27. Vex

27

VEX

I sit at a round table with Switch, King, and Niro, but my eyes are on Calista.

She's trying her best, and maybe the others don't realize because she's doing a good job of masking it, but she definitely isn't enjoying today. Vi and Iris are animatedly talking about something, and they're trying to include Calista, but I know my girl. And the small talk she's making and the smile she's faking aren't her.

"Does Vex have a little girlfriend?" Niro teases, looking in the same direction as me.

"Fuck you," I reply.

"From where I'm sitting, it appears you'd rather be fucking her," King says.

I flip the bird at my president.

All three of them chuckle.

"So, you grew up with her?" King asks.

I nod. "I moved in next door to Calista. Her mom was the only one on the street who welcomed us to the neighborhood. Then, she became a teacher at the school we went to. Cal hated it. But Mrs. Moray would look out for me."

"You guys hook up back then?" Niro asks.

"No." For some reason, sharing too much about mine and Calista's past feels wrong. Plus, I don't want to say one word more than I have to that might lead to a comment with an old timer. Because I really want to know who went to her house that day so I can question them and smash their fucking faces in.

"So why you looking at her like you got some beef with her?" Niro asks.

"Brother," Switch says to Niro. "Do we get all up in your business about Cat?"

Niro shrugs. "I mean, you did when I came in with that black eye."

King huffs. "Yeah, and we learned more than I ever want to know about your sex life because of it."

Niro opens his mouth to speak, but I put my hand out to stop him. "You tell the story of how that harness holding her legs broke again and I'll give you another black eye to match the one you had."

Niro laughs. "It was a good fucking story, though. And some of the best sex I ever had. Perhaps you should try some of that."

I think of the visual of all that red rope tied around Calista's body. Can only imagine what she'd look like with cuffed ankles and a spreader bar.

Switch laughs. "Good job your better half knows you speak without filters. Sophia would be horrified if I told you all our sex stories."

"Anyway, what's got a stick up your ass?" King says.

"I don't have a stick up my ass."

Switch squeezes my shoulder. "Leave him alone if he doesn't want to talk about her. You two are the worst."

"She's too independent," I say, expecting them to give me shit.

"Shit. Got me one of those too," King says. "Took me a while to convince her we could be something."

Niro raises an eyebrow. "Maybe it was the whole kidnapping thing you did to her."

King raises his middle finger, and Niro laughs.

Switch looks over at Sophia. "I sometimes worry that Sophia will wake up one morning and realize she doesn't need me anymore. Every day she finds more and more of her independence again."

Niro huffs. "She's not going anywhere, and you and I both know it. She can be independent because you give her space to be who she is."

We all look at Niro like he's grown a second head.

"What?" he says. "That's what I do for Cat, and she loves me the most for it."

Switch thinks about what Niro is saying, for a moment. "There may be some sense to that."

"Think about it, for a moment," Niro continues. "If an independent woman loves you, it really means something. Rae, Sophia, Calista, Cat. They don't really need shit from us. They can do everything on their own. Cook for themselves. Work for themselves. So, if an independent woman chooses you, they want you just for being you. Not what you can bring her and give her and do for her."

King leans forward. "That's a pretty profound insight, brother," he says.

"I'm not finished," he says. "Because with an independent woman, it's going to take a while for her to let you help her, because she's probably got really deep reasons why she's always done things alone. She's been abused, she's been forced to carry others, she's been left behind or abandoned to fend for herself. Or she's been let down a million times, especially by men, until she genuinely believes she's the only person who can look out for herself. It takes time and persistence to break that kind of shit down."

I look at Niro and see the man he's becoming. "That's some accurate shit."

And it's true. I was her best friend, and I let her down. Then, the club let her down. Then, her mom let her down. One of the suspects for the stalking is some rich dude who let her down when she went to him for advice.

"Guess that makes us the lucky fuckers," King says, raising his beer bottle. "Here's to the independent women who love us."

We cheer across the table, but I still worry about Calista. She hasn't told me how she feels about me, even though I've come close to calling her mine and telling her how much she means to me.

