15. Switch

15

SWITCH

W ith a belly full of food and a couple of glasses of champagne in my alcohol-parched system, I'm chill as fuck.

The center was great for my rehabilitation, but probably not my sleep and stress levels.

This quiet is good.

Sophia is still in her chair. My feet are on the floor, but I've flopped back on the bed. My left hand aches like a bitch, and I find myself opening my fingers wide, then curling them into a fist.

The bed sinks next to me as Sophia sits and reaches for my hand. "Let me."

She does that thing she did in the center. Stretching my palm, then digging her thumbs in to release the tense muscles. I close my eyes as she works her magic. I feel the warmth of her thigh pressed against mine, and the soft scent of her swirls around me.

I woke up this morning a bachelor. I ended it with a wife.

I hope there's never a time I regret this decision, but right now, it feels pretty special.

"You okay, Sparrow?"

"Mm-hmm."

She flexes my fingers, runs her knuckles up my wrist and forearm. Everything is tight when she starts, but loose before she moves on.

"We should get some oil."

"First thing in the morning," I say. "Just, for the love of God, don't stop now."

Somewhere in the process, I must have fallen asleep because I wake to the brush of Sophia's lips against mine. It's the first time she's taken the lead to kiss me, and I like it.

I cup my hand around the back of her neck and hold her firmly to me. My cock hardens quickly, even though I'm exhausted.

"Come shower with me," I mumble against her lips. "I'll hold you, Sparrow. Won't let you fall."

I can see a hint of nervousness, but no fear. Her cheeks flush. With embarrassment or need, I can't tell yet.

"Okay," she says softly, and I let out a breath of relief.

I stroke my knuckle along her olive-toned skin, taking in her wide eyes, and the slight gap between her two front teeth. The most minor of imperfections is endearing.

"We don't have to do anything more intimate than washing each other," I say. "I wasn't trying to rush us along. I just…I need to take care of you."

"Aren't we supposed to consummate our marriage?"

I huff. "I suppose if we were in medieval England and thought the church or some shit was going to come after us and stone us to death if we didn't, it might matter."

Her brow wrinkles. "They did that?"

"You're relying on high school facts coming out of my mangled head. Might be fact. Might be total confabulation like Belle-Odette."

Sophia smiles softly, and I run my thumb over her lower lip. It's plump, pink, and soft. Not sure what it is about this woman, but she sucks me into her orbit. She can't even show me who she really is because even she doesn't know, and I still find myself fascinated by her.

She's a survivor.

She's still standing.

I'm in awe of her.

She stands and turns, lifting her hair away from the zipper of her dress. "Don't forget Catalina says I have to hang it and not let you ruin it."

"You're sure?" I ask. My voice sounds like I've been on a three-day bender including way too much whiskey.

"I trust you," Sophia says.

I know she's my fake wife, but I feel like she might take my heart anyway.

My fingers are clumsy as fuck when I grip her hips and pull her back between my legs.

I've stitched a man, threaded a needle, and I can't figure out how to do this simple task. Now is not the time to overthink it, but I wonder if I'll ever be able to do any of that again.

My fingers struggle to pinch and grip the zipper, but we don't rush. I take in the way the ends of her hair flutter slightly. How smooth her skin feels beneath my knuckle as I drag the zipper down her back.

I've got no idea how long it's been since I fucked a woman, but my guess is it's been even longer since I made love to one. Just sitting here with Sophia in front of me feels more special than that.

When her zipper is lowered, I turn her around and look up at her. Her pretty eye is on me. She releases her hair, and it falls in a dark waterfall.

I slide my fingertips along the smooth skin of her collarbones, but as I'm just about to push the straps off her shoulders, she stops me.

"It's not pretty…you know. The scars and things. I don't want you to…don't look too closely."

I don't know how to express to her just how much it doesn't matter to me in words I think she'll believe. I have to believe she won't think less of me if the movement on my left side never returns to normal.

"We're both a bit broken, Soph. Let me see the broken parts of you, and I'll share the broken bits of me with you too. Maybe our broken pieces will fit."

"Jesus, Theo," she says, swiping beneath her eyes with her fingertips. "Stop. Unless you want me a bawling mess."

"I'll settle for crying out my name."

She hiccups and laughs. "Kiss me, already," she says.

I settle my palms either side of her neck, my thumbs brushing her jawline, and do as she instructs.

I could happily waste a lifetime or two kissing Sophia Viscuso. She's a fast study for someone who confessed they don't really remember kissing. And I need to remember that I'm effectively holding a virgin in my arms. She doesn't remember what this feels like, how much it is possible to share with another person. She can't remember the first lick, suck, or slide. Or the feel of skin against skin.

Her tongue is gentle against mine, a tentative exploration, and for a moment I let her lead.

But there is a moment when her tits press against my chest.

When my cock is trapped between the two of us.

That instinct takes over.

I ache for her.

This time, she doesn't object when I slip the straps off her shoulders. We wiggle the dress to the ground, but I keep my eyes on her face. Not because I don't want to look at her body.

