Chapter 13

Lucifer's POV

Why is the light on in her library?

I stepped off the balcony and headed back to my room to get at least a few hours of sleep. I had been flying for a little over three hours. While I loved flying because it tended to turn my mind off, this time it didn't seem to help. I kept thinking about everything that she said. I kept thinking about her. She plagued my thoughts as I soared high into the dark midnight skies. Even hundreds of feet up in the air I couldn't escape her. Everything reminded me of her. The soft light of the moon reminded me of how bright her smile was when she laughed, the soft clouds reminded me of how soft her skin was, even the way the damn wind blew against the trees reminded me of her, reminded me of how her hair fluttered in the soft breeze. She was everywhere. In my thoughts, in my dreams, in my fucking head. I couldn't get rid of her, yet… I didn't want to.

When I landed I had planned to go straight to bed, to put those thoughts of her to rest like I had been for the past few months but the moment I landed I could see a soft glow coming from her library. I knew she had the light off when I left and there was no possible way she was still awake.

Ever so gently I reached for the dagger that I kept strapped to my thigh and quietly made my way to the door.

She always keeps this door closed. Something isn't right.

Gently I opened the door, pulling the dagger out from my holster.

Oh.

The tension eased from me when I saw her sitting in that big velvet chair. Reading. I didn't even think she realized I was there as she stared at the page and twirled that piece of hair in between her fingers. Lost in her own little world.

I should go and leave her be.

I should have. I was going to but I couldn't make myself move so there I stood. Just watching. It was like I was being held captive, unable to look away as she turned a page in her book and smiled. A genuine smile. The kind of smile that made you believe in kindness and everything good in this world.

I should leave. I really should.

But seeing her here, her freckles on display, looking so happy and content. I couldn't leave. Part of me wanted to go up to her, pick her up, and just have her in my arms, another part of me was content with just watching her be happy.

What is happening to me?

I thought about everything that had happened tonight. I wanted her. I wanted her to be mine, I had almost said it. Granted it was in my head but I almost said it.

She's mine.

NO.

Catalina could never be mine. She was right all those weeks ago. I was jealous. Jealous of that prick. Jealous that he was able to hold her, touch her soft olive skin, and kiss her pretty pink lips. I wanted her. She had no idea how much I wanted her. I wanted her more than I wanted anything else in my life. Yet I couldn't have her. She might not see me as a monster but we both knew what I was. What I was capable of, and even if she wasn't horrified by me today she could very well wake up tomorrow and be disgusted by me or worse. She could be hurt because of me. Gabriel might be actively not trying to kill me but I have killed a fair share of my brothers over the years that had decided to visit. If she was mine, she would be in danger and I couldn't do that to her.

But I could keep her safe.

I would. If Catalina was mine I would spend every single day making sure she was not only as happy and content as she was in this library, but I would make sure she was safe. I'd make sure no one would ever harm her again. The sound of Catalina dropping her book on the floor sprang me out of my thoughts. She had fallen asleep. Her head rested on the side of her chair. Slowly I walked in the delicate scent of Lavender and Vanilla filled me as I carefully picked her up in my arms and carried her to her room.

Her door was already open, Silently I walked in with her and gently placed her on the bed, pulling the covers up to tuck her in. She looked so beautiful, I couldn't stop myself as I placed a kiss on her forehead. There was something about being around her that did something to me. I loved our little spats here and there. I loved our training sessions together. I loved seeing her smile and laugh. I loved seeing her happy and content. I loved our evenings together in the library. I loved those little moments where I could see that wall she had built up slowly come down, piece by piece. I loved-

I glanced back at the sleeping girl in front of me and smiled as the realization hit me with such force it nearly knocked me down. Slowly I leaned down and whispered the confession I had kept even from myself for so long. A truth that I could no longer hide. A truth I didn't even want to admit to myself because If I opened myself up to her, to what this could be, She could be something used against me, something I could lose and I wasn't strong enough for that. But she had to know, even if she was asleep I had to tell her, tell some part of her.

