21. Noah

CHAPTER 21

NOAH

H e woke the next morning with his arm wrapped around Sophie, feeling more rested than he had in weeks. She was still asleep, breathing softly. At first he was confused, unsure of how he had gotten there, until the events of last night ran through his head. Nothing had happened. Noah had crawled into bed and held her until they fell asleep. That was all. He convinced himself it was what any friend would do.

He pulled his arm away slowly and checked his phone. It was almost seven thirty in the morning. He sat up, quietly removing the sheets from his legs when Sophie's phone began to ding with her alarm. Noah froze as she stirred.

Sophie groaned, sitting up on her elbows to grab her phone and turn off the alarm. She turned towards him.

"Morning," he said. He did not face her fully.

She replied some form of ‘good morning' in a groggy voice as she sat up fully.

Noah needed to get out of there. It was a mistake to sleep in her bed last night. They had rules for a reason. He hoped that Sophie understood that this didn't change anything between them.

"I'm going to go shower before the appointment," he announced and left the room in a hurry.

Noah showered and got ready quickly. It would take them about thirty minutes with traffic and they needed to be fifteen minutes early.

When he was finished he met Sophie in the living room, where she was digging inside her purse. She looked up at him. "You ready?"

Noah patted his pockets to check for his wallet, keys, and phone. "Yup, let go."

They took the elevator down to the parking level and left in his car. It wasn't until they were almost halfway to the clinic that he realized they hadn't spoken a word to one another.

Noah turned up the radio. He didn't feel like talking, especially about last night, or even two weeks ago at the wedding dress shop. There had been too many close calls for his liking.

They arrived at the doctor's office exactly fifteen minutes early and Noah sat quietly as Sophie filled out some information sheets.

The receptionist called Sophie's name and the pair followed a nurse back to a private room. The walls were painted pastel yellow and filled with posters on the different stages of pregnancy.

The nurse told them the ultrasound technician would be here in a few moments.

Sophie sat on the table covered with hygienic paper and Noah took a seat in one of the three black chairs against the wall. Sophie's hands wrung together in her lap.

"Nervous?" he asked.

"A little."

Before he could ask her why, the technician walked in. She was a short, plump woman with dark hair.

"How are we doing this morning?" she asked. "I'm Pam."

Sophie introduced herself and confirmed that she was here for the twelve-week ultrasound.

Pam nodded along as she glanced over the paperwork that Sophie had filled out.

"So, is this dad?" Pam asked.

Sophie froze slightly, as if trying to gauge Noah's reaction. "Yeah, he's dad."

Pam didn't seem to notice Sophie's tone but Noah did. He wondered if she was still upset about the joke he had made at their first fertility appointment.

Pam instructed Sophie to lay back and tuck her shirt into her bra, then followed up by tucking some kind of towel into her waistband. She informed Sophie that it was there to prevent gel from getting onto her pants.

"Now, usually this gel is pretty cold but luckily for you we have a heated cart," Pam said, grabbing a bottle of gel from the large gray cart.

Sophie smiled nervously as the woman squeezed a glob onto her lower abdomen.

"Nice, right?" Pam gushed. "Now, I'm going to use the doppler so we can see. It might just take me a moment to find it."

Noah couldn't see Sophie's face but her hands were clenched by her sides. He thought about her dream last night, how she thought she was going to be a terrible mother. It was ridiculous, Sophie was going to be an amazing mother. After experiencing his own mother and father, Noah didn't have a doubt in his mind that Sophie would be great. She wanted a child so badly, and he could see how much she already loved them.

If Noah's parents had shown half the affection to him that he knew Sophie would show their child, Noah might have actually turned out okay. He might have actually been able to marry her, to be their child's father—

A noise caused Noah's head to shoot up.

"Is that…?"

"Mhmm." Pam smiled. "That's your baby's heartbeat."

Noah stood from his seat, walking over to the table as Pam turned the monitor towards them.

Sophie sucked in a breath, tears streaming down her face. Noah reached for her hand unconsciously, and she squeezed it.

Her face was the picture of joy as she stared at the monitor. Some sort of pride welled inside Noah. Maybe because he felt responsible for her happiness? He supposed in a way he was; it was his child's heartbeat sounding on the machine. Not his , he reminded himself, Sophie's. He was happy for her, truly. She was getting everything she wanted.

