8. Round 10

8

ROUND 10

Paige

I t’s been three weeks of Willo and me dancing around each other. We text each other on and off each day and have had evenings where we speak on the phone for hours. But in person, neither of us has made any form of move.

If anything, we’ve developed a strong friendship. Willo has opened up about his late wife and their relationship. He’s talked about how even though they found themselves as teenage parents, there was never any question they wouldn’t be together—until Cara died.

Willo has spoken little about the accident or the aftermath, just that he hasn’t felt ready to move forward for a while. I’d love to think this means he’s ready to move forward now, but then I remind myself I’m on a man sabbatical.

Marj tells me I’m being too hard on myself and I need to work out if it’s a relationship I want or just sex. She was pretty blunt. That’s the thing though, I think I’d like to have sex with Willo, but not because he’s pressuring me into it, but because I have these recurring feelings and desires. It’s not just when I’m near him or talking to him, but when I think about him and my nipples pebble. It’s an unfamiliar experience for me, that’s for sure.

It’s not something I can tell him when I’m with him, though. I mean, how would I? ‘Hey Willo, just wondering, down to fuck?’ I’ve never felt this before, this desire for someone to actually get to know them and their body. I want to trace each muscle on Willo’s body, well aware that that will take some time. I want to bring him pleasure and for him to do the same to me.

But it’s perhaps not something he’s on board with. We’ve got an amazing friendship going, and it would be horrible to ruin it. Plus, my visa is only valid until the end of the year. Then I’m back to New York, and Willo will be here. With his kids.

See, that’s another thing. I don’t mind his kids. I wouldn’t go as far as saying I want kids of my own, but his seem nice. Sweet even. I’m not sure how to take the oldest one, but the younger two seem pretty fun.

Last week, I had dinner with Debbie and her family to celebrate the success that was the Field Day we were involved with. Her kids are a little older than Willo’s, but they also didn’t act as if I was a weirdo from another planet.

There’s a difference between wanting kids of my own and relating to kids that are someone else’s, and I think I can do the latter. I still don’t know how to start a conversation apart from asking how school went, and I wouldn’t know the first thing about what kids are into. I mean, I know Luna loves Disney princesses, but I did too at her age. Willo comes as a package deal, and even if we remain friends, friends do things with families.

Our Monday routine is to meet up at the bistro for lunch before recording the podcast. We’ve had no more episodes of having to record at Willo’s place, and I haven’t bumped into his family at the shops again.

I legitimately had a prior with Debbie that night, but there hasn’t been an invitation to dinner since. It’s not something I’ve pushed, either.

I’ve learnt so much about Aussie Rules and now consider myself a fan. The Monarchs are sitting second on the ladder, having only lost two games. I haven’t been to a game since the game with the WAGs, but Willo is insistent I join his mother and kids in the family area this Saturday afternoon as they take on their archrivals, the Peninsula Panthers. It’s definitely not something I fought him on.

Maybe he wanted me to, but I’m looking forward to spending time with his mother and kids again.

“You look like a rockstar.” Brittany is on my laptop screen as I prepare to head to the game.

“The jeans are okay?” I turn so she can see that my bum looks massive in them.

“Sexy AF,” my bestie replies. “You look hot. Purple is your colour, and that sweater really highlights the girls.” That’s what I’m worried about. The sweater is tighter than I would like over my breasts. “And don’t even think about changing it.”

It’s a cool day and has been drizzling on and off. I suspect Willo will be pleased there’s at least a bit of rain for the farm. I know Debbie’s been complaining about how dry it’s been.

“How about I wear my black trench just because it’s wet?” I ask Brittany.

“Sounds good. But don’t take off that jumper. Or not until you and Lover Boy are alone.” Brittany wiggles her eyebrows.

She knows how much I like him. I’ve spent hours pouring out my heart to her. Maybe it’s time I tell him and hope he doesn’t run a mile.

