26. Grizzly

26

GRIZZLY

I sit at my desk and stare at the same paragraph on a page I've been staring at for the last ten minutes. I can't stop thinking about the conversation I had with Meredith the last time I saw her. The last time she was in my bed, the last time I was inside her.

I've realized that my feelings for her are getting a little too real, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I haven't felt anything like this for any other woman besides my late wife. I'm not sure how Harlow would feel about it either, considering that the woman I'm falling for is her best friend. I noticed that Meredith has been absent from the club, and I haven't heard from her either. I know something is going on with her, but I'm not sure what.

My thoughts are interrupted by a knock at the door, and Trap walks through without waiting for me to say so.

"I need to know what the hell happened between you and Meredith," Trap says as he plops down in the chair across from me.

"What do you mean by that?" I ask, confused as hell.

"Meredith is having big feelings for one of us or all of us, I'm not sure, but in case you haven't noticed she hasn't been here since the day of the incident. She's avoiding us, Griz," he says quickly.

I have noticed her absence, but I had no idea that was the reason. I need to talk to her, and I need to talk to her now. I'm just not sure she'll talk to me. I need to do something to convince her to stay, but I don't know how to do that.

"I need you to get her here. I need to talk to her," I tell him as I stand from my desk.

"How am I supposed to do that when she won't take my calls and walks right past me like I don't exist?" Trap asks me, clearly frustrated by her behavior.

"I'll go then. Maybe I can get her to listen," I tell him as I grab my keys.

My thoughts are racing all the way to the campus, and I park my bike where she won't be able to ignore me. I'm not going to let her pretend I don't exist. She's not going to pretend she doesn't feel anything for me when I know damn well she does. I feel it in her gaze every time she looks at me. I see her coming out of the building and I throw my leg over the bike, making my way over to her quickly. The look on her face is one of surprise and I smirk at her.

"Hi, darlin', we need to talk," I tell her as I motion for her to follow me to a bench under the shade of a tree.

She follows me without a word, and it surprises me. I thought she'd put up a fight, but she doesn't.

"What do you need to talk to me about? I only have about ten minutes before my next class," she tells me as she angles her body away from mine.

"What's going on? You haven't texted or called any of us and you haven't been to the club in a couple of weeks now. Is everything okay?" I ask, wanting to know if she'll be honest with me.

I watch as tears fill her eyes and my body freezes in shock. I don't want her to cry, I just want to know what's wrong. I reach out a hand and put it on her shoulder, trying to comfort her, but she pulls back as she wipes the tears away.

"Jesus, darlin', I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm just trying to understand what made you disappear on us like that. Did I do something the last time we were together?" I search her face for my answer.

"You haven't done anything, none of you have. The issue is me. I realize that things are getting serious and that scares me. I didn't expect that when we started this," she admits to me.

"Come back, Mer. We want you back with us. I know things have gotten real a little too fast and that's scary, but we miss you. I miss you. Please," I say as I grab for her hand.

She looks at me with a sad look in her eye and I know she's about to reject me. I can't have that. I need her too much to let that happen. I say the first thing that comes to my mind.

"If you don't come back, I'll tell Harlow everything," I blurt out without thinking of the consequences.

Meredith stares at me in surprise and gasps. "You wouldn't dare," she seethes.

"You don't think so?"

I'm not really serious, but I want her to think I am. I won't tell my daughter anything about this, especially if it doesn't work out. I don't need her hating me for deflowering her best friend.

She sighs. "I've missed you too," she admits. She looks around to make sure no one is nearby before she stands up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to my lips, quick but firm. "I'll come back to the clubhouse more often. I need all of you to back off while I'm in class though. I have to concentrate, and seeing you out the window and getting text messages is really distracting," she says with a grin.

"Deal."