Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

"Miss Abrams?" Mrs. Davies called out in a soft, singsong voice.

A knock rapped at Lily's door. She rolled over, wiping the sleep from her eyes as she pulled her room into focus. Soft morning light seeped into the room around the drawn curtains. It took a moment to remember where she was. She was used to the sounds of songbirds, her stepsisters bickering, and her stepmother snapping at the dogs to be quiet. But here, she sank into the mattress, reveling in the sounds of the waves crashing against the shores down below the beach. She was warm, but she was still wearing Rafe's jacket.

She rubbed the fine wool collar against her cheek, remembering what it had been like to wake up with him in her bed.

"One moment," Lily called out.

She sat up, brushing her curls away. She had been up entirely too late last evening. After leaving Rafe at the boathouse, she sat outside for a time, studying the stars. It was an amazingly clear night. Without her telescope, she couldn't do much work.

Not that she could have focused if she had.

Lily jumped out of bed and grabbed the wrapper Mrs. Davies had lent her the evening before, then shrugged off his jacket. She didn' t know where to stash it, so she threw it under the covers and quickly made her bed.

She opened the door and smiled. "Good morning."

"I've news," Mrs. Davies said, and she clasped her hands together. "Your things have been returned." She stepped out of the way, revealing Lily's trunk and bag stacked along the small hallway wall.

Thank goodness.

Lily felt her shoulders drop for the first time in days.

"The constable paid a call early this morning and dropped off your belongings with Rafe."

Finn ambled down the hallway, pushing past Mrs. Davies and bumping against Lily's thigh in a big furry hello.

Relief washed over her. "I am very glad to hear that." Lily quickly glanced behind her, trying to gain her bearings. She had slept so hard. "This morning?" she asked. "What time is it?"

"Oh, it's almost eleven, dear."

"I apologize. I never meant to sleep the day away."

"No, no. You must be exhausted from the journey. There is no need to worry. When you are ready, I have fresh scones and tea. Mari and I are watching Rafe."

"Watching?"

Mrs. Davies nodded, her eyes bright. "He took out the sailboat this morning and is sailing out in the harbor. Mari is delighted. We haven't seen him sail in years."

Lily's stomach dropped. The stubborn man would only injure himself more. "I am looking forward to watching."

She dressed, grumbling as she opened her trunk to discover her clothes riffled through. Nothing had been stolen at least. But her telescope hadn't been with the rest of her belongings. And that was the one thing she could never replace.

Lily quickly pinned up her curls and greeted Finn, who waited outside her door. The small cottage was quiet as she made her way to the kitchen. A cup of tea and a scone were set out for her, as well as something else tied with a bow.

Her telescope .

She gasped, scanning the room for anyone, but she was alone. She pulled the telescope close to her chest and began to sob, so happy to hold it once more. Hers. It was the one possession she had in this world, and without it, she was lost. A small note that had been tucked in with the ribbon fell, fluttering down to land at her feet.

She bent down and unfolded the short missive, smiling as his words filled her heart.

Mari walked in through the kitchen door and waved, bending down to grab the cat before returning outside. Mrs. Davies stood on the cliffside overlooking the beach and gestured for Lily to join her.

"Has everything been returned then?" Mrs. Davies asked once Lily stood beside her.

She clutched the warm tea in her hand, a small smile playing at her lips. "Everything."

And more.

He presently was sailing around the harbor as if afraid to head out to sea, but even from high above, she saw he wanted to. She could feel it.

"I never thought I'd see him sailing that boat again after the accident." Rafe's mother opened a parasol and reclined back into a chair, motioning for Lily to join her. "But there he is."

"He's quite good."

"As was his father. Rafe wished to be a shipbuilder from the moment he learned his father was a naval captain. But the future holds many surprises, and he left us at eleven to be an apprentice on the HMS Hopkington with his father's friend, Captain Michael Ackerman."

Lily waited, desperate to discover some truth that might unlock him for her. But Mrs. Davies never finished her thought.