I do.

But because I acknowledge that she's insecure about the way she looks right now. My hope is that, over time, I can convince her to see herself the way I do.

With confident fingers that belie their physical limitations, I pop the clasp on her bra and let it drop to the floor.

I brush over the rippled skin and the smooth scars. The ridges affect me but not in the way Sophia worries. They tell me what a warrior she is. Worry floods me. We need to understand the truth of what happened to her that day. We need to know the long-term implications for her health. We need to know how to work within her limitations to continue to build her strength.

The we in all that doesn't scare me.

I press my lips to the side of her neck, taking in the scent of her. Sophia tips her head, and I trace the line to her ear, where I gently bite her lobe.

She shivers against me, and I grin. "Like it?" I ask.

"Love it," she replies.

Her answer gives me hope. "I want to try everything with you, Soph. I want us to learn together what we both like. I'll respect your boundaries, but let's explore."

"I'm as excited as I am nervous," she replies. "But, yes. I want to explore things with you too."

Quickly, I strip the rest of my clothes. Sophia helps. But I'm impatient.

I grab two of the new towels and lead us to the bathroom before turning on the shower. It's large with a big showerhead, and when I turn it on, steaming-hot water splashes onto pale gray tiles.

"You first," I say, nudging Sophia beneath the water.

She tips her head back and closes her eyes as water drenches her hair and body. And what a fucking body it is. Heavy tits with nipples that lean brown rather than pink. A narrow waist. But thick thighs and an ass you can grab on to.

She's got a whole lot of hair down there, hiding what I want to see.

As she turns a little beneath the spray, I see her scars. They're vicious red swaths across her body, even after all this time, which tells me just how bad they were when they happened.

"I'm lucky you're even here," I whisper.

Sophia steps out of the spray a little. "Sorry, did you say something?"

I shake my head. "Not a thing." I empty some of her shampoo onto my palm and wash her hair gently.

Bathing together in the soft light of the bathroom is an intimacy money can't buy. As she rinses her hair, bubbles and water sluice down her body, between the valley of her breasts. I follow it with my fingertips.

Sophia gasps as she experiences my touch as if it's her first time. I don't want to be a jealous guy, yet there is something innately primal about being someone's first. I don't care who came first, but I want to be the only one she remembers. I press my mouth to those lush lips of hers and pull her close. The first feel of her skin against mine is like a balm to my soul.

I wrap my arms around her, my hands gliding up her back and fisting her wet hair.

"We go too fast, or I do something you don't like, you tell me," I say.

She nods her agreement. There's a heady mix of arousal, nerves, and trust in her eyes. Tentatively, her hands reach out and slip around my waist.

This first round is going to be over way too soon. My sex-starved body responds immediately. My cock going from interested to harder than a steel pillar in about two seconds.

Sophia glances down between the two of us. "I understood the basics, but…"

Gone are the nerves, replaced with all-too-human hunger.

She reaches between us and runs a single fingertip along the side of my cock. When it twitches in response, she giggles, the sound bouncing off the tiled walls. I can't help but smile in spite of the way she's making me feel.

"Put your palm around it," I instruct.

When she does, I suck in a breath and look up at the ceiling, the image of my cock in her hand burned into my brain.

This is a really bad idea. A memory of my dad telling me to always be a biker on the streets and a gentleman in the sheets flickers. We were drinking beer at a club barbecue. He was looking over at Mom and smiling.

But I know what he means, and letting Sophia jerk me off while I just stand there isn't that.

"It's soft but hard," Sophia says.

I take her hand and press a kiss to her palm. "I want to touch you. You okay with that?"

"I'd like that."

Carefully, I get to know her body. Over the curve of her breast, brushing across her peaked nipple. Down the soft plane of her stomach, past a cute little innie belly button, and through drenched curls of hair.

Sophia opens her legs a little wider for me, and I dip between her thighs, stroking her pussy. She bucks against me almost immediately. I repeat the action. A gentle caress.

Color hits her cheeks as her eyelids flutter closed.

I kiss the tip of her nose, then her lips as I apply a little pressure, easing the tip of my finger into her.

She's wet, warm, and squeezes my finger.

When I withdraw, I circle the hard nub of her clit.

"Theo," she gasps.

"You want me to stop?" I whisper huskily against her ear.

She shakes her head. "If you stop, I might have to kill you."

I chuckle but continue. Alternating between her clit and her pussy, I add another finger, stretching her wide.

"Faster," she encourages. I love that she's so uninhibited in this moment with me. She feels safe enough to ask for what she needs.

I do as she asks, and I'm so into it, I might fucking come just watching her, but then she cries out.

And it's not a cry of orgasm. Her fingernails dig into my shoulder, creating a heavenly glitch between pleasure and pain. "My balance. My leg."

I stop what I'm doing immediately and offer her my arms to grip onto. She tries to shake out her left side, but it's difficult. I lead her to the seat at the back of the shower and help her sit.

