20

Christina

I wasn't angry. Annoyed, maybe. I couldn't describe the exact feeling in my gut. When I saw the woman's name, my heart stopped. And then when I read her message, it sank. I was about to kick him out when I thought I would give him a chance to explain himself. I usually thought the worst of people and often, they proved me right. So, here I was, driving to a bar, waiting to be proven right once again.

I believed him, yes. I believed he didn't sleep with her. I also believed that he handled her drunk boyfriend. But what I needed to see with my own eyes was the way they looked at one another. That look would tell me if he wanted to fuck her. And if he did, then I was out.

He stared out the window and sighed. He didn't seem nervous, which was a good sign. Guilty people often gave themselves away with their body language. Whenever I examined a witness, I knew which direction to take the line of questioning based on their body's reaction to a particular question. Right now, Will was giving off tired and frustrated.

He continued giving me directions until I pulled into a parking lot across the street from the bar. It was on the lower level, and Will walked ahead of me to open the door.

It was a typical bar. The people inside were talking loudly and laughing. I spotted two servers right away and a bartender. It wasn't very big, but it was crowded, making it feel even smaller.

Will pulled out a seat for me closest to the bar and set up a chair for himself beside it. A server approached our table. My eyes immediately landed on the name stitched into her shirt: Faith .

"What can I get you guys?" she asked in a rushed tone.

Will looked at me expectantly. "I'll have a gin and soda." The server nodded. "And for you?"

"A scotch. Neat."

"Coming right up."

She left, and I scanned the room. "So, which one is Tina?" I asked when no one else made eye contact our way.

Will nodded toward the back. "She's the redhead in the back."

As though we'd called her name, Tina turned and looked our way. Or rather, she looked at Will. Her lips pursed and her head tilted.

My chest tightened as I waited for ‘the look'. She wiped her hands on her apron and said something to the customers next to her. Then she walked toward us.

Will dropped his arm onto the table and leaned back in his chair. I felt more nervous than him at this moment.

What if I was right? What if there was more between them? What would I do? Would I storm out? Would I tell her to back off? I had no idea. I prided myself on being prepared, but this was unchartered territory for me. I'd never been in this position before. Why did I do this to myself?

"Hi," Tina said when she reached us. She stared at Will and I watched them closely. My body stiffened, preparing to feel that tension between two people who wanted each other. To feel that sexual frustration. To feel…

Anything.

But instead, I felt nothing.

"I'm glad you came back. I wanted to apologize again."

"It's all right. I should be the one apologizing to you," said Will. "I was out of line. I said you could call me anytime for anything you need, and then I acted like a jerk."

She smiled. "You did, didn't you?"

He laughed. "Yeah. I did."

Tina turned to me as though just now noticing me there. "Sorry, I hope I'm not interrupting something."

She smiled and waggled her eyebrows at Will. It was such a playful gesture, sort of like a look of camaraderie.

That wasn't the look I was expecting.

It was the look I was too jaded to even hope to see.

What the hell was wrong with me?

"No," I said, "you're not interrupting anything. In fact, you're the person I came here to see."

"I am?" Tina's smile faltered, and she looked at Will. And I felt like the biggest asshole. I didn't want to tell Tina that Will had told me about her situation. It would make Will look like a dick and me an even bigger one for dragging him here.

"Yeah. Will mentioned this place, and I wanted to see it for myself. So far, it's exceeded my expectations."

Her smile returned, and Will exhaled beside me. Just then, the other server arrived with our drinks and set them on the table.

"Well, if you guys need anything else," said Tina, "just holler."

"Thanks," said Will and passed me my drink.

He picked up his glass and clinked it with mine. "To new beginnings?"

I licked my lips and nodded.

The problem was, meeting Tina may have eased my suspicions of Will seeing other women, but it also confirmed what I suspected about him. He had a hero complex. He liked to save women.

And I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I knew I didn't like it when he tried to insert himself into my life. Did it bother me that he did that with other women?

I wasn't sure.

"Do you want to dance?"

I eyed him suspiciously. "Here?"

He smirked. "Yes. Here."

"But no one else is dancing."

"Are you going to let that stop you?"

I shook my head. "No, thanks. I don't dance."

My shoulders tensed at the thought of people watching us dance.

"All right."

He leaned back in his chair and eyed me over his drink. "Are you still mad?"

I sucked at my teeth and mulled over his question. I was never angry with him. I was a little angry with myself. But not him. What I was feeling, frankly, was confused.

I shook my head. "I'm not angry."

He smiled. "Good. Then come here." He grabbed the bottom of my chair and dragged it closer to him. I teetered, and he circled my waist, pulling me closer with my leg practically over his.

"What are you doing?" I asked, surprised.

"I didn't get to hold you last night, and I don't like the distance between us now, so I'm taking matters into my own hands."

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me toward him until my back pressed firmly against his chest. The heat from his body soothed me and I relaxed into his arms.

"I love this song," he whispered in my ear. It was a few years old, but I recognized the bluesy sound.

My heart pounded as I sat there with him.

My body wanted to get closer, but my head warned me to be careful. Will was moving way more quickly than I had expected. He pushed my boundaries and comforted me at the same time. It was confusing as hell and I didn't know what to make of it.