My cab drops me at the ground, and I head for the family entrance. I almost know where I’m going when I’m here now.

“Paige.” I hear an excited scream across the car park and turn to see Luna running towards me. “You’re here. Daddy said you might be.”

Might be. Did he think I wouldn’t show? I’m wondering what vibes I’ve given off and whether I haven’t been clear that I’ll be here for him.

“Hello, sweetheart.” I bend down and stroke her hair. It seems a natural thing to do .

“My name’s Luna, remember?” she reminds me as she wraps her arms around my waist.

“Hi, Jackson. Hi, Billy.” I greet the two boys as they come up behind their sister.

“Did you remember their names and not mine?” Luna places her hands on her hips, and I try not to laugh. How this kid thinks I could forget her, or her name, is beyond me.

“Look, Gaga, it’s Paige.” Luna waves to her grandmother, who is accompanied by another young couple.

“Hi, Mrs Lovemore.” I smile in greeting, even though I feel like I’m being judged. What if she doesn’t like me and doesn’t think I’m a good influence on her son?

“It’s Lenore, remember?” She beams as she grips my upper arm and places a kiss on my cheek. “Now, these are my twins, Eva and Thomas.”

“It’s Auntie Charlene and Uncle Tina,” Jackson corrects her.

My brows knit together in confusion.

“When I had the scan, it showed I was having two girls. We told their older siblings that Eva and Christina were in my tummy. When Thomas came out as a boy, Murray, my third child, insisted on calling him Tina, and it’s stuck. Eva, well…” She sighs and shakes her head, a smirk on her face. “She’s a mechanic, and back in the day, the mechanic on the TV show, Neighbours , was called Charlene, and it’s stuck, too.”

“Meh. I don’t care. Just don’t call me late for lunch.” Charlene extends a hand, a warm smile on her face. “And beware, they thought Tina was a girl because they couldn’t see anything down there. He’s a human Ken doll.”

“Shut up.” Tina holds out his hand, his lips curved up and his eyes full of life. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”

There’s no doubt Tina is related to Willo. He has the same solid build, dark wavy hair, and brown eyes. Charlene shares her mother’s petite features but has a mop of blonde curly hair that flows freely around her head.

Luna has gripped my hand as we walk towards the entrance. I find myself not minding the closeness and even give her hand a squeeze. I’ve met her merely a handful of times, and yet, she’s decided I’m someone she wants to be close to. It’s such a strange experience. This child has a sway over me, and I feel mildly protective.

Luna can’t see that I’m a hot mess who can’t stop herself from being used by men. She doesn’t know about Sydney and the humiliation I experienced. Marj argues I stayed in Australia because I knew I could get past the mortification I felt at Lyle’s words broadcast to the world.

In many ways, I have. It’s helped me grow and learn that I am worthy of desire and respect, and all the things Marj has convinced me of. It also shows that I’m able to say no to people and to put myself first. Sure, I’m having issues with that still, and I stayed back late at work yesterday finishing something I should have admitted that I didn’t have time to add to my schedule.

“Daddy wears number four, and I’ve got a number four on my back, like Billy and Jacko. I’m four, but I’m almost five.” Luna waves her free arm in the air as she speaks.

“Yeah, Dad’s really good at football.” Jackson has come up on my other side. He’s holding a small football, which he bounces on the ground in front of him.

“He is.” I nod.

“Uncle Muz is looking after the sheep. You should meet him too.” Jackson continues his rhythmic ball bouncing.

“Nah. She’s met me now, Jacko.” Tina ruffles his nephew’s hair, the same way I’ve seen Willo do it.

“Come on. Let’s get inside.” Lenore is all smiles as she holds the door open for us before Tina takes it from her.

Lenore is short in stature, but big in personality. Her hair may be grey and trimmed into a neat bob, but she doesn’t give off the vibes of a woman past her prime. If anything, it’s the opposite.

We make our way to the room where I met the wives and girlfriends.

