Chapter 10

CHAPTER

TEN

Merrick

I'm reeling. How has this beautiful creature been overlooked by the men in this town? I know Willow River is small, but Courtney is... not easily missed. There's a fire burning inside me at her confession. It could also be that she's lying next to me in nothing but panties and my T-shirt. I want to give her everything she's missed. I want to be the one who experiences all of her firsts with her. I want to be there for all of it.

I don't understand the feeling, but I'm not running away from it either. We have a connection, and even though we're pretending, it's easy because, well, I don't have to pretend when I'm with Courtney.

"Let me show you." Fuck me, my voice is so thick with desire, even I can hear it. She doesn't reply, but in the stillness of the room, I can hear her breathing pick up. She's processing, and I can give her time to do that.

"Okay."

Okay?

Holy fuck, she said okay.

My heart hammers in my chest. The pressure is on not to fuck this up for her. This is her first time sleeping next to a man. Swallowing hard, I reach for her. "Come closer," I tell her. She does as I ask and helps me haul her into my body.

My hand settles on her hip as I think about how I want this to go. I know what I want. I want to strip her bare and slide inside her. I want to hear her moan for me, and then hold her all night long, but that's not what this is about. This is about her and giving her something she's never experienced.

Maybe with time, the other ideas bouncing around in my head will come to fruition.

"Hey," I whisper as I move my hand to trace her spine. I feel her shiver against me.

"Hey."

"Thank you," I say softly.

"For what?"

"Letting me hold you." I know her confidence is low, and I need her to understand that this is a privilege for me. I don't take the trust she's put in me lightly.

She chuckles. "I should be thanking you."

"Nothing I'd rather do," I admit. "Well, maybe one thing."

"What's that?"

"I want to kiss you." Cautiously, so as not to come on too strong, I slide my hand behind her neck. She can tell me no, but damn, I hope she doesn't.

"You want to kiss me?" I can hear the disbelief in her tone.

"More than anything."

"Okay."

I smile. "You're very agreeable tonight."

"Someone recently told me I need to stand up for myself, and that I need to fight for what I want." There's a quiver in her voice.

"And you want me to kiss you?"

"Yes."

With my hand behind her neck, I pull her closer. My lips are now a breath from hers. "You're a gift," I mumble just before my lips press to hers. It's just a soft press, but it's not enough. One taste isn't enough. I decide to push her just a little. I lick at her lips, and she opens for me.

I take the opportunity to slide my tongue against hers. She gasps at the intrusion but doesn't hesitate to take what I'm offering and kiss me back. Her hands find their way to my hair, and she tugs gently as the heat of our kiss intensifies.

I need her closer.

Moving my hand from her neck, I make a slow trek down her body until I reach her thigh. I lift her leg over mine and she moans when she feels how hard I am for her. I'm very aware of the fact that we're crossing lines. Lines that are meant to be drawn with a chisel tip Sharpie.

My cock is screaming to be set free, to be inside her, but I ignore the throbbing and continue to kiss her. I slow my strokes, savoring her. This isn't about me. This is about her. This is about giving this gorgeous woman a new experience. One she was brave enough to reach out and take, and she needs to be rewarded for that. That means my cock needs to be ignored as I take my time exploring her mouth while allowing my hands to roam over every inch of her that I can reach.

"Merrick—" she pleads. Her hand slinks between us as she reaches for the waistline of my shorts.

I have to stop this.

Pulling out of the kiss, I place my hand over hers, stopping her. "Not tonight."

"Oh." She tries to slip away, and I know she's feeling rejected.

I take her hand in mine and place it over my hard cock. "I want you, Courtney. Get out of that beautiful head of yours. I'm not rejecting you. I'm just saying not tonight."

"Why?" she asks, her voice small.

"Because tonight I'm giving you a new experience. My cock was not a part of that." I kiss her again, just a quick peck against her lips. I can't allow myself more. I have to stop this before I can't.

"Roll over, baby." She does as I ask and rolls over, placing her back to my chest. Sliding one arm under her head, I wrap the other around her, and bury my face in her neck, kissing lightly. "Goodnight, gorgeous."

"Are you comfortable like this?" she asks.

"Very. Are you?"

"It's—yeah, I'm warm, and I feel... safe. Like I'm wrapped up in a Merrick cocoon."

"Good." I kiss her again, just below her ear.

"Goodnight."

Another kiss because I can't seem to stop myself before I close my eyes and will myself to fall asleep with this beautiful, uncertain woman in my arms. I can't help but wonder what other experiences I can give her. That's my last thought as I finally drift off to sleep.