"He was convinced I hated him for what happened with Mari, but that's a child never understanding the depths of a mother's love. He believed I had lost her after that day, but I lost him, and I'm not sure he's realized that yet. I'm thankful that Henry had the sense to have the sailboat salvaged and restored for him. Rafe without the sea is a man robbed of his heart."

"I can see that now. "

"Rafe and Henry love one another, but it seems they both wish to put more effort into making the other believe it is hate. Henry might be hard on his brother but not half as hard as Rafe is on himself."

"Pride," Lily said quietly. "They both seem so proud."

Mrs. Davies chuckled. "Oh yes, men and their pride, dear. You will discover soon enough when you are married."

Lily froze. For the first time, she felt as if she would be sick.

"Henry will make a good husband. I'm not surprised he placed an advertisement. He is practical like that. He will see you safe and that you have everything you need for housekeeping. You will not want for anything."

Besides love , she thought to herself.

Lily might learn to love Henry, but she was afraid that her heart belonged now with that sailboat cutting through the dark water below.

When she had answered the advertisement, she had done so seeking stability. She needed that to continue with her work.

"Thank you for bringing him back to me and Mari, even if it's only for a short while. He seems as if he is finding peace. And I suspect that may be because of you."

Lily shook her head, chuckling to herself. "I assure you that I may have only brought about chaos."

"But he looks at you… well, when I first met you, forgive me for saying so, but I was certain you were his wife. He looks at you as if you are his world. I am still waiting for this to be another one of his jokes where I find out you two are married."

Lily focused on the sailboat, shaking her head. She could bring herself to lie outwardly to Mrs. Davies, but denying it would not change the fact that Lily wished Rafe was the man she was marrying.

Lily pulled down the brim of her straw bonnet and laughed. Mari waddled with the runner ducks along a tall garden gate as they approached the center of the village. Deep pink roses tumbled over the stone wall, and chamomile and lavender swayed in the warm sea breeze.

She was certain she hadn't smelled anything so lovely in her life, except for Rafe's jacket she had slept in only hours earlier. That, too, smelled of the sea.

"Come along, Mari," Mrs. Davies called out. The older woman grabbed the basket by her feet and smiled at Lily. "We'll need to go to the bakery and make sure you try the honey cakes."

"And we need scones for Rafe. Strawberry is his favorite," Mari called out over her shoulder. She stretched her arms out to her sides and balanced, walking toe to heel to toe as if on a tightrope.

"There's no rush. He'll likely be out sailing all day," Mrs. Davies said. "Now that he is reunited with that sailboat, I don't suspect he'll be wanting to hang around the house much. But I hope I can keep him for one more day." She winked at Lily who flashed a friendly smile.

She had been terrified of stepping out of the carriage when they first arrived, but Rafe had been correct about one thing—Gwen Davies was in fact a saint of a woman.

They crossed a stone bridge to a narrow alley sandwiched between two stone buildings. Once through, the village center emerged with a fountain and cobblestones. In the distance, tucked up high in the emerald rolling hills, stood a castle.

Mari caught Lily staring at it and nudged her elbow against Lily's side. "Henry told me dragons lived there. Do you think?"

"Have you visited?" Lily asked. It wasn't a far stretch, but she never did live in a world full of fantastic tales. Her world had been much smaller unless the sun set, and the stars emerged in the sky. Then, anything was possible.

"I wouldn't want to find out. Would you go with me?"

Lily narrowed her eyes, puzzling over how Rafe could be so afraid to return home when he had a family who loved him unconditionally. But then again, she supposed guilt complicated things. She hoped, if nothing else, this trip brought him peace.

"I've never searched for dragons before on land. But I can show you one tonight made of stars. His name is Draco. "

Mari shrugged, then bent down to pet the small wire-haired terrier that scampered out of the bakery. The dog yipped excitedly as she scratched between his ears. She had artist's hands, charcoal staining her left fingers, and a spot of Pomona green oil paint stained her right index knuckle.

"You two can go ahead," Mrs. Davies said. She pointed to the grocer. "I need a few items. Show Miss Abrams around, Mari."

