Chapter 9

Tyler

Monday rolls around fast, but for once I don't care. They all roll into one these days, anyway. Dinner with my mom and dad was a hoot last night, and I got to catch up with my brothers and Christoph's wife, Amy, and their little newborn, Leon. He's a cute little thing.

Mom's Moussaka was as outstanding as it always is, and she got to asking about my love life, of course. My dad, Theo, tends to keep out of it. But Mom being Mom can't leave it alone. She worries about me.

"You know I'm never going to get any grand babies out of you at the rate you're going," she said, like it was all my fault. And maybe in retrospect it was.

"Mom, don't start."

"Leave the boy alone." My dad was always the peacekeeper in our family, waving Leon in front of her to distract from the subject.

I smiled at my dad gratefully. "You know, I may not even want to have kids, Mom. It's not a crime these days, you know."

Mom gave me a strange look over her glasses. "Don't be absurd, Tyler."

All the while, Dion and Christoph were chuckling their heads off.

"I'm being serious, Mom. Plenty of people these days are waiting until later on, or not at all."

She didn't like the sounds of that idea. It's like the thought has never entered her head.

"You wouldn't want to break your mother's heart, now would you?" She bounced baby Leon up and down on her knee, cooing in his face. She's clearly in her element being a Grandma, and it's hard to believe my parents are even old enough to be Grandparents, as they just don't seem old to me.

"I wouldn't even know what to do with a baby," I muttered.

"It's all poop and scoop, bro," Chris ever-so-helpfully added for good measure.

I screwed my nose up at that idea. "Why not pick on Dion," I interjected, trying to take the heat off myself. "Anyway, how are you and Marissa going?" I offer him a smug smile. Knowing it's on and off at the best of times and his dating life has been worse than my track record.

"About as good as you and Stacey," he fired back. That earned him a stony faced glare from me. I didn't appreciate him bringing her up like that, but my little brother knows no boundaries.

"Thanks, bro, but it's been over with her for a while now."

"Anyone new on the horizon?" Mom looked hopeful, ignoring our jibes back and forth.

God, if only I could tell someone. But it's not like I know if Cindy and I were a thing. One stolen kiss in the car and a few heated glances at the staff meeting are hardly anything to confirm our status.

Usually I'm good at this shit, but with her, I had no idea what she was thinking. She seemed to keep it all close to her chest.

"Nope." I lied, and it must have been pretty believable, because no one bugged me further about it.

"You were meant to do this," I tell my brother and Amy later when they're playing with Leon on Mom's fluffy rug on the floor. Chris is seriously a natural with his kid, something I never really thought about until they announced Amy was pregnant. They've been married for two years now.

"You'll see when it's your own," he said. "They're right when they say it's different."

It's not like I know much about that, even being in my thirties now. I don't know what kind of a father I would make. It seemed like hard work to me. Some of the shit us boys put our folks through growing up was enough to make me think twice about it. I guess we still turned out alright in the end so that's something.

"You need to come visit after the playoffs," dad said. "We'll be at the home games, of course."

"Yeah, I'll be staying a lot more at the weekender," I replied. "Sure looking forward to a break, Pops."

"Just keep your eye on that puck," he said. "I think your mom is right on one thing, though; I think it's the Hawks year this year. With your track record and all."

"I hope so."

"How's your back been?"

"It's been better," I admitted. "A few aches and pains here and there, but nothing that'll stop me."

Dad nodded, but he knew fine well I'd mask it as best I could, anyway. Nothing would stop me playing for the Stanley Cup this year. Nothing.

"We'll be rooting for you, son."

"So far, so good." I smiled. While my mom may be a bit pushy and in my business, she means well and they've both only ever supported me and my brothers in what we wanted to pursue. I know they're proud of me.

I smile when I think about some of that conversation.

The thing I know for sure when I'm heading into Monday's meeting is the fact I want to keep making my parents proud. Between me and Dion, we've certainly been able to set them up for life. They both retired last year. Now Dad spends half his time in his workshop tinkering and Mom loves her garden and creates shit in her craft room.

It feels good that we've been able to provide them with a comfortable retirement with no debts to worry about.

Coach Carter's voice booms through the hallway when I'd mid-way to the vending machine for a refill. I was at my usual place this morning; stalking his daughter. I'm still too chickenshit to go over there and help her carry her files. I mean, the kiss we shared and my hands wandering over her body was hot, but then she pulled back. I don't want to scare her off.

A wave of guilt suddenly washes over me. Especially when coach calls me into his office. His daughter had hold of my shirt the other night as we made out, and like the greedy fucker I am, I wanted more. Even though she pulled away, she was flushed and needy. Like she wanted more but didn't know how to express it.