‘I-I think I'm in love with you."

* * *

I couldn't sleep. After I left Catalina my confession still rang out in my head.

I think I'm in love with you.

I couldn't stop thinking about her. About what she could be thinking about, how she felt. Even when my eyes fell shut, those moments slipping into sleep were filled with thoughts and images of her. Her smile, her eyes, the delicate little freckles that graced her face. It was madness. A madness that I would happily lose my sanity for.

I thought about telling her in the morning. Telling her to her face when she was awake, confessing what I had been too afraid to say while she was awake. It didn't sit right with me when I thought about it. The perfect time would come, I just needed to figure out how I was going to say it. How to confess.

The sound of a door's small creek echoed throughout the house followed by soft footsteps.

There's no way she's awake right now.

I had put Catalina to bed a little over two hours ago and she had been completely deep into sleep. She shouldn't have been awake, not at this hour. I reached up pulling the blanket off of me as I got up, grabbing a pair of gray sweatpants and grabbing the dagger I had left on my nightstand as I slowly opened the door. I peered into the hallway, surprised to find it empty. Slowly I made my way to the living room. The house was dark except for the light of a small candle that flickered on the kitchen island. I turned the corner to see Catalina, hair unbound and dressed in black shorts and a matching crop top, had her back to me as she faced the open balcony doors and took a single step outside. The light of the moon shone brightly down on her.

"Catalina, are you alright?" I asked as I inched a bit closer. She didn't respond as she took another step. Something wasn't right.

"Catalina?"

I took another step towards her, but she ignored me as she once again took another step towards the ledge. Slowly she raised a hand as if reaching for something.

I placed my hand on her shoulder. A vibration went through her as she closed her hand and brought it back down to her side before she turned to me. Her eyes were wide with shock and fear as she took in her surroundings.

"What the hell are we doing out here?"

"You walked out here, remember?"

Catalina looked at me as if I had told her the sky was purple.

"No, I didn't."

"You did, you opened the door and walked out here."

How could she not remember what happened just a few seconds ago? I would've thought she was playing some kind of trick on me, some kind of prank but the look in her eyes…

"Do you sleepwalk?"

Catalina shook her head,

"No."

Well, you do now.

Slowly I put my arm around her shoulder as I began to guide her back inside,

"Come on let's get you inside, it's freezing out here."

She nodded her head as she slowly let me lead her inside. Catalina made her way to the kitchen as I closed the balcony doors, taking a little extra time to make sure they were shut and locked properly before making my way over to the kitchen where Catalina now sat at the Island.

"What are you doing up anyway?" She asked as she lifted her head and gazed at me. I took the seat beside her as I spoke,

"I couldn't sleep."

"How come?"

Because I was thinking about you.

I shrugged my shoulders as I leaned into the chair,

"I just have a lot on my mind right now."

"Something important?"

I looked down at her. Her tired green eyes sparkled as the reflection of the light from the small candle danced around in her irises. The dark orange light highlighting the springtime greenness of her eyes and casting a glow on her warm olive skin. She reached up and began to twirl that damn piece of hair again. Even in candlelight, she looked beautiful.

"Very," I whispered back.

Her lips tilted up in a slight smile before she broke her gaze from mine and stared at her hand. For a moment we were silent. I could tell she was thinking. She always twirled that damn piece of hair when she was either stressed, thinking, or utterly lost in thought.

"I had a bad dream." Her voice was soft as she spoke. Her gaze once again found mine.

"A nightmare?"

Catalina nodded her head as she released the piece of hair that she had been twirling and rested her cheek on her hand. Her eyes were still on mine.

"What was it about?"

Catalina tensed as she lifted her head off her hand,

"It's hard to explain but I'm in this weird dark place, sometimes I can see things and sometimes I can't but there's always screaming. So much screaming, sometimes it gets so loud that I have to cover my ears to block it out but it never works. There's also this person there all the time,"

"Who is it?"

