Chapter Twelve

The loud ringing of my phone jolts me awake. I throw my arm out, grasping for the noise to silence it before it wakes Mila. Her body is warm and soft against mine, and all I want is to silence the intrusion, roll her over, and slide inside her again.

When I finally get my hand on the phone and bring it toward my face, I curse. It"s my daughter…not a call I can ignore.

"Hi, Daddy," Tahani says as soon as my cell is to my ear. "Did I wake you up?"

I roll over and glance at the clock to find that it"s already after nine in the morning. I"m usually up with the sun, but my sleep schedule has been a little fucked up lately.

I"m not complaining. There"s nothing better than spending half the night buried inside Mila.

She shifts beside me, searching me out. With my red sheets tangled around her, she looks like an angel in her sleep. Her blonde hair is a riotous mess, and her golden skin is soft and smooth. The covers have slipped, leaving one heavy breast and tight, dusky pink nipple exposed. My marks are all over her curvy body.

My heart rolls in my chest at the sight of them, my cock stirring.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah, I"m here." I close my eyes and shake my head hard, trying to clear it of the temptress still sleeping beside me. It"s getting harder and harder to do. Ever since she told me she was all in on the beach a few days ago, I"ve become even more obsessed with her than I was to begin with.

I"m on her constantly, and it still isn"t close enough. I want her incessantly, and it still isn"t often enough. I"ve never felt this way before.

It"s terrifying and exhilarating.

Is this what addiction feels like? The constant need? The endless fucking thirst? Is this what addicts experience?

"How"s Mila?" Tahani asks.

Her question sends guilt whispering through me.

"She seems fine." It's a damn lie. Mila is better than fine. The sadness that clung to her when I first got here is all but gone. She wears a smile all the time now, especially when she's in my arms. But I can"t tell my daughter that.

I can"t tell her that I made her best friend scream my name. I can"t tell her that I slipped my cock between Mila's plump lips and fucked her throat. I can"t tell her that I spent the night making her best friend ride my cock while I said filthy shit to her.

I"m lying to Tahani. I feel like I"m always fucking lying to her these days. And yet, I don"t regret a single moment of what I"m doing with Mila.

I'm fully aware of how fucked up that is.

All I"ve wanted since the moment I found out that I had a kid was to be a good father. To do the right thing by her and make up for all the years her mother stole from us by keeping Tahani a secret.

For the last eight years, I"ve done exactly that. I know my daughter. And there is no fucking way she"d be okay with what"s going on between me and Mila…but I can"t stop.

Fuck. Why can"t I stop when it comes to her?

The answer to that question has my heart threatening to beat out of my chest. It"s enormous, more than either of us are ready for, I think. I shove it away, refusing to go there right now.

I push off from the bed, rising to my feet so I don"t wake Mila. She mumbles incoherently in her sleep but doesn"t stir. I stare at her for a long moment, just drinking in the sight of her in my bed.

She"s a goddess awash in a sea of red. And she"s mine. Her body is mine. Her smart mouth is mine. Her defiance and cries of pleasure are mine. She belongs to me. I"d fucking kill anyone who tried to tell me differently.

"Are you okay, Daddy?" Tahani asks.

"Yeah, kiddo. I"m good." I clear my throat, tearing my gaze away from Mila. Juggling the phone between my ear and shoulder, I yank on a pair of sweats and head out of the bedroom, away from temptation.

"Are you sure? You"ve been…weird the last couple of times we talked," Tahani says, far too fucking perceptive. She gets that shit from me. Until Mila, I was proud of how intuitive she is. Hell, I"m still proud, but her intuition is very fucking inconvenient at the moment. "Is it Mila?"

My heart stops beating for a second.

"She"ll leave if you really want her to," Tahani continues, allowing me to breathe again.

"No." The word is too sharp, too hard. "No," I try again, jogging down the stairs. "I don"t mind her being here, sweetheart. I"ve just got a lot on my mind."

I"m such a fucking liar. The only thing on my mind is Mila. Sooner or later, I'm going to have to find a way to tell my daughter that I'm fucking her best friend. I know this. She deserves the truth. Just...not yet. I can't risk sending Mila running, and if Tahani flips, Mila will bolt. I'm not ready to let her go. I fucking can't let her go.

I make my way into the kitchen and hit the button to start the coffee pot.

"Is it work?" Tahani presses.

