Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22

1 Week Later

DAMON

I was homeschooled because my father decided it would be easiest while I was training with my brothers. He refused to have a dumb as rocks son, though, so he hired tutors for me.

A few didn’t last very long, but the one that did was my favorite. I lived for that one on one time, though I pretended to be bored. Mr. Mills was let go on my eighteenth birthday, and Dad told me I was done with school. I don’t know how my education is going to measure up with college courses.

Jed bought another car last week when it became obvious that it would be needed. Today is the first day of classes, and he and Kane are planning their campaign to speak to the Minnesota families.

People hate what they fear, and we’ve made a reputation for being insane motherfuckers who will only heel for Rock. It’s what my father wanted us to project. He was the boss after all.

Dad hasn’t once reached out to us, and the break has been nice. A part of me doesn’t believe that it’ll last very long. I’m trying to stay positive though.

My backpack is filled with a notebook, a new mini laptop to take notes, and pencils. My books are back at the rental, because I didn’t want to lug them today. I’m not sure if I’ll need them for classes, and a lot of professors have their lectures online.

I feel in control over my new adventure, but Adira is the one variable I can’t control. I don’t know how she’ll react when she sees me. There are a lot of ways this could go.

Opening the doorway to the building of my first class, I know she’s in this science class as well, because Morris told me. It’s a freshman course necessary for graduation, so if I wasn’t who I am, I could pretend it’s accidental that I’m there.

Unfortunately, that’s not possible.

Sucking in my bottom lip under my teeth, I stalk through the halls, hoping to at least get a glimpse of my girl. I’m not sure how far I want to push this yet, so I’m allowing fate to decide.

If Adira wasn’t currently shutting down the bond as much as she is, she’d be able to feel me. However, her choice is going to be the reason for her surprise.

It’s difficult for me to force the bond closed, and sometimes I can’t do it. How the hell is she doing this?

I want to wrap myself around the little omega, force her to pay attention to me, because I’m the only one who can be under her skin right now. It feels cruel for her to do this, and I decide what my play will be.

I follow the other students inside, noting their reaction to me. Some of the omegas swoon, and fuck me if some of the male alphas do too.

I keep to myself, so I don’t often notice people’s reactions to me. I’ve been in a funk recently, so my facial hair is growing in. Jed told me that I needed to clean it up if I was going to keep the ‘animal growing on my face.’

My oldest brother is an asshole, but he was right. It’s now a well groomed animal on my face.

Fucker.

I’m wearing what I imagine any college kid would. However, I’m getting so many looks, it’s making me self conscious. Dark wash jeans, a long-sleeved henley shirt, and a black coat thrown over it all feels like a normal outfit. Combat boots on my feet round out what I’m wearing.

Why are they all staring?

Finding a seat in the middle of the room, I plant my ass in it, pulling off my backpack to find my laptop. I can feel her before I see her, and I take my time placing my computer in front of me. Slowly looking up, I take a breath as the little omega gazes around the room to find a seat.

The space is beginning to fill up. Her beautiful, dark brown hair is gleaming in its long braid over her shoulder. Adira is wearing jeans with tall black boots, a pink hooded cable knit sweater, and a deep blue jacket. Fuck if she doesn’t look perfect.

I hear a few omegas near me whimper as I release pheromones, but I can’t fucking help it. Unfortunately, Adira’s head snaps over her shoulder as she’s shrugging off her jacket, and her eyes narrow at me. Giving her an innocent smile, I wave my fingers lazily at her.

It’s not the romantic meet cute I was hoping for, but let’s be honest. I was never going to get that. Raw, needy, animalistic attraction is just as good.

“ Why are you here?” she mouths and I shrug as if I can’t understand her.

Patting the open spot next to me, I mouth back, “ Come sit with me.”

Shaking her head, she turns and faces the front of the room like the good little omega that she is, just as the teacher walks in.

“If she doesn’t want you, I’d be more than willing to climb you like a tree,” an omega purrs, leaning against me.

Pulling the collar of my shirt to the side, I shake my head. “We’re having a disagreement,” I grunt. “She already marked me as hers. You know omegas are territorial. Would you like your eyes scratched out?”

I don’t even glance at her as I make sure my laptop is on and that I’m connected to the school internet. I would never fuck around on Adira.

Her huge sigh and complaints under her breath are wasted on me as I keep my attention at the front of the room. Once I have the syllabus, lecture notes, and an empty document open for my own personal use, I’m ready.

“Welcome to Biology class,” Professor Royal says warmly as he stands at the front of the class. “This is a fairly straightforward course with a midterm and final. I don’t keep track of attendance, but know that sometimes the things I talk about in the lecture won’t always follow the lectures online. That said, skip class at your own risk. Let’s begin!”

Paying attention as he lectures, I make notes in my open document of things that aren’t on the lecture online. I also rewrite things in ways I’ll better understand them, so it’ll stick with me.