Not everything. Not a husband, his mind yelled. He ignored those thoughts, trying not to be selfish. He wanted to be present in this moment with her.

Noah looked at the screen again, at the tiny baby curled inside her stomach.

Hello, baby.

Noah's next day back at work was a nightmare. He spent half the day just trying to get up to speed with everything that had been happening around the office. When it was finally over, he left feeling drained. Usually the office was his safe space. He just needed to get through this pregnancy and then he would be able to return to the office full-time.

The closer Noah got to home, the more he began to perk up. A part of him was excited to know that Sophie would be there when he returned. He wanted to tell her about his day and the awkward thing that Colin had said in their meeting.

When he entered the apartment, he didn't see Sophie in the living room and went straight to the kitchen. She wasn't in there either, but he'd seen her car in the garage, so he assumed she must be in her room.

It was six thirty, and he wondered if she'd eaten yet. Since Noah had to cook for himself anyway, he decided to make extra in case she hadn't.

He kept it simple — some pork chops, potatoes, and carrots. By the time it was all done, Noah was starving, but he made his way to Sophie's room first anyway.

When he entered the hall, he noticed that her bedroom light was turned off and the nursery light was on. Noah heard what sounded like flopping paper coming from the door.

The door was open but he knocked gently as he entered. Sophie was sitting on the floor surrounded by huge sheets of paper. Her hair was tied up in a messy bun and she wore a white shirt and denim overalls. She looked up as if she didn't realize he'd been home.

"What's going on in here?" he asked, though the answer was pretty obvious.

"Well," she laughed. "I was at the store today and I fell in love with this wallpaper. I got a little excited to put it up and now I think I made a bit of a mess," she answered sheepishly.

Noah looked at the wall closest to him. Half of it was already finished. "Looks fine to me," he told her.

"Yeah, the process itself isn't so bad, it's the design that's messing me up. I mixed up the sheets and now I can't find the next one."

"I can help you after dinner," he offered. "Have you eaten yet? I made you some."

Sophie observed him for a moment and smiled. "No, I haven't. Thank you, I'm starving actually."

"How about I just bring dinner in here? I can help you sort through these while we eat."

"Yeah, that would be great."

Noah returned a few minutes later and set a plate down in front of her.

Sophie groaned in pleasure. "This looks amazing." She dug in immediately. "What time is it?" she asked through mouthfuls of food.

"A little after seven. How long have you been doing this?" he asked.

"Since about three?" She laughed.

Jeez. Four and half hours?

Once their starvation subsided a little, they began trying to match the patterns.

"I just realized I never asked for your opinion. Do you like it?" Sophie said.

"I do, actually." Noah wasn't lying. The wallpaper Sophie had picked out was nice — it was a soft colored forest with trees, bunnies and green foliage. Even if didn't like it, he wouldn't have voiced it. It's not like he would be spending much time here anyway so his opinion didn't matter. Whatever would make Sophie the happiest.

As they worked together, the animals and trees began to line up, creating the perfect woodland theme.

"Yeah, well since I don't know if it's a boy or a girl, I thought it was perfect. And if we ever—" Sophie stopped talking, pretending that she hadn't begun the second sentence.

Noah didn't question her, but he understood what she was going to say. And if we ever decide to have more…

He decided to steer the conversation back to safety. He told her about work, his meeting and the second embarrassment he had gotten from Colin.

Sophie laughed so hard she actually snorted.

"Hey, I don't see any pigs on here. It's a forest, not a farm," Noah joked.

Sophie gasped, playfully punching him in the arm. She wrinkled her nose at him.

Before they knew it, they had finished the entire room.

Noah rubbed at his sore arms.

Sophie stretched hers beside him. "God, how late is it?"

Noah checked his phone. "Midnight."

"Jeez. Aren't you at work tomorrow?"

He yawned. "Yeah, I should probably get some sleep."

"Thank you for your help. I love it." She squeezed his arm.

Noah nodded, already making his way to the door. He was exhausted. "No problem. It looks great."

He usually went to bed early, especially during the week, but the time really had flown by. It usually did when he was around Sophie.