Chapter 15

Zeke

If there wasone thing I could say I was good at, it would be holding back. I'd held my tongue for four years around Rainey, stuffing down my true feelings and being the friend she needed at the time. Dad died and I stuffed down those feelings too. They were too big, too overwhelming to address when my heart was already bruised from Rainey leaving me behind. I held back every time the girls tried to force me to make friends, knowing I had zero capacity to give myself to a friendship that would probably just blow up in my face. And now that Rainey was here in Blueball this time around, I'd been holding back yet again, showing her I loved her with my actions, but keeping myself leashed so as not to scare her away.

But then she kissed me. She. Kissed. Me.

And I was fuckin' done holding back.

I knew she could feel me. Feel how hard she made me as she pranced around in those tiny shorts, her long blonde hair flicking against her lightly tanned shoulders and back. Her eyes had gone wide, but she hadn't pulled away. I ground against her stomach, letting her feel every inch of me that wanted her. Her eyelids fluttered closed and the heat in her cheeks wasn't all due to the setting sun. Her tongue darted out to wet her lips and I nearly lost all control right there in front of the town I grew up in.

The music turned down and Gannon clapped me on the shoulder. I blinked, lifting my head and seeing that most everyone had gone home. Only Audrey and Boston remained on the makeshift dance floor with us. Boston clearly had the same thought I did: how could I get my woman naked and under me in the next three minutes?

And make no mistake, Rainey was my woman. Not because of the marriage license we both signed either. I might not get her naked like I wanted, but we sure as hell were going to get some things straight between us tonight.

"Go tell the girls goodbye and then meet me inside," I murmured against Rainey's forehead before kissing her there. I forced my hands to let go of her. To step away and turn my back on her. I couldn't just throw her on the ground and have my way with her like an animal in heat, no matter how badly I wanted to.

"Thanks for cleaning up," I told Gannon, seeing how he and Paisley had gathered all the trash in some bags and put away the leftover food.

He pulled his baseball hat off his head and put it back on backwards, waggling his eyebrows at me. "You were a little preoccupied."

"Fuck off," I blustered, knowing he had every right to tease me. I practically made out with Rainey right there in the middle of her birthday party.

"I hope we both get to fuck off tonight, my friend."

I cracked a grin at his crude joke and said goodbye to the rest of the folks remaining. Before long, the backyard was empty, save Daisy who was hoovering the grass for dropped hot dogs and chips. I whistled and she bounded over, her tongue hanging out the side of her snout. Clearly she had a good time at this party too. We stepped inside the glass slider and saw that the living room had been cleared of kids, but blankets and bowls of snacks remained. I'd have to clean that up tomorrow. Right now, I had a wife to find.

"Rainey?" I called out, hoping she hadn't just tipped right into bed and fallen asleep while I was cleaning things out back. I knew she'd had a few drinks, but all my plans for the night would be ruined if she'd had too many to have a conversation.

Music coming from my bedroom suddenly turned on and my head swiveled toward the hallway. A song played that I recognized, but couldn't place. Daisy stayed by my side as we walked down the hallway to my bedroom door. Anticipation built and the usual voice in my head told me not to get my hopes up. I told that asshole to shut the fuck up. Tonight was not about holding back any longer.

As I hit the doorway, I saw Rainey standing with her back to me, her head swiveled so she could shoot me a saucy look over her shoulder. She lifted a hand and pulled at the string on her shoulder, untying one of the bows that held her top up. I stepped into the room and shut the door behind me, keeping Daisy out. I loved the girl but not even she could keep me from what I hoped was about to happen in this room.

Familiar lyrics sang out from wherever Rainey had stashed her phone and she mouthed the words at me over her shoulder, starting with "oh, lover boy." I realize it's a song from Dirty Dancing, the movie she made me watch with her before every homecoming dance. Then her hips began to shimmy and I nearly choked on my own spit, drawn right back to the present. Every hope, every dream I'd ever had about her was coming true right before my eyes.

She pulled the string on the other shoulder and her top fell to her hips, leaving her back bare. Another shake of her hips and her hands unsnapped the button of her jean shorts. A few beats later, as I slowly died inside waiting, she shimmied out of the shorts, letting all the material drop to her bare feet.

Rainey Shaw was finally, gloriously naked in my bedroom.