The class is more enjoyable than I thought it would be, and while I don’t think I’ll become a biologist, it’s a good class.

Professor Wilhelm Royal has a way with words, helping me to better understand each slide as he lectures. My eyes move to the little omega quickly packing up her things at the end of class, and I grab my bag and toss everything in. I see a notebook, pencil, and lecture sheets in front of her, but no computer.

I immediately want to give her mine. I close my bag and sling it over my shoulder, watching her in a predatory manner as I slowly begin stalking her down the aisle. I haven’t seen her in two weeks, since just after the auction.

I hardly count that as quality time with my omega.

I know why she doesn’t want to see me, every single reason is valid. I’m tired of her shutting me out. The devil is in the details, and I didn’t have any knowledge of it, until I was standing there watching what Morris and the alphas were doing to her.

We’re all wrecked over how badly things went. The only way she’s going to stop ignoring me is exposure therapy. That’s what I’m telling myself. I know starting over isn’t possible, but I want her to see the ‘me’ who isn’t just my Father’s Demon.

I’m still learning who that is.

My steps are slow as I walk lazily down the stairs on her side of the auditorium, but my long legs and hops take me to her quickly.

“Adira,” I whisper as she struggles to get out of the row where she was sitting. People move for me, but my little omega isn’t as scary as I am.

Maybe she’ll learn to sit on the outside of the aisle next time. Her view was perfect where she was, though. I hope she’ll simply learn that I’ll always catch her like the little rabbit my brother says she is.

Wrapped around her finger, we are.

“Go away,” Adira grunts as she finds me in her way. “You’ve been hiding in your hole so well. Why are you here?”

“I’m a student,” I drawl, enjoying the way her pupils enlarge. Fuck, why do I so enjoy the way fear fills her eyes?

Be normal, dammit.

“Impossible,” she mutters, putting her hand on my chest and pushing me back.

I’m not going anywhere I don’t want to go, Adira.

Slowly, vindictively, my feet scrape backward until I give her just enough room to squeeze by. I want to feel her body, smell her sweet scent as she walks by.

“Dick,” she sighs, moving to get past me. Inhaling deeply, I groan as the scent of snickerdoodles and frosting hit my senses.

“Call me whatever you want, but I really fucking miss you,” I tell her.

Adira nearly trips, her hands gripping my coat to keep from pitching down the stairs. I keep my hands to myself, not trusting myself not to crush her to my body.

“You can’t say that,” she hisses.

“And yet I did, you can stop icing me out and feel for yourself,” I say. “How are you doing that anyway?”

“Meditation,” Adira says. “I can’t always tell the difference between what you’re feeling and what I am. I needed the distance to be able to distinguish between the two.”

Someone behind her clears their throat because we’re in their way. I gently lift Adira with my hands on her hips to walk down three steps and slip into a now empty row of chairs.

“Thanks, man,” the beta says as he walks by and I shrug. I didn’t completely move for him. I didn’t want him to yell at Adira.

I was doing it for the sake of keeping the peace on my first day of classes.

“So clarity?” I ask. “Look, I know everything is blowing up, and I will never turn my back on the guys. We rise and fall together. However, you and I are forever. Find your space, but it feels like this deep, dark hole is inside of me when you go dark, Adira.”

We’re talking in hushed voices, and she gazes up at me with her big, midnight blue eyes.

“Fuck,” she sighs, making me blink. That sounds like such a dirty word from her sweet mouth. “You’re not playing fair, Damon.”

“I’m not here to play fair,” I growl. “I’m playing for keeps. I want forever, and part of that means giving you a legitimate future. I’m here for more reasons than just to stalk you. It’s a fun perk, though.”

“Pretty words for someone who says he doesn’t like omegas or attachment,” Adira says.

“Oh, baby, I don’t like anyone,” I remind her. “You’re on the very short list of people who have my heart, and the only one who is an omega.”

“Your what?” she asks with wide eyes as I guide her back toward the stairs. I have her schedule memorized, and she has another class soon.

“My heart and my knot are yours,” I murmur. “Romance is a foreign language to me, I don’t do pretty words, and most of my humanity has been trained out of me, Adira. But, I know that it feels as if I’m being ripped in two whenever you’re sad or numb.”

“I feel numb because the alternative makes me want to rock in a corner and scream,” she says as we walk out of the classroom. “I have to be able to function and work.”

“I don’t like that you’re working so late,” I grumble. At her sharp glare, I shrug. “I know Morris is following you home, but I still don’t like it.”

“He told you about his new hobby, hmm?” she asks as we walk.

“Jed caught him sneaking back in,” I admit.

Adira’s snort is adorable, and my lips twitch as I take a mental snapshot of what she looks like right now. The hours between when I’ll get to see her next are long. She sighs, rubbing her side, and I know she can feel what I am.

