Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Corey

Ashley was here.

Holy shit.

My Ashley.

He was standing across from me, looking even more amazing in person than I thought he would. The muscles I’d traced on his picture all these years were bigger now that I had a 3D version to examine. And his eyes… fuck me, they were the perfect shade of hazel.

“What are you doing here? When did you get back?”

He shuffled his feet from side to side as he looked down at the ground. “I got to the states yesterday. I stayed long enough to say some goodbyes before I bought a bus ticket here. I’m sorry to just show up. I didn’t know of another place I wanted to be at.”

I nearly fell over at his admission. Sure, I knew he didn’t have any other family to visit, and all his friendships were his fellow men and women who’d served. We’d talked extensively about them over the years.

“It’s ok,” I said as I moved closer. My hip bumped into the table, effectively stopping me from getting to him.

His gaze whipped up as the flattop jostled from the impact. The stare he shot my way was filled with so much longing. It created a matching need in me that I had no clue how to meet.

“We should get out of the way so they can work. Have you eaten or anything recently? I’m sure it was a long trip here from wherever you got dropped at.” I motioned for him to move around to my side of the table.

He hesitated only for a second, then he was shuffling to me. The second he was close enough; I couldn’t resist touching him to see if he was real. If not, then this was the most realistic dream I’d ever had. And if he was really here, then I’d just been given the best surprise of my life.

My palm skated over his bicep. I trailed it down until I met his palm. Gripping it tight, I tugged for him to follow me. Where we were going was less important than getting him to the destination. That place being simply away from prying eyes. I’d already felt more than one of the guys watching me as I spoke to Ashley. They’d have questions about who he was and how we knew each other.

It would lead to them discovering I wasn’t the person they’d known for years. The carefree, aloof guy who ate a shit ton of food and poked at anyone to get on their nerves was more a performance than reality.

The truth was much different. In fact, the only person who had a clue of the real me was currently holding my hand as we made our way up the stairs of the big house.

Easing my way inside, I navigated us to the kitchen and motioned for him to sit. “There are leftovers for later. We’ll dig a bit out for you to have now.”

“Oh, no. Don’t do anything fancy for me.”

I shot him a look. “It’s not fancy. And I’ll do whatever I damn well please for you, baby.”

The endearment slipped out with ease. It had been what I’d referred to him as in my head and on paper for a long time, yet it was the first time I’d spoken it aloud. I froze to see what his response would be.

The blush rising on his cheeks told me he was just as surprised as me by the phrase. He didn’t speak up to stop me though, which was good. I couldn’t imagine calling him anything else.

Well, maybe there were other things I could call him.

Mine. That one had a particularly appealing ring to it.

“Thank you,” Ashley whispered from his seat on the other side of the counter.

I got to work putting together a plate full of the food Harlan had made for today’s event. He always doubled his portions now to ensure there was some left for everyone after we cleared out the ranch. It wouldn’t be a problem for me to give some to Ashley.

Once I got the food up to temp, I placed it in front of him with some utensils and a cup of water. I walked around the counter to take his bag from his shoulder. He’d yet to put it down since he walked up to the table outside.

’Cause yeah, I’d spotted him before he saw me. I’d been talking to one of the moms who frequented the market with her kids. They all loved to ask us questions each month to learn all about being a ‘proper cowboy’ as they called it. I’d been mid-sentence when something told me to look at the food table. I’d only spotted his profile but that had been all I’d needed to see to know it was him.

I excused myself to the kids with a promise to let them have even more of my time when they came back. That had appeased them enough to let me go.

Since the moment I’d confirmed it was indeed my Ashley talking to Harlan, my mind had been on overdrive. I’d asked a few questions to get an idea of timelines, though I hadn’t progressed past that. There were a million more things I needed to know.

What was his plan moving forward?

Would he want to stay here at the ranch with me?

Had our letters meant as much to him as they had to me?