My eyes narrow, my lips turning down into a frown the second the question is out of her mouth. "I"m not talking to you about my job, Tahani," I tell her firmly. There"s very little I won"t do for my daughter, but talking to her about my job? Not fucking happening. "You know the rules."

The coffee maker begins clicking before it finally starts spewing hot coffee into the pot.

"I hate your rules," she gripes. "I"m not thirteen anymore."

She sounds so much like Mila bitching about my rules. It catches me off guard. She"s right, though. She isn"t thirteen anymore. She"s grown now, an adult. That doesn"t change the fact that I don"t want her anywhere near my job.

I told Mila about my partner blowing his cover and our case because I had to tell her. I needed her to know for reasons I still can"t even explain to myself. But Tahani? She"s my kid. It"s different for a whole lot of fucking reasons.

"Work is fine," I tell her, lying again. Work is far from fine. Finn's still not sure if my cover was blown or not, and we still don't know where the guns are. But Tahani doesn"t need to know any of that.

I rake a hand through my hair and prop my hip against the counter, staring out the windows at the beach beyond.

The ocean stretches out, an expanse of cerulean blue that meets the horizon in a blurry line. The sun reflects off the waves, creating a mesmerizing dance of light and shadows. Seagulls soar in the sky, their silhouettes against the clear sky like small black specks.

"Fine," Tahani grumbles. "Don"t tell me then."

I can"t help but smile at her tone. She hates not getting her way, but she"ll get over it.

"How"s Sacramento?" I ask as the scent of coffee permeates the air.

"It"s so awesome," she breathes, instantly perking up. "Trent took me to tour the stadium yesterday. It"s fucking huge! I"m so proud of him."

"When"s his first game?" I ask, endlessly fucking relieved Trent was traded to the Kings and not a team halfway across the goddamn country. I hate that Tahani"s fucking dating, but Trent"s good for her. He worships the ground she walks on. That"s all I can ask.

She rambles off the date, chattering a million miles a minute. When the coffee machine beeps, I pour a cup, and promise her that I"ll come to his first game if I can.

My phone vibrates as she continues rambling. I pull it away from my ear, and sigh when I see Finn Bethel"s name on the display.

"Hani? I need to go," I tell her gently.

"Okay. We"ll talk soon. Tell Mila to call me. Love you!"

"Love you too, kiddo," I say before swiping to answer my boss"s call.

"You still haven"t called Brady," Finn snaps as soon as I have the phone to my ear.

"Nope, I haven"t."

"Goddammit, Roman," he curses. "Do you ever fucking follow orders?"

"You know I do." I grind my teeth together. For ten years, I"ve followed Finn"s orders, doing everything humanly possible to help close cases. It pisses me off that he"s questioning me now. I do my fucking job, and I don"t complain. But I"m not calling Brady.

Finn rattles off a string of curses.

"What the fuck is up with you?" I demand. He"s on edge and more pissy than usual.

He curses again, a rough growl of sound. "We have a situation."

His words hit me like a blast of icy wind, sharp and deadly. My heart lurches in my chest as I push off the counter, fear twisting through my veins like a wildfire.

Mila is here, asleep in my bed. If Jose Guerrero finds me here, if he finds her here...fuck. I can"t even finish the thought without a wave of overwhelming panic crashing over me.

"Tell me," I demand, gripping the phone so tightly that it feels like it might shatter.

"Some of Guerrero"s people in Seattle blew up a club with a DEA agent inside. They were using the club to create some new drug."

Panic begins to recede, giving way to searing anger. My grip on the phone loosens.

"They were able to round up most of those involved, but another agent was shot in the process. From what we know, at least one subject with connections directly to Guerrero got away. He"s on the run with what could be millions worth of some new drug they concocted."

"Jesus Christ," I swear, stunned. The last thing anyone needs is some new drug in his hands. With that kind of leverage, he could corner the market on the drug trade, not just in Mexico and the United States, but everywhere. This is why they wanted the fucking guns. This is what they"ve been doing. And we were looking in the wrong place all along.

"How the fuck didn"t we know this?" I growl into the phone, frustrated.

"They weren"t aware of the connection until recently."

"Fuck me. It"s too early for this shit."

"Yeah, well, had you called Brady like I fucking told you to do, you would have known about this yesterday," Finn says, still pissy about it.