Lily caught the curious stares and did her best to ignore them, but that didn't deter the nervous fluttering in her stomach.

As Mari stood, she looped her arms through Lily's elbow and leaned in to whisper, "I have pin money. Let's find some new ribbon." The sunlight struck Mari's chocolate brown hair, and it flashed with gold.

It had been some time since Lily went to buy ribbons. Her stepmother often took her sisters, but she had always avoided the trip if she could. Her stepmother had far too many opinions to make Lily feel comfortable.

"I'll be happy to find a new ribbon."

"Splendid because I wasn't asking."

Lily laughed, glancing over at her companion, who strode through the center of the village with such a strong, unaffected air. She was a little jealous to be honest.

"Now you sound like your brother."

"Oh, not Henry. He's a dreadful bore."

"No, not Henry. Though I hope that's not true." A seagull circled above in the sky, then swooped down and landed by the small fountain in the center of the village.

"I don't know many people, Lily, but I like you. Henry though, sad to say, is the most boring of bores. He made me eat turnips, and I despise turnips. It's a wicked vegetable that should be banished."

Again, Lily snickered. "I'm not sure I love turnips, either."

A bell overhead rang as they stepped inside the small haberdashery. The worn, wide pine floors creaked beneath her walking boots.

"See? We're destined to be great friends, you and I. Rafe adores you more than his sailboat that he built with father. "

Lily froze, clutching a rose silk ribbon between her fingers. She glanced at the shopkeeper, who busied himself behind the counter, then toward a small group of women who were admiring a new bonnet on display. Her cheeks warmed, first out of embarrassment, then because she remembered swimming with him only last evening.

And how he looked under the moonlight, and the way his hands had braced the small of her back as they kissed.

"And what's Rafe's opinion on turnips?" she asked, eager to change the topic, though she was inclined to agree about Rafe's adoration, which was the problem. How could she marry Henry when Rafe was suddenly such an unknown in her life?

Mari leaned over, clutching a light blue ribbon the color of a robin's egg. "Oh, he detests them, as any good person should. I'm going to buy this one."

She hurried to the shopkeeper to pay, then gestured toward the door. Lily followed, leaving behind the rose ribbon. Ribbon would be nice, but an idea had struck her the evening before in the boathouse that would likely require more coin than she possessed at the moment.

"Can you bring me to the docks, Mari?" Lily brushed aside the curls dancing by her cheeks.

Mari raised her eyebrows, slipping her new ribbon into her reticule. "Rafe will take you sailing, silly goose. Mama said he will be visiting us again soon. He's in Brazil. You should come with Henry, so we can all have a picnic at the beach when he returns."

Lily bit her tongue, suddenly realizing the weight of the guilt consuming Rafe.

"A picnic sounds lovely."

But first, she needed to find a seafarer who would sail Rafe's sailboat to the Isle of Wight, where perhaps he would and could enjoy it. It broke her heart to think of him leaving it behind for the sake of everyone else.

Which led her to only one inconvenient truth—she was in much too deep.

Later that afternoon, armed with a full picnic basket, Lily ventured down to the beach with Finn and waited for Rafe to return. She held her hand up to protect her eyes from the sun and watched as the sailboat became larger on approach. And all the while, her eyes were trained on Rafe, who waved at her.

Heady excitement coursed through her as soon as she spotted him. It was foolish to admit as much, but she had missed him and wished to thank him for seeing their luggage returned.

And she desperately missed him…

She jumped up to the dock and waited as the water sloshed against moorings. The sky was the bluest she had ever seen. A perfect summer day.

"Grab this line," he said, tossing her a rope. "And slip it over that mooring there."

The rope was heavy and rough in her hands.

He ducked under the boom and stood, perfectly sun-kissed as he reached his hand out for hers. "Can I take you sailing?"

She clutched the picnic basket tight, running her stare down the length of his chest and the bruises that shadowed his skin, down farther to the dark trail of hair that disappeared beneath his waistband as his shirt hung open.