My eyes pop open when I feel Courtney trying to move out of my arms. "No," I grumble, and she giggles. Fuck me, I could get used to hearing that sound first thing in the morning.

"I have to pee," she whines.

"Are you coming back to bed?"

She hesitates. "I'll come back to bed."

"Fine." I kiss her bare shoulder where my T-shirt has slid off during the night. She tosses off the covers and scurries off to the bathroom. I do the same, needing to take care of business. I stand just outside the bathroom door to wait for her. When the door opens, she gasps.

"Did you find the extra toothbrushes?" I ask, knowing she did from the sounds coming from the bathroom.

"I did."

"Good." I lean in and press my lips to her temple. "Get back in bed." I walk into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. I quickly handle my business, wash my hands, and brush my teeth.

I find Courtney in bed with the covers pulled up to her chin. "You cold?" I ask her, slipping back into bed beside her. I don't stop until I have her back in my arms.

"Not anymore," she says with a small laugh.

"How are you feeling?"

"Rested."

"And last night?"

Her back is to my front, and she pulls the covers up to cover her face. "Embarrassed."

"Embarrassed?" I ask, surprised, although I shouldn't be. "Don't hide from me," I tease as I tickle her side. She giggles and squirms, trying to get away from me. "Court."

She keeps her face hidden.

Climbing over her, I tug on the blanket and offer her a cheeky smile when our eyes meet. "Last night was hot as fuck. You have nothing to be embarrassed about."

"I groped you."

"Hot. As. Fuck." I lean in and kiss the corner of her mouth. I make myself pull back before I take this too far.

"Really?"

"I'll never lie to you, Court. Not ever, and yes, really. I had a beautiful woman in my bed, with my cock in her hand, and my tongue down her throat. That's a good night."

"You're... ridiculous," she says, but she's smiling.

"Well, this ridiculous man is going to take the beautiful woman in his bed to breakfast."

"I need clothes and a shower." She wrinkles her nose adorably.

"I'll shower fast, and then we can stop by your place."

"Are you sure?"

I move in, my lips hovering over hers. "Absolutely." This time, when I kiss her, I allow myself to take it further. My tongue battles with hers as she meets me stroke for stroke. My cock is painfully hard. I pull away and kiss her nose. "I'll be quick. Help yourself to whatever." I move off the bed and head to the bathroom. I step under the spray before the water is warm, trying to cool down my desire for her. Not that it helps. I have a feeling the only thing that will do that is me inside her.

That's taking this beyond pretending to be hers for a few months and a date to her sister's wedding.

After breakfast, I dropped Courtney off at her place. Maverick called while we were out and asked if I could help him with the kids this afternoon. Stella has a hair appointment, and this is the first time Maverick has been alone with all three littles. He's stressing even though he shouldn't be. He's got this—he's Superdad—but I'm going to be there regardless. Especially since the twins are just under three months old. What if they both have a diaper blowout at the same time? That's a definite need for more hands.

We didn't make plans for when Courtney and I would see each other next, but we've been texting off and on all afternoon about everything and nothing at all. Case in point, I just texted her my bed, the one we slept in last night covered in all the laundry I've washed since dropping her off.

Me: Folding laundry is the bane of my existence.

Courtney: It's a necessary evil. I mean, you could just leave it in baskets and wear them wrinkled. That sounds like a very single-guy thing to do.

Me: Not a single guy, remember? I don't shy away from the hard stuff.

My reply has a double meaning, one I'm sure she's going to pick up on. Courtney is smart as hell.

Courtney: I'm starting to learn that about you.

Me: As soon as I get this folded, I'm headed to Maverick's. You want to come with me?

Courtney: I'll let you have your manly bonding time.

Me: Ada and Lacey take offense to that.

She sends back a string of laughing emoji.

Courtney: Next time. I have my own mound of laundry.

She sends me a similar picture, but hers seems way more organized than mine.

Me: I will call you when I get home.

Courtney: Talk soon.

I toss my phone on the bed, knowing damn well I won't be able to wait until I'm home to talk to her. She'll get more messages, because this is who we've become with one another, and I can admit it's been nice, having her in my life. I never could have guessed that in such a short amount of time, I'd be this... attached to her, but here we are.

"Ada bug!" I call out as I walk into the living room. My niece lifts her head and climbs to her feet, abandoning the doll she was playing with on the floor. I crouch down and open my arms wide for her. When she's in my arms, I rain kisses down all over her cheeks, making her laugh.

"You ready to hang out with your favorite uncle?" I ask her.

"Pway dowwies."

