Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

Eddie

"FUCK!" I yell. Just great, Callie still isn't answering my calls. I need to explain what happened. I need to find her before it's too late.

16 Hours Earlier

"How ya feelin', bro?" Mickki says, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me into his side as we hear the crowd chanting his name.

"Like shit," I reply. There's no point lying to him.

"Are the meds not working?"

"Yeah, they're fine—I just feel off. Fuck, I miss her yelling at me, and I miss annoying her just enough that she smiles at me. I honestly don't care about the drugs, women, or booze anymore."

"I'm proud of you. Maybe after this it's time to go get the girl."

"If only it were that easy. Callie isn't just any girl."

"Let's do this. If you're serious, and this is your last, let's make it one hell of a show," he says, before walking out onto the stage, and the crowd goes nuts.

"How's everyone tonight?" Mickki says, greeting the fans. "You all know my knucklehead brother, Eddie, right?"

The crowd goes crazy, and that's my cue. I run out onto the stage, taking off my shirt and throwing it to some diehard Black Diamond fan. Taking my spot, I give them a little solo. As each of us is introduced and we do our thing, I scan the crowd, looking for that smile, but she isn't here.

Alex was told to send a plane ticket for her and her son, along with some backstage passes. My heart sinks a little—I thought maybe she'd come to watch my last show. I can play this set in my sleep, but my heart isn't in it and my mind is elsewhere. I don't know what I'm feeling—possibly a combination of hurt and disappointment. They're two emotions I'm used to, but why does it feel different this time?

I bet I scared her off. What was I thinking? She wanted me to do this for myself, so of course she didn't come, but a few days doesn't change anything. I won't give up on us.

Fuckin' hell, Eddie, when the hell did you become an "us" man?

As the end of the set approaches, I scan the audience once again, and still nothing. Though plenty of women with sex in their eyes stare me down. I know I have a reputation and so many women are ready to throw themselves at me, but tonight I don't notice any of them. The only thing I notice is the one person who's missing from the sea of faces staring back at me.

For the first time in my whole life, I want to go home. After two bloody encores, we finish for the night. Mickki has a group of girls ready for the after-party, but I tell him I have to go back to the hotel first and make a few calls. He smiles at me and ushers the girls into his limo, while Damien and a few other security guys get me into my SUV. Damien hands me my phone, and I immediately check to see if I have any missed calls or messages. There's a handful of missed calls, but not one from her. After scrolling through double the number of messages—most are from women I don't remember giving my number to—and not seeing her name, I shove the phone in my pocket.

It's been years since I sat down to actually watch TV, and now I remember why. There's absolutely nothing interesting to watch. Eyeing the fridge, which I know is stocked with alcohol, I think one won't hurt.

One will hurt, Eddie. Think about Callie and her smile. You want her to smile for you.

Fuck, I'm pussy-whipped and I don't even have the pussy. Just thinking about her makes me hard; maybe a cold shower will shock me back to feeling more like myself. I check my phone and there's still nothing. I want to call her, but will she think I'm being pushy?

Get a grip, Eddie, you sound like a whiny little bitch.

The cold shower works a treat—my dick and balls almost retract inside my body as soon as the water hits my skin. My boner now gone, I switch the cold shower to a nice hot one. Leaning back, I let the water fall over my head. Closing my eyes, I can instantly see her in my mind, naked on her knees in front of me, and I look down into those big blue eyes as she licks her lips before she takes me into her mouth.

My dick perks up again, and I can't help stroking myself as I imagine her lips wrapped around me.

"Well, it looks like I'm interrupting something."

My grip loosens and my eyes open to see Alex standing there in nothing more than a tiny piece of fabric covering her crotch. I knew she'd come for some of the monster, they all do. People may think I'm full of myself, but it's true they come to me, they beg for it.

She takes my lack of reaction as an invitation to get in the shower. With a snap, the fabric drops to the wet tiles. As I run my hand over her lean, shapeless body, my mind wanders to a woman with curves. She drops to her knees and licks her lips as the water falls on her face.

"Aren't you glad she didn't come tonight?" she says, taking my length down her throat.

"Hmmm," slips from my lips as she pulls away.

"Lucky her tickets never made it," she purrs, trying to sound seductive.

"What?" I yell as I push her away.

She falls on her arse in the shower, naked, and looking up at me as if I've lost my mind.

"Did you honestly think I'd be happy about that and I would want you over her?" I step from the shower and wrap a towel around my body.

"You wanted me," she screeches, throwing the container of shampoo my way.

"I never said I wanted you, love. I said I could fuck you, and just because I can, doesn't mean I will," I snap as Damien comes running into the bathroom. He takes one look at Alex naked in the shower, before shaking his head and walking out.

"I think you should leave. I'll have Damien escort you out. Never pull a stunt like this again or your arse will be fired. Callie is, and will always be, the woman every other woman has to live up to. And she's pretty damn special, so I don't think anyone could." I don't wait for a reply—I walk out, leaving her sitting in the shower.

"Yo, Damien, get your buff arse in here!"

He casually comes into the room. "What's up, bossman?"

