Chapter Three

Keylon regretted his decision to visit his family almost as soon as he stepped through the portal Jarvis had created for him, because he was assaulted.

“I thought you’d forgotten you had a family,” his mother said as she squeezed him hard.

He rolled his eyes and looked up to see his father watching them and smiling fondly. “How could I ever forget about you? You call me once a week.”

“Because if I didn’t, I would never hear from you,” Keylon’s mother said as she leaned back and looked at him. She frowned. “You look tired. Are you sleeping enough?”

“I’m sleeping as much as I can. I’m fine, I promise.”

Keylon was far from fine, but he kept up the pretense as he said hello to his father. Their hug was briefer, and as soon as his father stepped away, Keylon’s mother hooked an arm around him and pulled him forward. “Come on. Cora and Faith are waiting for you. Faith wanted to come along to wait for you, but we convinced her to stay in our rooms.”

“How’s the pregnancy going?”

“Good. She looks like she’s about to pop at any moment, but it’ll still take a while.”

Keylon was happy for his sister and his sister-in-law. They’d wanted children for years, and now they would finally become mothers. His parents were over the moon, especially his mother, and he couldn’t find it in himself to tell her about Winter and that he was planning to break their bond. Her heart would break if she found out that Keylon had to give up his shield and the man he loved.

Keylon’s family knew about the spell Carlyle had cast on the dragons. Keylon had told them as soon as they’d found the first dragon without his memories, and everyone had expected the others to have lost their memories, too. It hadn’t been a surprise to see that was the case when the second dragon had been found.

But Ansley, Penley, and Jarvis had found a way to be happy. Their dragons weren’t the men they’d been before, but they’d fallen in love with them again.

Winter, not so much. There was no way for him to fall in love with Keylon because he couldn’t spend enough time in the same room to make it happen. He barely ate his meals with the others when Keylon was there. When Keylon entered a room and noticed a door slamming shut, he knew it was because Winter had just run away again.

His mother was talking a mile a minute as she guided him through the castle. Keylon nodded at several people he recognized as they walked, and even though this hadn’t been his home in decades, he wondered if maybe he should spend more time here. He didn’t want to leave the other mages before they got rid of Carlyle, but he might think about moving back once that was done. He couldn’t really imagine himself staying at the castle around all the happy couples while he had to deal with meeting a new shield and getting to know them.

It was one of the reasons he was here today. He wouldn’t tell his parents, but he was sure his sister and Faith knew people they could introduce him to. He just needed a few names so he could start looking into different dragons. He wasn’t planning to make any decisions today or even tomorrow.

But the sooner he could free Winter, the better it would be for both of them.

As much as he loved his mother, Keylon was relieved when she finally let go. She pushed open the door to the suite of rooms she and Keylon’s father lived in, and once again, Keylon was assaulted. This time, it was his sister who threw herself into his arms. He hugged her back, closing his eyes and inhaling her familiar scent. She always used the same perfume—green tea. It made Keylon feel like he was home, even though, technically, he wasn’t.

“Were you waiting for the baby to be born to visit?” Cora said as she leaned back and slapped his chest.

“I was actually hoping to get out of diaper duty, which is why I’m here today. I need to visit before the baby’s born.”

Cora scowled and punched him again. Keylon wrapped an arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple, smiling as he did so. He could feel his body relax. Nothing had changed, but at the same time, being here brought him back to before he’d met Alvin. More than that, it felt good to be able to forget all about Carlyle and Winter for a bit.

Not nearly long enough.

Faith started to get up from the chair she was sitting in, but Keylon rushed to her. “Stay there. You look like you’ll tilt forward if you try getting to your feet. I don’t think I’m strong enough to pick you back up,” he teased.

Faith laughed. She and Cora had been together for a long time, and she and Keylon were like brother and sister. Keylon was almost as close to her as he was to Cora.

He was careful as he hugged her sideways. It was the only way to make it work, with her stomach in the way. Keylon didn’t touch it, but he was tempted.

He wanted to keep all ten of his fingers.

“Mom said you looked like you were about to pop, but I didn’t think you’d be this big.”