Sex, I understood.

Friendship, I understood.

Sex, friendship, and intimacy. I had no idea how to navigate that.

Will's chin pressed against my temple, and I closed my eyes. My heart hammered in my throat and butterflies fluttered in my stomach. "I need to go to the bathroom," I said, using the table to push myself up.

I walked slowly to the bathroom and grabbed the sink with both hands when I walked inside. Why am I freaking out? Why did I feel untethered? Lost?

There was a fear growing inside of me that simmered deep within me and I was afraid of what would happen if I let it grow.

Keep it together, Christina. Don't freak the fuck out. Take it one day… no, one night, at a time. It doesn't have to be more complicated than that.

I inhaled sharply and fixed my hair in the mirror. This was just a date. I would go back there and enjoy the night.

As I stepped out of the bathroom, I nearly ran into Tina.

"Hey," she said, sidestepping to avoid our bodies crashing into one another.

"Excuse me," I said and turned away.

"Um… are you Christina?"

"Yes." Then a thought occurred to me. Had Will mentioned me to her?

She smiled. "I just wanted to say that I think you're a badass."

I shook my head. "Excuse me?"

She laughed. "Will told me what you did to him. I wish I could grab a guy by the balls and tell him where to go."

I recalled the first day I'd met Will and smiled. It wasn't my finest moment, but Tina seemed to appreciate it.

"Thanks. But I probably shouldn't have done that. Especially now that I know Will better."

"Nah. I think that's exactly what he needed."

Most men avoided me after my bursts of annoyance. Will wasn't scared of me. I wondered if maybe that was why I was starting to fear the situation. I couldn't scare him off so easily.

Tina turned to leave, but I stopped her. Fishing out a card from my purse, I handed it to her. "If you ever find yourself in a tough situation and need to get out, call this number. My friend Gabby will know what to do."

She stared at the card for a few moments, then tucked it into her apron. "Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Walking back to the table, I noticed that the lights had dimmed, and the music was louder. A few people even danced in the middle of the floor, as Will had earlier suggested. I still didn't want to dance, but seeing Will in his seat, his arms stretching the fabric of his white shirt, I knew I wanted something else from him.

I snuggled up next to him again and placed my hand on his thigh. Slowly, I inched it closer to his groin. He covered my hand with his and squeezed it. "What are you doing?" he whispered.

"Making up for something."

"Last night?"

"Not quite."

He loosened his hold on my hand and I reached further down his thigh until I gripped him firmly in hand. He swallowed.

I massaged him through the fabric of his pants, running my fingers up and down his length, and felt his dick harden. "Let's get out of here," he said, his voice rough against my ear. The sound gave me goosebumps. He lifted me from my seat. Dropped a wad of cash on the table and nearly dragged me out of there. I smiled at him as he rushed us through the door. I didn't want to go back to his place. I wanted to drive him crazy. I wanted to push his buttons. See how far he'd go.

"Take me here," I said, stopping on the sidewalk. He looked around. "In the bar?"

I shook my head. "No. Here. On the street."

He stepped up in front of me and leaned his head down. "I can't take you in the middle of the fucking street, Christina. As much as I want to."

"Why not?"

"There are laws. As a lawyer, you should know them."

I shrugged.

"You're fucking serious?"

I nodded.

He swore again under his breath, but I heard him. I knew I was pushing him, but I couldn't stop myself.

He looked to the left and then to the right, finally settling on something. "Come with me."

I raced to keep us with him as he dragged me to the side of the building. It was dark, with only a single light coming from one of the top windows illuminating us. There were shadows around us from creatures I'd rather not think about. And yet, the darkness and the uncertainty turned me on.

I pulled his head down and kissed him harshly. I fumbled with the opening of his pants, but he swatted my hand away and unzipped himself. He wasn't wasting any time. He probably felt the place was unsafe, while I thought it was perfect.

Moving my panties to the side, he pushed himself inside of me without preparing me first. I gasped from the pinch of pain and he stilled inside of me. "Fuck, I'm sorry," he said. But I shook my head. "It's all right. Don't stop."

The pain somehow intensified my need, and I groaned when he pulled out and pushed back in again. "Harder," I cried.

He pinned me with his hips and pumped harder this time, pounding me against the brick wall. The rough edges scraped against my back, but it only intensified my pleasure.

I gripped Will as he pushed deeper and faster, his tempo making it difficult for me to breathe. "Yes," I panted.

He pressed my shoulders against the wall, and my body screamed. A wave of pleasure washed over me and I trembled from my head down to my toes.

Will shouted next to my ear and jerked once more before stilling inside of me.

He pulled away and slowly let me slide down. My panties fell back into place, but they were wet with our lovemaking.

Quick and dirty.

That was exactly what I had wanted.

"I'll take you back to my place," he said, adjusting his clothing.

I hesitated, unsure of what I would say. Unsure what I wanted. But the words came out without much thought.

"I have a big meeting in the morning. Can you take me home?"

He stared at me, and his eyes searched mine. Something crossed his features. An emotion? A thought? I wasn't sure.

"Yeah. I can do that."

He held my hand the whole ride back to my place as I stared out the window.