Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

Jackson

I slept well with Ayen cradled against me, his warm body acting like my own personal space heater and keeping me toasty all night long while our bodies were entangled with each other.

He fit perfectly, practically molded against my body like a second skin that was always meant to be there. I loved it. I loved everything about the situation and only regretted having to wake us both up once the sun was beginning to lighten the sky outside of the cabin's window.

I brushed my lips along the column of his neck, sucking just hard enough to wake him but not enough to leave marks behind like I was dying to. When I got him out of this mess, and I could finally take him home back to my place in the city, I'd make sure that every inch of his perfect tan skin was flushed red from my teeth.

I rolled my hips against his, both of us already half hard.

A soft moan escaped him, breathy and still half asleep. He craned his neck back, giving me more access to run my tongue up to the shell of his ear.

I wanted to take my time with him, savor all of this. He was meant to be taken slowly, lovingly, with the time and care and dedication of a seasoned lover who knew how to worship him the way I'd been dying to since I first laid eyes on him.

He moaned again when I moved my hand under his shirt, caressing his stomach and the faint happy trail leading down to the waistband of his pants. He ground his hips up against mine, teasing me with his eagerness.

I rolled him over onto his back and moved on top of him, pining him down against the mattress with my hips against his. His lashes fluttered open, showing me those pretty doe-eyes of his that were still hazy from sleep.

God, he was so fucking gorgeous it was honestly unfair.

Bending down, I caught his lips with mine, loving how easily he parted them for me to slip my tongue between. I dipped my hand under his waistband while I shifted my hips up just enough to wrap my hand around his pretty little cock.

It stiffened instantly with a few long pumps, drawing another groan out of him.

That sound was music to my damn ears.

He brushed his hands over my pecs with his gentle touches all the way down to where my jeans were belted. He rubbed me over top of the material, making my cock jerk against my leg where it was pinned inside of my pants.

I pulled away from our kiss, nipping him until I reached his ear again. "Tease."

He chuckled softly.

Letting go of his cock, I pulled my hand out from his pants and moved it around to the small of his back, getting ready to lift him up and pull him into my lap.

Before I could though, Ayen's shifted his hand from where he had been rubbing me through my jeans and slipped it into my pocket in order to tease me some more. I groaned when he brushed the fabric of my pocket against the sensitive tip of my cock while retrieving something from it.

I was barely paying attention to anything other than getting him flustered and naked under me and it wasn't until his body stiffened under me that I was broken out of my own haze.

Ayen shoved an elbow at my chest, practically knocking me right off of the bed from the force of it. At the last second, I grabbed onto the lip of the top bunk to catch myself. "Baby?—"

"W-What the hell is this ?"

As soon as I turned to look at him again, my entire body froze. Pinched between his fingers was the folded over sticker of the visitor pass I'd been given yesterday by CWI.

His hand was shaking, eyes wide in disbelief as he stared at it.

Fuuuck!

"Ayen, listen. I can explain." A stabbing pain shot through my chest when he skittered away from my outstretched hand, lunging off of the bed in order to press himself against the wall farthest away from me.

"Why do you have this?"

"Baby…" I lifted off of the bunk.

"Why do you have this!" His eyes were filling with tears again, although this time it wasn't out of pleasure.

I wasn't sure what to say.

How could I explain any of that to him?

My heart knocked against my ribcage. "Ayen..."

He took in two shuddering breaths before he said, "Did you visit him?"

I nodded. There was no point in lying when he was holding the evidence right in his hand. I didn't want to, anyway, although I would've rather he found out about this much differently.

Going to visit his ex-husband had been eye opening, more so than I could've ever imagined before stepping into that situation.

Ayen was shaking his head, mumbling ‘no' over and over again.

"It's okay." My voice was soft as I spoke. "Nothing's changed."

"Did you see him?"

I hesitated before nodding again, imploring him with my gaze, begging him to try to understand.

He let out a pitiful sob and slowly slid down the wall until he collapsed onto the ground. My instincts were screaming to go to him, to pull him up into my arms and rock him until his grief passed.

What I saw in that care facility had been shocking, but not because it had been caused at the hands of Ayen. True disgust had filled me when I saw the man who had abused my baby bird for so long was being well taken care of by the staff there with, presumably, his parents' money lining their pockets.

The anger I felt, the unadulterated rage, was a feeling I'd only ever felt one other time in my life before, and that had been at Carter's funeral where I'd witnessed my dad shedding a single tear over his casket while it was being lowered into the dirt.

Ayen's ex didn't deserve to have a healthy amount of weight on him, or to be clean and smelling fresh when I'd approached him in his wheelchair, or the privilege of being able to stare out the window where a bird feeder was hanging to entertain what little was left of his mind.

What that scum of the earth had earned was a one-way ticket to hell, and nothing less.

Instead, he got to spend the rest of his life being taken care of like a baby while my own was stuck behind bars.

Not wanting to scare him, I lowered myself down onto the floor as close as I could get. "Honey..."

His legs were drawn up to his chest, arms curled tightly around his knees, while his shoulders shook from his sobs. It was brutal to watch, and even worse to think that he believed I saw him any differently than before because of it.

I would never. I could never.

"Go..." he finally choked out.

I shook my head, reaching over to breech the distance between us. "Ayen?—"

He slapped my hand away the second it touched him. "Go!"

Stunned, I stared at him.

"Leave," he swallowed. "Or I'll scream."

That aching sharp pain stabbed me in the chest again. Robotically, I climbed to my feet, still staring down at him. Hoping that he'd change his mind. But all he did was simply bury his face back into his knees and hold himself tighter.

The air in my lungs was sucked out breath by breath as I crossed the distance between him and the front door.

Regret was a knife that carved my heart out of my chest when I opened the door and snuck out into the morning sun, leaving it behind.