"Are you calling me in?" I ask instead of taking that bait. As far as I"m concerned, it"s the only important question right now.

A week ago, I would have welcomed him telling me to get back to Los Angeles. A week ago, I was looking for any excuse to get the fuck out of here, away from temptation. Now though? I"m not ready to go back to work.

I"m not ready to leave Mila.

Finn hesitates for a long moment and then sighs. "No," he says, sending relief through me is a soft rush. "We"re going to sweep up as many of them as we can and pray like hell we slow them down. There"s no reason for you to come back."

He doesn"t say the word yet, but I hear it anyway. I know how this works. If that drug makes it to Guerrero, it"s going to be an all-hands-on-deck situation. I won"t have a choice but to go back because we can"t afford for him to gain any ground, and he will do whatever it takes to keep that drug under his control. Even if he has to start a war to do it.

I stopped praying a long time ago, but the urge hits hard and fast, throwing me off balance. Only, I don"t pray to slow them down or stop that war. No, I"m fucking begging God that I won"t have to leave Mila sooner than planned. Because that? That"s what"s tearing me apart. Leaving her behind.

My entire adult life, I"ve been focused on my job. I sacrificed everything for it. But I"ve had Mila in my bed for a handful of days, and suddenly nothing else seems to matter.

She"s unraveling me, obliterating me piece by piece, and God help us both, but I don"t want her to stop.

When she comes downstairs a few minutes later, I"m still standing in front of the coffee pot, staring out at the beach. My mind runs a thousand miles a minute, but I know the second she walks into the room. Tense knots loosen all over my body, and my dick turns to steel.

"Hey." She wraps her arms around me from behind, resting her head against my back.

"Morning," I mumble, grabbing her hand and tugging until she"s in front of me, trapped between my body and the cabinet.

She tilts her face up to me, smiling softly.

God, she"s beautiful. She"s wearing one of my T-shirts again, her legs bare. Her hair is still a mess, as if she didn"t bother trying to tame it after crawling out of bed. Her green eyes are bright, and her cheeks are flushed.

I study her for a long moment, looking for any hint of sadness or fear, and finding none. The only thing in her eyes as she smiles up at me is happiness, desire, and confidence. I fucking live for knowing I"m giving her back a little of what Damien Wentworth stole from her.

"Are you okay?" she asks in that sweet little voice that drives me wild. She lifts her hand to my cheek, running her fingers beneath my right eye. "You look tired."

"I"m good," I tell her, only partially lying. With her in front of me, I am good. I catch her hand, bringing it to my lips. Her fingertips are soft against my skin. I nip them gently before sliding my hand into her hair and tilting her head back. Her lips part and I dip my head, brushing my lips across hers.

As soon as our mouths meet, she moans, pressing one hand against my abs.

"Roman," she whispers.

My cock jerks.

I love the way she says my name.

I love the way she screams it even more.

Fuck. I need to be inside her.

I lift her up in my arms as the urge to fuck her strikes hard and fast. She squeaks in surprise and then twines her legs around my waist. Her hands go to my hair, tugging. Her mouth doesn"t leave mine. I deepen the kiss, nipping her bottom lip until she opens for me.

Her mouth is so fucking sweet. I can"t get enough of it. I"ve never been big on kissing. It was always just a means to an end, but I could kiss Mila all fucking day and still not have enough of the way her mouth works with mine. Every time she kisses me, she does it like she"s addicted to me, unable to tear herself away.

I groan when she bites my bottom lip and grinds her hot little body against my dick.

"You want me, baby?" I ask.

"I always want you," she moans, still grinding against me.

Fuck.

I break away from her mouth, trailing my lips across her cheek and then down to her neck. She cries out, pulling my hair hard when I suck her skin into my mouth and bite, marking her again. I"m always marking her, leaving behind reminders of who she belongs to. When I can"t be in her, I"m still all over her.

She loves seeing those marks on her body as much as I do.

"Please, Roman," she pleads, whimpering.

"Are you going to let me tie you to my bed and do filthy shit to you?" I ask against her ear. For days, I"ve been thinking about taking her that way. She loves to challenge me, and I live for that shit. But I want her restrained for once, completely at my mercy. I want to know how crazy I can make her before she cracks.

Her body tenses for a split second before immediately relaxing. She whimpers and tries to grind against me again.

"Yeah, you"re gonna let me tie you up," I chuckle, grabbing her round ass to hold her to me.