For a moment, maybe longer, she stood there smiling, unable to find the words she wished to say as desire rioted around inside of her. "My telescope has been returned. Thank you."

He dropped his hand, his hazel eyes squinting into the sun. "You're welcome."

She looked up toward the cottage, weary of watchful eyes. "Are you afraid?" she asked, glancing back at him.

Afraid because she knew, once she stepped on Rafe's sailboat, it would not be only a kiss between them or several. Knew it was not a flirtation or some innocent exploration of her desires.

"Terrified." His voice was low and hungry.

His hand wrapped around hers and pulled her up into the sailboat. The world tilted, and she stretched out her arms to balance herself, only falling instead against Rafe.

"Sorry."

"I'm not."

She swatted him away, smiling when she turned.

"I am, actually. Sorry, that is. I believe I was a cad again last… well, all of yesterday."

Lily crossed her arms and nodded. "The telescope helps."

"Every now and again, I am surprisingly decent."

"Rafe, you are always decent. It's only that you don't believe that you are, which is the trouble."

He shrugged. "Don't make this about me, love. Come here, and help me for a moment, and I'll take you to see the Welsh coast before the sun sets."

"I enjoyed watching you sail today," his mother said, strolling into the kitchen later that night.

He glanced back over his shoulder from the open doorway. "I was surprised when I walked into the boathouse."

His mother put on the kettle and then picked up the cat crying at her feet. She nuzzled him, and he bumped his forehead against her cheek with a happy purr.

"I knew you needed to be away for a bit. I knew you would come back."

He twisted, resting his back against the door jamb. He loved this cottage by the sea. He loved the memories of running along the cliffside as a small boy waiting for his father. When his father died, he remembered watching the horizon each night when his little heart couldn't wrap itself up in its grief. But his father never returned, in spite of his wishes, and soon he was at sea himself, forever away from home.

"I am starting to believe I have had enough, Ma."

She nodded. "Our hearts have a habit of taking as much time as they need. Wishing them better makes no difference."

Thirteen years might as well have been an eternity. He had fled and left his mother and Mari, and he had sailed away and pushed his body well past exhaustion for years before he started drinking. Thirteen years was far too long a time to spend thoroughly hating yourself.

He was exhausted. And he was ready to return home, to them both.

"I am so sorry about that afternoon," he said, his voice cracking. "I truly am."

With a soft whoosh, Rafe exhaled, releasing the knot that had been lodged in his chest since that day. He had written his apology time and again, but somehow saying it to his mother here in her kitchen felt more real than it ever had.

"I know that. And in her own way, so does Mari."

"I did some foolish things in London before Henry was informed of father's cousin passing. I thought traveling with him would help, but there is nothing on that island for me."

"My boy." She walked up and placed her hand on his cheek, tears in her eyes. "You were not made for islands or for being tied to a city that has no care for you. You are something much more special. Your heart has always been tied to exploring that horizon there."

"You are saying that because you are my mother."

"Perhaps. And I am also saying as your mother that you do not belong in Henry's love life."

"I thought it would be funny to place a marriage advertisement. We were in another pointless tiff, and I thought he needed a wife to occupy his time instead of always fussing over me."

"That is for him to decide."

"So, he told me."

"And still you went through with the plan and wrote Miss Abrams?"

"I couldn't allow her letter go unanswered. It… intrigued me."

"So now you are bringing her home to your brother, and he is still unaware you have found a bride for him? "

Rafe squinted his eyes, snapping his attention to his mother as she shoved the cat in his arms and shuffled to the stove to take off the kettle.

"It is not for me to meddle between you two, but I will warn you of this. You will break her heart if you continue on with this foolish plan. And I dare venture"—she grabbed her cup of tea and turned toward the hall—"yours as well."

"Goodnight, Mother," he said mostly to himself.

He set the cat down and turned his attention back toward Lily, who was gazing through her telescope and taking notes.

She lived for the stars as much as he lived for the sea, and he couldn't look away as the fireflies darted in the long grass. The sweet fragrance of the moonflowers by the door flooded his senses. He longed for a good cigar.

He longed to touch her more.

