Chapter 33

33

Shelby

You really want to know what happened?!

My best friend told me she thought her boyfriend was in love with someone else! And then she took off, got into her car, and got into an accident that took her life!

"She didn't want me to leave," Faust says. "I had to. Hockey stuff. I told myself nothing could ever get in the way of hockey. Which was a lie. You could have."

He looks at me.

I'm not sure how that should make me feel.

"One word and I would have dropped everything for you," he says. "I mean, I kind of did. Later…"

"Faust, I feel like we did something bad. And wrong. She knew. She knew something was wrong. She had a feeling you weren't into her. I didn't say a word to her either. I just listened. I only did that because I didn't know what to say. If it were any other guy I would have plenty to say. I would have kept her near me! Don't you get it? I let her leave! I had to let her leave because I was the one she was scared about and didn't know it! And then she…"

I gasp for a breath.

Faust places his coffee cup down and takes mine from me.

"Dammit, sweetie, you have to stop that kind of thinking right now," he says. "I know what you're thinking. I've thought it a hundred times too. There was brake fluid all over the road. I went through the accident report so many times. What happened to Amy was unfair. She deserved better in life. But she did not crash her car on purpose. No. She did not."

I burst into tears.

Faust wraps his strong arms around me and pulls me closer and holds me.

I cry.

I cry so uncontrollably. It's embarrassing but I can't help it.

All I could think about all these years is that my best friend did something to herself because of me. Because of Faust. Because nothing was ever said.

"We… we still… lied…"

My words are hard to speak.

"Fine," Faust says. "We fucked up, Shelby. People fuck up. You had no idea who I was to her and I had no idea who you were to her. And I'm not making an excuse at all here, but Amy could get really mean and really dark. It weighed on me for a long time, Shelby. How to approach her and how to handle things. It was messy. That's it. The entire thing was messy."

"Messy," I say as I gasp for a breath. I lift my head and look up at Faust. Beautiful, sexy, handsome, gorgeous Faust. "What about what we did then? Huh? We stood there at her funeral and you had your arm around me. Oh, yeah, sure, to everyone watching, you were just consoling me. You were being a good friend or something. But we both knew what we felt. That's why you showed up the next night! Admit it!"

"Of course!" Faust growls. "The thought of you in pain hurt me. I didn't give a fuck what the circumstances were. I knew you were alone. I knew you were hurting. I knew you needed someone. And I knew… I was the only someone for you. Only you and I could understand what it felt like. That's the truth, Shelby."

"We weren't even drunk," I whisper.

"No, we weren't."

"I wanted you to show up so bad, Faust. When I opened that door and saw you…"

He nods. "When you opened that door and I saw you…"

Oh, fuck.

I can't help it as I jump up to him, needing his lips touching mine.

We kiss wildly. I climb up on top of him right there in his bed again.

His hands move under the t-shirt and grab for my panties.

What the fuck are you doing, Shelby?!

I ignore that same voice just like I did years ago.

I lift my left leg and feel Faust taking my panties off.

He then pushes the front of his shorts down.

My god his cock is so beautiful. I've seen it, touched it, tasted it, felt it. It's gotten me pregnant. And it's still such a beautiful sight.

I grab for him and squeeze and stroke.

I gasp into his mouth as he growls into mine.

He grabs my wrist and pulls my hand away. He grabs the backs of my legs and pulls me over him.

"Goddammit, Shelby," he growls. "I've loved you from the moment I first met you. And I've never stopped loving you since then!"

He pulls me down and thrusts up.

I instantly lose my breath and he fills me with his love.

Oh… God… he loves me… Faust loves me!

I collapse to his chest, a breathless mess.

I'm so overcome by emotion tears fill my eyes.

My hips are still slightly rocking. I can still feel him pulsing inside me.

I manage to find my breath.

My breathing is heavy.

I smell his chest and his shoulder. His manly scent. Sex and sweat. His expensive cologne trying to linger.

His massive hands holding me, keeping me tight against his body.

I'm pretty sure we both wish we could remain in this position forever.

That's not possible.

There's so much more to talk about. So much more to figure out.

I catch myself kissing his shoulder.

Kissing up to his neck.

For the last few minutes I swear I keep hearing my phone going off.

Buzzing with some kind of notification.

My mom instinct suddenly creeps in and I have to check to see.

"Oh, shoot," I say.

"What is it?" Faust asks.

"Dani is texting me. They're a minute from being back. Oakley threw up."

"He… what?"

"Either Auntie Dani let him hit the sugar too hard or he's got some kind of stomach bug."

I stand there partially naked and look back at Faust as he's mostly naked too.

Without hesitation he swings his legs off the bed and stands up.

He walks up behind me and leans down to kiss my shoulder.

"Let me know if I should call a doctor or if I can get him some kind of medicine," he says.

I smile and lean back, melting against him.

I close my eyes.

It feels so good right now to not be alone.