Chapter 11 - Lila

I bat my eyelids in disbelief, staring at Flynn as if he’s gone mad. He’s crazy, once again going from icy cold to as fiery as a furnace in a split second.

So have I, intoxicated by the addicting effect of his minty kisses and the way his large, strong hands grip my waist possessively.

There’s a feral glint in his eyes, dark now with ravenous lust. The towel hugging my body does little to protect me from his radiating presence, or from the rigidness of his manhood that swells against my belly.

I press my knees together when I feel warmth ooze from my core and slip down my inner thighs. A shiver passes through me, shuddering my body into pliancy against his hard frame. He doesn’t stop staring fiercely into my eyes, a brow raised expectantly in anticipation of more resistance from me.

I wish I had the strength to fight him, to hold those walls that I built high enough and keep him out so I wouldn’t have to feel so weak. Without a wolf, I feel so defenseless against him, against his contradictory behavior changing with at a flip of an imaginary switch. I’m vulnerable to face the feelings I’ve buried away, feelings that I've tried to convince myself that he doesn't deserve.

Right now, none of that matters. It’s almost as if what happened two years ago is wiped from existence, leaving behind only the remnants of those emotions I felt when I saw his reflection on the surface of the shallow body of water. The sensations I felt then return now, my fingers tingling, my ears ringing, and my heart racing as if reaching out for his.

I’m practically melting toward him, an unseen force magnetizing me forward as my eyes flutter closed. I’m inebriated by this moment, my last-ditch attempt to fight the inevitable surrender the only reason I murmur, “I can’t stand you, Flynn…I hate you…”

“I know,” he drawls, his voice dark and brooding as he hitches a hand beneath the edge of the towel where it hangs over my breasts. “But you want me, nonetheless,” he purrs as he rips the towel from my body, leaving me fully exposed in front of him.

Instinctively, my hands fly up to cover my bare breasts, my breath hitching in my throat when he groans and stares at my naked body, with all its voluptuous curves and rolls that I’m not particularly proud of, but Flynn’s eyes sparkle with marveling wonder.

“Fuck,” he groans through gritted teeth, ogling me with a clenched jaw and lust darkening his eyes. A small frown grows on his face when he spots the remnants of the burn marks from the accident with Cynthia. His eyes flicker back to mine, sending a shiver down my spine.

It’s not as if it’s true concern that contorts his face. He must be revolted by the appearance of the ghastly scars that haven’t healed fully, even as he reaches out and touches the nasty abrasion on the top of my right breast.

“What happened?” he asks with the frown still tugging his brows.

I shrug, bashfully turning my face away as heat crawls up my cheeks. “Nothing,” I say, not seeing the need to tell him the truth.

It’s not like it matters now, anyway.

Flynn hooks a finger under my chin, shaking his head slowly and stepping forward. I can’t tell if he’s disgusted by the horrid burn marks, but he grabs the back of my neck to pull me in for a ravenous kiss.

It doesn’t matter when he’s consumed by lust. Even I lose the cloak of shame when his kisses are so hungry, allowing myself to ease into the promises of pleasure.

Flynn greedily devours my lips, primal groans vibrating down my throat as he walks me backward. When the backs of my knees hit the bed, he abruptly breaks the kiss and pushes me onto the bed with the gentle but firm force of his hands on my shoulders. I gulp as I lie down in surrender, legs draped over the edge of the bed, my thighs falling open naturally.

My breathing staggers in my throat as I witness the Alpha become possessed by lust that consumes his eyes and turns them devilish as he rakes his gaze down my body. With a long inhale, he breathes in the scent in the air when his eyes settle on the apex of my thighs, another animalistic rumble permeating from his chest.

Flynn bites his bottom lip when he meets my eyes again, shaking his head in disbelief. “You have to stop me,” he practically pleads, face contorting with the strain of fighting his instincts.

I can almost feel it as if those instincts are my own, base needs leaving me wanton as I heed the primal call of my body’s urges. I gulp hard, swallowing the last bit of semblance I had to fight the need to cross this bridge.

“I don’t want to,” I breathe, shaking my head slowly and gathering the courage to lift myself on my elbows. “I am your mate, right?” I whisper, the words leaving my lips with natural conviction that I don’t need to dig deep for. “You may do as you please with me.”

Flynn lets out a heavy breath, as if the air in his lungs was constricting his throat while he waited for my consent. He steps forward, planting himself between my thighs as he reaches out to cup my breasts.

The full mounds fit perfectly into his large hands, the nubs growing erect beneath his palms thanks to the heat exuding from his flesh. A look of utter desperation crosses his face as he parts his lips and exhales with relief.

“I have wanted to feel them for so long…” he sighs, eyes flicking to my breasts while he squeezes and kneads the supple peaks. When he meets my gaze again, he appears drunk as he sucks in a breath through his teeth.

I hadn't realized I'd wanted to hear those words and see his reaction for so long, to know that I wasn’t crazy for ever sensing that he wanted me even when his brutal words suggested otherwise. His pining tone and the longing in his eyes right now make up for the past. And when he pinches my swollen nipples between two fingers, sending wave after wave of pleasure rushing through me, I close my eyes and surrender fully.

My back arches off the bed, craning for his touch when he tugs at my nipples and releases. My eyelids fly open, gasping from the loss of sensation, only to find him staring at me, waiting for me to watch his every move.