She's now chatting with Gwen and Rae. But the trouble with those two is they spend so much time together that they don't realize when they are accidentally excluding someone. I'm happy my vice president found his way with my president's sister. And I'm glad King found Rae because she's the best old lady to a president there is. But I see Calista just nodding occasionally while the two of them chat.

Whatever they're talking about doesn't interest her or include her or ignite the spark I see when she talks about something she really cares about. And for Calista's part, I'm not sure why she isn't trying harder.

I also see her slightly upturned nose when Iris walks by, revealing her Property of Spark cut over a black jumpsuit that covers her bulging baby bump. I can see Calista's eyes hover over the words on her back.

Yeah, can't see her wearing one of those by choice, and as I sit here, I find myself torn between Calista, her career, loving who she is, and wanting her to be mine.

"Just gotta go check on something," I say, and grab my beer. I catch Calista's eye as I walk towards the corridor and tip my head in the direction of the room.

She nods, and when I hit my bedroom, I leave the door open. On the wall are photographs of some of the trips I've been on. Unlike Switch, who sticks any old snapshot onto the wall with pins and tape, I have carefully curated ten of my favorite pictures and had them framed.

Sturgis Motorcycle Rally a year after I joined. Me, King, Clutch, and Halo leaning against our bikes like the young punks we were back then. It looks like a seventies polaroid. Four young guns on a freedom ride. It was the first time Clutch got arrested for defending me when some white cops tried to pull the old you aren't from around here bullshit involving a broken taillight that was in fine working order until one of them smashed it. Don't know where we all would have been if Halo hadn't secretly recorded the whole thing on his phone.

Switch and I on a fishing trip he insisted I go with him on. Didn't like the live bait, or the unhooking a fish. Loved the taste of them cooked in butter on a cast iron skillet over an open flame, though. The photo is a selfie Switch took of the two of us in our chairs holding beers. Sparks fly off the campfire. I'd forgotten how carefree Switch could look, compared to now when he has a permanent wrinkle across his brow. His accident aged him.

And there's a group shot of us all at Spark and Iris's wedding last year. Spark and Iris are in the middle, but the rest of us around them are a mismatch of couples. Niro has his arm over Rae's shoulder. King is with his sister. Halo is standing behind Briar with his hands on her shoulders. I'm with Switch, as always. We're all different, but we fit. It's wild to think Ari and Sophia weren't part of the family back then. It seems like every woman was made to fit the club. I sigh. No, they weren't. I'm just being dramatic. King kidnapped Rae. Catalina kidnapped Niro. Ari's sister had to die for her to meet Halo, who had sworn off monogamous relationships. Switch needed a brain injury to meet Sophia.

No one is perfect.

The path hasn't been smooth for anyone.

"Knock, knock," Calista says as she walks through the door.

I hold out my hand to her, and she takes it.

"You doing okay?" I ask, locking the door behind her.

"I'm good," she says, but it's noncommittal.

"You almost sound like you mean that."

She smiles, but it doesn't quite meet her eyes. "I'm fine."

I tug her to me. "What's going on?"

"I try not to let the past affect my present on a day-to-day basis, but it's weird. Being here. Knowing that Clutch is Cue Ball's son. I want to give him a fair chance. It's not fair to hold him accountable for his father's actions. But I can't stop thinking that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and they're so alike in looks it's hard to forget. Then, there's Gwen, who is Clutch's partner. And I know the old ladies are trying to be nice, but I'm not sure I have much in common with them. Thankfully, Halo looks nothing like Wrinkle."

I pull her right up against my chest. "Some days it feels like we'll never have our chance, doesn't it?"

"It certainly wasn't when we were younger." She wraps her arms tightly around me. "And we both know that this will come to an end. You here. Me there. What kind of life would that be?"

I don't want to think about it. Or maybe I want to overthink it. Part of me thinks there has to be a way around this. Where the two of us make a go of it. And part of me thinks she's right.

