26. Conner

26

Conner

A s I stand in Summer's kitchen, the DNA results in an envelope in my hand, she holds out a sheet of paper. "These are the results I received after Tyler was born."

I glance at the sheet and scan it. "How did you get Alec's DNA?"

"Hair follicles…" She looks away. "On the bed, and from my brush."

Fuck.

"You knew Tyler was his all along. You didn't question that he could be mine?"

"No, the dates. But I wanted this just for confirmation." She takes a sip of water. "You and I…we hadn't been hooking up much."

"Yeah, that's because you were hooking up with Alec," I blurt out much harsher than intended. Jesus, it's just a lot to wrap my brain around.

She pushes off the island and walks into the living room. "I'm sorry," she murmurs quietly as she takes a seat on her sofa.

I follow her in, my DNA results still in the envelope. I had the results sent to her place, not wanting them to go to mine and risking Dani asking questions. It's awful to keep this from her, it's giving me a damn ulcer, but I don't want to hurt her.

"I'm not looking for apologies," I tell her. "I'm looking for answers." I drop into her wingback chair, Tyler's playful sounds from his bedroom filling the apartment. It's easy to tell she loves her child, and he's well taken care of. Why she thought we'd try to take him away is beyond me. She must not think much of our family. Jesus, my parents would love to know Tyler. They'd be amazing grandparents, despite the circumstances. Having a piece of Alec would do wonders for them.

I peel open the envelope with shaky hands, even though I'm sure the results are going to be the same as Summer's. I open the paper and read it carefully, before I hand it over, and sink back into my chair. How the hell do I tell Dani? I honestly don't know if I can. If Tyler is going to be a part of our lives, and I definitely want that, she has to know something.

"What are you going to do?" Summer asks quietly.

"I want to know him. I want my parents to know him."

"And Dani, what will you tell her?"

"Jesus, Summer. This is so fucked up." I sink deeper into the and cover my face with my hands. My stomach is so tight, I'm sure I'm going to vomit.

"If you told her he was yours…"

I drop my arm and sit up. "I can't let her think Tyler is mine."

"If you're going to be a big part of his life, like you say, what does it matter?"

"It matters." Jesus, there have been enough lies to last a lifetime.

She grips the hem of her shirt and twists it in her fingers. "If you tell her it's Alec's, it's going to be bad, Conner. She's going to hate you for keeping Alec's secret all these years, and she's naturally going to hate me."

Fuck, she's right. She's definitely going to hate me, and what we have will be gone in a heartbeat. "Fuck me." An almost hysterical laugh bubbles out of my throat. This is it. Right here, this is it. The third ball dropping. I thought that had already happened when I found out what my brother had done to Dani and me, but nope. That's nothing compared to what's going to happen when she realizes I've been holding my brother's dark secrets.

I push to my feet. "I need to go."

"Where are you going?" She stands and Tyler comes running into the room.

"I don't know. I need to go figure things out. Figure out how I'm going to handle all this." I sink to my knees in front of Tyler and put my hands on his shoulders. I take in his big blue, vulnerable eyes, and nearly fucking sob. Alec has a son. I have a nephew. This is wonderful news, and so very hurtful to so very many at the same time.

"Tyler, I'm your Uncle Conner." Tyler just stares at me. "I'm going to come back and see you." I realize he can't understand what I'm saying. Heck, he's only fifteen months. "I'm going to take you to see your grandmother and grandfather soon too." I look over at Summer and she nods.

"Do you want me to be with you when you tell them?" she asks quietly.

"I appreciate the offer, Summer. I think it's something I have to do on my own. Let them get used to the idea."

She starts crying and puts her hands over her eyes and Tyler runs to her and wraps his arms around her legs. "They're going to hate me. I was just so scared, Conner." She drops to her knees and hugs her son. "I love him so much. I don't have a lot of support and I would die if he was taken away from me."

I drop in front of them and take them both into my arms, the fight draining out of me. "You're never going to lose him, and think of it this way, your small family will be expanding and you're going to have all the support you'd ever need."

She sniffs. "Dani…she's going to hate me and I don't blame her." She drops her hands and blinks at me. "I'm not that same person, Conner. I was young, and foolish, and you always seemed distracted around me, and whenever I saw you around Dani, it was so obvious that you were in love with her and not me. I was jealous and foolish and wanted to get back at you both. Having a child changed who I was. I've grown up. I'm a different person now. I'm a good person."

"I know."

"I don't want to hurt any more people."

I stand and pull her up with me as she holds Tyler on her hip. "Come on. I think you both could use some ice cream and I need to figure out what I'm going to tell Dani." She sets Tyler down, and we head down the hall to take the elevator to the main floor. When we reach it, I push open the door, and as Summer continues to quietly cry, I put my arm around her and take Tyler's hand in mine, not wanting him to dart onto the street. I don't know him well enough to know if he'd do that, but from the stories Mom told me, boys can be handfuls.

As the sun shines down on us, a car starts from across the street and my gaze goes to the noise. My heart stalls in my chest when my gaze lands on Dani's, who's watching us from her driver's seat. "What the hell?" How did she know where I was? But that's not the question I should be asking right now. Not when she's driving off after seeing me with my arm around Summer and Tyler's hand in mine.