I know in more ways than one that I'm playing with fire.

It's even more prominent when I'm standing in coach's office and I see the picture of his two girls in a frame on his desk. I swallow as I sit down.

"Everything good?" I ask him.

"I was gonna ask you the same thing."

My heart physically lurches for a second. Surely it hasn't gotten back to him about the restaurant the other afternoon and me giving the girls a ride home? It's not that often I get photographed out and about, but sometimes it happens. I expect it for events and ad campaigns, but not when I'm out in my civilian clothes trying to get to know the girl I like.

I'm about to ask him ‘in what way' when he sits down with a thud and a sigh.

He's not a tall guy, but he's stocky and has that kind of stern look you need to be successful in this role. He's a serious guy. And I may be a lot bigger than him, but there's no way I'd wanna get on his bad side. That's even before I had any interest in his daughter.

"Is the team morale okay from the locker room?" Coach asks.

I let out a silent sigh of relief I'm well aware I'm holding.

As captain, it's one of my jobs to report back to management how the guys are. Especially when it comes to morale. I don't have the honor of having the "C" on my jersey for nothing. It doesn't mean I'm the best guy on the team, or the toughest, though with the latter I know I am up there with the best of them. But it comes down to leadership. Coach has often said that it's more important than raw skill.

I have a responsibility to lead the team and make myself available to each and every player when they need it. Hence, why I focused on turning things around right before I was appointed captain. I can't get away with most of the shit I used to do as a small-time rookie. It doesn't stop them from calling me the Hawks' bad boy, but I'd like to think I'm reformed to some degree.

Coach and management made it clear in no uncertain terms what it meant to be captain. I'm the voice of the team. The guy the team will look to first, sometimes even more so than the coach when things get tough. I study the game in depth too.

I have to be knowledgeable. It goes hand in hand. Taylor is probably the next best thing when it comes to strategy, as I know he studies every game and every pass, too. But I can never afford to be lackadaisical when it comes to the team.

There"re times when I have to adjust on the fly with how fast-changing each and every game can be. Then there's injury and everything else you could throw into the mix.

I always have to have a game plan. And coach always wants to hear it.

It obviously depends on who we're playing as to what our strategy is.

My research is never ending. Along with my thoughts;

What kind of game will the team play this week? Will it be faster paced? Do we have to up the tempo?

Is it a game where things are tight between both teams and we grind it out in a physical, ‘not giving an inch' style of play?

Whatever is decided, it's my job to set an example. And I expect the team to follow my lead.

I guess I'm the most vocal too. And that's what lands me in trouble more often than not. I will defend my guys to the hilt. If a bad call is made, you can bet I'll be the one to make it clear to the referee and confront him about it.

If one of my guys is getting consistently dogged by an opponent, you can bet I'll step in and take matters into my own hands. It's expected, but it's where I can get fired up and get in trouble for going too far. I will always step in when things get too rough, or one of my guys is being bullied or harassed. It's not only my fucking job, but it's my duty. They know they can count on me.

I will always send a very physical message to our opponents.

If it's one of my guys doing the harassing, I then have to do everything I can to disrupt it before it leads to anything more severe.

That's why I can never, ever, afford to falter. I've earned the respect and admiration of the team, and I keep that going by being the guy working from all angles. Again, I ain't saying I'm the best, but I'm always there early for practice and the last to leave. I'm the guy who drives home coach's specific game plan based on what we've discussed.

I like to steer the game to where I want it to go and where I think it should go.

Of course, things don't always go according to plan, and that can reflect badly on me. It's not my sole burden to bear if the game isn't going how it should, but it's my responsibility to keep it together.

I know coach and the exec's took a major chance on me, and I think it's because I've always been a good communicator, as well as being older than the other guys.

I don't want to disappoint them.

In my opinion, Taylor James is the best player on the team. But as it's often been said, there can be issues with putting your best player in the role of captain. While I think Taylor would handle it, there are many factors to it that can sometimes be detrimental to a player. Sometimes a player's production can waiver with the responsibility. Sometimes it can go the other way, and a player can take the job and fly. It's all subjective.

"The team morale is just fine," I tell him, honestly. "Other than Jay's shenanigans, but that's nothing new."

"Fucking Jay." Coach shakes his head.

"But Coach, every one of us on the team is vested," I say. "We all know how important this is."

Even Jay, who has no superstitions, rituals, or anything to keep him in check, and the blondes still give him nightmares. But he's there, like nothing happened the night before. He's never let us down, and I know he's not about to.

It's an away game this week, and we're home for the following week's game.