Did he want to see if the connection we had transferred to real life too?

Focusing on the time we had alone together before the rest of the ranch descended was important. That’s why I stopped worrying about the growing list in my head to focus on taking care of him.

The smudge under his eyes and the scruff of his beard told me how exhausted he was. He wasn’t one for being unkempt in any way.

It also gave me an idea of how important it was to him to get here. To get to me.

“Give me your bag. You don’t need to hold on to it anymore. It’s safe here.” I lifted the strap from his shoulder. Leaning it against the floor next to him, I pulled up an empty stool to sit beside him.

He watched me just as close as I did him. It was as if neither of us could truly believe what was happening. Despite our disbelief, his stomach grumbled loud enough to pull us both from the stare off.

I pushed the plate closer to him. “Eat. I’m not going anywhere, and neither are you. We can talk after.”

His eyes closed as he breathed out a deep sigh. If I had to guess, I’d say it was relief. That or maybe acceptance. I wouldn’t know more about where his head was at until I knew his basic needs were met.

Ashley dug into his food with gusto. He’d clearly been neglecting himself in order to get to the ranch. That wasn’t going to fly moving forward. He deserved better. He would get better. It was my personal mission until he indicated he wanted otherwise.

When he scraped the last bite of food from his plate, I stood to take it from him. He stood as well, his gaze wild as he watched me.

I pressed my hand over his. “I’ve got this. Have a seat while I clean up. Then we need to go over a few basic things.”

He nodded slowly as he eased back down. I took the plate from him, then cleaned it all up so Harlan wouldn’t have to. The less we disturbed the norm of the ranch, the better.

After I got everything dried and put away, I turned to face Ashley. He sat ramrod straight at the counter, his expression devoid of any emotion. That wasn’t going to work for me.

I moved around until I was standing beside him again. He turned to face me without me having to ask. The position of his legs gave me just enough room to slip between them as I got close. He sucked in a breath at the proximity.

“Ashley,” I said slowly as my hand moved up to his chest. I ran my palm over his rapidly beating heart as I kept his stare locked with mine.

“Corey.” His word held a slight tremble to it.

I shook my head. “Don’t be nervous, baby. I’m not going to do anything to hurt you. I simply need to know what it is you want next. I’ll be happy to take care of whatever that is. You just have to tell me.”

“I don’t know what to say to this. I’m…” His gaze went to the side like he couldn’t voice what he wanted.

“Ashley,” I whispered. He didn’t move. I tried again. “Ashley.”

He turned to me; his brow furrowed. It wasn’t anger I saw there. It was confusion. Like he wasn’t sure what had just happened.

“Baby, I’m trying to help you. Don’t fight me. I’ll understand whatever it is you want. It’s just that, well, you came here first. That makes me think you want to be here. It makes me believe you want to be with me like we’d talked about. Is that what you showing up here means?”

His head bobbed quickly as he blushed a deep shade of red. “I came here for you.”

I closed my eyes at the blatant honesty he gave me. It’s one of the things I’d always loved about our letters. There was no need to pretend or to hide anything. We were two men building a friendship through each exchange.

Until we weren’t. We became more so slowly that I couldn’t even explain when the switch fully happened. It’s as if one day he was Ashley, my pen pal, and then the next he was more.

“Thank you for your honesty,” I told him as a smile graced my lips. His gaze had been on my mouth all morning, his stare hot. “Since we’re being honest, there’s something I want from you too.”

“Anything. It’s yours.”

I tsked at him. “You can’t say things like that, baby. You never know what I might ask for.”

I was merely teasing, but there was so much truth there. If he gave me the option to do as I pleased, then he’d find himself practically chained to my side from now until eternity.

“There isn’t anything you could ask for that I wouldn’t be willing to give.” He leaned into my touch as my palm moved up to his cheek. His eyes closed, a look of peace sweeping over him.

Resistance was a pointless endeavor.