"Make sure she leaves and isn't seen. If she is, pay the slimy fuckers whatever they want for the shots. If Callie gets wind of this, I won't have a chance with her."

"No worries. Don't go anywhere until I get back. Marcus will hand me my arse if you do."

"Marcus? Never, he's a pussycat." I laugh.

"You can tell him that," he says back.

"I'll pass. I'm sure I can entertain myself for a few minutes." I drop my towel.

"Put some clothes on. The last thing we need is some naked dick pics spread over the bloody internet by morning. Those paps are like chameleons and blend into the walls."

"I do all my best thinking naked," I throw back, picking out some clothes from the walk-in robe. I don't know why the staff even unpack our stuff—it seems pointless.

"Don't you mean you used to do all your best thinking naked? Eddie Diamond, rock star, wouldn't leave a hot naked woman in his shower unsatisfied."

"That was when I had nothing to lose," I say, walking out of the closet.

Alex is now standing wrapped in a towel next to Damien. He hands her a black trench coat she must have worn inside, and she even has the nerve to drop her towel and take it from him.

"When you've finished this little show, I'll take you to your room," Damien says.

Alex huffs and storms out, and he follows behind her.

I must give him a raise—I knew I liked him for a reason. Once I get dressed, I wait for Damien to come back. But honestly, I don't feel like going to the after-party. I need to play some music. I hear the door unlock and Damien comes back inside.

"Took you long enough," I say, jumping up from my seat.

"Sorry, that chick's crazy. Where we headed?" he asks.

"Somewhere where there's music," I say.

Damien makes a call and gets another few security guys to meet us downstairs—he's paranoid. I must say, I miss being a nobody and not needing bodyguards with me all the time. We meet downstairs and Damien runs them through what's happening. I ask them to at least stand back and not draw too much attention our way; I want to blend in.

It takes no longer than half an hour to spot a few buskers near Central Station. A group of young girls catch my eye, and I make Damien pull over. I stand at the back of the crowd as I listen to the music; this is what it's all about for me, the passion and love. No pressure. These girls have that.

One girl taps away on her bongos, another plays the flute, the third is on an electric violin, and their sound is beyond amazing. When the girl playing the bongos sings, I'm blown away by her voice. It sends shivers down my spine and goose bumps form on my arms. They are playing "Don't You Worry Child" by Swedish House Mafia, but it's in a different arrangement than what I've heard before, and they totally own it. I watch as they play song after song, switching instruments—adding in ukuleles and keyboards—and my mind is blown.

They start another song, one that reminds me of Amelia, and I push through the crowd. I pick up the ukulele and play. They don't stop to question a stranger joining them; they seem so lost in their art. "Touch the Sky" was one of the many songs Amelia made me play for her, and she was obsessed with the movie Brave . She loved that a girl could be a kick-arse princess. At the end of the song, the crowd erupts, and that's how I remember music feeling.

The girls pack up and talk amongst themselves as I pull all the money from my wallet and throw it in the open violin case. The girl who was playing the flute walks up to me and hands me back my money.

"We can't accept this, Mr Diamond."

"Please take it. You ladies reminded me why I fell in love with music. I lost that over the last few years."

The short blonde girl snatches the money back, and her attitude reminds me of Callie.

"You might not accept his money, but I sure will."

"Sorry about my friend—she has no manners. I'm Penny, and the rude one is Shan, the voice of our trio. And that's Misty." Misty gives me a small wave while Shan is counting the money.

"I'm Eddie."

"Yeah, I know." Penny giggles. "I'm so star-struck right now," she says, blushing. Damien comes closer and whispers in my ear.

"We need to go. The crowd has realised who you are." I look up and he's right.

"Do you girls want to come with me and talk music? I can pay you for your time."

"We're not hookers," Shan throws back, and Misty hits her in the arm. "What? Just sayin'."

"We would love to," Penny says.

Damien and the other security guys help get their instruments into the cars, and Penny jumps in the front seat, calling shotgun. I laugh because I've not called shotgun since Mickki and I were kids. I end up between the other two girls, and they just sit and stare at me for a few minutes. A song I'm not overly familiar with comes on the radio, but Penny turns the volume up and all three sing.

The girls have talked my ear off for the last few hours in my hotel room. Shan has finally let her guard down and joined in, and she's taken a liking to Damien. I tell him to call in someone to replace him, because he's officially off the clock and free to do whatever or whomever he wants. Ten minutes later, Damien and Shan have disappeared onto the balcony.

"So, what is Eddie Diamond doing roaming the streets of Sydney, instead of going to that after-party ACE TV's been going on about for the last few weeks?"

"I wasn't feeling it," I say.

"So, it's about a girl," Misty says.

"Not exactly."

They keep peppering me with questions until I tell them about Callie and how and why we met. I don't tell them about her background because it's not my place, but I tell them about how she makes me smile just thinking about her. When I get to the part about Alex and the shower, they both gasp and a few not-so-nice remarks get thrown around.

"So, why don't you call her?" Penny asks.

"Or better yet, say screw it and go get the girl?" Misty interjects.

