Chapter 43

43

STERLING

A s Dad and I had been getting closer again, I'd brought up the idea of hiring some help again. On the first day of the festival, he'd finally agreed that we probably wouldn't be able to keep up by ourselves and he'd given me the go-ahead.

In the days since, I'd employed several locals to help with the pumpkins and the new hires were definitely making the event run much more smoothly than we'd have managed without them. Delivery trucks were also loading pumpkins to take to other towns, and after I'd gotten in touch with some shop owners in our neighboring counties, we had more orders to fill than ever.

All in all, the farm was doing well and I was enjoying seeing how all my dad's hard work in the patch was paying off. Thanks to him, we had more than enough product to fill our orders and still supply our own bakery and town, and for the first time since I'd been home, I was starting to see that Northfield Farms could thrive again.

It would take money and work, but we weren't dead in the water just yet. It was a massive relief, knowing that there was still something to be saved here, and while I still didn't know just how involved I would be in the rescue, at least I knew there were ways to get it done.

I suddenly saw potential in the property again, no matter how rundown it had become. There was opportunity here. All I needed to do was sit down and get it all on paper. A bunch of new ideas had popped into my head since the festival had started, and even if I could only convince my dad to keep on the help I'd already hired, I knew things would be better once I left.

A few of the men who were working here now had told me they were available for more permanent positions and I was tempted to tell them they were hired, but I needed to make that final push with my dad before I'd be able to do that. Since he and I were in a good place though, I was simply waiting for the right time to bring it up.

On the farm front, things were finally starting to fall into place. Before I'd come here, making a plan for the future of my family farm and my dad had been on the top of my list of things to get done, and while there had been a time when I'd thought it would never happen, it was looking like I might just be able to get it done after all.

The rest of my life, however, was pretty much in shambles. Eric hadn't spoken to me again, but I hadn't reached out to him either. I hadn't seen or heard from Jake, and Daphne had gone radio silent as well.

I'd been doing a lot of thinking about New York and my promotion, and I'd been bouncing back and forth on a decision more than a tennis ball at Wimbledon. One minute, I'd decide for sure that I was going back, and then the next, I'd decide without a doubt that I was staying.

No one could make this decision for me and I wouldn't have let them anyway, but it really wasn't easy. I'd given so much of myself to get to where I was professionally that it seemed almost impossible to even imagine sending in a letter of resignation.

The part of me that had given his all to get out of this town refused to believe that I was seriously considering giving it all up to come back here. On the other hand, there was a large part of me that now knew this was where I belonged.

And around and around we go.

Meanwhile, Henry was still in town, a living, breathing reminder that he and a hundred of others would line up around the block for my job if I didn't go back. The promotion would put me in a highly sought-after position and I hated the thought of being just another guy who'd wasted time when really he hadn't been able to hack it in the big city.

I'd known a few guys like that in my day and I'd heard of many more. A couple years into my career, those guys had been the bane of my existence. They occupied so many of the offices I'd righteously felt should belong to those of us who were in it for the long haul instead.

The thought that I might be one of those guys myself now made me feel sick. I had my dream job all lined up and now I was seriously considering not showing up for it. I just couldn't get past the mental block I'd formed about doing that.

Giving up.

Being just another one of the countless masses who went to New York, worked tirelessly for a few years, and then what? Simply decide, nah, I don't want it anymore?

That wasn't me. Or at least, it never had been. I'd never given up on anything in my life. Whenever the chips were down, I rolled up my sleeves and put my damn back into it.

Now, the only thing I wanted to do that for, however, was Daphne. I wanted to roll up my sleeves and put my back into fighting for her. I wanted to glove up and go a few rounds with her brother, until not even he could deny that she and I had something worth fighting for.

Doing that meant turning my back on the promotion, though, and that was where I got tripped up. I couldn't have both my dream job and my dream girl. Life had never felt more unfair.