“You actually feel happy,” she grumbles.

“Seeing how adorable you look makes me feel that way,” I tell her. “Sometimes I dream about how different things could have been, but I always wake up wistful afterwards. I haven’t had a dream in years.”

Adira stumbles as she listens to me, swallowing hard. “I’m terrified to dream,” she says. “I work until I fall into bed exhausted, hoping I’ll be greeted by blackness.”

“I’ll chase them away,” I say, my hand still on the base of her back. Her body is warm, and I pretend not to see how many eyes are on us. Nothing else matters.

“Everything my brothers and I are doing is to keep you safe. It sounds lame, but?—”

Growling in discontent because eyes mean people listening, I grab the first door that’ll open, pulling her in with me.

“This is a closet,” she complains as I close the door behind us. It’s dark, and I push her against the wall, my arms caging her in.

“I don’t want anyone to hear what I have to say,” I rasp. “Jed is barking at anyone who even breathes a suicidal or violent thought, because he can hear and feel them all. He’s staging a coup, Adira. Rock will be dead very soon. You’ll be safe from him. Then the ball is in your court.”

“What if I don’t want to play the meek little omega?” she asks, shoving at my chest. Adira is pitching a fit, and I’ll let her.

Dropping my head to rub my cheek against hers, scent marking her like a cat, I purr.

“Then climb on the train of insanity where intrusive thoughts win, and join us,” I tell her. “You can help cut Dad’s heart out, but I should warn you that a little blood may make me want to fuck you in it.”

Whimpering, she perfumes, and I groan, dropping to my knees.

“This is so fucked up,” she whines. “Why is this what turns me on? I thought nothing would ever make me aroused again.”

“Your panties are soaked, aren’t they? God, they have to be,” I growl. My arms lock around her waist and I rub my face against her stomach. “There’s no right or wrong for what you feel. You could be asexual for the rest of your life, and I’d still ask you to cuddle. Your body is yours.”

Her fingers play with my hair, her chest slightly heaving as she rubs her legs together.

“You’d get tired of not fucking me,” Adira says softly.

“Biology would pull us together to fuck,” I correct her. “You’re the fucking boss, though. The guys will figure out how to earn your forgiveness. They’re on their own there. You’re too precious to let slip away, Adira. We all hurt you so much. Punish me, hit me, do whatever you want. I’ll take it.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she wails. “Sometimes, I do, but I’m not a bad person!”

“What the fuck does bad or good have to do with anything?” I growl. “I can’t erase the auction, none of us can. I will walk through fire for you to prove myself. While I’m doing that, promise me that you know you’re fucking perfect. The rage, sadness, laughter, none of it is wrong. If you cream your panties thinking about how pretty Dad’s blood will look outside of his body, then I’ll be jealous I can’t watch.”

“Damon,” Adira pants. “I shouldn’t want this.”

“Tell me,” I say instead, dropping my head back even though it’s dark in the room and I can’t see her clearly. “Do you want to carve your revenge in his flesh, baby?”

“Yes,” she gasps, shuddering.

“No repercussions,” I promise her. “I’ll make sure the guys know to make it happen. Take care of yourself.”

My backpack is hanging from my shoulder as I slowly get to my feet. I quietly open it, fisting her hair and kissing her to serve as a distraction. Adira whines into my mouth, making me grunt as I drag open the zipper of her own bag to put my laptop in it.

I can feel her body stiffening against me, she’s going to fucking bolt. I barely have a chance to close her backpack silently before she’s ducking under my arm to break the kiss.

“You can’t walk into my life and promise the world,” she yells angrily, already by the door as I lean my shoulder against the wall. It’ll hide my open bag when she storms out.

“I just did,” I say smugly. “The world, my remorse, my love. All of it is yours, Adira. Break it, stomp on it, the end result is still the same. It may be a bit more bruised, but it doesn’t change anything. Make your life your own, find things that bring you joy, so you can share it with me.”

“Why are you so damn perfect now,” Adira asks. “It’s too little, too late.”

“It’s whatever you want it to be,” I say cryptically. “Telling you I didn’t know is a cop out. An auction is demeaning and immoral all the same. You’re what I give a damn about. Get to know who I am outside of the bullshit. If you want to throw me away then fine.”

“It’s not that easy,” she says, opening the door angrily. “I can’t wave a magic wand to go back in time.”

“Then be brave enough to face where we are now,” I say, knowing it’s unfair. I’m fighting for my life, and fighting dirty is something I am well acquainted with.

My words are met with the shutting of a door, and I slump to the ground when I hear sobs as she moves away. I can feel it as well now and I groan.

“I’m sorry I’m not a better man and alpha,” I whisper as a tear falls from my eye. This is certainly something new.

Apologies and tears are apparently a thing I’m doing now. Awesome.