My cell vibrates in my pocket and as I fish it out and glance at the screen while coach is talking about today's meeting, and training afterwards. I swallow hard as I see it's a message from Cindy.

Fuck.

I quickly shove it back in my pocket. I already feel a little weird sitting here knowing I have a major jones for coach's daughter. I don't need to flaunt it.

Fuck. If he finds out about this, I'll most certainly be stepped down from captain.

If anything happens between us, we either need to hold things at bay until the season is over and we can talk to her father, or we have to nip it in the bud before it even gets to that stage.

The mere thought of doing that doesn't sit well with me at all. I already know that's not an option.

"What about you?" He asks again. "Not letting that woman screw with your head again?"

I glance up at him, taking a second to realize he's talking about my fucking ex.

Not his daughter, asshole.

That's a real heart starter right there. Why do I suddenly think coach has some kind of new insight into my brain? Must be the guilt talking, though I haven't even done anything yet. Nothing like what I'd want to do.

I know Cindy is the apple of his eye. And I know they moved to Seattle when he got the coaching job for the state junior team a few years back and then things progressed.

I also know he's brought them up well. You only have to take one look at Cindy to know that. There's that air she has that tells me she isn't like some of the girls we've all known that go after the hockey guys. She doesn't strike me as that at all. She seems proper somehow, straight-laced, and maybe even a little innocent.

Do I deserve to even be the guy that could potentially taint her? And is that what it would be?

I swallow as he waits for my answer. "Nah, me and Stacey were over long ago. Nothing to worry about there."

He ‘humphs' a response with a curt nod. "Just keep your eyes and ears to the grind, more so than normal. Nothing can fuck this up. I'm not letting another cup fucking flip by our fingers like last year."

"I hear ya," I say, like it isn't on all of our minds already.

"We'll talk after the meeting about tactics for Friday."

"Sure thing, coach." I stretch up out of my seat, and we make our way to the meeting room. My heart is jolting in my chest to see Cindy, and I don't even have a chance to check my phone before I walk in there.

I'm beyond disappointed to see that her chair is empty. Andrea and Simon are there, though. Is she just making coffee, or?

I fish my cell out while everyone else gets seated and things get underway.

Cindy

Hey, Tyler. Sorry I won't see you today I'm not feeling well

I stare at the message and can't help feel despondent that I won't see her today. I hope she's okay. I quickly type back before the meeting gets underway.

Tyler

Sorry to hear that. I hope you're okay

Cindy

I'm okay I just picked up a bit of a bug

Tyler

Let me know if there's anything I can do

Cindy

That's so sweet thank you x

I like that little cross at the end. It gets me through the meeting and it goes by in more than a blur. It's nothing like what I experienced last week with her sitting across from me. I keep looking over to her vacant chair hoping she's just going to appear or something.

The next day, she's not there either. I know because she's not sitting with Andrea and Simon in the cafeteria. Jay and I get up to clear our trays and head back to the locker room when I tell Jay to go on ahead while I stop at her friend's table.

Simon looks up at me as his face reddens and he squeaks out; "Hello?" Like it's a question. I smile to myself. Andrea is equally star-struck, staring up at me with big, round eyes.

"Hey," I say to the pair of them. "I heard Cindy wasn't well?" She told me herself, so I don't know why I'm asking her friends, I guess I just want to make sure she is okay. We texted again back and forth as I wanted to check on her and she said she would be back tomorrow.

"Yeah, that's right," Andrea says, biting her lip.

"Nothing serious I hope?"

Simon is still gaping, and Andrea doing all the talking.

"I think it's just a bug," she says. "Nothing serious."

There was probably no need for me to stop to ask them. Though, from the looks on their faces, I could probably prize anything out of them right now.

"Great play on Friday," Simon says, finally finding his voice. "That tackle in the final minutes had everyone holding their breaths."

We didn't play the best so far, but thankfully still won.

I spare a glance at him. "Thanks, we're taking no prisoners this time around," I say. I'm taking a leaf out of my mom's book and using it as my walking mantra.

I feel the same about something else. And it irks me that she isn't well and can't be there.

Hopefully, she will still be able to make our coffee date before the team heads off for the game at the end of the week. I've been looking forward to it ever since we made plans. I just wonder if we're going to be able to keep it discreet.

I mean, we can always say we ran into each other as work colleagues, so there's a way around getting spotted in public. At least for the first few times.

Surely that won't class as doing anything untoward.

Yes, I'm the captain and my job is to keep everyone in line, including myself.

But there's something just too irresistible about this girl, even for me.

It's going to take a goddamned miracle to stay away from her.