Meeting in the middle is impossible.

"Then, I guess we have to do what we have to do," I say. Which means finally falling in love with my best friend, knowing she was once, and may still be, madly in love with me too. And that we aren't going to be together.

"What does that mean?" Calista looks up at me with those big eyes of hers, echoing my thoughts.

"I wish I knew."

I seek comfort in her lips, feeling displaced, all of a sudden. Unaware if I belong here with my brothers or somewhere else with her.

The kiss turns seeking. I don't know where the answers lie, but I'm hoping to find them in her body.

Because I don't know where else to look.

I shimmy the hem of the dress up her legs and find she's wearing some sexy-ass stockings with lace tops. I slip her panties down her legs, then lift her to sit on my desk. I rarely use the one in my bedroom because I have my setup in my office.

Calista looks to the closed door. "Ti. What if?—?"

"No one will come in here, and the door is locked. Just focus on me." I slide my hands up her thighs, parting them as I go. "Softest fucking skin."

Calista puts her hands behind her on the desk and leans back. Her tits stand proud beneath her dress and her hair hangs down her back.

I cup her ass and tug her right to the edge of the desk before dropping to my knees so I can kiss her pussy. I lap at her lips and suck her clit into my mouth. Gently, I bite the area around her clit, sucking on it as I do so.

"Ti," Calista cries out.

I want her to accept this. Me. Who I am. What this clubhouse means to me. "I think you should call me ‘Vex' when we're in here."

Her eyes go wide as she looks down at me. "Keep eating me like that and I'll call you whatever you want…Vex."

I smirk as I go back to town on her. Lapping, licking, sucking, and biting until she's squirming against me. She tugs on my hair and rides my face, and I'm here for every insatiable minute of it.

I slide a finger into her, then another, and a third. I must be stretching her wide, but she doesn't complain.

In fact, the opposite happens.

She cries out as she comes around me. Every part of her tenses to my touch as she rides out the high she's experiencing.

I wipe my face on her thigh, feeling her shake beneath my touch as she gasps for breath. It takes me ten seconds to free my cock and put a condom on before cupping beneath her ass and sliding inside her. I need to bend my knees a little to make the angle work as she welcomes me home.

She's so wet and warm that my control is immediately tested.

I grab her around the waist and lift her into my arms. Her legs immediately wrap around my waist as I slam her back to the wall. "Wanted you like this that day in your mom's living room," I say.

Calista cups my cheeks and kisses me tenderly. "Then, I suggest less talking, more fucking," she says.

I deliberately pause to prove she isn't in control of the situation, then chuckle as she tries to grind against me. I grip her hips, hard, and use my body weight to hold her pinned against the wall. Two of my photographs are displaced, but right now, I couldn't care less.

"I know you're the boss woman outside these doors, but in here, I call the shots, sweetheart."

She chuckles at that. "Only because I let you."

"Yeah?" I say, withdrawing an inch before shunting back home.

Her head falls back against the wall. "Vex."

My road name falling from her lips hits different. I repeat the action, pulling out a little farther this time. "You want something?"

She opens her eyes and then quickly narrows them at me. "You know what I want."

I nod. "I do." I slide out of her until we're nearly disconnected, but don't thrust back in.

"Then do it." The exasperation in her voice makes me smile.

"Ask me nicely, babe."

I could swear Calista growls, but then she grins. "I hate you."

I kiss the corner of her lips. "You could never hate me, Cal. Even when you thought you did."

"You ruin this dress, I might."

"I'll buy you a new one." My cock aches as I slide back inside her.

"I can buy my own."

I raise an eyebrow. "I buy it, I can rip you out of it."

Calista sighs. "Please, Vex. Fuck me like you own me."

The words thrash around in the shell of my chest. "My pleasure, sweetheart."

And I do.

It's more than a fuck up against a wall. It's more than making love.

It's cosmic.

Magic.

Something only the two of us can create.

And when I come inside her, and her pussy clamps down around my cock as she joins me, I wonder how the fuck I'm gonna let her go.