"You got it, toots." I place her on my hip and walk over to the couch where Maverick is holding a twin in each arm. "How's it going?"

"Good, so far. I'm glad you're here." He huffs out a breath of laughter. "This is the first time I've been with all three of them on my own. I don't know if I'll need you, but I thought it better safe than sorry."

"Uncle Merrick to the rescue."

Ada wiggles to get out of my arms, and I place her on her feet. She rushes back to her dolls, plopping down to continue playing.

"Give me a baby," I tell my brother. I don't give him time to decide. Instead, choosing to scoop Lacey from his arms to mine. She's the closest. "Hey, sweet girl," I coo. She's awake and watching me intently. "How are they sleeping?"

"Better. Only waking up once a night, and usually at the same time, so we can tag team it and get back to bed."

"Like a rock star, huh, Lace?" I ask my niece, who just watches me like I'm the most interesting thing in her world, and right now, I probably am.

"How was breakfast?"

"Good. I dropped Court off at her place after and did laundry. It was an exhilarating experience," I say, deadpan.

"I heard there was a strange car in your driveway this morning."

I glance over to see him grinning. "She stayed over."

He nods. "So no more faking?"

"No. I mean, yes, we're still faking it."

"But she stayed the night?"

I lift Lacey to my lips and kiss her forehead, buying myself some time. "She made me dinner. When I got home last night, she was there. She said I've been working so many hours, that she wanted me to have something better than takeout for dinner. We had dinner and watched a movie. She fell asleep, so she stayed. It was late, and I didn't want to worry about her driving home in the middle of the night." That's me being a good friend. Not the man who relished the feel of her in his arms as he carried her to his bed.

"You don't have a guest room. Not a furnished one."

"Nope."

"You don't look like a man who spent the night scrunched up on his couch."

"Because I'm not." I turn to face him, and he's my twin. He knows, but he's going to ask me anyway because he wants me to admit it out loud.

"I know you didn't make her sleep on the couch. That's not who we are."

"Nope."

"So she slept in your bed with you?"

"She did." There's no point in denying it. Maverick would be able to see right through my bullshit.

He grins. "How was that?"

"It was... not what I expected," I confess as images of kissing her last night and holding her in my arms flash through my mind.

"You're into her."

"She's gorgeous. Who wouldn't be?" I'm deflecting. We both know it, but thankfully, Ada insists I read her a story. She climbs up beside me on the couch, handing me the book. With Lacey in one arm, the book in the other, and with Ada tucked into my side, I read my niece her story. By the time I'm done, she's fast asleep, as is her baby sister, her baby brother, and my brother. Everyone is sleeping peacefully. I manage to slip out from under Ada without waking her and place Lacey in the Pack 'N Play, before carrying Ada to her room. Next, I take Ryan from Maverick. He wakes with a jolt.

"Go to bed. I've got this." He nods, sleepily rises from the couch, and heads to his room. I lay Ryan next to Lacey and pull out my phone, snapping a few pictures. Before I can stop myself, I send a few to Courtney.

Me: Everyone is sleeping but me.

Courtney: You have that effect.

I grin down at my phone. I know she's thinking about last night.

Me: What can I say? I've got skills.

Courtney: So he says.

Her message is followed by a winking emoji.

Me: I can prove it.

Courtney: This got way off track fast.

Me: Are you mad?

Courtney: No.

Me: Do you want me to show you?

I hit Send before I can think better of it. It's similar to what I asked her last night, but we were in the moment, in my bed, huddled under the covers in the dark of night. It was easier for her to give me her "okay" than it will be now.

Courtney: Okay.

My heart stalls in my chest. I was wrong. Maybe hiding behind the screen of her phone makes it just as easy as the darkness of my bedroom.

Me: Name it, Court. Anything.

I mean that. Quickly, Courtney has become someone I would do anything for. I'm not diving into why that is. I don't want to overcomplicate this. I'm going with the flow. Following her lead. It doesn't feel much like we're faking this anymore. It's been a few weeks since this started, and already it's more.

Just more.

She replies with a face emoji with hands covering her eyes. I leave it at that until I get home tonight and call her. I won't let her hide from what she wants. If what she wants is me, even better. Only a fool would pass up a chance to give that woman experiences she's been too shy to take for herself until now.

My momma didn't raise no fool.

I'll give her whatever she needs.

Fake relationship or not, that's real. It's as real as it gets and if my words aren't enough to prove that, just listen to the rapid beat of my heart when I think about or talk about her, and my cock, well, I've been hard since last night, hell, for weeks, and I don't see that changing anytime soon.