18. Conner

18

Conner

" H ow do I look?"

I close the fridge as Dani comes into the kitchen, smoothing her hand over her pretty yellow sundress, her lashes blinking rapidly. It's easy to tell she's nervous. "Beautiful as always, and it's a backyard barbecue, not a dinner at the White House. We've done it a million of times so you don't have to be nervous."

She laughs. "I know, but we have never told my parents we were dating before." She's right. But she did once tell them she was dating my brother. I wasn't there to see their reaction, of course. I can only imagine they were elated, though. She landed the Birch brother with brains and a college career ahead of him. "It's not like I can tell them we're sleeping together because I asked you to be my baby daddy." Beneath the worry I catch the hint of sadness. Stepping up to her, I pull her in for a hug.

"It will happen, Dani. It's hasn't been that long, and hey we get to have more sex and I believe you said something about me being amazeballs."

She miles up at me, and I kiss the tip of her nose. "I almost feel relieved to be honest. I think we need to let our parents get used to the idea of us being together before we spring a baby on them."

"I agree, and what about the more sex part? Does that make you happy?" What am I doing? Fishing for compliments? Trying to figure out if she might want to keep this relationship going after she's pregnant. I mentally scold myself. Jesus, she wants my DNA because she's still in love with her late husband. I inch back, and before she can answer, I hold my arms out. "How do I look?"

She lets her gaze rake down the length of me. "Nice polo and khakis. Perfect for a backyard barbecue. It's almost like you didn't shower and tug on the first thing you found in your closet."

I feign offense. "I'll have you know, I agonized over the look."

She rolls her eyes at me and walks around me to get to the fridge. "I think Rylee is going to lose her mind when we tell her."

"Why's that?"

"She's been trying to get us together forever."

"No way."

She places the salad on the counter, and grabs two water bottles. "I'm not sure she ever really understood Alec and me."

"Really? I didn't know that."

To be honest, I never really understood it either. His interest in her seemed to come out of nowhere, and if they weren't having sex, what were they doing? I realize relationships aren't built on sex. Hell, Dani and I have our friendship, and it's real, truthful and deep. Although I am hiding a secret, but it's for her own good.

"I think this is going to make her happy," she says, her smile dissolving. "I just don't look forward to telling them the truth. At least they'll think the baby was created out of love, and that in the end we weren't compatible. I think that's the best way to handle it."

I nod, my stomach tight. "I'll do whatever you want, Dani."

She turns from me, and picks up the salad. "Let's go get this over with."

We walk outside into the bright sunshine, and I hit the fob on my car. She puts the salad in the back and slides into the passenger seat. Her eyes are on me as I cross the front of the car and get into the driver's seat. I back out of my driveway and turn to her.

"I was thinking about the cup party," she says.

"You want to have one?"

She gives a small shake of her head. "I think you should celebrate. I'd love to plan it, Conner."

"You're busy enough as it is, and if you get pregnant I don't want you on your feet and stressing."

She rolls her eyes at me. "I'm fine."

"Dani, last time…" I remind her gently.

Her hand reaches out to take mine. "It wasn't meant to be. I've learned that over the years. That doesn't mean it's going to happen again, but believe me, if and when I get pregnant, I'm going to be very, very careful. I really want this."

"I know you do." Heck, I want it too. I never even knew how much I wanted it until I warmed to the idea and if our child does have a learning disorder, we'll figure it out right away so he or she doesn't have a hard time in school. My heart beats a little faster, and as I look at her, I almost blurt out that I love her. "We'll get there, Dani," I tell her quietly and as her small smile wraps around my heart, love and guilt and every other emotion I've tried to keep in check for years, presses against the back of my eyes and I nearly fucking sob. I turn from her and concentrate on the road as I work to pull myself together.

"Anyway, I'd like to have a party. I'd love to get Ash and Gina in the same room again."

I shake my head no. "We are not playing matchmaker." What the women fail to realize is Ash isn't who he used to be. He's not quite the player off the ice anymore. Not since the incident. But it's not my place to talk about it, or what management is requiring of him.

Ignoring that, she hurries out with, "Oh, I forgot to tell you. Lucy passed her training. She's now a certified therapy dog. I'm so excited for her. I can now take her into the nursing homes. It's fun for the residents to see different breeds." I arch a brow and she reads the question in my eyes. "Dachshund."

I laugh. "Those are the wiener dogs, with the tiny legs."

"Yes. I'll have to lift her for the residents to see her, but she's only tiny. I was thinking about going in next week. Want to come?"

"I'd love to. What day are you thinking? I have kids hockey camp Tuesday and Thursday."

"Does Wednesday work?

"Yup." I take in her big smile. She really is so lucky to love what she does and I really hope she can get a dog of her own one of these days. It's odd that Alec didn't want a dog. Growing up, he loved our lab, Jersey. Unfortunately, Dani never got to meet her. We were all gutted when we lost her during our elementary school years. Maybe he didn't want to face that pain again.