Oh, Jesus no.

I take a step forward. "Dani, wait."

She doesn't wait. Instead, she pulls onto the road and steps on the gas, zinging past us and barely stopping at the stop sign on the corner.

"Oh no," Summer whimpers, as she scoops Tyler up. "She's going to think…"

Panicked, I take the stairs to the walkway two at a time. "I know what she's going to think." For a brief second, I consider letting her think that. At least that way she'd never have to know the depths of Alec's betrayal—my betrayal. Hell, not only have I kept his secrets, the man is dead because of me.

"You better go find her."

I turn back to Tyler. "We'll get ice cream another day, okay?"

He just stares at me with those big, sweet eyes, and smiles, his big cheeks puffing out. "See you, kiddo." I ruffle his hair and take in Summer's worried eyes. "It's going to be okay," I tell her even though I'm not so sure of that myself. "We'll work this out, and no one is going to hate you." They might not hate her, but Dani and maybe even my parents will hate me when they find out what I'd done.

I hurry across the street to my car and jump in. The first place I go to is my house, only to find the driveway empty. I drive to her place, and see the bus, but not her car. I tug my phone from my pocket and call her. It goes straight to voicemail. "Fuck." I shoot off a text, telling her we need to talk. Maybe I should have told her what was going on long before this. I just didn't want to hurt her.

I wait for her to text back. "Come on, Dani." I run my hands through my hair and sit a bit longer. I give up and decide she must have gone to the Airbnb. Seeing the dogs always puts her in a good mood. I back out of her driveway and head across town. I pull into the Airbnb parking lot, and even though her vehicle is nowhere to be found, I hurry from my car and run inside. I find Marley at the receptionist counter talking with Tanya, and they both lift their heads when they see me storming inside.

"Hey," Marley says, and comes around the counter. "Are you okay?"

Breathless, with my throat so dry it's hard to talk, I begin. "Is Dani here?"

"No, she took the day off," Marley explains, her eyes narrowed in concern. "She was spending it with her sister and the kids." I nod. "Is everything okay?"

"No." She opens her mouth, but I cut her off. "If you see her, can you tell her I'm looking for her."

She nods, and I glance at Tanya who's reaching for her phone, no doubt about to call Dani to see what's going on. I meet her gaze. "Please ask her to meet me at home."

She gives a small, tight nod, and I turn and head back out the door. I consider texting Brighton, or Gina or one of the girls. Although, I'm not sure she'd run to any of them. How could she possibly tell anyone that I had a family behind her back, when we were trying to make a baby together? Yeah, she's not going to open up to anyone other than family about that. Family. Shit. She must be at Rylee's.

I get back in my car and check my phone one more time before I start back across town to her sister's house. I try not to drive fast or erratic, but it's damn hard. Relief washes over me when I see Dani's car, and I park quickly and run to the front door. I try the knob but it's locked. I knock, and when it goes unanswered, I circle the house to see if they're out back, only to find it empty.

Back at the front door, I knock again. "Dani, come to the door." I pound harder, and note the neighbors glancing my way. "Dani, please." The door creeps open and I come face to face with Jared. "Where is she?" I try to see past his shoulders but he's tall like me.

"She's upstairs with Rylee. She doesn't want to see you."

"Come on, Jared. Ask her to come down."

He folds his arms, and squares off against me. "Not going to do it, man."

"Fuck, Jared, can you please tell her it's not what she thinks."

"No, what is it then? What should she think?" he asks, his eyes hard as he protects his sister-in-law, and I respect him for that. It's good Dani has people like him in her life. I don't readily answer and he presses, "What is it, Conner?"

Christ, if I admit that Alec was having an affair, and had a child after Dani lost hers, and is having trouble conceiving, it will absolutely destroy her. I can't do that. I won't.

He lifts himself up a little taller. "Well…"

"I…can't."

"You better figure your shit out, Conner." He slams the door so hard, it nearly hits me in the face. I back up and lift my head to see the upstairs window. A shadow moves past, and I'm about to shout. But what the hell am I going to say to her? I don't know, but I do know there are two people I also need to talk to. Maybe they can help me make sense of this and figure out my next move. I just pray that what I'm about to tell them, doesn't destroy them…or us.

It's dinner time by the time I reach Mom and Dad's place and I pull in behind Dad's car. Since their life is very routine, I know I'll be catching them eating, but if I wait, I fear I won't have the courage to do what needs to be done, what should probably have been done a long time ago.

I knock instead of entering, just to give myself a second to pull it together. Mom opens the door and her smile dissolves when she sets eyes on me.

"Conner, what is it?" At the sound of my name, Dad comes to the door and stands behind Mom.

"We need to talk."

They both go pale, no doubt because I'm not only struggling to stand, I'm struggling to speak. "Come sit, Conner," Mom says and guides me into the living room. I drop into a chair and Mom and Dad take the sofa across from me. I lean forward, brace my elbows on my knees as their warmth and comfort curls around me.

"What is it, son?" Dad asks.

I swallow, and pinch my eyes shut. When I open them again, I blurt out. "Alec had an affair a couple of years ago. I knew about it and said nothing. I just found out he has a son, and I'm the reason he died the day Dani lost her baby."