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Chapter 10 - Flynn

It feels like the swirls of ivory paint that make up the patterns on the ceiling begin to move with a life of their own. It’s probably just my imagination since I’ve been staring at it ever since I returned home.

It might just be the liquor laced with wolfsbane I drank when I arrived, the only thing to keep a semblance of sanity intact as I wrestled with the reality that Lila Hargis is now under the same roof as I am.

The pad of my thumb traces my bottom lip as my mind drifts back to the ceremony. Watching Lila walk down the aisle toward me in a white dress made her look like an angel, then holding her hand as Father talked us through the ritual and finally leaning in to kiss her.

I’d never experienced such a strong connection with another wolf. Not even with those I share the mind link with or other she-wolves I’ve shared a bed with.

The kiss was different, igniting my soul and howling to my inner wolf as our tongues danced in perfect harmony.

It shouldn’t have felt so extraordinary. Not when she’s the Omega, and the only one in the pack who hates me.

The latter is what unsettles me the most, my eyes narrowing at the ceiling as if I’m throwing daggers like darts. I can’t accept that she hates me. Not when that damn-near uncontrollable need to be near her has me going insane.

It’s insanity I felt when I kissed her, immersed in the heavenly scent of sweetness that enveloped her being. My heart had been pounding in my chest, beating as if a magnetic pull was drawing me toward the magnet of her own heart.

I’d lost myself for a moment until I remembered that she hated me. It felt like a moment that was stolen, undeserving of its profound nature, when there’s so much we haven’t spoken about.

I pull my hand away from my lips and catch myself basking in a precious moment that should not have happened. Tearing myself off the couch, I turn to the stairs and take a deep breath for composure.

I am the Alpha of Blood Moon now, I remind myself. I can’t be such a coward. I have been through excruciating training and fought gallantly to ensure the safety of the pack by making it through special ops training.

How can a simple thing like speaking to Lila seem so daunting?

Perhaps it’s that pull I feel toward her, but it’s a feeling I can ignore. I have enough strength in me to block out any vulnerable feelings, the ones that might weaken me to the unknown.

Squaring my shoulders and curling my fists, I ascend the stairs and head to the main bedroom. What was once Mother and Father’s suite has now become ours—except I’ve been too spineless to join Lila in the room, remaining a recluse in the living room for the rest of the evening.

Until now. I have to brave this torment and deal with this like a real man—not like the immature boy I was before I left for the mountains, but like the Alpha of Blood Moon, who just made the Omega his mate.

I push the door open with a force that stretches from a determined mind into a flat palm. Lila shrieks in surprise, turning horrified eyes on me as her creamy cheeks turn a bright shade of pink.

“What are you doing?!” she demands, clutching the towel in her fists to her chest.

“I—We need to talk.” I hesitate, entering the room.

Lila backs away then, frowning at me accusingly. “And I need my privacy, Alpha,” she sneers as she tilts her chin away in defiance.

When did she get so feisty?

Her coldness, I could understand. But this is a side of Lila I never thought possible. When her nostrils flare and her frown deepens, it ignites something innate inside me.

She's not allowed to speak to me like this. I am her Alpha.

“Might I remind you that this is as much my room as it is yours?” I put forward with a quirked brow, calmly strolling toward the bed after shutting the door behind me. I casually flop onto the bed, crossing my arms behind my head.

I can only hope that she sees how serious I am, and not get any indication that inappropriate images are flashing in my mind.

Gulping, I attempt to stop the awareness from flowing down to my core when I picture the towel slipping off her chest and pooling at her feet. To see her full breasts exposed would be the highlight of my reign as Alpha.

Maybe a little more, if I'm being honest. It might be the highlight of my entire existence, to finally see what I'd denied myself the night of the bonfire party when I found myself outside her cabin.

“Do you not value anyone's privacy?” she grumbles, narrowing her eyes at me.

“You're not just anyone , Lila. You are my mate.”

“As I'm aware,” she bleats, grabbing her clothes from the foot of the bed and snapping her head away while she mutters incomprehensibly under her breath. “If you'll excuse me, I need to get dressed. I'm going to visit the pack center.” She turns and begins marching toward the bathroom door, and I know she's about to secure herself in there.

She doesn't want to speak to me.

But I can't allow this.

Rushing off the bed, I swiftly put myself between the door and Lila. She shrieks again, unable to proceed to her hiding spot. She gasps, slowly lifting her eyes to my face with a glare.

“Move, Flynn,” she grates out firmly.

“Not a chance,” I refuse with a grunt. My eyes flicker to her lips, which quiver with irritation but remind me of the kiss we shared earlier today.

If it wasn’t for how the pack constantly treated her, all of Blood Moon would have witnessed the sparks that flew around us when our lips met. It’s my fault that they kept bullying her, and my fault that they didn’t get to witness something I can hardly believe myself.

Shaking my head and brushing aside the thought of the kiss, I meet her eyes, full of derision as she glowers at me.

“The pack center?” I lift a quizzical brow. “What for?”

“Work, obviously,” she says indifferently.

A pang in my chest suddenly has me seeing red. “What makes you think you can still continue working there?”

She shrugs. “Your mother thinks—”

“It doesn’t matter what my mother thinks!” I roar angrily, unsure why I suddenly feel so possessive of Lila. Why do I care what she does or doesn't do?

I take a deep breath, calming myself. “It's your wedding night.” The words slip off my tongue without my control.

“So?”

“So…?” I repeat with a disbelieving scoff, confused by her blatant disregard for the implications of the wedding night. Of course, she wouldn't understand the importance of tonight when all of this has happened so quickly.