Catalina shrugged as she brought up her leg, pulling it close to her chest, and rested her head on her knee,

"I don't know, they're always cloaked in shadows and I can never make out who it is, but they always offer me their hand,"

"Why don't you accept their hand?"

"I have a feeling that if I do something bad will happen in the dream."

I thought back to the balcony, how she had reached out her hand as if she was reaching out to grasp-

"In your dream were you going to reach for their hand this time?"

Catalina nodded her head.

"I just figured that maybe if I finally took their hand then the nightmares would end-"

"Considering you were on the balcony when you were about to grab the entity's hand in your dream, I don't think it's a good idea."

Who knew what would have happened if I hadn't woken up? She could have been hurt or hurt herself in some way.

"I'll have to agree with you there."

We stayed silent for another moment. Our gazes catching on the little flame inside the candle.

"Do you ever have nightmares?" She asked quietly, her haze still locked on the fire that danced around the wick of the candle.

"I did when my father first appointed me to run Hell."

It took some getting used to those first few years. It was hard to drown out what was happening down below. Hard to forget the faces and screams. Hard to forget the pleas and false promises. They haunted my dreams for years and years. I would wake in the middle of the night in a pool of my own sweat, screaming. I had lost so much sleep trying to run and hide from the nightmares that would accompany sleep if I found it.

"How did you get over it?"

"I didn't."

Sometimes those nightmares found me still. Even though I hadn't been home in eons, the memories would plague my mind and in my deepest hours of sleep, the nightmares would return. Catalina snapped me out of my thoughts as I felt her small, soft hand touch mine.

"I don't know why but the idea of you having nightmares bothers me." She said as her small finger traced the lines of the tattoos that covered my hand.

"Does it now?" my voice sounded gruff as little sparks flooded through me.

"Haven't you already been through enough? You lost everything, the last thing you need is to lose the comfort and sanctuary of your mind."

"The same could be said about you."

Catalina looked up at me. A confused and puzzled look shined in her eyes.

"Haven't you been through enough as well?" I whispered as I looked down at the small girl who at a young age had prayed for death to escape a house of horrors. A girl who had taught herself how to block out pain. A girl who had survived brutal acts of abuse at the hands of those who she believed loved her. A girl who had been through so much that she became a woman who had built walls around herself so thick and high that no one could find a way in. A woman who forced herself to be so strong and formidable to make sure nothing could hurt her, that she didn't know who she was under all that armor.

I rose out of my chair, picked up Catalina, and placed her on the island, bringing her eye level with me. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders as I gently brushed a piece of hair from her face. Those twinkling green eyes locked on mine as I spoke,

"If you'd let me I would hunt down every person who harmed you and I would bring you their hearts."

"Why? Why would you do that?" She said breathlessly as her hands gripped me tighter and she pulled me in closer. My hands drifted down to her waist, my fingers tightly wrapping around her.

"Because I care about you and the thought of someone harming you angers me. greatly."

My eyes shifted from her eyes to her pink lips.

Just one taste. One little taste…

I leaned down pressing my forehead to hers, my lips mere inches from hers.

Catalina's eyes closed as she relaxed in my grip, tilting her head slightly she leaned in closer.

The sound of my phone ringing startled us. Causing us to release each other and break apart. I pulled out my phone to see a text from Gabriel.

Perfect fucking timing!

Catalina lifted herself off the counter, running a shaky hand through her dark hair. A slight pink blush decorated across her cheeks,

"I-I'll see you in the morning."

"Catalina-"

She rushed past me, practically running towards her room. Determined to put distance between us. I pulled out my phone as I heard the soft click of her door shutting.

Just checking in. Is everything okay?

I locked my phone, shoving it back into my pocket leaving Gabriel's message unanswered as I glanced at the seat she had occupied at the kitchen island.

I almost kissed her. I almost had her lips on mine, almost got the chance to find out what she tasted like, what her lips felt like. For a moment I got a glimpse of what it would be like if she were mine.

* * *

Why the hell is she brewing coffee this fucking early?