Pressing closer to him, I kissed him like I’d been dreaming of doing for years. Ashley froze for a second before melting into me. His body was mine to bend and mold as needed.

My other hand reached up to trap his head. I moved him into a position that allowed me even more access. He let out a groan, which gave me the opening I needed to taste him. Our tongues tangled together in a dance that seemed like one we’d done before.

Ashley was like coming home and going on vacation all at once. He was the best of everything in this world. All my favorite things could be summed up in him and how he made me feel.

I felt his hands on my waist. I shivered at the contact. God, his touch lit me on fire. I couldn’t get enough of him.

The sound of the guys laughing outside brought an abrupt end to the best kiss of my life. Pulling back, I took in our state of disarray. Ashley was red as a beet from his blush, and I was surely sporting some kind of beard burn. Our clothes wore the signs of being tugged on, though I had no idea when my hands had left his face to do so. And most damning of all were the matching boners we had.

I stared hungrily at the perfect mold of his cock. It was so close. So fucking close.

“Later. I’ll need more of you later,” I groaned. “Right now, we have to face the music. They’re going to want answers. Are you ok with me taking the lead?”

It wasn’t that I feared he’d tell them something they didn’t know. The issue would be easing them into the changes. These guys were going to struggle with the real version of me.

Or maybe they wouldn’t. So much had shifted in the years since I first stepped foot on the ranch. It was anyone’s guess how everything would settle once I blew the lid off.

“I like it best when you’re in charge. It’s what I was kind of hoping for when I came here. I wanted to meet you and see if it was the same in real life as it felt on paper.” He went wide eyed at his words. I think my kiss drunk man hadn’t meant to admit all of that just yet.

Chuckling at his expression, I pressed one more quick kiss to his lips before pulling back. “Then I’ll lead.”

As soon as I said the words, I heard the front door opening. Several pairs of boots stomped their way inside, each seemingly headed in our direction. I gave him one last glance of encouragement before I spun to stand in front of him. Well, him and his erection. No telling how long it would take the big guy to go down. He was clearly packing heat in his jeans.

“Corey! What is this I hear about a friend of yours showing up? I didn’t know you had anyone beside us.” Beau shimmied into the room and poked me in the side.

I rolled my eyes right on cue. “As if! I have people in my life. You might be the center of Jackson’s world, but not mine.”

Jackson shouted an “amen” from the back of the crowd.

Men shuffled into the space until everyone was squeezed into the kitchen and dining room area. Their eyes took in everything about me and Ashley from the tips of our heads to the bottoms of our feet. I saw more than one smirk form at the mussed-up picture we made.

Atticus stepped forward first after a brief, awkward pause. He extended his hand to Ashley. “I’m Atticus Coleman. This here is my family’s ranch. Welcome.”

“I’m Ashley. Nice to meet you. Sorry for the intrusion.”

As he’d always done, my boss waved away his worry. “There’s no need to apologize. In the last couple of years, we’ve had more than our fair share of surprise visitors. They make for some good stories.”

For his part, Ashley didn’t say anything. Not outwardly at least. His skin, on the other hand, gave him away. His burning complexion said he knew something he shouldn’t.

I turned to him and spoke by his ear. “You should have warned me about the blush, baby.”

He pulled back, squinting at me. He shook his head, then leaned to give me his other ear. I repeated the words, to which he nodded quickly.

“Is anyone else going to ask what this is? I’m curious to know why a stranger shows up acting like he knows you so easily when you’ve never mentioned him.” Holt was always a skeptical sort of guy. He and Travis had been in their happy little bubble most of the time, but I could see how someone of Ashley’s stature might be intimidating. I’d have wanted answers too.

Turning to face the group, I gave them an answer to satiate their curiosity. “Ashley and I have known each other for years. I’ve shared about myself and about the ranch. He’s heard stories here and there about you guys. That’s why he blushed about Atticus’s comment. It’s nothing scandalous.”

