Chapter 10

TEN

NOLAN

I s there anything more awkward than overhearing a private conversation between two of the biggest pop stars of the last decade?

I came outside after I got Maddy settled to check in with Amber but before I can announce my presence, I overhear Teddy say, "I know I hurt you before, but if you give us another chance, I think we could make it work. We could be a real family."

They haven't spotted me, so I start to back away only to halt when Amber says, "I'm seeing someone."

I should keep moving, but curiosity and surprise keep my feet firmly planted. What is she talking about? Did she rethink the Eden Carmichael setup?

"You are?" Teddy sounds as gobsmacked as I feel. "Who?"

"I wasn't going to tell you, but I'm seeing…Nolan."

My jaw practically hits the ground. Say what?

"You're sleeping with Maddy's nanny?"

"Family assistant," she corrects. "And yes."

He makes an inarticulate sound that perfectly reflects my reaction. My heart rate increases until it feels like it's going to beat out of my chest. Should I be flattered or furious? Flattered, right?

A bubble of hysterical laughter threatens to erupt from my throat, but I swallow it.

"I don't know what to say." Teddy drags his hand through his hair. "I didn't realize you were…he seems good with Maddy, but…he isn't your usual type. He's so…have you thought this through?"

My brows pull toward each other. He believes her. How can that be?

"You're hardly one to judge," she says calmly.

"Shit. I know. No judgment. I'm just surprised." He pauses. "I thought we'd get back together after Maddy was born. And then we didn't, but things have been good between us, and I thought maybe this was my…penance or something. You know…like I had to be patient and let you forgive me before we could be together."

"I've already forgiven you, but we aren't getting back together," she says quietly.

He huffs. "You keep saying that, but I still can't help thinking it's going to happen eventually."

"Teddy." She reaches across the empty space between the loungers. "We?—"

"—have a daughter. We're family."

"I know. We are. Me dating someone else doesn't change that. It's just, I'm happy with Nolan. You need to accept that you and I aren't getting back together," she says firmly.

I know she's lying, and I still believe that she's happily dating me.

"You hardly ever date. I thought—" His voice drops to a whisper. "Is it serious with him?"

"Yes."

"Is he…good to you?"

"Yes."

Why isn't she elaborating? I want her to give details about what a great boyfriend I am even though we aren't dating. I shake my head at my irrationality.

"Good. That's good. You deserve that. I…uh…want you to be happy."

Silence falls between them as he turns so I can see the side of his face. He rubs his eyes and takes an audible breath. On the exhalation, he surges to his feet. He reaches down, hauls her up into his arms, and buries his face in her hair. Without hesitating, she tightens her arms and hugs him back.

I'm oddly transfixed by their embrace—to the point it doesn't occur to me that she has shifted and is staring directly at me. I can tell by her guilty wince that she can see me lurking near the house.

Embarrassed to be caught eavesdropping and more than a little floored by what she told him, I stumble backward into the glass doors and then whirl around and flee inside. My feet carry me up the rear staircase. I plop down in one of the rocking chairs in Maddy's playroom and try to parse the emotions churning in my stomach.

Surprise, obviously, but something else, too.

Something that leaves me feeling flustered, which is crazy.

My brain keeps asking, what if we were dating?

Never in a million years would I have anticipated imagining myself dating a world-famous singer. I've spent my whole life avoiding my father's shadow, and yet, I can't help wondering what it would be like to be in hers.

It's hard to imagine…actually, scratch that, I can imagine it, and it'd be simultaneously amazing and awful.

As beautiful and awkward and lovely as she is, she's also insanely famous and I don't want to be in the spotlight. My heart beats faster the more I think about it. I tell myself it isn't the idea of being in Amber's bed that's making my heart race, but who am I kidding?

It probably doesn't matter anyway—I'm ninety-nine percent certain that Amber didn't lie to Teddy because she's interested in me. She lied because she isn't interested in him. It would be smart if I remembered that.

"What in the hell?" I say when Amber finds me a few minutes later. It comes out harsher than I intend—partly because she looks sheepish and partly because I'm surprised she followed me so quickly. I thought I'd have more time to gather myself.