I rolled out of my bed and put my shirt from last night back on and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

Damn, I look like shit.

It was true. I was out until two in the morning just flying around and Catalina's nightmare occurred around three in the morning. I glanced at the clock on the nightstand beside me,

7:00 AM.

Four hours of sleep. Great.

If she's making coffee, she better be prepared to share.

I tossed on a pair of gym shorts and made my way to the kitchen, mainly to ask her how the hell she was awake at this hour but instead of Catalina in the kitchen, It was Gabriel.

"Well, don't you look beautiful brother?" He chuckled as he turned around and finally saw me.

It is far too early to be this sarcastic.

"What the hell are you doing back so early?" I grabbed a cup out of the cupboard and made my way to the coffee pot.

"Your note said you wouldn't be back until this afternoon."

Gabriel shrugged,

"My plans finished early."

Story of your life isn't it brother?

"Is Catalina still asleep?"

Gabriel smirked as he motioned his cup to the balcony.

"See for yourself."

I rushed over to the balcony and saw her.

She's smiling and using her gift. But she's smiling.

"I don't know what happened and frankly I'm too afraid to ask but whatever you did. I'm glad. It's been a while since I've seen her smile, let alone while using her flame."

Her flame.

I thought about it last night. How familiar it felt. How when I reached out to grab her hand, it didn't burn me, and what she said last night, That it calls to her. That she could hear a million voices calling out to her…

"What is it?" Gabriel asked as he turned and leaned against the banister.

"I don't think her gift is from Hecate."

Gabriel turned to look at me,

"I think her fire is from the pit itself."

I glanced back at Catalina.

Why does that bring me joy?

Knowing that some part of her was connected to me. In a way it… it made me…

Happy.

"You think her fire is from the pit? That would make her fire-"

"Pure Hellfire." I finished for him as the corner of my lips began to tilt up.

I should've known the second my hand touched hers and her fire didn't burn me but I was so caught up in her that I had assumed she put it out before I touched her hand. Hellfire could never harm me, I ruled over it, and for a while in the beginning, I commanded it.

Perhaps that was why her hand felt so warm.

Gabriel looked back at Catalina and I could sense the worry radiating off of him yet I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

"How do you even know it's Hellfire?"

Without taking my eyes off Catalina I answered him,

"Last night we got into some trouble and she conjured up a little bit of it, I reached out to touch it and it didn't burn me."

It was a twist of what happened but Gabriel didn't need to know all the details but that has to be why I felt so drawn to her. Because she carries an essence of home.

"What kind of trouble?"

"That guy she went on a date with showed up, she took care of it and I made sure she got home safe."

I still wanted to kill the bastard and if he made the mistake of running into Catalina again, I would.

Gabriel nodded as he un-clenched his fists,

"How can she possibly wield Hellfire? She's mortal."

"I don't know but believe me brother I am going to find out."

It shouldn't be possible. Technically speaking I was the only one who could wield Hellfire. Well me and one other person and as far as I knew, she didn't even know Catalina existed. So how the actual hell did this happen?

"We should tell her so she knows-"

"No."

I could already feel the argument approaching so I continued,

"She is just starting to get comfortable with it, the last thing we should do is backtrack and make her afraid of it again."

Because she would be. The minute we told her what her fire was, there was no doubt in my mind she wouldn't take it well. She believed she was a monster and telling her she had Hellfire, I was afraid she would start to believe that lie.

The sound of her soft laugh drew both of us back to her. I watched as the delicate red and orange hues caressed her legs and arms, encasing her as she spun and twirled.

Dancing. She's dancing with Hellfire and she is not afraid. She is remarkable.

"So what's the plan then Lucifer?"

"We're going to have to get into contact with someone who knows everything about everyone and has the answers to every question."

Gabriel turned back to me as we both answered,

"The Fates."

* * *

Gabriel's POV

"Well, I'll be damned girl. If you keep that up you'll be able to heat frozen pizza in no time."

"Gabriel! You're back early!" Catalina screeched as she rushed up and hugged me.