Twenty minutes later, I pull up to the bungalow where Dani grew up, just down the street from where I grew up and my parents still live.

Dani exhales loudly and turns toward me as I kill the ignition. "Here goes nothing."

I give her a confident smile, although it defies what's going on inside my gut. This whole situation is messed up and I hope what we have to say doesn't cause any trouble. But we're all adults who are simply adulting, and I do know her parents have always supported her decisions, and they were by her side for months after Alec, especially when I was away playing and couldn't be there for her.

"Do you think they'll like me?" I tease.

She laughs. "You know they love you."

Their faces always lit up when I came over to hang with Dani back in high school, before Alec started dating her. That gives me pause. "Did they love Alec?"

Her hand stalls as she reaches for the door. "I…I assume they did." She looks off into the distance, like she's trying to drag memories from the back of her mind.

When she remains quiet, I open my door. "Okay, let's go get this over with."

We step from the car and she grabs the salad. The front door opens as we head up the walkway. "You didn't have to bring anything," her mom Beverly scolds, with a big smile on her face.

"It's Dad's favorite, so I think he might have something different to say." Dani leans in and gives her mom a hug.

"Conner, it's so good to see you." Beverly throws her arms around me. "How's your mom and dad? It's been so long since we all had a family gathering. Maybe we can do something for the upcoming long weekend?"

Mom and Dad go to my games, but they don't go out or socialize like they used to. The loss of a son will do that to you and that thought brings another pang of guilt. Alec is gone because of me.

"I'm sure they'd love that," I agree around the lump in my throat.

"I saw Darcy at the grocery store last week." She gives me a warm, motherly smile that holds so much sympathy and compassion. "She looks well."

"I'll talk to them about the long weekend."

We follow her down the hall and into the kitchen, and outside I hear laughter. Rylee and Jared and the kids are obviously all here. For a brief moment, I consider what it will be like when Dani and I add a child to the mix. The house will be filled with so much love and happiness. I want that. Honestly, I'm sure a child would help fill my parents' house with life and laughter, and they sure as hell could use that.

"You two head out. I'll get us wine," she says to Dani.

Out on the back deck, we're greeted with smiles. "Hey, Conner," Jared greets me.

"Let me get you a beer, son," her dad Calvin says. He disappears into the house, just as Beverly comes out with two glasses of wine. She slides one to Dani and drops down into the chair.

Ava comes running up to Dani. "Aunt Dani, push me on the swing."

"She will in a minute," Rylee tells her. "Let her sit for a moment, she just got here." Rylee pushes a chair out for Dani. "Sit, drink wine, and get me caught up on all the gossip." She sighs and glances at her children, everything about her alluding to the fact that she doesn't get out much anymore. "I miss gossip…" She stares at the wine as Dani takes a sip. "I miss wine."

"What you have is better than gossip and wine," Dani murmurs, a deep longing in her voice.

Rylee's eyes go wide when she realizes what she said. "I'm sorry, Dani."

"No, it's okay. I'm not…anyway." Dani waves her hand. "Let me figure out what gossip you missed." She glances at me, and takes her bottom lip between her teeth.

Ava grumbles and blinks at me. I laugh at her antics. "How about I push you in a minute?"

"Fine." She takes off down the stairs and joins her brother on the swing set.

"Any gossip you can think of, Conner?"

I wait a second, wanting her father here so we only have to announce it once. He comes out with a cold beer for me and hands it over. I take a much-needed drink of the cold liquid, and as I think about what to say, or how to say it, I realize action is better than words.

"Well…" I begin, and lean down and kiss Dani on the lips. Gasps sound around us and when I inch back and give Dani a small smile, she looks both horrified and amused. "How's that for gossip?"

Rylee jumps from her seat. "Are you kidding me?" she starts clapping and jumping up and down. "I knew it. I knew it. And it's about freaking time." I note the way Beverly and Calvin are staring at their daughter carefully. "Wait." Rylee stops clapping. "Is that gossip, or is that real?"

"We're dating," I tell them all. Silence ensues for a second which feels like an eternity, and I can only imagine—other than Rylee—they're all trying to grasp the reality of this. I take another sip of beer as my throat dries.

"Mom," Dani says. "Dad." She toys with the stem of her wine glass. "Conner and I are dating. I know this is confusing, and maybe?—"

"It's wonderful," Beverly gushes, a wide smile splitting her lips as she pulls her daughter in for a hug, tears filling her eyes.

"You're okay with this?"

"More than okay with this," Calvin answers, as he too leans in to hug her. My gaze slides to Jared, and he lifts his beer bottle in salute.

He grins as he tips it toward me. "About time, dude."

I take in Dani's family, who've always been like family to me too. I'd hoped they'd be okay with us dating, but I hadn't expected them all to be looking at us like they know something we don't. Wait, do they?