13. Halo

"So, you realize if you bang her, you and your dad will have done sisters?" Switch says from our spot against the bar as Lola's birthday party plays out around us.

I tear my eyes away from Arianne. More to the point, I tear my eyes away from the way that tight jersey skirt skims her tanned thighs and makes her butt look like something I wanna bite.

Or perhaps I've just spent too much time with Saint, the club's biggest ass-biter according to Gwen who shares shit from the girls' group chat with Clutch.

The more time I spend around Ari, the more I wonder how the hell she and Mercy are related. Mercy was all shock and awe. Ballsy confidence. A manipulative streak.

Arianne, on the other hand, is quiet. Playful when she's not terrified. Scared of taking up space. Even now, she stands on the periphery of a conversation between Gwen, Rae, and Viola. I see her looking around furtively, and I know what she's doing.

Because I do it all the time.

She's checking for exits. Hyper-vigilance starts in lots of ways. War. Abusive families. Always looking for the perceived threat that I want to make sure never comes for her.

"What?" I ask.

Switch tips his head in Arianne's direction. "Arianne. Your dad slept with Mercy. You sleep with Arianne. Wrinkle would have found it funny."

I huff. "Dad was a dirty bastard. He'd have tried to fuck Arianne too."

"You ever bang Mercy?"

"No. Although she always made sure I knew she'd ditch Dad in a heartbeat for me. Shoved her hands down my jeans once. It'd be known as sexual assault if I'd done that to a woman." I face Switch. "What's with all the questions about my love life, anyway?"

He grins like he knows what he's doing to me. "Just curious how far this sister-love thing goes."

Brandon, one of the prospects, keeps checking out Arianne's ass as he walks by. There's been no sign of interest or even acknowledgment by Arianne. She hasn't responded to him at all. Yet.

There's something about Brandon that rubs me the wrong way. We get a lot of people who think they're tough enough to be an outlaw. They start as hang arounds so we can get to know them. If we think they have a future, we invite ‘em to be prospects. If they survive the tests they have to go through, they get invited to be a brother.

I don't know what it is about Brandon that bothers me. Maybe it's because none of us saw Noah as a spy. And we totally missed Saint being undercover. But I'm suspicious of every fucker around us now.

And Brandon perhaps the most.

Bikers have a code. People might not like it, but we do. I'm not sure Brandon wants to live within it.

Mac, Iris's service dog, whines. I glance over and see Iris is holding on to Lola's fingers while she bounces on the floor near him. Lola's been pulling herself up on the sofa, the edge of the kitchen stools, even my leg. Spark is sitting next to Iris, his long legs outstretched, a beer bottle in his hand, his palm cupping the back of her neck. He's massaging it firmly, occasionally tugging on her hair. Every now and then, Iris looks up with pink cheeks and gives him a knowing stare.

It's rare I feel a twinge of envy for that kind of domestic setup, but to find a woman who accepts you fully as you are, who's willing to let you lead, who'll have your child and take care of your place and give you some softness to come home to is a rare jewel.

Once in a blue moon, I find myself thinking that might be nice, but the thoughts pass quickly. But it's the second time I've thought about what Spark and Iris have recently.

The age difference between Spark and Iris is similar to me and Ari. Fuck. I shake my head. There is no me and Ari.

"I think I might see if she wants to grab dinner with me one night," Switch says.

I snap my head in his direction. "You what?"

He tips his chin towards Arianne, then looks her up and down like she's a T-bone cooked to perfection. "Arianne. Might take her out for dinner, especially if she'll wear that skirt for me."

"I'm paying her to look after Lola."

Switch scoffs. "What's that got to do with her having dinner with me? You're not paying her for twenty-four seven service. Because I'm sure that's illegal."

"Fuck off looking at her like that."

Switch laughs, then tips his head back and drains the rest of the whiskey in his glass. "I was just messing with you. I think you're going to."

"You think I'm going to what?"

"Sleep with her. I'll put five hundred bucks down that you do."

"Fuck off." Even as I say it, my thoughts go back to the bedroom, my fingers sliding in and out of her tight, slick cunt. It took all my self-control to not bury my face between her legs, licking and sucking on her clit until she came in my arms.

And let's not even think about the way she fell apart. Tits quivering, back arching in a way that made me think about how her back would look when I fucked her from behind.

IfI fucked her from behind.

Which I'm not going to.

Switch laughs. "You got hungry eyes for her. And I saw the way they narrowed at Brandon. There's no way you aren't banging that in the next thirty days."

My mind goes back to the shower. I knew for maybe the last ten seconds she was there. My brain took over, imagining her slipping out of those pajamas, falling to her knees in front of me, and offering that pretty mouth of hers to do whatever I liked with it. Which in my dirty mind consisted of some serious deep throat, then coming on her face and tits.