And to kiss her.

That's all he could think of when they were sailing earlier. The wind had tossed her hair about, and that beautiful full smile of hers was nearly as bright as the late June sun. She hadn't sat by either but asked for him to teach her to sail, so he had.

They had spent hours out on the ocean together before the sun dropped heavy and orange in the sky, and it was time to return for dinner.

And he still wished to kiss her.

"Are you ever going to come outside?" she called to him at last. "Or do you plan only on keeping watch?"

He laughed in spite of himself. He would miss her when he left.

And he had to leave.

But until then, they could share what little they could, right?

Was it wrong to kiss?

It was only going to be one, but what happens when one kiss is not enough?

That way led to trouble. But he gathered he had heaped it upon himself the moment he had read her letter.

She needed a husband, but he could never be that for her. Especially when Henry didn't have a wife. He would only disappoint Lily. She needed a stable, honest husband.

He knew he should have said goodnight and left, knew as he stepped out of the cottage and walked toward her, knew it as he approached, and she looked up from the telescope and flashed a smile in his direction that made him forget his name.

Trouble.

"Are you looking for something?" he asked, stopping short of touching her.

"Aren't we all?"

"I suppose. I mean in that…" He pointed toward the telescope.

"Oh, yes, I'm looking for… oh wait, do you truly wish to know? I don't want to bore you."

"You never bore me, Lily."

"You say that now, but given enough time…"

He sighed, then chuckled. "What are you studying up in the sky this evening?"

"Well, it was documented in England's star catalog that several stars were part of a constellation. But they were marked incorrectly. I am sure of it. I've been charting them over the past several months to cross reference them before I write a letter to the Royal Society."

"Can I see?"

"Of course." She stepped aside, waving her arm for him to move forward.

She was… gorgeous.

And perfect.

And utterly brilliant.

Whether she believed him or not, he could listen to her talk about the stars forever.

He gazed into the telescope, scanning the night sky. It was remarkable. He navigated ships by these same stars for years, but he never knew they would lead him to Lily.

"If you look to the right," Lily said, her voice a warm whisper by his ear, "that's the cluster of stars. A few were never documented and others charted incorrectly. "

Rafe turned his head to meet her brown eyes gazing at him in anticipation.

"You love the stars, Lily. I love that about you."

Even in the pale light of the full moon, he saw the flush gather on her cheeks.

"People fall in love with the stars, but they're foolish to do so. It's thought that they're dead, you see. Astronomers have noticed stars are fickle. Some fade, and others suddenly shine bright. That's because they think what we see from Earth is a memory of light. And we fall in love with that, with a memory. As if our hearts need the extra burden of being tricked by the heavens as well as in love."

He stood back and studied her for a moment, twiddling a blade of grass between his thumb and forefinger. "I think you're wrong."

"I assure you I am not. What we see?—"

"If that is true, and those celestial bodies do die, they still guide us home. They are beacons. And memories, whether good or bad, can do the same."

"Like how you returned home?"

"Good or bad, Lily. I am here to?—"

"Fetch your grandmother's ring, so I have heard."

Again, he chuckled.

"It's not as if I can forget. You continue to remind me. Better to be off and on your way…"

He stepped closer, dropping his head down so she could hear, and only she could hear what he was about to say.

"I am reminding myself because, when I am with you, I feel as if I will forget why we are on this journey. That I don't wish to bring you to my brother's estate any longer. I wish for you to be mine, and mine only."

"And yet you only say so."

He didn't miss the tremble in her voice.

"What do you want, Lily?"

She pushed him aside, or so he thought, but her hand remained on his chest, and her fingers curled into his shirt, keeping him close.

"I wish to be wanted. Truly. I wish to be loved, for me, as I am. I wish to be allowed to live my life without being used for another's gain."

"But I do want you."

"Only until we reach the island, right?"

"Lily?"

She refused to look up at him.

"Let's take a walk on the beach."