"Well, what can I say I missed seeing your annoying face every day."

I laughed as she innocently punched my shoulder,

"I'm serious though, you are improving. I'm proud of you." I said as I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her in.

"Yeah well If I had gotten accustomed to it sooner I'd probably be doing advanced tricks that would even surprise you."

I had no doubt you would be.

Who knew what she would be capable of today if I didn't hold her back all these years? She'd be amazing.

"So you're feeling better about it? About using your gift?"

Catalina tensed up just a bit before she spoke,

"It's getting easier thanks to the training and the breathing techniques Lucifer taught me. I feel somewhat in control over it."

"Why do I feel a but coming up?"

I smirked and looked over to see that she closed her eyes.

"I don't want to be a monster. I don't want to be like my mother and enjoy hurting people."

Monster?

"Why would you think you're a monster?"

She was silent for a moment and I started to think she wouldn't answer me.

"Lucifer and I went out last night and the guy I went on that date with tried to make a move on me and I flipped out."

She paused and I could see her taking deep breaths and steadying herself.

"When Lucifer got me out of there I could see people staring at us. At me. They looked at me like I was a monster."

"You used your gift, didn't you?"

Catalina slightly nodded her head.

"Catalina there is a place and time for your fire tricks and last night was one of them."

I turned to face her, a smirk playing on my face.

"I could've hurt him, Gabriel."

"Being worried about hurting people who want to hurt you isn't something a monster or your mother would worry about."

She remained silent for another moment,

"I wanted to though. When I saw the looks on their faces. I wanted to scream and burn the place down. No one except Lucifer had even seemed concerned about why I attacked him."

Fuck.

I pulled her close,

"Doing what you need to do to keep yourself safe does not make you a monster. You did what you had to do to make sure you remained safe."

She returned my hug and wrapped her arms around me. For a moment we stood like that.

"Where's Lucifer? We were supposed to train today."

Shit, he forgot…

"He had a quick errand to run so he asked me to come out and train with you today."

Please buy it please please, please

"You sure you'll be able to keep up?" She smirked as she tossed an extra dagger at me.

"Loser has laundry duty for the rest of the week."

"You've got yourself a deal."

Oh, this will be fun.

* * *

Shit, she's getting good.

Keeping an eye on the dagger, Catalina went left, I ducked just before her dagger connected with the side of my head. While still low I kicked her right knee and she went down.

Her eyes are still green. She's learning.

I went to stand over her and she tried for the low blow again.

Nice try.

I caught her foot but she pulled me in and kicked, launching me a good distance away from her.

Smart Girl.

Within seconds she was up and I was on her again. The sound of our daggers clashing together pierced the sky.

Damn, she's fast!

I went to kick her in the stomach but she caught my foot and pushed me to the ground, straddling me as she gently pressed her dagger against my throat.

Well Shit

"I win." She said breathlessly.

"Best eight out of ten." I rebutted as I gently pushed her off.

We had been at this for about two hours now and while she had gotten one over on me every single time, I knew I could beat her. She stood up and reached her hand to help me up.

"Gabriel we've been at this for hours, take the loss, my guy."

She handed me a bottle of water as she practically chugged hers down within a matter of seconds.

"Fine you win, but next time," I smirked at her,

"You are so going down."

Catalina laughed as she tossed her water bottle to the side,

"If you say so."

We packed up her things and made our way back towards the house. The air-conditioned room felt great against the heat radiating off of us.

"Why don't you get in the shower and wash up and I'll go see what's taking Lucifer so long," I said to her as I made my way to the door.

"Sounds good to me." She waved me off as she made her way to her room. Only when I heard the sound of her door clicking shut and the water begin to run did I head out the door.

Why do I have a bad feeling about this?

* * *

Lucifer's POV

"Are you sure you have everything we need?" Gabriel asked for what seemed like the tenth time.

I swear if he asks one more time I'm ripping out his tongue.