“Paige.” Bel’s voice is bright as she sees me exit the elevator. “I’m so glad you’re here again. Lovemores, hello. My gang is inside, and Lenore, Matty’s parents are here, too.”

The kids run off to see their friends. Inside the room, it is hard to hear people because of all the laughter and chatter going on. Angelique is here, a chubby baby on her hip. She greets me as she rushes past to solve an argument over toys her older children are having. I can’t see Jenna, but she told me she’ll be here.

Charlene and Tina are catching up with people they know, and Lenore is chatting to an older couple, possibly Matty’s parents. I feel like an outsider, an interloper who doesn’t belong. It’s not like I’m a family member, and I’m not a girlfriend. I’m not even sure why I’m here.

This sense of not belonging is almost overwhelming. I contemplate turning and leaving, but Bel is still at the door greeting people, and the game starts in less than half an hour. I want to watch it. After all, I need to know what happens so I can talk about it on the podcast this week.

“There you are. Here.” Jenna greets me with a kiss on my cheek and shoves a glass of white wine in my hand. “These family games are loud and rowdy, especially when you don’t have kids of your own.”

“I just feel like I don’t really belong. I’m not a WAG or a family member.” I take a sip of the wine, alright, a gulp. It is crisp, and I almost moan as it slides down my throat.

“You’re a friend. Willo hasn’t had many of those outside the club for a very long time.” Jenna waves her hand in the air. Whilst it’s comforting to know she thinks I should be here, I still have doubts.

Someone comes and is introduced as the girlfriend of one of the other players. The two talk fashion, and I excuse myself. I’ve finished that glass of wine too quickly, and I need to put some food in my stomach to stop the alcohol from taking full effect.

There are trays of mini meat pies and what I know as sausage rolls—sausage meat surrounded in flaky pastry. They’re quite nice.

Charlene is standing in the corner typing furiously into her phone. I head over to join her with some of the savoury pastries on a small plate.

I stand there as she types away and notice her wipe a tear from her eye.

“Oh, hey. I didn’t see you there,” she says, a smile that I assume is fake plastered on her face.

“Pie?” I offer.

She takes one and downs it in two bites. “Fucking men.” Her smile is gone. “That was Brad complaining I hadn’t made him lunch for work today. He hates it when I come and see my nephews and niece.”

I say nothing, instead, I nibble on a sausage roll. I don’t know who Brad is, but I assume he’s her husband after I notice the rings on her left hand. The siren sounds, indicating the umpires are taking the field and the players won’t be too far behind.

Putting my plate down on a side table, I follow Charlene outside, and we take a seat in the stand. “Where’s Tina?” I ask.

“He’ll be chatting someone up.” Charlene lifts one side of her face. “He may be lucky, and there might be a sister here today. He knows most of the WAGs and wouldn’t hit on them.”

Lenore sits on the other side of me.

Billy comes through and sits next to his aunt. I turn and see Bel and Angelique and their kids sitting behind me, Jackson and Luna with them.

I feel welcome in this space, but I still don’t feel like I belong. I’m not like these people, and I speak funny as Luna likes to remind me, albeit with a smile.

The game has started, and you can feel the tension in the stadium. There appears to be more talking happening on the field, and not between the players on the same side. I see Willo grab the neck of the jumper of an opposition player before Matty comes in to calm him down.

Scoring is low, and pressure is being applied by both sides. After three-quarter time, the heavens open, and rain pelts the ground. No spectators move, but those who aren’t lucky enough to be under cover like we are don ponchos.

The ball comes sailing down the wing in front of us, and Jenna’s partner, Wilson Marks, launches himself into the air, his knees on the shoulders of the opposition player, bringing down the ball against his chest.

“Marks, marks!” the crowd cheer.

Willo had taught me early on that players don’t catch the ball in Aussie Rules, they mark it. One commentator famously screamed ‘Marks, marks’ in Wilson’s first game, and it is now a crowd cheer.

