28. Ive Lost It

28

I've Lost It

Saint

Control .

Violet's lips part for my tongue, and I'd like to think I'm the one who's in control here. My hand wraps her throat to remind her I'm her air. I'm her life.

I could crush her windpipe without much effort.

But then she moans as her fingers roam over the secrets carved in my flesh. Her body shudders, and I tip her head back to kiss her deeper.

Control .

She doesn't know she's my first kiss as she sinks her teeth into my lower lip. But she makes me wish I could peel off my skin just so she could have been my first everything.

My fingers grip her throat tighter, and she loses her breath .

Just for a second.

Just for me.

Her eyes are beautiful when they're bulging and filled with fear. But when I relax my hand, and her pupils dilate as she gulps for air, they're even prettier.

I take her to the edge and then back again.

Control .

I lost it the moment I pulled Violet into my bed. Maybe even before that. Because if I'm honest with myself, I lost it when I slit Liam's throat.

It felt so fucking good ripping open his neck after spending months watching him with her. Holding her hand and touching her. I've never wanted anything more than to paint his chest in his blood.

The fact that he's a traitor is convenient because even if he wasn't, nothing would have stopped me. Not after I learned what he was planning to do to her.

Hurting her is my responsibility alone. Because I'm the only one who knows how she likes it—who knows what she can handle.

I roll Violet onto her back and lift onto my knees between her legs, peeling my T-shirt off her body. Her small, perfect tits beg for my teeth, so I bite into her flesh.

I could spend all night licking every inch of her skin because now that I have her, I want to taste her, to consume her, to breathe her and only her for the rest of my pointless life. She's mine. And I'm never letting her be anyone else's again.

Biting a path down her body, she screams when my teeth sink into the soft flesh of her inner thigh. It's beautiful the way her scream fills the room. How her mouth drops open, and she overtakes every atom of oxygen.

The pitch is desperate in a way that's different from when you're torturing someone—or when you're killing someone.

Her scream is part moan. It's serene. Peaceful. She wants this as she rakes her fingers into my hair and clings tighter.

No one's ever really known me. And even now, Violet's only seen half. But even so, her sapphire eyes burn a path straight to my sick soul. She accepts my secrets without knowing all of them. And she accepts me, no matter how hard she fights it.

I grip her thighs harder and peel them wider. My teeth bite into her other thigh because I have to mark her. And she shivers because no matter how much pain I inflict, she continues to hold herself to that searing iron.

"Kole." Her grip tightens as I move between her legs.

Her perfect pussy waits for me—calls for me. Only I've been inside it. Only I've fucked it.

My tongue slips inside her tight cunt, and every time I think about the fact that I'm the only one to feel her here, I lose it.

Control .

My nails dig into her thighs, and I hold her open. I shove my tongue deeper to feel her squeeze it. I taste how desperate she is for me.

She's beautiful when she tips her head back and seals her eyes shut. When she's shuddering as I fuck her with my mouth, and when she's screaming as I suck hard on her clit. She's beautiful when I kiss her between the legs and shove my tongue inside.

She's beautiful always—and mine.

I need her like I've never needed anything. More than air. More than blood. More than myself.

Climbing up her body, I pull my sweatpants down, and her eyes snap open to mine as I sink between her legs and thrust myself in.

I was wrong—her eyes are even prettier when I'm fucking her. When she's barely holding on.

She locks her legs around my hips, and I plant a hand on the side of her head to fuck her harder. But there's no fucking her hard enough . Nothing breaks her apart quite like she's doing to me.

Leaning in, I nip at her lip.

"You're fucking perfect, kitten." I lick her mouth and eat the moan that falls from it.

Hitting her deeper, she loses her breath.

"Who do you belong to, Violet?"

I need to hear it. Even if I already know. Even if her cunt drips as I fuck it with every ounce of my desperation. I need her to say it. For her lips to admit it over and over until it sears itself into both of us, and there's no backing out of this.

"You." She gasps as I wrap my fingers around her neck. "You, Kole."

This is the first time she's said my actual name when I've been fucking her, and I don't know what it does to me. It mixes me up. It rushes blood to my cock .

I sink my lips over hers so I can taste it. So I can decide what it means to have someone who wants me for me. If that's what this is.

Violet seizes the opportunity and wraps her arms around my neck. She pulls my body flush with hers, and I release her throat. I need to melt myself into her skin.

Burying my face in her neck, I taste her there. She smells like sweat and winter air. No matter how many layers between us, she seeps into my bones.

Fuck, I need her. I don't need people, but she sees me for who I really am.

Her nails dig into my back as I hit her at another angle, and her entire body starts to shake. An earthquake that squeezes my cock and begs for my cum. So I give it to her. I bite her throat and empty myself into her pussy.

Every drop until I pull back and kneel between her legs and hold them open.

"What are you doing?" She's out of breath, panting.

"Admiring you."

My cum drips out of her onto the bed. Her pussy is red and puffy from how hard I've fucked it. She should be spread out in a museum just like this. The most beautiful sight.

Control .

I've lost it.