"You okay? What can I do?" I ask. The room is steamy and warm enough that we don't get cold.

She shakes her head but looks down at the floor. "Sorry I ruined the mood."

There's hurt and embarrassment and sadness in her tone. So, I crouch in front of her. "Hey. Look at me, Sparrow."

Sophia does as I say. "Sorry."

"No. We don't say sorry for needing to accommodate ourselves. I should have checked if you were okay. I know you were tired. You ever feel unsteady or unstable, just tell me you need to move before it becomes pain."

She bites down on her lower lip. "I was enjoying it though. I didn't want it to stop."

"Those are words to warm my heart." I slip my hands to her knees and slide them ever so gently apart. "Anything hurts, you just tell me, and we'll adjust."

She nods and lets me spread her legs. Her pussy is right there, almost at eye level, and it's a thing of fucking beauty. The ledge is at the perfect height for me to lean forward and lazily lick her clit. I can't help but think whoever designed this shower stall had that in mind.

Dirty fucker, and my new best friend.

Sophia's hands slide into my wet hair and she tugs hard as I lap at her.

She likes it.

So do I.

I alter her position on the bench so her pussy is tilted up towards me, and I dip my tongue inside her. Her hips roll as she seeks to find what she wants.

Don't know what my preferences in women were before, but I find I love the way Sophia joins in. The way she seeks what feels good.

And even though she doesn't remember what an orgasm at the hands of another person feels like, she's chasing it anyway.

I add a finger, then another. Thrusting them in and out of her. Then something else takes over. I scissor my fingers open and closed. I rub hard at the rippled surface deep inside Sophia, and she cries out as fluid rushes from her.

It's so fucking hot.

But Sophia screeches to a halt. "Did I just pee?"

I shake my head. "No, sweetheart. That was squirting. I'll explain the difference later, but I love that you felt everything we're doing so intensely."

I lower my mouth to her pussy and start bringing her up all over again. Sucking on her clit, then laving it. Alternating as I dip my fingers in and out of her.

"Theo," she gasps as her orgasm starts to build. Her fingers return to my hair, tugging on it as she rides my face with abandon.

I love the sting of her nails scratching my scalp.

Her cry echoes around the shower as she comes loudly.

"Oh, God," she gasps, her breath catching.

And I feel like a fucking man again.

Like I just did something special. Something only I can do.

Sophia's thighs shake as I pull my fingers from her. Her gaze follows as I dip them into my mouth to taste her. It's an automatic gesture, and I hope to fuck it's procedural memory leading the way.

With her eyes closed, she slumps back against the shower wall. "So, your mouth isn't just good for talking," she says finally.

I chuckle at that, even though my cock aches. I stroke it as I observe her post-orgasmic glow. "My mouth can do lots of things if you'll let it."

She leans forward and places her hand over mine. "Let me help you with that."

"We might have had enough excitement for tonight. You can go get in bed, and I'll take care of this in the shower."

"Stand, please," she says.

I cup her chin firmly. "Only because you asked nicely."

"You're going to need to guide me, Theo," she says.

I stand between her legs and place my hands on the wall of the shower behind her.

"Lick me. Suck me. Grip me and stroke me. Any of those four things and we'll be golden, Sparrow."

Sophia leans forward and licks the underside of my cock, and my eyes roll back in my head. I take a deep breath and look down to find her looking up at me.

It's a pretty spectacular view.

Her eyes are wide open, her cheeks flushed. And her mouth… Fuck, the way her tongue strokes along the veiny underside of my cock is better than any porn I watched.

I want to video that mouth and play it back.

I want to be able to see what the two of us look like together.

I want mirrors.

But more, I want the feel of her lips wrapped around my cock. "Suck me, Sparrow. Wanna see you take me deep."

Grabbing my cock, I angle it so it's in line with her mouth. And Sophia wraps me in those thick, lush lips of hers.

"Fuck," I hiss. "Feels so good."

Her hand grips the length she can't swallow, and I thrust gently back and forth, unable to control the movement of my hips.

She's so warm and wet. I close my eyes so I can't see her. Because the visual is gonna make me come way faster than I want to.

I want to savor this for a moment.

I want to remember who I am. Who I was?

I want to be Switch for a hot second.

Her saliva coats my cock, easing the slide of her palm. The sensations intensify. It's no use pretending I can last tonight when she already has me on a knife's edge.

"Watching you come got me all riled. Watching you suck my cock has me close." My breath is coming faster, punctuating my words. "You don't want me to come in your mouth, you better take me out now."

Sophia looks up, and while her mouth is occupied, I can see the making of a smile.

That one staggeringly beautiful look is enough to send an orgasm hammering down my spine, through my balls. I come hard. She can't swallow fast enough.

My cum seeps out of the corner of her mouth, dribbling down her chin.

It's hot as fuck.

Dizziness hits, and I palm the shower wall to keep my balance. My left arm shakes, trying to take my weight.

"Sparrow," I say breathlessly, before placing a kiss on the top of her head.