“Is that what they call a specky?” I turn to the WAGs sitting behind me.

“Specky, screamer, hanger.” Bel nods.

“Mark of the Year,” Angelique adds.

It’s a boost to the side, who gets the ball to Willo, who marks straight in front of the goal, about twenty meters out. I need to ask him about playing in the rain. Perhaps we can talk about it on this week’s show. Willo threads the ball through the middle of the goal posts, and the crowd goes wild. It’s the first time the Monarchs have led by over six points, meaning the Panthers will need to kick two unanswered goals to win the game.

The clock ticks down, and the Panthers get the ball to their end. It’s scrappy play, and everyone is desperate to grab the ball. Somehow, a Panthers’ player grabs it from the pack and snaps it onto his boot, seeing it sail through the goal posts. The margin is now five points. There are three minutes left on the clock. The rain has cleared, but the ground is still wet.

Matty has the ball in the centre and takes a step before being wrapped in a tackle. The umpire declares it to be holding the ball. The crowd goes wild with anger, booing the umpire’s decision. “He had prior opportunity,” Charlene whispers next to me.

It’s such a strange rule, and I still don’t fully understand it. The ball is kicked into the Panthers’ scoring zone. It seems all Monarchs’ players are down that end of the ground except for Silver, who’s in the middle by himself, his opponent having made his way to the offensive end.

Someone snaps, but the ball is offline, heading through for a point. It’s a four-point game. Basha kicks the ball in, but it’s not marked by a Monarchs’ player. The Panthers again gain ground with the ball, despite the Monarchs’ pressure to stop ball movement.

Once again, a Panthers’ player snaps, but Basha is there and gets a hand to the ball, meaning despite it going through the goal posts, a behind—or a point—is scored, as it was off hands.

There’s less than a minute on the clock. If a behind, or point, is scored, the opposition gets to kick the ball back into play. It’s only after a goal that the ball goes back to the centre of the ground. Most players can kick the ball about fifty meters. There’s talk around me about how the ball is wet and harder to kick. You wouldn’t know it from the way Basha kicks it. I’m not sure if a gust of wind catches it, or what, but the ball sails close to seventy meters, straight over the heads of all the players who have merged into that end of the ground.

What’s more, it heads straight for Silver, who stands alone in the centre square. Even though he doesn’t mark it, he grabs the ball and starts running towards the goals at the other end. He taps it to the ground a few times. I need to ask Willo why he doesn’t bounce it, but I presume it’s because of the weather.

Players from both sides are streaming down the field, but Silver is fast. Someone must warn him that there’s a player on his tail, because about forty meters out from goal, he kicks it, and it goes sailing through, just as the siren sounds to end the game. The Monarchs have won by nine points.

Everyone is on their feet cheering and singing the silly club song. Lenore is wiping tears from her eyes. It’s amazing to see people get so wound up over a game of football.

Panthers supporters leave the ground, but I can see the sea of purple and gold staying put. The players run around the boundary line, slapping hands with fans and handing out small footballs. Some sign autographs. When Willo stops in front of the stand we are sitting in, he looks up and waves, a massive grin on his face .

I know the kiss he blows is for his family, however, I wish it was for me. I wish I was here as a WAG, well, a girlfriend at least, and legitimately part of this huge Monarchs family.

It’s not going to happen, though. Willo talks about his wife a lot, and I know he misses her. I could never replace someone like that.

“Has your heart settled yet, Paige?” Lenore asks me as we head into the function room behind the stand.

“Only just. It was so exciting.” The euphoria from winning is infectious. “I should go, though.”

“No.” Lenore places a hand on my arm. “Stay, please. It will be hard getting out of the car parks for a while yet.”

I end up staying for over an hour. I meet some new people, all of whom have listened to the podcast, and tell me that they can’t wait to hear Willo and me discuss this week’s game. Jenna throws her arms around me, her excitement clear. Some families have gone down to the rooms to be with the players, and I’m glad the Lovemores have stayed put. It’s not that I don’t want to see Willo and congratulate him on another brilliant performance, but I don’t think I could keep my emotions in check, and I’m just as likely to tell him how amazing I think he is.