“Flynn,” I murmur under my breath, like a prompt for him to go ahead and do whatever he wants with me. I can’t contain how desperate I feel right now, arousal thrumming through my veins and turning my mind hazy.

With his dark gaze penetrating my soul, Flynn sinks a hand between my breasts and travels his fingers down, over every bump and curve of my torso until he settles between my thighs.

“Ooh,” he breathes when a long, dexterous finger coasts my folds.

My body shudders, instinctively curling toward his touch, craving so much more than this torment of his teasing when his lips curl with a devilish smirk.

“Flynn…” I call out breathlessly, grabbing fistfuls of the sheet on either side of me with the frustration I feel.

The wait is unbearable, especially when he chuckles low and removes his hand from between my thighs. With a frown, tugging my brows together, I watch as he undoes the first two buttons on his shirt to reveal his chest before crouching between my thighs. Grazing fingertips coerce my thighs to part further before he drapes each one over his shoulders. All I can see is the top half of his face as it disappears between my thighs, his eyes fixed on mine as he takes a deep breath.

“So fucking wet,” he praises, the smack of his lips resounding when he anticipatedly licks them.

All I can do is nod slowly, watching as he makes the final descent of his head and latches his lips over my bundle of nerves.

“Ah!” I squirm, the sensation so powerful it ignites every nerve ending in my body. Flynn calms me with strong hands clasping my thighs as he vacuums his cheeks and sucks on my clit.

A chorus of moans that escalate toward screams falls from my lips as he devours my essence and laps and licks at every drop of arousal my womanhood excretes. The sound of his delighted hums mingles with those moans, creating an ambiance of unwavering pleasure that only climbs higher when he adds a finger to his ministrations and enters my aching hole.

Aching because I desperately need the friction, and I buck my hips in search of that gratification. It only compels Flynn to pull his lips off me with a lewd “pop”, swiftly gathering my thighs and throwing me further up the bed.

He’s so strong, able to lift me like a feather despite my size. I only realize why when he begins removing his shirt, pulling it down his bulging arms made of pure, steely muscle.

Good Lord…

I lose my breath when I trace my gaze over the impressive ripple of muscles of his torso, where creamy skin pulls taut on his abs. The tribal tattoo on his right arm darkens as if it has a life of its own while he removes the rest of his clothes and steps forward, his magnificent body godlike.

I don’t even want to pinch myself anymore, in case I wake up from this perfect fantasy. I can only try to calm my breathing as he climbs onto the bed and settles between my thighs. He leans in and crushes his lips to mine, feeding me with the breath I need to survive.

When the swollen tip of his erection nudges at my entrance, I grab his shoulders for stability as he slowly enters me. The delicious stretch has me gasping, digging crescent moons into his shoulder blades with my nails.

“Flynn!” I cry out against his lips, the pressure between my thighs exhilarating and not nearly enough at the same time. My heart beats so quickly I’m not even sure if I’m going to survive, our bodies aligned and united intrinsically.

The pleasure that courses through me is too much, muddling my mind as tears escape the corners of my eyes. I don’t know where I end or begin, only that I cannot think of anything else besides the way his cock fills my essence to the brim with every powerful stroke.

Flynn grunts as he bites my bottom lip and grazes his teeth over the skin so wildly, he almost draws blood. It’s so primal and raw, it has me clawing my nails down his back as he fucks me even deeper.

An inner voice I can barely give my attention to chants the word “mate” repeatedly, but it’s only because Flynn is completing the mating ritual by consummating our union.

Our clambering toward the height of climax only means that we’re nearing the moment when he’ll mark my neck possessively. He’ll lay his claim to me when he comes, and there’s no going back from it.

It’s not that I mind. Earlier today, I wanted to escape him. But now that he’s balls deep inside me, I can never see myself anywhere but here, in his arms.

It doesn’t even matter if I receive my wolf or not. This is all the connection I need to the werewolf realm, to be connected to the Alpha of the Blood Moon Pack. Maybe this is what the Moon Goddess was trying to tell me when She prevented me from leaving.

Maybe I was never meant to have a wolf.

I make peace with the notion, my eyes closed as I’m lost in a deep space of pure bliss. Flynn’s thrusts grow shallower, his grunts and moans getting louder just as my walls contract and squeeze his cock inside me. He groans deeply, spilling out hot ropes in my depths while fucking me through my high. I feel his hot breath on my face and part my lips in anticipation of his kiss, until he suddenly stops thrusting and becomes silent. My eyelids snap open in confusion, only to find him tensed over me.

“Flynn…?" I ask when I can barely hear the sound of him breathing. “Flynn?” I ask with more sternness, lifting a hand to touch his cheek.

As soon as my fingertips make contact with his skin, he gasps and snaps out of the daze he’d been in. His eyes return to their natural gold color, horror washing over his face.

“No…it can’t be…” he shakes his head, quickly scrambling off the bed while he stares at me accusingly. He grabs his pants and quickly dresses, not softening the glare of daggers he throws me.

This time, my heart pounds from fear as he frowns at me. Why does he wear a look of deep regret?

Was having sex with me such a big mistake?

All I know is that I feel crushed as I watch him storm out of the bedroom without a single glance back. I feel like I’ve just been used as all the emotions I’d been hiding behind those walls I built come raining down on me.

The shattering of my heart as tears flow from my eyes isn’t worth the fleeting moment of passion we just shared. I should have known better than to cave to my baser desires. Now, it’s too late. I’ve crossed a bridge there’s no coming back from.’