Chapter 27

The day of the carnival, Victoria could scarcely contain her excitement. As she and her stepmother approached the carnival, the air was filled with laughter and music. She could see acrobats and performers darting between the crowds and beckoning patrons to watch their performances.

The air was filled with the warm fragrance of fresh bread, roasted meats, and the sweetness of flowers and fruits. Victoria had been to festivals before but never as a member of the ton. She had instead wandered through them in rare pieces of freedom when she was not under her stepmother's watchful eye or completing her chores.

She knew that the theatre troupe was here as well, and they would be performing a few scenes from some of Shakespeare's plays later in the evening. She hoped that her stepmother would allow her to stay long enough to watch them, even though the woman had never been particularly fond of performances like these, favouring instead expensive opera houses and more refined places. Most of all, though, Victoria was excited because she knew that Lord Bedford would be present along with the rest of the ton.

Although Victoria still felt a little bit uncertain because of Lord Bedford's doubts towards her and his even begrudging consideration for her stepmother's words, some sleep and the morning sun had vanquished most of her doubts. He was only human, after all.

Who was to say that she would also not have doubts if she had been in his situation and he were the one being called the rake? In fact, she did recall that she had once doubted him earlier in their acquaintanceship. It was a little disappointing that he might still doubt her after so long, but she supposed she did not entirely blame him.

"Well," Lady Norwood said, "this is certainly a lively atmosphere. We must seek out Lord Ardenridge and greet him."

Lady Norwood always wanted to seek out Lord Ardenridge. Victoria only smiled. She offered no comment of her own. She was still unsure how to approach her stepmother with the revelations that Lord Bedford had shared with her. How could Victoria ever trust her stepmother, knowing what she had said about her?

Even though her stepmother was cold-hearted, Victoria could still not think of any reason why her stepmother might lie so terribly about her. She felt all her tentative hopes that her stepmother might really love her melt away, replaced with only a dull sort of confusion. Why did her stepmother wish to wound her so severely? What had Victoria ever done to deserve such dreadful treatment?

Maybe it did not matter much. She knew that if she had to choose between Lord Bedford and her stepmother, she trusted the lord more. He had consumed her every waking moment since their meeting, and she had spent a good portion of the night before thinking about him and writing her feelings, as complicated as they were, into her play.

Even once she retreated to her bed, he still lingered in her thoughts, and Victoria felt herself grow hot just thinking about his sly smile and dark eyes.

"You could look a little more excited," her stepmother said. "Lord Ardenridge is interested in you, and this is a very lively gathering. It is the sort that inspires spontaneity in men, and I have told you that I think he will propose soon."

"You have," Victoria replied, "but he has not proposed yet. Perhaps Lord Ardenridge is not as interested as we may think that he is."

It was unwise of her to say, and her stepmother cast her a withering glance. "I can assure you that he is. Lord Ardenridge is merely being a cautious man. He must be with his great fortune and his good breeding. But yours is just as good, and I am certain that he will propose soon."

Victoria forced a smile. She wondered if Lord Ardenridge had already asked for her stepmother's blessing, just as Lord Bedford had. If so, had her stepmother given it? In all likelihood, she had. Victoria tried to decide what she would do if Lord Ardenridge did propose at the festival. She must surely refuse him, for her heart belonged to Lord Bedford. But she also had no desire to humiliate Lord Ardenridge. In all likelihood, he did not realize that he was caught in the middle of some game that her stepmother seemed to be playing.

"Come along now," her stepmother said, quickening her pace as she wove through the crowd of performers and guests. "We must find the rest of the ton."

Victoria nodded. She did not disagree with that notion. She and her stepmother only walked for some distance before Victoria caught sight of the familiar tall man with his dark hair and trim figure, emphasized by a well-tailored blue jacket. She swallowed hard and tried not to think about tearing that jacket away from those sinfully broad shoulders.

It was Lord Bedford. Her heart seemed to beat more loudly in her chest, and she heard its echo reverberate inside her skull. She only belatedly noticed that his friend Lord Worthington stood beside him. Was he hoping to glimpse Loralie at the festival?

"There they are," Victoria said. "Lord Bedford and Lord Worthington."

Lady Norwood's head snapped in Lord Bedford's direction. "We do not want to associate with that part of the ton," her stepmother said. "You do remember that he is a notorious rake, do you not? Simply greeting him, much less spending time in his presence, might ruin your chances of a good marriage with Lord Ardenridge."

Victoria curled her fists into the skirts of her gown. Seeing Lord Bedford emboldened her, and hearing his name spoken alongside Lord Ardenridge cast the whole world into a sudden clarity. She needed to be brave now. "No," Victoria said.

Her stepmother halted abruptly and stared at her as if she had lost her mind. "Excuse me?" Lady Norwood asked.

"You heard me," Victoria said, swallowing down the lump that rose in response.