I release one plump cheek long enough to switch off the coffee pot and then turn with her in my arms. I almost run us into a wall when I feel her teeth in my skin.

She immediately sweeps her tongue across the bite mark, making me growl. As I carry her up the stairs, her mouth is all over me, making me bump into shit the entire way. I don"t even fucking care, though. My dick is so hard it"s painful. I need to be in her.

As soon as I drop her on the bed, she"s on me. Her nails rake across my abs, pulling a hiss from my lips. I don"t know how the hell she does it, but she always knows exactly how to touch me, exactly how much pain to inflict, to drive me wild.

I"m not a small guy. I"m not delicate. I like it hard and rough. I love that she gives it back to me as good as she gets it.

"Arms up," I demand, grabbing her hand before she can get to my dick. If she touches me, this will be over too fucking quickly. We have all day. I plan to take my time.

She grumbles wordlessly, but for once, she doesn"t challenge me. She lifts her arms, allowing me to strip my shirt from her.

"Do you have any idea how sexy you are, Mila?" I ask, biting my lip and palming my cock as I stare at her tits. Her body is incredible. There"s enough of her to grab onto without hurting her. She"s like a pin-up model, my own personal wet dream.

And she"s all fucking mine.

"Lay back and spread your legs," I command, palming my cock again. The things I want to do to her…she has no idea. There"s nothing sweet about the way I want to take her. I want to fuck her, use her, own every inch of that gorgeous little body. I want my name to be the only one she ever screams, the only one she fucking remembers.

Eager to obey for once, she scrambles up the bed on her hands and knees, her bare ass in the air.

I bite back a groan at the sight and reach out, running my hand across her plump cheeks.

"Oh," she gasps when my fingers brush across the crevice of her ass, grazing against her back entrance.

"You going to let me in here?" I ask her, touching that perfect little hole again.

"Maybe," she mumbles, averting her gaze. She wants it but doesn"t think she should.

Fuck that.

"Look at me."

She glances my way again, a blush spread across her cheeks. Her eyes don"t meet mine, instead settling near my mouth. I step closer to the bed and brush my fingers along her jaw before tilting her face up until her eyes finally meet mine.

"I want every part of you, Mila," I tell her, making sure she hears me and that she understands what I"m saying to her. "What we do is our business. No one else"s."

"Okay," she says quietly.

I study her face for another moment. Hesitation still lurks deep in her eyes.

"I want in there," I murmur and run my free hand down her back to her ass again before squeezing. "You squeeze the fuck out of my fingers when I play with you there. You know how many times I"ve thought about how much tighter you"ll be around my cock when I fuck you there?"

"N-no." Her voice shakes, but she"s not embarrassed this time. She"s excited again, imagining me taking here there, claiming every single part of her.

"Soon," I promise and then tap one cheek. "Lay down and let me see that pretty pussy, baby."

A breathy whimper rolls from her lips. She turns onto her back, her hair fanning across my pillows. Her green eyes meet mine again as she slowly spreads her legs for me. She takes her time doing it, fucking teasing me like always, getting me worked up before giving me exactly what I want.

"Fuck," I groan when she"s finally where I want her, spread wide for me. She"s soaked, her juices glistening on the lips of her pussy. I palm my cock again, trying to relieve a little pressure. It"s a fruitless attempt, of course. The only thing that"s going to ease the ache is burying myself in her.

I fucking wish I had ropes to tie her with, but I don't. Deciding neckties will do, I walk toward the dresser across the room and grab two from the drawer.

Mila whimpers when she sees them in my hands. She writhes against the bed, pushing her legs together like she"s trying to find a little relief herself.

"Put your arms over your head, baby," I instruct her, and then wait for her to obey.

As soon as she does, I move quickly, lacing the ties around her wrists and then looping them around the bedposts before she has a chance to get her hands on me again. I tie them tight enough to keep her where I want her but not tight enough to hurt her.

"Oh, fuck," she moans, pulling against the ties as soon as I"m done. Her wide, dilated eyes meet mine. She"s so turned on her breath comes in little pants and sighs.

"You look good tied to my bed," I tell her, kicking my sweats off. My dick smacks against my stomach before I wrap a hand around myself and squeeze, just looking at her.

She"s extraordinary tied down like she is. A flush runs from her cheeks down her neck and onto her chest. Her tits are pushed upward, her nipples dark and hard. She"s spread her legs for me again.