Lily pulled away. "But I'm looking at the stars, I…"

He shook his head and backed away toward the path down the cliffside. He wasn't about to kiss her for his family to see, but he wished to kiss her thoroughly and well. He was finished acting the gentleman. He was never good at that role, anyhow. She would hate him soon enough if he confessed the truth.

Rafe waited for her at the bottom of the steps. He kicked off his boots and rolled up the cuffs of his trousers. It was glorious to have his feet in the sand once more.

Lily slowly descended the steps, her gaze fixed firmly on her feet. She had let her hair down, and in the moonlight, it made him nearly feral. She might as well have been made of the heavens, for she looked just as lovely and just as out of reach.

He grabbed her hand and pressed a courtly kiss on the top. Just a soft press of his lips against her soft skin, but it made his chest ache all the same.

"Really, Rafe, what are we doing?"

He had no earthly idea to be honest. That was the very devil of it. Something within him could no longer untangle himself from her. Maybe it was the full moon. Maybe he didn't wish to say goodnight to her just yet.

Maybe it was simply that he wished to hear his very favorite sound in the world—her laugh.

"Sit down, please."

Lily narrowed her eyes and lifted her nose playfully before sitting down on the bottom step. Tall grass waved back and forth as a soft breeze swept over the beach. Lily reached out and ran her fingers over the dancing blades, mesmerized .

He loved the way she moved through each day full of wonder. How she never stopped asking questions.

He sank to his knees and reached for her feet. She made a soft noise in the back of her throat as he lifted the hem of her dress and reached for her right foot. His hands skirted up the back of her soft calf before he removed her slipper, then slowly the next.

What he would do if he could lay her back here by the dunes, push up her skirts, and taste her.

"Rafe?" she whispered.

He stood, holding out his hand for hers once again and pulled her up to join him.

"Are you going to talk?" she asked, backing away from him. "Or do you plan on being broody and mysterious for the rest of the evening? I have important business to see to."

She spun and dashed around him.

He sprinted after her, and the two chased each other into the surf. She reached down and splashed him. He did the same until their clothes were damp and the air in his lungs burned.

And he only wanted her. Here, on this beach, dancing under the stars.

"I am quite excellent at broody," he mumbled as soon as they stopped to catch their breath.

"No, no you are not." She laughed again.

He couldn't stop himself; he laughed as well. He didn't recognize the big booming sound reverberating throughout his chest, shaking him awake. This is what it felt to be alive. He hadn't realized until now how numb he had been to it all.

"Come here and kiss me, love," he said, his voice a low rumble.

"Kiss you?" Lily pursed her lips and looked upward. "But I might miss a comet."

"Make a wish then, first."

"I wouldn't know where to start."

"Then start with me."

She sighed, throwing her hands down to her sides. "You make it so difficult, Rafe. Do you know that? "

"Hmm?"

"I wish I could hate you. I wish I couldn't stand the sight of you, but I can't help but…"

He licked his lips, waiting.

"I think, that is… I have never experienced this before. There is this feeling within me, like this warm buzzing, and it consumes me whenever you are around or when I think of you."

"Do you think of me often?"

She reached for his half-untied cravat and pulled him close. "Only every other minute. It's quite unfortunate."

"Sounds terrible."

"Oh, it's horrible. I am sure that I am losing my mind."

"But it's such a lovely mind. It would be a grave loss to science."

Lily laughed, then blinked hard, puzzling over what he had just said.

"I don't believe anyone has ever said something like that to me before. You keep doing that. Keep surprising me. You are not what I had planned on."

When he had started this whole scheme, he only thought to aggravate Henry, to push and prod until his brother finally snapped and told him to leave. But his brother hadn't. And instead, Rafe had done the right thing and replied to each letter, apologizing, all except for Lily's. He couldn't turn her away. Her letter had been… special.

Rafe knew Lily was what Henry needed in life—someone who could bring in the sunshine, someone who would stand by him and do what was expected.

But that's where the plan went wrong.

Because Lily needed to do anything other than what was expected. She had spent far too much time doing that already, and he couldn't stand to see her dreams crushed.

"You're thinking too much." She pushed up onto her feet and kissed him until, for a moment, everything made sense.