Somehow, I'd gotten roped into driving the truck taking a group of tourists around the farm, but while I was talking about the place, my mind was a million miles away. Constantly weighing up the pros and cons of the options available to me, I wasn't really focusing on the sea of faces eager to learn more about the farm where I'd grown up, but I was doing my best not to appear too out of it.

I dropped the first group off in front of the barn, and irritation zapped through me when I saw Fiona standing in line to get on. Looking sexy as hell in a pair of skintight, black leather pants and high heels with soles as red as her lips, she smiled at me and climbed on, sitting next to the rear window so she could talk to me during the ride.

If it hadn't been for Daphne, the outfit might've had some kind of effect on me, but even though I knew that objectively she looked great, I just didn't feel anything. Not in my heart or my cock. Neither wanted anyone else, which was unfortunate.

Life would've been a lot simpler if I could just want Fiona again.

I sighed.

With her long red hair tied up in a sleek ponytail and a necklace on that I'd given her in a previous lifetime, she'd clearly made an effort to look good for me today. I wonder what she'd think if she knew I'd bought that thing at the dollar store.

It was a cute little silver butterfly pendant on a thin chain that I'd gotten her for her birthday while she'd been considering getting a butterfly tattoo. She toyed with it while we waited for all the other tourists to get on, letting out a wistful sigh as she shot me another smile.

"I've missed this place," she said, surprising me with how true it sounded even if I knew how much she'd always hated being out here. "Where have you been, baby? I haven't seen much of you around town."

Instantly irritated, I felt my eyebrows knitting as I stared at her in the rearview. "I've been here, Fi. You and I haven't been together for a decade. Let's refrain from using nicknames like baby that make it sound like we're something more than we are."

I glanced at the tourists to make sure they'd all taken their seats. Once I was satisfied, I nodded and called out to those waiting in line. "We'll be back soon, folks. Thanks for being patient."

One of the guys I'd hired went back to organizing them into groups that would fit on the truck and I glanced at Fiona. "Why did you want a tour? You know everything there is to know about this place."

"Yeah, but like I said, I missed it." She batted her lashes at me. "And I missed you. I've barely seen you since I got here."

"Good thing you didn't come here for me," I ground out, turning my attention to the road and the tour. "Alright, folks. Welcome to Northfield Farms. We're very happy to have most of you here today, on a farm that has been in my family for three generations. My name is Sterling North, and I'm looking forward to showing you around today."

It was the same spiel I'd been giving every year since I was a kid, and it was pretty routine, but at the same time, there was something stirring about saying it again after so long. Fiona leaned forward, putting her face in the window and flashing me a sweet smile.

"I never thought I'd hear any of that from you again. How does it feel?"

"Fine."

"Oh, come on, Sterlo. Talk to me. Let's catch up. I really do miss you, you know."

I bit my teeth. "No, you don't. You just miss the life you used to have."

She frowned, shaking her head. Her hand snaked in through the window and her fingers curled around my shoulder. "That's not true. You and I had some good times together. Do you remember that time when we?—"

"Not now, Fi. I'm giving a tour." Throughout which, she took every opportunity to flirt with me, but no matter how deep I went looking, I just couldn't find any shred of interest or attraction for her.

I finally dropped off her group back at the barn, and one of the new employees took over the tours. Fiona followed me around the patch like dog shit stuck to my shoe. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. "Look, Fiona, no offense, but we're busy. What is it you want exactly?"

Her long eyelashes fluttered again. "Get a drink with me later. Please?"

"I can't tonight," I said immediately. "I've got work to do, and that also means that you need to get going. Thank you for coming. See you around."

With that, I waved and walked away, making sure she wasn't following me again. At the time, I had no idea that she'd taken my response as the door still being open. I hadn't meant it that way, but with hindsight being twenty-twenty, I found out later why it was important to be firm when dealing with an ex.

Especially when dealing with one as tenacious and determined as Fiona Marksmith.