She squeezes her eyes shut. "I'm so sorry. How much did you hear?"

"You told him you were with me ."

She groans. "I'm the worst. I shouldn't have done that. Obviously I was lying and…I'm sorry," she repeats as she sits down across from me. "It's just…he'll stop asking me to give him another chance if he thinks I'm with someone else and the lie just sort of spilled out."

"Why me?" I ask.

"Why not you? You're new. You're here."

I wince. That's even more unflattering than what I thought she'd say. Reduced to a point five percent chance that she's interested.

"I mean…shit…that came out wrong. The rest of my team have been with me for years. Teddy wouldn't believe I was hooking up with Brian, or one of my security guys, or one of the band, or one of the dancers. He knows?—"

I hold up my hand because I need her to quit talking. "I get it."

"You do?" She sounds surprised.

"Sure. You're talking to the guy who got fired from his last job for sleeping with a married woman. It makes total sense that I'd sleep with my boss, too."

It's her turn to wince. "I didn't mean to imply—" She shakes her head. "I shouldn't have lied. I know better. I'll call Teddy and tell him the truth."

"No," I say quickly, refusing to consider why I don't want Teddy to know that Amber and I aren't fucking. "It's fine."

"It isn't fine. I've made you uncomfortable. I don't want that."

"I'm not uncomfortable," I insist.

She tips her chin down and looks at me through her eyelashes. "You flinched and ran away when you realized I saw you watching us and right now, your skin is flushed and you're sweating. You're obviously uncomfortable."

"Fine." I swipe at my brow. "Maybe a little bit. You surprised me, okay?" My hand drops into my lap. "The truth is, I want to help. If telling Teddy that we're dating gets him to leave you alone, then I'm glad you did it."

"Wow. That's unexpectedly kind." She winces again. "Unfortunately, I didn't actually think it through before I said it. He isn't going to believe me once he sees us together for more than a minute."

"But if we act like we're dating, he'd believe us. We can fake it?" I don't plan to suggest it, but now that I've put it out there, the tension in my body eases.

Her eyes are as big as saucers as she blinks at me. "You'd fake a relationship with me to deter Teddy?"

"To deter him—yes. I honestly don't think I could manage it on a big stage, but for a couple hours in your backyard with just Teddy around, it wouldn't be too difficult."

"Wow. I'm not sure I deserve such understanding." She rests her head on the back of the chair, her gaze shifting to the ceiling. "I wouldn't normally consider lying, but it'd be such a weight off of my shoulders if Teddy and I could settle into co-parenting without him thinking there is any possibility of getting back together." She flicks her attention back to me. "Does that make me an awful person?"

"Umm, no?"

She chuckles. "That wasn't exactly reassuring."

"My parents never married, and they made it work. If you want to be nothing but co-parents, then that's what you should be." Shit. I mentioned my parents. I never do that. Why did I do that?

She still isn't looking at me, so she has no idea that I need her to respond so I can stop panicking that she'll ask about them. Luckily, she sighs and says, "I can't reconcile with Teddy."

"In that case, until you meet someone you're truly interested in or until Teddy accepts that it's over between you two, we'll pretend."

Her expression turns serious. "You mean it? You'll be my fake boyfriend when Teddy is around?"

"Yep." I don't even hesitate.

"Okay. Wow. That's great." She smiles and I feel it everywhere. "Let's talk logistics. I'll have to tell Mina. And Brian. But we'll only have to pretend when Teddy's around."

It seems like he only comes around for a few hours a week, and the tour starts soon, so it shouldn't be too strenuous. "Got it."

"Thank you." The words are soft and heartfelt.

"No problem." I nod steadily. There might be more plans we need to make, but we shouldn't see Teddy for a couple of days at least, so they can wait. "Maddy is asleep so I'm going to head out. I'll see you in the morning?"

I rise to my feet, and she reaches out and squeezes my hand. Her touch feels different somehow, like we're connected. I return the squeeze and let my thumb drag across hers before I release it and say, "See you tomorrow."