I sucked in a deep breath, admiring the shape of her legs, the flare of her hips, and the tuck of her waist. She had small tattoos dotting the ridge of her spine where I could see them without the curtain of her hair, symbols I wanted to study and understand. But then she spun around, gifting me with the naked view of her front side. Breasts so beautiful and round I could have wept stared back at me. Dusky nipples pebbled under my gaze. I groaned, not sure how much perfection a man could look at without falling to his knees.

Rainey's eyes were wide as my gaze finally lifted to hers. She was nervous. Even as she boldly stripped for me, there was a part of her that was nervous I'd reject her. She didn't understand that rejecting her was something I simply could not do. It was like asking ice to not be cold. Or leaves to not turn color in the fall. Simply impossible.

So I gave her what she needed. The acceptance she craved as much as she would deny it. I stripped my shirt over my head and threw it on top of her clothes. Her eyes immediately dropped to my chest, want replacing the nerves. Toeing my shoes off, I snapped my belt free of my jeans. A flirtatious grin slipped back onto her face. Shoving the jeans down, I kicked them aside, standing before her perfectly naked, just like her. If vulnerable was how she was feeling, I'd meet her there.

"You're…stunning," I managed to say, the words slipping across the distance between us. Anything I could say would be inadequate, but she deserved the best words I could find. "Perfect."

Her head bowed, and when she lifted it again, her lip was caught against her teeth. "I want you, Zeke."

My eyes slid shut for a split second, savoring the very thing I'd been wanting to hear for years, knowing I'd be playing it on repeat in my head for years to come. My cock, already hard and ready to go the second Rainey had kissed me an hour ago, engorged further.

"And I want you." That was the understatement of the year.

I crossed the room, watching as her gaze dipped to take in all of me. When I stood right in front of her, my dick almost touching her soft skin, her gaze flew back to my face. The nerves were back.

"I don't…"

I cupped her face with one hand, making her hold my gaze. "You don't want what, Rainey? Say it so I know what you need."

I felt her throat bunch as she swallowed. "I don't want to ruin our friendship."

"Then we won't. What else?"

Her eyes pleaded with me. As if I'd let anything come between us ever again. I nodded firmly at her, to let her know that I was serious. Nothing would hinder our friendship. Not twelve years apart. And certainly not sex. It looked like she believed me.

"Then fuck me, Zeke," she whispered, stepping into my body and slipping her hands up to the back of my neck. She kissed the center of my chest, the highest she could reach without me bending down. Just the feel of her lips against my skin made me feel out of control.

I would do anything for Rainey, and had the marriage license to prove it, but I couldn't do that. Not yet. Not now. Not our first time.

Instead, I reached down and slid my arm under her legs, hauling her against my chest and carrying her over to my side of the bed. I laid her down carefully, then stood back to look my fill. She had another tattoo on her left hip. A flock of birds in flight. My index finger traced them all, my mouth following as I bent over her. I knew what they symbolized. Rainey was those birds, needing to fly free. It would only spell heartbreak for me, but I was selfish enough, desperate enough, that I'd take this time with her now. I'd take whatever she could give me. Even if it was never enough.

"Zeke," Rainey gasped as I flicked my tongue against the skin at her hip. Her hands slid into my hair and gripped hard.

"Shh," I murmured against her skin, sliding my hands over her hips and down her soft thighs. Fuck, she was small. But I knew better than to think she was fragile. Rainey was a mighty powerhouse in a small package. And I was going to take my time, tasting every single inch of her.

I stood straight and came around to the foot of the bed, my hands reaching for her feet. Her toenails were painted bright pink and a thin gold chain surrounded one ankle. I bent, kissed the ankle, and trailed my lips up first one leg, then the other. Her smooth skin felt like silk under my fingertips.

"Zeke, please," Rainey begged, her head already twisting left and right on my pillow.

"Shh." I would not rush this.

When I got to her knees, I gripped her thighs and slowly spread them apart. Rainey's breaths began to come in pants, her chest rising and falling rapidly. But she let me open her to my gaze, her pink center already wet and ready for me. Something wrapped around my chest and didn't let go, telling me I was the luckiest bastard in the whole world to have this woman trust me.

I crawled onto the bed and used my shoulders to spread her legs wider, ignoring her aimless pleas. Rainey wanted more, and she'd get more. When I was good and ready. I dipped my head and kissed the inside of each thigh, taking a moment to let her scent wrap around me. Memorizing it. Filing it away in case she left me again. She lifted her hips, chasing my face, and I held her back down with my palm on the center of her belly.