“If you’re not careful, I’m going to sit on you. We’ll see how big I am then.”

“Well, if you sit on him, he won’t be able to leave,” Cora said as she went to sit next to her wife. “Maybe that’s a good idea. Please, sit on him.”

Keylon sat on Faith’s other side. His mother was flitting around the small kitchen, ordering his father around and getting food out. Keylon would’ve told her it wasn’t necessary, but he didn’t bother. He knew his mother, and she’d feed him even if he’d already eaten.

Since they were busy and not listening to him, he leaned closer to Cora and Faith. “I need to ask you something.”

Faith looked delighted. “What is it? Is it a secret?”

“Not exactly, but I’d like you to keep it to yourselves for now. I don’t want Mom to know about this yet.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Cora murmured.

“That’s because it’s not, but I’ll be all right.”

Keylon had told his family that they’d found Winter. He hadn’t gone into details, so they had no idea how difficult things were. They wanted to see him, but they knew he wasn’t Alvin, and Keylon had managed to convince them to wait. Now, they might never see Alvin again.

“It’s Winter,” Keylon continued. “He wants nothing to do with me, which means I’ll need to break our bond and find another shield.”

Faith pressed a hand against her mouth while Cora stared at Keylon with wide eyes. “That can’t be right,” she said. “Why wouldn’t he want you?”

“Because he’s not Alvin anymore,” Keylon murmured. “I can’t force him to be with me or to be my shield, and I don’t want to. He’s been clear that he wants out of this mess as soon as possible. I was going to ask him to stay until Carlyle was dealt with, but maybe it’s not the best idea. I don’t want Winter to have to fight if he doesn’t want to.”

“He’s your shield. He should fight and protect you, no matter how he feels about you.”

“I’m fine,” Keylon reassured his sister even though he felt anything but fine. “Besides, it’s not like I’m going to do this tomorrow. I just wanted to ask you to start poking around to find me a suitable replacement. I know the bond won’t be as strong, but it’s not like the bond I have with Winter is useful at the moment, so I might as well find someone else.”

Keylon did his best to keep his voice light and act as if he didn’t really care, but his heart was breaking. He didn’t want to give up on Winter. He didn’t want to give up on the love he and Alvin had shared.

That love wasn’t enough. Keylon was the only one who still felt it. The saying that if you love something, you need to set it free was right. Keylon wasn’t going to force Winter to stay. He’d let him go, and Winter would do what he wanted.

“I hate this,” Cora whispered.

Faith took her hand and squeezed. Keylon hated that he was hurting his family, but he didn’t have a choice. His heart was broken, and he didn’t think he’d be able to put it back together. It had been hard after Alvin had vanished, but Keylon had eventually found peace. Winter walking into his life had shattered it again, and he felt lost and like nothing would ever be right again.

That was just a feeling. Keylon was taking the necessary steps to ensure that both he and Winter could eventually be at peace with what was happening. He might not like it, but there was no way out of it.

* * * *

Winter was on his way to the lake when Jarvis found him. Winter had been avoiding him because the man was the leader of the mages, and he was sure Jarvis had noticed the tension between Winter and Keylon. Winter had expected Jarvis to want to talk eventually, which was why he’d been avoiding him.

Winter had been avoiding pretty much everyone except Samuel. Sometimes, he avoided even him because Samuel kept looking at him with disappointment in his expression. Winter knew why he felt that way, but there was nothing he could do about it.

It wasn’t his fault that he couldn’t remember Keylon or the feelings he’d had for him before. It wasn’t his fault that he and Keylon were mage and shield and that he didn’t want that. He wasn’t Alvin, and he never would be. He had a different life and different memories, and Keylon wasn’t part of them. Winter’s place wasn’t here.

But since Samuel wasn’t going anywhere, neither was Winter.

“I know you heard me,” Jarvis said from behind Winter.

Winter was still considering hiding somewhere. Maybe under the bench or behind one of the flowerpots?

He sighed. He couldn’t avoid this forever. The only way to do that would be to shift and fly away, but he wasn’t leaving Samuel behind.