His skills with the football today were outstanding. I’m sure if he hadn’t been playing, the team would have lost. He says his knee doesn’t hurt at all, but every time someone tackles him, I worry he will get injured again.

Families who have stayed in the function room have started to leave. The ground is all but empty, cleaners coming through and collecting rubbish from the stands.

“I should go,” I tell Charlene, noticing Lenore gathering her grandchildren.

“We’re heading to a Mexican place for dinner. Join us,” Charlene all but pleads.

My heart is screaming yes, but my head prevails, and I know I need to avoid Willo. I’ve sworn off relationships, and Willo is out of bounds. We’re colleagues. Our podcast needs to come first. I need to show that I’m the professional woman who doesn’t sleep with all her coworkers.

“Thanks, but I need to, you know…” My voice trails off. I can’t even invent something I need to be doing instead of seeing Willo.

“Paige is heading off.” Charlene turns to her mother, who has gathered the kids together. “Where’s Tina?”

“He’s outside saying goodbye to someone.” She smirks and shakes her head. “Paige, join us for lunch tomorrow. I’m roasting a joint.”

My mouth drops open, and my face is blank. She’s what now?

“Roast lamb with all the trimmings.” Charlene laughs at my expression.

“I’ll, um, see.” I try to sound noncommittal, but I am intrigued by the sound of lunch.

“Don’t go, Paige.” Luna grabs my hand and tugs at it as she jumps on the spot. “Come and have tacos.”

“I can’t, sweetheart. Maybe another night?” I don’t know where the term of endearment comes from.

I make my goodbyes and wave at Tina as I get into the lift. He’s talking with a beautiful?-?looking woman. She reminds me I’m not the type of woman Lovemore men would go for. Willo deserves to be with someone who will look as good as he does, not a fat frump with wayward hair.

Pushing the door to leave the stadium, I’m glad the rain has stopped. I bring up a ride-share app and go to order a car.

There aren’t many people about, and I head outside the ground to the pickup point. I’m distracted, as I discover there aren’t many cars available and am choosing if I want to order a luxury car or wait an hour for a cheaper option.

“Whoa.” I look up as I’m about to crash into a wall of muscle.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” I apologise as I try to regain control of the phone that threatens to jump out of my hands. The guy saves it as it slips from my grip.

He’s gorgeous. Well over six feet tall with dark, curly hair. He’s wearing a black-and-yellow jacket, the colours of the Panthers and carrying a sports bag .

“I know that voice. You’re The Yank.” He hands me my phone. He’s closer than he needs to be and doesn’t let go of the device, leaving us tethered to each other through a small piece of electronics. I can’t help but stare into his blue eyes.

“I’m Paige, yeah.” He releases his grip, and I step backwards, eager to put some space between us.

“I’m Ricky, Ricky Faith.” He smiles, and I yearn to ask him what toothpaste he uses, because his teeth sparkle.

“I’ve heard of you.” I bite my lower lip as I try to hide a smile.

Ricky has been in the news a bit lately, and even though he plays for an opposing club, it’s hard to avoid the drama he’s been involved in. A few weeks back, he got into a bar fight, and the Panthers suspended him for a game. Many said it should have been longer. Rumour has it he’s on his last warning.

“As I tell all the pretty girls, you gotta have faith.” The smile never leaves his face. “Here.” He takes my phone again and holds it up to my face to open. “I’m putting my number in here. You call me anytime, babe.”

I shake my head as he hands my phone back, noticing he’s called himself, giving him my number. “Yeah, see, I don’t have to have faith at all. In fact, I have faith in the Monarchs.”

“Yeah. The family side.” It’s Ricky’s turn to shake his head. “I don’t know if I’d ever fit in at a club like that. But hey, if you’re up for some fun, give us a call.”