I don't tell him about the moment in the bedroom or the bathroom. I feel like I'm on a collision course with Arianne every time I'm in her orbit. Maybe the loss of some cash will help reinforce that me and her are absolutely not in Lola's best interests.

"Make it ten grand."

Switch coughs and splutters. "Jesus, you must be really concerned you're going to end up railing her. I'll take the ten grand."

"Asshole."

"Are we talking hole preferences, or are you just mad I called you out?"

I glance at Switch. "Is there no one you can be stitching up or something?"

"If anybody gets that injured today, we're doing a little girl's first birthday party all wrong."

Rae walks by me, a grin on her face. Her hair is up, but it wasn't ten minutes ago. "We should probably do cake soon."

King turns the corner into the bar, still fixing the buckle on his belt, and suddenly it all makes sense. My prez has been banging his old lady, a detail I didn't need to know.

"Cake sounds good," I manage to say. "Thanks so much for helping pull this together," I say as King reaches us and slips his hands around Rae's waist, kissing the side of her neck. "Prez, can I have a word?"

"Is it club business?" he asks.

I nod. "Yeah, I just need twenty minutes of?—"

"Not today." King shakes his head. "Today is a celebration of life."

Anger starts to swirl. It's like a flash fire, taking hold. I look around the bar. Men are drunk, laughing. Women are chatting. Kids are running around the clubhouse, and we're at a birthday party for a one-year-old who won't even know if she had a party or not.

"These people are at risk," I say before grinding my jaw.

King's face hardens. "And I said not now. Everyone is safe here."

"For now." I step away and head to my room. I need a minute to calm myself.

One second.

One breath.

One second.

Another breath.

"Halo?" It's Penny. The club girls keep a wide berth when the old ladies are around. Most of the men are loyal to their old ladies, and their women don't like being reminded of pussy they dipped into.

My breathing slows, my heart rate drops a little, and Penny smiles. "What's up, Pen?"

"I know this is hard for you," Penny says. "It must be hard parenting when you don't actually want to be one. When the responsibility is thrust upon you, born out of a tragedy you also need time to process."

"You got a point, Penny?" I say, and immediately feel bad for the equivalent of kicking a puppy.

"I just wondered if you needed a little stress relief right now. We can make it quick, however you need me."

My balls have ached since earlier this morning when I had my fingers deep inside Arianne. And Penny is a popular club girl because of the way she fucks.

I'm about to say yes, when I think about the innocent way Arianne looked at me while my fingers were knuckle deep in her cunt. Wide eyes, a body vibrating with need. That's what I want more of. My dick thickens at the thought of it. Of tying her hands behind her back or her feet to my bed frame. Of slapping her pussy until her clit pulses.

"So that's a yes," Penny says, sliding her palm over my erection. It feels good, but only because in that fraction of a second, I pretended it was Arianne touching me.

I grab her wrist and remove her hand. "It's a no, Pen."

"Oh, is it because Lola's here? Because she's fine with Iris and Spark for now."

"I don't need a reason to not want to fuck you, Pen."

She glances up at me through thick lashes. "Are you worried about lasting?" she teases.

In the past, I've liked it when Penny played brat for me. But it doesn't come close to Arianne's more natural tendencies.

"We're done here," I say.

"Is it because of Arianne?" she asks, and her lips curl in disgust. "You're all falling for pussy with constraints when you could have any of the club girls for free."

My bet with Switch comes to mind, and it irritates me. "It's not because of Arianne. I barely know anything about her. In fact, I only have Arianne's word that she is who she says she is. For all I know, she could be some grifter who saw that Mercy died and came sniffing for a will. I'm not falling for her pussy."

Penny grins just as I hear a gasp behind me. I don't need to look to know it must be Arianne, but I glance over my shoulder. "I came to see if you needed a hand with Lola before we do cake, but I can see you need absolutely nothing from me."

She hurries back down the hallway.

"Fuck," I mutter. "Arianne. Stop walking."

She carries on down the corridor toward the kitchen.

Penny reaches for my arm. "Let her go. If she doesn't mean anything to you."

Violently, I shake her hand free. "She's fucking family, Pen. More than you'll ever be." I turn down the corridor. "Arianne. I said stop your goddamn hissy fit and come back here right now. You aren't going to want me to make you."

Arianne stops, but she doesn't return or even look over her shoulder. "You'll have my birth certificate by morning, and you can have Vex compare my file to Mercy's. I suggest a full DNA test to show our relationships to Lola." She glances over her shoulder and glares at me. "After all, I've only got your word for it that she is your father's child. Perhaps you're the one who is lying."

When she starts moving again, I feel compelled to follow. "That's the most ridiculous fucking logic I ever heard. Why on earth would I be trying to claim a kid that isn't mine or my father's?"

As I get close, Arianne begins to run, and I realize too late the damage I've done.