He turned around and watched Jarvis walk toward him. He hoped that whatever the man had to say, it would be brief. It wasn’t like Winter had anywhere to be or anything to do, but he could think of a few things as uncomfortable as being scolded by Jarvis.

“I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while,” Jarvis said when he reached Winter. “I’m glad I caught you, even though you were running away.”

Winter crossed his arms over his chest. “I wasn’t running away.”

Jarvis arched a brow. “Really? You could have fooled me. I mean, you weren’t running very fast, but I thought you were just being slow.”

“What do you want?” Winter asked, suddenly exhausted.

Jarvis sat on the closest bench and gestured for Winter to do the same. Winter sat as far away from him as possible, on the edge of the bench, so he’d be able to leave as soon as possible. It made him look like he was ready to bolt, but then he was, so he didn’t care.

Jarvis stared at him for a moment.

Winter wanted to ask what he was looking for, but he didn’t dare. He just waited for Jarvis to come out with it.

“I’ve noticed how tense things are between you and Keylon,” Jarvis eventually said. “I think everyone has.”

“I can’t help it,” Winter snapped, already defensive. “Everyone expects me and Keylon to get back together or whatever, but I’m not Alvin.”

Jarvis raised his hands. “I know, and I’m not telling you that you have to be with Keylon. I’ve gone through this, so I understand how things are. I understand how different you are from Alvin.”

Jarvis had gone through the same thing. He’d found his dragon, and just like Winter, Marlow had lost his memories. He wasn’t the man he’d been before, yet he and Jarvis were together. They even had a kid, although Winter had been told the boy was Marlow’s son.

Jarvis sighed. “I was hoping I’d never have to have this conversation, but I’m not surprised it happened. Look, Winter. I don’t know you. I knew Alvin, but you’re a mystery, and that’s okay. We all knew you wouldn’t be Alvin, and none of us expected you to fall back into Alvin’s life. I have to be honest with you, though. Keylon needs a shield. He needs someone to protect him, and for now, that someone is you. There’s nothing you can do to avoid that. The bond between you and Keylon exists, and while it doesn’t have to be permanent, right now, it’s what might keep Keylon alive if Carlyle attacks.”

“But I don’t want to be his shield,” Winter argued. He sounded like a child, but Jarvis didn’t say anything about it.

“I understand that, and I’m sure Keylon does, too, no matter how much it breaks his heart. No one wants to force you into anything you don’t want, but for now, you’re all he has. If there’s an attack, you’re the person who’s supposed to protect him. That means you need to stop running. I won’t allow you or anyone else to put one of my brothers in danger just because you’re afraid or don’t want to deal with what’s going on.”

There was a harshness in Jarvis’s voice that told Winter how serious he was. Winter wasn’t surprised. He’d watched the mages together, so he knew they were more like brothers than friends. He supposed it made sense since they’d been living together and supporting each other for decades. They’d been together when they’d lost their dragons, had felt the same emotions, had looked for the dragons together. Their shared experiences had pulled them together.

Winter looked down at his hands. “I don’t want Keylon to get hurt. I just feel out of control of my life, and I hate it. This doesn’t feel right. I was happy with Samuel’s clan, and I didn’t want to leave. I should have known better, but he insisted that he wanted to find out who was trying to find me.” And they’d ended up on Jarvis’s doorstep.

A gigantic castle’s doorstep.

“Running away won’t help either of you,” Jarvis said gently. “Whatever you two decide for your future, you and Keylon have to talk about it.”

“I know.”

“I guess I just wanted to ask you to please keep Keylon safe if he needs it. I don’t want to lose anyone else.”

That was something Winter could do, so he nodded. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said he didn’t want Keylon to be hurt.

The problem was that he knew that by the end of this, Keylon would be.

Keylon had been hoping for a reunion with his dragon, and instead, he’d gotten Winter. It might not have been so bad if Winter had been willing to stick around and give Keylon a chance, but that wasn’t what Winter wanted. He had a life with Samuel and their clan, and he wanted to go back to that. He’d never remember his old life, but his new one hadn’t been bad, and he didn’t want to lose it.