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Chapter Five

Chapter Five

Two months passed since meeting James Vicksburg before Mike posted about his bisexuality on his social media accounts. Mike gave into temptation and read the responses even though people had warned him doing so could be upsetting. Although Mike saw a good number of nasty remarks, most comments were supportive. There were even several flirtatious invitations from men, offering to show him the ropes if his experience was lacking.

He wondered what James Vicksburg would be thinking if he read the news. He had never received the selfies from James that he requested, or for that matter, any text or call at all. It confirmed, in his mind, that James was a straight man who was uncomfortable with what he realized was attraction from Mike. Ghosting Mike was, no doubt, James’ polite way of discouraging thoughts Mike might have about the two of them together.

Mike had seen James on television a few weeks earlier where he was a guest on a talk show promoting his musical. It had been a coincidence that Mike caught the appearance, as he had been surfing channels just as the host had announced who her guest would be. Mike was entranced during the segment, still in awe of how beautiful James was. Even the host commented more than once that she would attend the show just to watch him dance in his short-shorts. Mike found himself agreeing that he would watch it again for that reason, too.

Watching the actor answer questions, Mike admired the man’s composure and humility. James had spoken well of the musical and the talent surrounding him, but had deflected when the host had shared the positive reviews of James’ own performance. When the host had asked if there was someone in his life, Mike had noticed that James had laughed with discomfort before answering that there was not. James had offered the typical celebrity’s excuse that he was too focused on his work to entertain a relationship. The host had never asked James if it would be a man or a woman that would interest James, which was understandable, but Mike wished she had. Despite the evidence of a sexual encounter James had had with his female co-worker, Mike hoped that, like himself, James might also be interested in men.

When the subject of James’ famous father had been raised, Mike noticed the light in James’ eyes had dimmed, though the smile had remained on his face. Mike knew the reaction well. It was the same empty grin he had displayed when answering reporters’ questions about his love life, a look pretending everything was great while hiding that something was wrong or missing. When the host had asked James whether he supported his father’s political positions and views, James had provided a neutral response that he sometimes agreed with his father and sometimes he did not—but that James was not a politician and he would leave it to the people to decide who they wanted to represent them in Congress.

Once the interview segment had ended and the network had cut to commercials, Mike had groaned when one of them was the stylized black and white cologne commercial that he had done. Mike had rolled his eyes as he had watched himself dive into a pool, emerging with water dripping from his bare chest. He had wondered if he was the only viewer who realized the actions had nothing to do with the fragrance that was being hawked. Mike had tried to remember that he had been paid a nice sum of money to shoot water scenes in a skin-tight, black Speedo. Mike now wondered whether the advertiser would continue airing the spot since he had proclaimed himself bisexual.

When the ads had ended and the talk show had resumed, James had been reintroduced so he could sing a number from the musical. It was one of the ballads that didn’t require dancing, and the cameras had panned up and down and in and out on James’ handsome face and build. Mike had found himself, once again, blown away by the man’s talent and beauty and wished James had sent the selfies, even if they never spoke again. Having a picture of himself standing next to James, each with their hands on each other’s backs, smiling in a happy moment, would have brought Mike joy.

Now Mike wondered if he would ever find a man that could enthrall him the way James had, and he thought maybe his agent had been right. If no man could live up to the standard James had set in Mike’s mind, Mike questioned whether there was a reason to have shared his sexual orientation with the public if he ended up with a woman anyway.

“Oh, James,” Mike whispered to himself, looking at the playbill he kept with James’ face on the cover. “What is it about you? I wish you were attracted to me like I am to you.”

Mike pulled the playbill up to his chest and kept it there, falling asleep in the armchair. He relished the peace, knowing that, now that the story about his bisexuality was out, he might be hounded for several weeks to come.

* * * *

“Dude, did you see the news about Mike Cooper?” Billy asked as soon as James let him through the door of his apartment.

“Hello to you, too,” James replied, pulling Billy into a quick hug. “Yes, I saw it.”