"Because I want to show her I can do this by myself and be the man she deserves."

"I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit," Penny says, filling her glass with more champagne.

"I think you see me as Eddie, the famous rock star, and Callie can see the real me under all that. It's hard when I'm not even sure I see the real me under it all some days. I need to find me, not the rock star or the drug addict, just Eddie, you know? And tonight was the first time in forever I remembered why I loved music and how music made me feel."

"Let's play some music then," Misty says, throwing the ukulele my way.

We play music until the early hours of the morning, then I ask the girls if they want to crash here since Damien and Shan went back to Damien's room.

I lead them into the spare room, and it's one of the joys of being a rock star—our rooms are always massive. I never share a hotel room, but they know I need two rooms—or used to, anyway. Sometimes the hot chick has a friend, and I wouldn't want to be rude and leave anyone behind. But then you'd get the odd few who didn't want to join in, hence the extra room.

I also give the girls a shirt each to wear, as I couldn't imagine sleeping in uncomfortable clothes.

Tonight has been the best time I've had in such a long time.

Some hours later, I wake up to the sound of the girls' laughter, and I drag myself from the bed and pull on some jeans. As I walk into the kitchen, all three girls are sitting at the breakfast bar drinking coffee.

"Morning, ladies," I say, and all three reply at the same time, even Shan, who is eyeing off Damien in his uniform.

"So, I wanted to talk to you and see what you'd think about coming with me back to my record label and playing for Oliver. Your sound is amazing, and I want him to hear it."

"As in, Oliver Fontaine?" Misty asks.

"That would be the one," I say.

"Holy fuck, that would be amazing!" Shan exclaims, and Penny elbows her. "What? He is a rock star. I'm sure he swears all the time."

My phone buzzes on the counter, and I see it's Callie.

"Is that her?" Penny asks, and I nod. Why do I feel so giddy and nervous?

"Callie?" I say, answering the call, but the line is silent. Maybe she's butt dialled me—that would be my luck. "Hello? Are you there?" I say, and the line goes dead.

"I think she butt dialled me," I say to the three young ladies all staring me down.

"Call her back, you pussy," Shan says.

"Should I?"

"YES!" they all yell in unison. I hit redial and wait as the phone rings.

"Hello?" she says shyly. Maybe I woke her up.

"Is everything okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I don't know why I called. Being alone and thinking is never a good mix for an addict."

"I've been wanting to call and hear your voice. I miss you," I say, and get a thumbs-up from the girls.

They whisper I should tell her I love her. Shan makes a crude comment about me wanting to screw her brains out and it makes me laugh because it's not far from the truth.

"Oh God, I'm interrupting something," Callie says.

"It's—"

She hangs up on me before I can explain.

I try to call her back, but her phone goes straight to message bank. I tell Damien to take the girls home so they can get some stuff packed for a few days, when Mickki barges through the door, looking worse for wear. His massive sunglasses don't hide the massive hangover he's sporting this morning. Marcus follows close behind him.

The girls all squeal again, and it causes Mickki to hold his head.

"Sore head this morning, brother?"

"You could say that again," he replies.

"What's going on here?" he says, pointing to the girls. "No wonder you didn't show up to the after-party."

"It wasn't like that," I say in my defence, but he looks at me as if he doesn't believe me. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?" I snipe.

"Oh, Sasha called me because Beau wants you to call him. Here's the number."

"Beau, as in Callie's son?"

"Yes, unless you know another Beau."

I snatch the number from him. Damien heads out with the girls and says he'll be back as quickly as he can. We have our private jet on standby to leave whenever we're ready. I go into my room for some privacy, while Mickki raids the mini bar, mumbling about "hair of the dog."

I type in the number and hit call. I'm hoping it's just a lecture about treating his mum right.

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is Eddie," I say unsteadily. Why does the kid make me so damn nervous?

"Thank you for calling me. I don't have much time, but I wanted to ask you to look after my mum. She likes you a lot, I can tell by her need to take care of you. I won't be here to do it, and I need to know she'll be okay."

"Why won't you be here? What's going on?" I ask.

"This day's been coming for a long time, and no one besides Jaynie ever believed me."

"What day, Beau? You're kinda freaking me out."

"My death, Eddie. Just promise me, please."

"I promise. Your mum is special, and I'll always do whatever I can to help her. I love her, and I hope she'll love me back one day."

"She already does," he says. I can hear the shake is his voice and know he's crying.

"Beau?"

"Yeah?"

"Tell me you're not going to hurt yourself. I'm not sure even I could help your mum if you do," I say, trying not to spook him.

"I can't do it any longer. I've known for as long as I can remember, I wouldn't live past eighteen. Even though it's only days away, I can't handle not knowing how I'll go, and at least I have control this way. Make sure she knows it's not her fault."

The line goes dead, and I call him back over and over, but he doesn't answer. Shit. I try Callie and her phone diverts straight to message bank. I run out and ask Mickki to call Sasha and get a number for Callie's house.

"FUCK!" I yell.

Callie still isn't answering my calls. I need to explain to her what just happened, and I need to find her before it's too late.