Before falling in love, the thought of defying her stepmother was almost unthinkable. Only the theatre had been worth that. However, her love and desire for Lord Bedford burned like an inferno inside her. She must stand strong now. She must boldly and proudly pursue her own desires for once in her life, just as Lady Constance did in her place.

"No," Victoria repeated. "You are wrong about Lord Bedford. He is not a rake. He is a good man."

"He will break your heart," her stepmother said, "and ruin any chance you have for a good marriage with a more suitable man."

"No, he will not," Victoria replied. "I know him, and I love him!"

It was impossible to say if Lord Bedford had heard her declarations or if he had merely seen her and decided to join them, but whichever the reason, he turned at once and strode through the crowd towards Victoria, who straightened beneath his intense dark eyes. Everything inside her grew hot and tight.

"I will marry him," Victoria said.

Lady Norwood drew in a sharp breath that seemed to echo even in the crowded, loud space. "No," she said. "We must speak about this."

"Speak about what?" Lord Bedford asked. "I love Lady Victoria, and she loves me. It seems as though the matter ought to be settled, and I am prepared to propose right now."

Lady Norwood grasped Victoria's arm, her grip not quite painful but nearly there. "We must speak at once," Lady Norwood said. "Preferably in a more private setting."

"A more private setting?" Lord Bedford asked. "What is wrong with the setting here?"

"Just a moment. I beg you," said Victoria's stepmother. "It will spare us all a great deal of embarrassment if we can just have a little privacy."

Victoria looked at Lord Bedford. "Do you want privacy?" he asked.

Victoria bit her lip. "I think here is fine," she said.

"Well," Lady Norwood said, lips curled in displeasure. "How well do you really know Lord Bedford?"

"I know him very well," Victoria said. "I know him more intimately than I have ever known anyone in my entire life. He loves me, and I have no reason to doubt his love."

"Oh, no? Has he always been truthful with you?" Lady Norwood asked.

"Of course he has been," Victoria replied. "He has never once lied to me."

The idea that he might be dishonest with her was so laughable that Victoria turned to Lord Bedford simply to see his earnest agreement spread across his face. But what she found there gave her pause. Something was wrong with that expression. There was the quickest flicker of doubt, there one second and gone in the next. If Victoria had been less astute, she might have doubted that she saw it at all. But saw it she did, and she could not deny that she had.

"Lord Bedford," she said, her voice shaking. "Thomas. What is it?"

"Tell her the truth," Victoria's stepmother said. "Tell her why you were pursuing her."

Victoria's heart felt as if a demon had seized it. Everything inside her grew tight and constricting. And everything about the festival, all the vivacity, all the liveliness and the chatter and music and delicious scents, seemed to fade away as she waited to hear what dreadful confession was about to spring from her beloved lord's lips.

"You must say that it is not true, right?" Victoria asked. "You pursued me because you love me, of course."

He could not have possibly lied to her. He loved her and had made it quite clear that her heart belonged to him, just as his did to her. This must surely be another trick of her stepmother's, meant to tear them apart now that she found herself losing.

"Well," Thomas said. "You know that our fathers were business partners."

Business partners? Victoria stared at him, uncertain where the conversation was going. "Yes, I knew that. If memory serves, you told me that."

"I did not tell you," Thomas said, "that they had arranged for us to be married. It was something that both of our fathers wanted. And I knew about this. It is true that I kept it from you, but I did not have any ill intentions in keeping you uninformed. You see, I always wanted to marry for a love match, and so I thought it would be best if I did not tell you and that if I won your heart on my own, you could decide if you also wanted me. That is the only thing I did not tell you. And if I am mistaken, I am sorry, but I did not want you to feel as though you were obligated to marry me simply because of what your father and mine decided. I wanted you to have a choice, my beloved Lady Victoria, so that if you could find love with some other man, even if it were someone like Lord Ardenridge, you would feel free to do that."

Victoria's breath caught in her throat. This was not the horrible thing that she had imagined, but when she glanced at her stepmother and saw the woman's victorious smirk, she knew that Lord Bedford's confession was leaving something important out.

"He is lying again," Lady Norwood said. "Shall I tell you why he is lying? It seems that he does not wish to. Lord Bedford wishes to marry you because if he does not, he will lose half his fortune. That is why he pursued you; he wanted the money."

As Victoria stared at her stepmother, her jaw dropped. "That cannot possibly be true," Victoria said. "It—it cannot be."

She looked at Thomas, but his face confirmed it even before he gave her a small, reluctant nod. "I am afraid that it is true. But it had no bearing on my decision to love you. I truly do," Lord Bedford said. "You must believe me."

"And you never once," Victoria said, "thought about the money in your pursuit of me?"

"I did not," he declared.

But she saw the doubt in his eyes. She knew that he was lying. He was not very good at it. Victoria stared at him, feeling as if she had never seen him before, as if he had become an entirely different person before her. She loved this man, and this man had doubted her. She loved this man, and this man wanted to marry her for some money. Victoria felt as if her knees might collapse beneath her – as if the whole ground had fallen away and might swallow her whole. How had she been so very wrong about everything?