“As much as I want more details on what’s going on, shouldn’t we all discuss the elephant in the room?” Sean, Atticus’s partner, spoke up next. It drew all attention to him. “Has anyone heard from Gerald yet? Didn’t they say he’d call once he was released so we could go get him from the bus station?”

We’d all been on guard waiting for the exact call he brought up. Since Gerald had gone into rehab all those weeks ago, things had changed. We didn’t walk on eggshells as much and many of the men openly talked about Clancy, Atticus’s deceased father and Gerald’s former partner, with fond remembrance. That couldn’t happen before since it always sent Gerald spiraling.

Today was supposed to be the day he returned home. We’d all had our phones on us in case the call came through. Atticus had even gone so far as to park one of the trucks at the end of the drive so we could easily load up to leave despite the market being in full swing.

“Anyone get a call?” I asked as I checked my cell phone. It was still as blank of notifications as it had been earlier.

The group all gave confirmation that theirs matched mine. I was dialing the rehab facility before Atticus could say another word.

“Hello, thank you for calling —“

“I’m trying to reach Gerald Grimes. He was meant to be discharged today.” I interrupted the guy answering the call with my urgent demands.

He sighed deeply before I heard him clicking around on a keyboard. “Mr. Grimes is no longer a patient here.”

“Do you have any idea when he was let go? We were told he’d get out today and that he would take a bus here.”

“Sir, I’m not privy to that information. I’ve only been on shift an hour, so I can’t say what happened this morning.” He paused, leaving me and everyone else listening to my half on the conversation on edge. “Looks like Mr. Grimes was actually released yesterday morning. I’m not sure how the mix-up happened, but he’s not here, and I’d bet he’s long gone.”

I hung up before he could drag the call out with any more useless information. Facing the men was hard. They all gave me expectant looks as if they expected me to tell them some good news. The only one who could tell something was wrong was the man who shouldn’t have been able to.

Ashley’s hand pressed against my back. It wasn’t meant to do anything other than to show support. Still, I felt like leaning into the touch and pretending none of this had ever taken place. I wanted to believe Gerald was going to call us in a minute to say this was all a joke. We’d laugh and then bring him home.

And now I had to be the one to break the news that this wasn’t possible.

“What’d they say?” Travis Archer, our smallest and littlest of littles, asked about Gerald. I knew he had to be struggling with not knowing what was happening. He was the one who was there when we discovered something was wrong with Clancy. It also happened to be around the time we all suspected the boss and Gerald were more than friends.

Travis had such a gentle soul. I really hated giving him bad news.

Hell, I didn’t want to give anyone bad news. All the guys deserved the truth though.

“He’s not there. The guy said he checked out yesterday and left. They have no idea where he is,” I admitted.

Curses went up from several of the men as they shuffled around the room. “What do we do now?” Sean looked at Atticus for an answer.

He’d be the one to decide. If anyone was the deepest engrained in Gerald’s shit, it was the son of the man he loved but couldn’t keep.

Atticus shook his head. “I don’t know what he was thinking by not calling us, but that won’t stand. We’ll split up and search for him. I hate to think he’d go straight to the bottle, though I’m not foolish enough to think it’s not possible. Ashley and Corey will stay here since he just arrived. I know this means no afterparty time tonight. We’ll make up for it once we’ve got Gerald back home. Everyone good with that?”

A chorus of yeses went up around the room, then the men sprang into action. Ashley and I watched them pack the trucks and take off down the drive.

Part of me feared for how they’d find Gerald and in what condition he’d be in. The rest of me was overjoyed to have the ranch left to us to spend some time alone.

Bittersweet longing filled the empty spaces the men left behind. When I looked at Ashley, I found him watching me as if he were waiting for what comes next. I extended my hand, which he took immediately.

No matter what came next, I knew one thing for sure: I’d fight to keep Ashley through it all.