“I told you. I just knew it,” Billy bragged, throwing his coat onto James’ nearby sofa. “So, are you going to call him?”

“What? Why would I call him? It’s been over two months since we met. I’m sure he doesn’t even remember who I am,” James answered, picking up Billy’s jacket and hanging it in the coat closet.

Billy went to his favorite recliner and threw himself onto it. “Bro, if you ever want to get rid of this chair, just know, I’m happy to take it off your hands.”

“Good to know.” James smirked. “I hope it will fit whatever your décor is about twenty years from now, because that’s when I’ll be able to afford to replace it.”

“Nah. You’ll have so much money after winning the Tony Award, you’ll be wanting to redecorate just because you can,” Billy teased.

James shot him a wary look. “Stop saying that. I don’t want to see how disappointed in me you’ll be when I don’t even get nominated.”

Billy lost his grin. “James, I would never be disappointed in you. I would say you were robbed. I’d be pissed. But I promise, I would never, ever be anything but proud of you. You deserve to be nominated and to win.”

James walked by the chair and tousled Billy’s hair. “Well, I’m not the most beloved guy on Broadway, thanks to Dad and his politics. Don’t forget, my fellow thespians have to vote, and it’s going to be tough for them to overcome their preconceived notions that I’m a right-wing fascist like Father.”

Billy called out to James as he continued walking into the kitchen, “Beer, please.”

James came walking back to Billy with a bottle in his hand. “What did you think I was going to the kitchen for?”

Billy laughed as he took a swig, watching as James plopped himself down on the sofa. “I think you should text Mike Cooper.”

“Are we back to that?” James asked with mild impatience.

“Yes, we are back to that,” Billy replied. “Bro, the guy is into dudes. I knew he was attracted to you. Why don’t you want to call him? He’s a total stud.”

James laughed. “Were you serious when you said you’d jerk off to a picture of him shirtless?”

Billy looked confused. “When did I say that?”

James continued laughing. “In the restaurant after we met him. You had drunk a couple of beers by the time you said it right in front of Nadia. She laughed it off, but that was bold, even if you were a bit tipsy.”

Billy shrugged. “Nadia knows I’m crazy about her. I would never cheat on her. But hey, Mike Cooper may be the best-looking dude out there. If you didn’t want him, and I wasn’t with Nadia, and he hit on me, I’m not sure my answer would be a flat-out no.”

James was shocked. “What? Are you bisexual?”

Billy took another gulp of beer before answering. “James, if I were, wouldn’t I have told you? There were like one or two guys in high school I imagined trying something with, but when I thought about the actual act, it was unappealing. Mike is one in a million, though. If he wanted to wank in front of me, I could be inspired to join in, I think. But I wouldn’t do anything more than that—even with him.”

James started laughing again. “So, you’re pretty much straight on the spectrum, leaving a little room for you and Mike Cooper to watch each other jerk off.”

Billy seemed to consider it, then nodded. “Yup, that about sums it up. But it’s hardly on my top one-hundred list of things to do before I die. Besides, I love Nadia, so why would I do anything to mess that up?”

“She loves you, too,” James noted. “You two are good together.”

Billy beamed. “We are, aren’t we? Hey, do you think I’m too young to get married?”

James almost choked. “You’re thinking of proposing?”

Billy nodded. “I know we don’t have a pot to piss in, but we don’t need a big wedding. Nadia agrees we’d be wasting money we could use for other things. I just know she’s the one for me, so what’s the point of waiting? I’ve been saving up to buy a ring.”

James was astounded. “Billy, why didn’t you tell me?”

Billy shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I was afraid you’d try to talk me out of it.”

James went to pull his brother into an awkward hug. “I wouldn’t try to talk you out of it. You’re a grown man, and you can make decisions for yourself.” Billy smiled and embraced James once more. “But…”

“Uh-oh, here it comes,” Billy muttered.

James put up his hand to stop his brother. “No, I’m not trying to sew doubts. I just wondered if you thought about what Father would say…or do.”