I stare at her pussy, biting my lip. I swear I can already taste her on my tongue. I"m addicted to the way she tastes, like peaches and pussy. It"s quickly becoming my favorite combination.

Reaching out, I pinch her right nipple.

"Roman!" Her body arches off the bed, trying to get closer.

I tease her, tugging and pulling on her nipples, but not giving her any relief. She loves the way I play with her tits. She told me that her breasts were never sensitive when her ex touched them. He was too fucking stupid to know what she needed. Thank God she didn't sleep with him because the selfish prick didn't deserve her.

I'm not him. I know exactly what she needs and exactly how she likes it. She needs a little pain with her pleasure, just enough to make it good. I swear to God, this woman was made for me.

Once she"s whimpering and moaning, pleading with me for more, I stop what I"m doing.

She cries out, glaring at me in frustration as I crawl up the bed toward her, my dick in my hand.

"Open up," I demand, straddling her chest.

I expect her to refuse just to piss me off. She fucking loves to challenge me just to see how far she can push before I lose it and make her submit…especially when I"m not giving her what she wants. But she obeys instantly, licking her lips like my dick is her favorite meal. I"m pretty sure it is.

I run the head against her lips, teasing her again.

"Be a good girl and take all of me," I murmur, easing forward.

She tips her head up, eagerly sucking the head of my cock into her mouth. My head lolls backward, a harsh groan breaking from my lips when her heat surrounds me. Her mouth is fucking perfect. It"s hot, wet heaven for my dick.

I stay there for just a minute, reveling in the feeling before I tilt my head forward again to watch as I feed her my cock.

Her lips stretch around me the deeper I go. She hums and moans, and I know she loves this as much as I do. Hell, she"s told me how she fantasized for four years about me fucking her mouth.

"Goddamn, you feel good," I growl when my cock nudges at her throat. My hands are clenched in tight fists as I fight the urge to thrust deeper.

When I pull back, she whines, silently pleading with those big green eyes.

"You want more?" I ask, fucking knowing she does.

She nods frantically, her body undulating beneath mine.

Christ, she"s perfect.

"Stay still," I warn her.

She instantly stills beneath me.

I thrust forward again. She gags as soon as my dick hits the back of her throat, causing her throat to constrict around me.

As fucked up as it is, I love the sensation of her choking on my cock. Knowing she"s so full of me that she can"t take any more is the hottest fucking thing. I ease back and then press forward once more.

"Let me in," I grunt when she gags again. I"m so fucking big, I"m not sure she can take all of me, but I want it anyway. I"m greedy like that.

I ease back again before sliding forward once more. This time, she swallows when I hit the back of her throat, allowing me to push deeper. Pleasure blasts through me, pulling a loud groan from my lips. I"m in as far as I can go, her lips stretched to capacity around my cock. And Christ, she looks good like that.

I slam one hand against the wall above the bed and hold her still with the other.

I stare down at her, making sure she"s okay, before unleashing all the pent-up emotions inside me. The lies I"ve been spewing to Tahani, the looming possibility of leaving Mila soon, the escalating danger with Guerrero and Francisco...it all boils over and I unleash it onto Mila, using her mouth to rid myself of the guilt and worry and fucking fear.

She moans and whimpers around me as I move, fucking her mouth hard and fast. Her eyes water and she writhes beneath me as I take her throat. It"s mine anyway. Every fucking thing about her is mine.

"Christ, Mila," I growl, quickly spiraling out of control. My balls are damn near against her chin I"m so deep, and it still isn"t enough. I"m fucking rough with her, rougher than ever before, but I can"t stop. The thought of leaving her soon refuses to dislodge. I can"t fuck it away. "Take it all. Fuck, baby. Take every last bit."

She does. She takes everything I give her until my balls draw up. Sweat breaks out on my skin as heat rushes through me. I thrust faster, once, twice. My head kicks back, a loud roar tearing from my chest as I come hard.

She swallows everything I give her. Every fucking drop. Her throat tightens around my cock, sending intense aftershocks coursing through my body. But when the overwhelming sensations become too much, I pull back, watching as she gasps for air beneath me. Tears leak from her eyes and her face is red, but she's smiling like she just won the lottery.

And I know…I fucking know without a doubt that there"s no way in hell I"ll ever be able to let this woman go.