"Greedy, little Rain," I growled.

"Please, Zeke. Stop teasing me." She lifted her head off the pillow to shoot me a dirty look that had no heat behind it. Her eyes were already dazed and I hadn't even gotten to the best part.

"I'm not teasing you." I was making love to her, a distinction she would absolutely hate. And one I wasn't willing to compromise on.

I dipped my head and ran my tongue from bottom to top, smiling against her flesh when she keened loudly, dropping her head back to the pillow. Her taste bloomed on my tongue and I dove back in, a starved man finally being fed. I thrust my tongue inside of her and then back out. Grazed my teeth against her clit and then sucked it into my mouth. Her cries were music to my ears, drowning out the songs coming from her phone. I slid a single finger inside her slick heat and barely paid her clit any attention before she tightened around me and shattered, trembling all over and chanting my name. I grinned, taking my time to ease her down, feeling like I could stay right here all night.

Her hands finally tightened on my hair, pulling me away from her. "Enough!" She giggled, though it turned into a moan again as I slipped my finger out of her. "Please, Zeke."

I climbed over her and lay fully on top of her body, keeping most of my weight in my elbows on either side of her head. "Please what?" I dipped my head and kissed her, the quick peck I intended quickly burning out of control as she dipped her tongue inside my mouth. Fuck, I loved kissing Rainey.

Her fingernails bit into my ass and I broke away from her lips with a yelp. Her triumphant grin only made me harder. Her voice was all candy and honey, dripping with the feminine wile only she could pull off. "Fuck me, please."

A low growl came from my chest. She made it very hard to deny her. Especially when part of me wanted exactly what she was begging for. I pushed away from her and leaned over to the bedside table, pulling out a condom from the drawer. I sheathed myself as she watched, her eyelids heavy, that tongue darting out to lick her lips. She reached for me and I lay back over her, spreading her thighs once again. Notching myself against her, I paused, staring deep into her eyes.

"You're sure?" She probably thought I meant the fucking. What I actually meant was something way deeper. If we did this, she was mine. Not because of a fuckin' piece of paper from the courthouse. She was mine. Forever. Here or long distance.

She nodded, wrapping her leg around my waist and holding on to my neck. I slid one glorious inch inside of her tight heat and nearly came on the spot. Teenage me would have and I thanked my lucky stars for this moment when I was a grown-ass adult and could wrangle some semblance of control.

"Please, Zeke," Rainey begged again, lifting her hips and letting another inch of me inside of her. A moment later, she tried the same move again, but I stopped her, spreading her knees wide and taking away her control. I was going to enjoy every fuckin' second of this and she wasn't going to rush me.

I pulled back and then plunged back in, a little further this time. Rainey squeezed her eyes shut and let out that high-pitched, soft keen that tore me apart. Letting go of her knees, I held her face, my grip not as gentle as I would have liked had I had my full control available. Her eyes flew open in surprise.

"Just like that. Eyes on me, baby girl." I slid in further, rewarding her. Her eyes fluttered, but she held my gaze. Pulling back once more, I gave in and thrust all the way to the hilt this time. She gasped, breathing hard and pulsing around me. I stilled, goose bumps lining every inch of my skin.

"Fuck, you feel good," I mumbled.

Rainey tried to lift her hips again, urging me to move faster, but I wouldn't let her, pinning her to the bed and going at my own leisurely pace. I pulled out and then plunged back in, the feel of her so luxurious and right I was pretty sure I could do this all night long. Again and again until both of us couldn't possibly move.

But the feel of her tightening around me with every lazy thrust had me grasping for control and not finding it. Every moan, every keen, every time her hands roamed to a new part of me she hadn't touched before, I lost more of that control. I felt the moment her muscles sputtered around me. Her body froze and her eyes widened and she tilted her head back, finally breaking the deep gaze we'd been locked in.

She cried out long and loudly, her whole body trembling as she shattered. I looked down at her, dropping south to see where we were joined and that last thread of control was yanked from my hands. Lightning struck my spine and my body went rigid. Time stood still and pleasure treaded the line of pain. Her quakes became mine, and in all ways that mattered, we were one as we both fell over the edge together.