With his reputation preceding him, I know Ricky should give me the creeps, but it’s nice to feel desired.

“Paige.” I hear my name being called and turn to see Willo striding towards me. He looks pissed.

“Hey, Willo. Great game again.” I reach out and touch his arm as he approaches. My touch is almost ignored as his jaw looks clenched, and his nostrils are flaring. “You know Ricky?”

“Faith.” Willo is curt as he nods towards the opposition player.

“Your family isn’t too far behind me.” I gesture towards the way I’d come from .

“Um, yeah.” Willo seems flustered. Ricky looks smug, his arms crossed in front of him.

“I’ll leave you boys to it then. Nice meeting you, Ricky. I’ll see you Monday, Willo.” I turn on my heel and start heading away.

“Wait, Paige.” I spin back to see Willo looking at me, his breaths fast as he rubs his hand over his mouth. “You’re not joining us for dinner?”

“I’ve got…” I scrunch my nose and flap my hand in the air, resting it as if I’m carrying a tray of drinks. The reality is I’ve got nothing on.

“Well, lunch tomorrow then? Please?” Willo looks like a puppy as he pleads with me.

“I’ll see.” I nod and turn back to head towards the pickup spot, hoping my car isn’t too far away.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d think Willo was trying to stake a claim on me. That seems highly improbable, though. He’s told me he’s still trying to process his wife’s death, and he knows my thoughts on relationships.

I’ve got a crush on Willo. At first, I thought I could push it aside, saying he lived on a farm and had kids, both things that I don’t want. But Luna has gotten under my skin, and I really like the kid. Jackson makes me laugh with some of his antics, but I don’t really know Billy at all.

My visa expires at the end of the year, anyway. Jenny has said she could easily have it extended, but I’m not sure. I love Bayview Cove. My little flat is cozy. I’m just not sure what direction I want to take in my life.

It’s all too hard. I’m confused, and I don’t know what I want. My body wants Willo, but my head tells me it’s a pointless exercise.

There’s another couple waiting to be picked up, but they’re engrossed in each other. My phone vibrates in my hand.

Ricky

Didn’t realise you and Lover Boy were a thing. He’s a good man.

I’m not sure if I should reply. I mean, we aren’t a thing.

It’s complicated.

He replies straight away.

Ricky

I think the two of you should talk about sledging on the podcast. See what Willo’s had to face.

Oh yeah? What about you?

Ricky

Most of the things they hurl at me are true, so it never really hits.

You aren’t driving, are you? Like, as you text?

Ricky

Nah. My nan lives right near the ground. I’m staying with her tonight. She thinks I’m an angel. Well, at least a devil who can be redeemed.

A car arrives for the couple in front of me, and I’m suddenly left alone.

Hey, you know people will only have faith in you if you have faith in them. And I don’t mean sexually.

There’s no reply for a few minutes, and then my phone vibrates again, except this time, it’s not Ricky.

Tank

Hey. Sorry if I made things awkward with Faith. Would really love to see you at lunch tomorrow. Mum does a mean roast lamb. Charlene will be here, but I think Tina will head home, as he works tomorrow night.

I bite my bottom lip and read Willo’s message a few times. I was expecting him to frame it around the kids wanting to see me.

It is tempting.

Willo

Awesome. Can I pick you up at eleven? Or get Charlene to pick you up?

Why would his sister get me?

Don’t you trust yourself with me?

Willo

That’s a really good question, and to be honest, I still don’t know the answer, but it’s getting harder and harder to trust myself around you.

I don’t notice that the car I booked has pulled up until the driver beeps his horn. Placing my phone in my purse, I leave Willo on read. My heart is dancing for joy at his almost declaration, but my head is still really wary. I’ve never had to listen to my heart before, as it’s never been involved in any of my flings. This feels new and dangerous. I’m just not sure which one of us is going to get burned at the end of it.