Even I can hardly make sense of the feelings stirring in my chest, compelling me to keep her safe. In my arms. Under me…

“Firstly”—I hold a finger up in warning—“you're gonna stop working at the center. There is no need for it. Secondly”—I put out another finger—“you’re gonna listen very carefully to what I have to say.”

Lila huffs, her blue eyes darkening before she flicks damp tendrils of hair over her shoulder as she heads to the bed. She flings her clothes on the mattress, then takes a seat at the edge, clutching the towel so tightly to her chest that her knuckles pale.

I chuckle sardonically as I lean against the doorframe, crossing my arms before speaking.

“I’m sorry, Lila. For everything.” It feels as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, but my apology is met with resistance when Lila scoffs.

“You’re sorry?” she snickers. “So what is this?” She throws her arms up in a gesture of defeat. “Is this your grand gesture of apology, Flynn?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You picked me as your mate 'cause you couldn’t just say sorry?” Lila scoffs, rolling her eyes and throwing me off the edge.

I march over to her, fists curled at my sides. When I glare into her eyes fiercely, towering over her, I lose my sense of dominance when she stands up and glares with equal ferocity at me.

My heart does that odd little flip, then tugs forward as if a magnetic force compels me forward. The air is dense with tension, but a sweetness curls in my airways when I inhale. Still, I glower down at her, frustrated by how she shakes me to the core.

That's it. That's always been it.

Lila brings out the very worst in me. There's a feeling so deeply buried that it vexes me to the point of madness.

I don’t understand it. I can’t make sense of her.

Why am I drawn to her, when logically, I shouldn’t be? She’s without a wolf, the lowest ranked in our pack. I am the Alpha of Blood Moon, and it would have worked in my favor to have a strong Luna by my side.

My parents have taken it too lightly for my liking, turning the whole thing into a strategic move that makes no sense.

How am I to face the other Alphas in the alliance? I’ll be ridiculed when they hear about this, having to explain that Blood Moon is a united front that values every member’s life. It’s something my brother would have agreed to.

But he’s not here anymore.

All the rampant thoughts in my mind become pointless when Lila’s lips part. My gaze is drawn to those soft cushions of sweet flavor, bedewed by the glistening essence of her own rage when her tongue skims her lips.

“I don’t understand it,” she says, mirroring my sentiments. “You rejected me that day, there was no need to prove that you’re a good man by picking me as your mate.”

“A good man?” I scoff. “I’m not a good man, Lila. I am the Alpha of this pack.”

“So what do you want with me?” she asks with a sarcastic chuckle. “I’m just the wolf-less girl. The baby elephant, remember?”

A glint of sadness flashes through her eyes, and for a fleeting moment, I catch her dropping her guard and showing vulnerability.

She hasn’t really gotten over that day in the meadow. She’s been pretending all along. It was only toughened walls she’d been keeping up, pretending to be cold toward me.

Her moment of weakness ignites my own, my heart and mind softening as I take a step forward and close the little distance between us. It’s a motion that happens naturally, an unseen force pulling me forward until my senses are engulfed in her presence. A sweet scent enters my airways, my heart pounding as if to match hers when I suddenly hear the racing patter of her heartbeat.

I quickly reel my rational mind back in, conflicted by these feelings while I wrestle with the knowledge that this is a bad idea.

Lila as my mate is a bad idea for the safety of this pack.

I groan, wanting to back away but unable to move. Somehow, I’m drawing forward, craving the sweet scent that lingers around her. “You need to stop…”

Lila frowns, her head coiling back. “Stop what?”

“Stop breathing,” I grunt, inhaling sharply as I dip my head to her neck, her scent gland throwing off pheromones that weaken my knees. She shouldn’t have that much of an effect on me, not when she doesn’t possess a wolf. Still, I draw closer like a bee circling a pollinated flower, my mind heady with the intoxication of her essence.

“If you hate me so much, Alpha Flynn, why don’t you just throw me out of this pack?” she grates out valiantly, sharp beads of blue piercing my vision and blurring it, sending me over the edge of my sanity.

“I have a better idea,” I grunt, grabbing the back of her neck and pulling her forward. I crush my lips to hers with a force to be reckoned with, a force to reinstate my dominance as the Alpha of the pack when I’m clearly losing my mind.

I shouldn’t be this weak, caving in and exploring why I cannot be away from her. But it’s as if her lips carry a lifeforce that has me clambering for more, fervently kissing her lips in search of the answers.

All I can find is that I’m no longer weak. I feel stronger than ever, my hands finding purchase on her hips to pull her flush against my body. Her supple, ample curves mold to my hard frame, a stark contrast, but one that feels like a perfect fit. When she moans into the kiss, it’s the epitome of the lifeforce I crave, and I drink it in as if it’s my only source of sustenance.

“ Mate…” my inner wolf hums, snapping me from the moment to abruptly break the kiss. I stare dubiously at Lila’s flushed face, my brows furrowing as I attempt to center my mind and thoughts again.

Of course, she’s my mate. That’s what my inner wolf chose for me. Lila breathes heavily, her chest rising and falling unsteadily as the mounds of her breasts threaten to break free from the towel.

“You have to stop this, Flynn,” she pleads, her bottom lip trembling and swollen from the hungry kiss. She tries wriggling free from my arms, but I clutch her more tightly.

“I don’t need to stop anything, Lila,” I say with a rumble that reverberates in my chest. A sound so primal, it’s energized by my inner wolf—that inner voice and inner power that I stop fighting. How can I, when feral desire courses through my veins and gives strength to my manhood?

My baser urges win, my inner wolf taking the reins and leaving no space for logic.

“You are my mate, and I am your Alpha. I can do as I please.”

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