t wish to hear from me, but I also understand how instincts work. So I wanted to reassure you that Lex and I went dark as soon as the DAU caught wind the articles were being published. I’m safe.’

I sit on the edge of the couch waiting for more. For something I can’t name. An apology maybe? No, that doesn’t feel right.

When no other message is communicated, I grab a pen and respond. I need to know if the Omen we met and fell for is who she really is. Or if Sarah Montgomery was pretending to be someone else all along.

‘Did any of the time we spent together mean anything to you? -C’

It’s only a few seconds before my arm tingles with her energy again.

‘It meant everything.’

My teeth worry my bottom lip as I stare at the words. I contemplate writing more but am stopped when I hear Nebula and Titan returning. I will the message away before they reach the top of the steps. I still have a multitude of questions for my starlight, but knowing she’s safe takes a weight off of my shoulders.

Titan sees me waiting to tend Nebula’s wounds and sends him to sit on the couch. As he sits beside me, the bathroom door opens and Nexus steps out. They both avoid looking at each other, but I can feel their pain and worry in our bonds. I call out when Nex turns to go to the back. He pauses and looks over his shoulder.

“Omen’s safe. The DAU heard about the article before it went live and got her to a safe house.” Nebula turns my way in disbelief, but I shrug off the pulse of guilt his expression brings me.

“How do you know?” Titan asks.

“She wrote to me using our bond while you were outside. She knew our instincts wouldn’t react well to the thought of her in danger and reached out to quell those fears.”

“Thank you, songbird,” Nexus murmurs numbly. His expression isn’t quite as tense as he turns back to the bedroom, but I know her safety is only one of his many concerns.

Settling on the edge of the coffee table, I grab Nebula’s hand to clean his bloodied knuckles. The fingers of his other hand encircle my wrist to stop me. “Did you write back?” Midnight blue eyes search my own dual-colored orbs. I lightly touch his bond to get a taste of his anguish. His uncertainty.

“The DAU moved her to a safe house within minutes of hearing her identity was going to be leaked. She’s been hiding from them for… well we don’t know the answer to that yet. Years. At least since she presented as an omega. I understand why you reacted the way you did, Alpha. Grant Montgomery is a blight on this world who deserves a Fate worse than our justice system could ever offer him. And his son has been brainwashed into acting exactly like his father, only without the cult following the Pastor has.”

I set the box of medical supplies aside and grip his face in my hands, careful not to irritate the bruises blooming there. “To answer your question, yes I did respond.” He flinches and tries to pull away, but I keep my grip on his head firm to force him to keep meeting my eyes. “We all have questions about Omen’s past. Her choice to hide who she is and what we are to her. I want answers, Nebula. I want to know who Omen Powell is when she isn’t forced to hide so many parts of herself from the world.”

“And what happens if she’s like them? If she lies again?” Nebula snaps. I let him pull away this time, knowing he needs the space. “I don’t think I will ever be able to see her as anything but a Montgomery.”

“I know,” I nod. “Try not to be hard on Nexus about his feelings for her. He’s able to see things from a perspective you can’t.”

“I’ll try.” I accept his promise and get to work cleaning his wounds.

We all startle when footsteps come stomping up the stairs a few minutes later. Brady takes one look at Nebula’s bruised body and sighs. His arms cross over his chest and stands tall, the weight of his presence making him feel like a looming mountain. “You four need to get your shit together. I saw Omen on the news and now I have an idea of what happened between the five of you to cause her to quit, but I won’t put up with fighting. Work it out peacefully or ride on separate buses.” He doesn’t give us a chance to respond, he just turns and leaves. “We’re wheels up in five,” he yells before the door closes behind him.

I don’t know where we will go from here, or how my pack will survive these cracks in our bonds. Whatever we decide, it’s clear this isn’t going to be easy for any of us.