Chapter 36

36

J en

I refuse to allow myself to be used like this. I am going to fight. I know it’ll more than likely be useless, but I’m going to try, anyway. I have to. I’ve never been one to just give up, and I’m not about to start now.

They’ll have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming. The duke is going to have a hellcat on his hands. If that sniveling bastard thinks he can use and abuse me without any comeback, he can think again, dammit. I’ll make his life a living hell. I’ll make him wish he never made this stupid deal with the general.

I stand there huddled behind the coat rack next to the door that leads to Ice’s office. I have an umbrella in my hand. It’s one of those golfing umbrellas, which means that it’s bigger and far more robust than your average implement. I’m poised and ready for action. I’m going to brain that asshole. Ice will still have a headache tomorrow if I have anything to say about it. In fact, I hope I split his head open enough to see his brains.

I stand there a while, resting the umbrella on the floor. I’m on full alert. Except, it takes so long that I consider taking a quick break. But I know how Murphy works. I know he is a complete dickhead. The moment my ass touches the chair, the general will breeze in.

Nope.

I’m waiting.

I don’t care if it takes all damned day.

Half an hour later, my back feels like it is breaking, but the door finally opens. Yes! It’s my chance. I lift the umbrella and start to bring it down with all of my might.

I realize at the last second that the person I’m about to brain is Steel. I try to stop, but there’s so much momentum behind the swing that I can’t.

Everything goes into slow motion. His eyes widen. Just as the umbrella is about to make contact with his skull, he moves to the side, and I simultaneously redirect the momentum, causing the umbrella to swing just past Steel’s ear by a freaking hair. It’s a near miss, but enough to make us both jump.

“Holy fuck, Jen! What was that?”

I drop the umbrella. “I thought you were Ice. Shit! I’m sorry.”

He gathers me into his arms. “Are you okay?” he asks against my head. “You’re a firecracker.” I can hear he’s smiling. “Maybe you didn’t need Natalia to babysit you after all.”

I’m trembling. I nod as we let each other go. “I am okay now…I think. I thought you said it wasn’t babysitting?” I look over his shoulder out into the reception area. There are maskless guards cuffing two who are still in masks. “What’s going on? Please tell me you know all about Ice? About his plans?”

Steel nods. “Yes, we know. We know everything.”

My shoulders sag with relief. Steel pulls me back into his arms again and holds me tight. “You’re safe now,” he tells me, squeezing me tighter.

“What about you?” My voice is muffled against his chest. I can’t take anything for granted.

We let each other go. Steel takes my hand. “I’m fine. No harm done. Arctic had me jailed for my own protection. He couldn’t tell me anything because Ice has spies everywhere; he didn’t want to tip him or any of his cronies off.”

“Guys like the duke?”

Steel nods. “Exactly. Ice and Jakes are under arrest, and a whole horde of others, too. This thing has been blown wide open. Many of those involved have been arrested.” He goes on to fill me in on the details. “Arctic has said that you can take the next flight home. He’s going to give you the money you were promised…all of it. You don’t have to worry. You and your family will be taken care of.”

“How wonderful.” I force a smile. I am happy. I really am; this is a lifeline for them…for us. But my heart is already breaking at the thought of leaving Steel. We hardly know each other. It’s a little silly, but here I am feeling hurt. Feeling sad that he seems so okay with me going.

Crap! I miss him already, and I haven’t even left yet. Of course, I can’t wait to see my family. Caleb is going to be so happy to see me. I can’t wait to see his little face light up. I’ll hold on to that thought instead of thinking of saying goodbye.

“That’s really great,” I add, rocking on my heels. “When do I leave?”

“There isn’t a flight for another week. Arctic said that if you were desperate, he would organize a charter for you sooner because you’ve been through so much. I filled him in on your abduction and the situation with your family. I mean, he knew, but not the details. I hope you don’t mind?”

“No, of course not. I don’t need a charter. I can wait.”

“Are you sure?” It’s like he wants to get rid of me. “Arctic made it clear that he doesn’t mind.”

“I’ll survive another week. Maybe if I were permitted to give them a call, to speak to my mom and my brother…” My eyes fill with tears at the thought. “I really need to speak to them, Steel. But don’t have him charter a flight especially.” I shake my head. The thought of staying here, of spending more time with Steel, is also appealing; I won’t lie. One more week. A few more days, I’ll take it. “Will I stay here at the palace?”

He sighs. “Yes. If that’s where you want to be. It’s probably safest. I’ll be here, too. I’m going to have to let Roscoe know that I’m quitting. I’m going to assist Arctic with bolstering security here at the palace. Huge changes need to be implemented to the building, as well as all of the current security measures and procedures. I’ll have my hands full for the foreseeable future.”

“That’s great. I’m so glad. Hopefully, the two of you can be friends again. What position has he offered you?”

“No actual position yet. We’ll see.” He shrugs. “I have a lot to answer for. A lot of work needs to happen before I can even start to repair the damage I caused. I’ll never be able to completely make up for it, but I can spend every waking hour trying.”

“You’ll be amazing in whatever role he decides to place you.” I touch the side of his arm. It suddenly feels so awkward.

He bites his bottom lip for a moment. “Now you can go to college, travel, do all of those things you said you wanted to do. The world is at your fingertips, Jen.”

Except, looking into his eyes, there’s only one place I really want to be, and that’s with him. But I can’t have it all, and my family comes first. The money is great; it goes a long way, but they need me, and I need them right back. I want to ask if they can come here. If the three of us can stay, but I don’t. It’s not like Steel and I are even an item. We had sex twice. I’m being an idiot for even thinking about it.

Still, my heart feels like it’s being torn in two. It hurts.

He narrows his eyes on mine. “You don’t look happy with the prospect.”

“I am,” I mumble. “I really am,” I say with a little more conviction. “It’s just a lot to take in. So much has happened.”

Steel waves a hand, and a pretty lady guard walks in. She smiles at me. “Hi, I’m Vivi. I’m going to escort you to your apartment now. Are you ready?”

Your apartment.

Steel and I are going our separate ways. I guess there is no reason for us to be together anymore. I’m no longer his captive, or his charge, or his responsibility in any way.

“Will I see you before I go?” I ask.

His eyes cloud for a moment. “I’m going to be very busy, but I will make time. If we don’t see each other sooner, I’ll make sure I’m at the airport when you leave to say goodbye.”

My stupid heart sinks.

Yep, I’ve definitely bought into this, into us, more than he has. That much is clear.

I make a face. “Don’t worry about it. I know you’re busy. Take care of yourself.” I give him a peck on the cheek. Then I turn and walk away. I don’t look back.

I want to, but I can’t. Tears are welling in my eyes. I can’t let him see them fall.