Billy nodded. “That’s why you can’t say anything. If I do this, we’ll keep it small. We’d invite her parents, my mom, you and Maria. Then I’ll tell Father once it’s too late for him to stop me.”

James went back to the sofa and sighed. “Yes, I think that would be the only way. Dude, I’d try to pay for a bigger wedding for you if we could hide it from Father, but those things are very expensive. I don’t think I have enough saved to even send you guys on a nice honeymoon.” James felt bad because he knew Billy’s mother had no means to help.

Billy shook his head. “I wouldn’t want you to. I would be happy to have a nice dinner after the nuptials with my girl and you.”

James chuckled. “You mean like we always do anyway?”

Billy shrugged. “Why not? Just because we always do it doesn’t mean it isn’t nice. I think there would be something charming about starting off my life with Nadia by following the routine that gives us enjoyment.”

James looked to his brother with affection. “I love you, Billy.”

“Love you too, man,” Billy answered. “Which is why I’m going to keep hounding you to text or call Mike Cooper. You owe it yourself.”

James ran a hand through his hair. “Billy, stop. It’s been too long. He might be pissed that I didn’t follow up with him. He could be dating someone. Like I said before, maybe he doesn’t even recall who I am.”

Billy rolled his eyes. “Bull. You’re making excuses. You hit on people all the time that don’t matter one hoot to you. Why wouldn’t you give it a whirl with someone you admire?”

James began to fidget with his hands. “Because I admire him. I mean, sure, I’d like to sleep with him. I hear he even makes predominantly straight guys interested in voyeuristic hand jobs.” He looked to Billy, who was smiling at the joke. “But I think just sleeping with him would make me sad.”

“Then don’t just sleep with him. See if he’s interested in dating,” Billy suggested.

James groaned. “Are you forgetting what Father did to the last guy I dated?”

Billy sat up straighter. “This is different. Mike Cooper is rich and famous. What’s our father going to be able to do to him?”

“What about me, Billy? Do you remember when I was a teenager and I spouted off about Father’s politics in an interview? Remember how he had our family doctor convince a facility that I needed mental health treatment, and Dad put me in there for a month?”

Billy frowned at the memory. “I know, James. But he can’t commit you now. You’re an adult—an adult with your own doctor and people who can vouch for your sanity. It’s the memory of what he did to you that’s paralyzing you.”

“Of course, it is!” James shouted. “He fucking had me locked up, Billy. And years later, he destroyed my boyfriend’s livelihood. What would he do this time? Have the show shut down? He could do it. He already hinted at that when he first saw the storyline for it. I’m amazed he hasn’t done it already.”

“Maybe he hasn’t because he realizes his power is diminished now that you’re independent. As for Mike, just meet with him and don’t tell Father about it. How would he find out? Like you said, Mike may reject you and that will be that. Or maybe he’ll just want to sleep with you. Hey, it might make you sad to do it once and move on, but maybe it will be worth it to have slept with your idol, huh?” Billy sighed. “Take it one step at a time, okay? We’ll figure it out as we go along.”

“We?”

Billy nodded. “Yes, we. I’ll need you as I try to marry Nadia without Father’s interference. I’ll help you navigate what happens with Mike Cooper.”

“I don’t know,” James said, worried.

“I do,” Billy responded. “I’m emailing you the selfies right now. Then you’re going to send them to Mike Cooper and you’re going to apologize that you took so long.”

“He’ll see the coincidence of me sending them the day his story came out,” James protested.

“Dude, it will be the reason you’re sending them. You need to be honest with him. You’ll message that you didn’t send the photos before because you were mortified to find out that I had told him about you getting intimate with your hand while gazing at his poster. But now that you’ve read his story, you figure he might be cool with the revelation, so you’re following through on your promise. End your text with a congratulations on his announcement, tell him you’re proud of him and suggest he calls you if he’s interested in getting together.”

James put his head in his hands and growled. “Oh God. This could be so embarrassing!”

Billy smiled victoriously. “Good, sounds like you’re willing to do it. I’m sending you the pictures right now.”

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