"Yes, Gabriel I have everything. I have the spindle, the thread, and the shears. We just have to do a simple summoning ritual and we'll be fine."

Hopefully.

"Let's just be careful. The fates are related to Nyx and she frightens me."

I chuckled,

"You should be frightened, even Zeus is frightened of her."

I started assembling the circle, four candles for the four elements, and a ring of black salt.

"Maybe we should get them cell phones?" Gabriel interjected

"I got Freya one last year and she loves it."

He can't be fucking serious right now.

I turned to face my brother.

"You got the Norse goddess of love, fertility, battle, and death a cellphone?"

He shrugged,

"I was tired of doing shit like this plus she thinks the emojis are cute."

I'm going to throttle him.

"I hate lying to her about this," Gabriel said as he finished completing the circle of black salt.

So do I.

"I am not particularly happy either but we need to figure out how she got Hellfire."

Lying to Catalina leaves a bad feeling inside of me but we have to know. After this, I wouldn't lie to her about anything. Just this once and that was it.

"So what do we do now?"

"Now brother," I dusted off the dirt on my knees as I stood beside him.

"We wait."

* * *

One Hour Later

"Okay, maybe we messed up something," Gabriel said for the fifth time. I rolled my eyes,

"We didn't mess up anything, just relax."

Gabriel glanced down at his watch,

"It's been over an hour how much longer are we supposed to wait-"

"You would do well to remember patience, Gabriel."

Gabriel's face paled as he took in the three women standing before him.

Clotho, the youngest and shortest of the three, Eternally young with soft olive skin and rich brown eyes. Her wavy brown hair pulled into a high ponytail. Lachesis, the middle child, was paler than her two sisters yet still regal with her green eyes, her hair longer and darker than Clotho's stood out against the pale white attire she always wore, And then there was Atropos, The oldest and tallest of the trio. Her skin was a fine caramel color, and her dark black hair was loose and rested on her waist. Her yellow eyes were so much different than her sisters.

"It has been a while since we have seen each other," Clotho said, looking straight at me.

"Due to certain circumstances, I have been pretty busy, my friend."

Clotho nodded her head slightly.

I'd known Clotho since the beginning. She was easily one of the least annoying of all the deities I had encountered. She was always honest and straight to the point, which I admired most about her and her sisters. No nonsense kind of girls.

"We heard what happened Lucifer,"

Of course, they did.

"I am sorry that you had to lose your home. I can't imagine what that must be like." I nodded my head in acknowledgment before I spoke.

"It is not easy. I imagine for you it would be the same as losing a sister."

"What can we do for you both?" Clotho asked as she clutched her hands in front of her.

This time it was Gabriel who answered.

"We need to see the past of a certain friend of ours."

"Mortal or Immortal?"

"Mortal."

Clotho looked at her sisters for a moment, I knew what we were asking them was a huge risk. Revealing the person's past could very well change that person's future as well as others.

"We wouldn't ask if it wasn't for something important."

"There is only so much we would be able to show you,"

Gabriel and I nodded.

"We understand."

We would take anything they could give us, so long as it showed us what we needed to know. I knew doing this was a risk, that there was a chance they would say no or we wouldn't be able to get the information we needed. But it was worth a shot.

"Very well, do you have an object belonging to this person?"

Gabriel pulled out Catalina's music box and handed it to Clotho.

"The name?"

"Catalina Alvarez," Gabriel answered.

Shit, I didn't even know her last name but Alvarez? I knew she had Hispanic descent in her history!

Placing the music box down, Clotho reached over and took her sister's hands, forming a circle. A soft glow of light begins to form in between the circle they've made, hovering between them. I glanced at the sisters and saw that each of their eyes had turned milky white. The light inside the circle was slowly getting bigger and bigger. Everything around us seemed to fade away into the distance as Gabriel and I stared at the light, watching as a heavily pregnant female who looked like a darker and shorter version of Catalina appeared.

That has to be her mother.

My gaze followed back to the vision in front of us and Gabriel and I held our breath as we watched the story that played out in front of us.

* * *