They made sense.

And that voice in the back of his mind telling him to leave quieted.

Lily paced her room, tapping her fingers over the spine of her book. She couldn't quiet her mind, couldn't relax her body since playing in the surf with Rafe like some lovesick fool.

Which was unfortunate since she was beginning to suspect she was a lovesick fool for Rafe Davies.

That damn crooked smile of his.

She flopped back onto the bed with a groan.

It was well past two in the morning, and she needed sleep. Tomorrow, they would leave to continue on to Cliffstone.

She sat up and pulled the dressing gown tightly around her, then poked her head out of her room. It was quiet. Lily crept down the hallway, past the kitchen and a sleeping Finn, and pushed open the door to the small library.

Then froze.

Rafe sat on the floor with a glass of brandy in one hand and a ring box in the other. He flipped it open and snapped it shut, over and again as if he were lost in thought. If he noticed her close the door and approach, he made no mention of it.

She slowly sank down to the floor and removed the brandy from his hand and then emptied the glass herself.

He turned to watch her, puzzled.

When she finished, she leaned her head against his shoulder.

"Can I see?" she asked.

"Hmm."

He opened the small ring box to reveal a gold ring set with three small emeralds flanked by two smaller diamonds.

She had never seen anything so beautiful before. She reached for it, afraid to touch the sparkling stones.

"My grandfather had the ring made for my grandmother. He owned a merchant shipping company. My mother said he was heartbroken when she married a navy man. He had his eyes set on a richer match for her. "

"Expectations when it comes to love rarely ever play out as they should."

"See if it fits."

"No, that might be bad luck. I haven't even met the groom."

He plucked the ring out of the box and motioned for her hand. She rolled her eyes and stuck it out, a girlish smile playing at her lips.

His hands were warm against hers, rougher. She loved that, that she could feel him move across her body.

Rafe slid the ring down her ring finger and waited for a beat before pulling her hand up to his mouth for a kiss just as he had on the beach. She felt herself blush, meeting his heated stare.

It was a beautiful ring.

Then he turned her wrist and kissed her palm with a warm, soft press of his lips. She felt herself melt back against the floor.

He gazed down at her as he bracketed her with his strong arms. His shirt was undone, his black hair tousled with curls from the salt air. And in the dim candlelight of the library, she could almost fool herself into thinking this was how they could spend every night together.

He bent down and sipped on her lips. She could taste the brandy and salt water on his skin. His jaw was rough beneath her touch as she reached up and placed her palms against his cheeks.

Rafe rested his forehead against hers. "Lily."

"Not now, Rafe. Don't you dare stop tonight."

He peppered kisses down her cheek, then whispered against her ear, "All right, love."

She craved his touch and was hungry for it. She couldn't get him out of her mind. She ran her hand up through his hair at the nape of his neck before he moved to kissing her neck.

Lily might have studied the stars, but until now, she hadn't discovered heaven.

His hands moved lower, cupping her breast through the thin dressing gown.

"You can tell me when to stop. Tell me when." He moved his body over hers, pushing aside her dressing gown and kissing the bruise on her collarbone.

"You are so soft," he whispered against his skin. "So perfect."

His thumb brushed against her nipple, and her body tightened as if he were winding her up. More. She always wanted more with Rafe.

Her heart drummed in her chest as she drew in another breath, struggling to remain quiet.

He moved lower still, then reached for the hem of her nightgown and pulled it up. His hand was rough against her inner thigh.

She froze.

"I can stop. I will if you ask me to, love."

Lily didn't want to. Hadn't wanted to ever stop with Rafe. Which was the problem. He did something to her she didn't understand. Made her body warm and filled with an impossible want.

She shook her head, closing her eyes for a moment.

"Look at me, I need to see your eyes, Lily."

She did, falling deeper into his hazel eyes. They might as well have been the ocean themselves because she barely ever understood their depth.

"I am going to touch you here." He drew his hand upward, brushing over the curls of her quim in the lightest of touches.

She nodded, her heart racing.

"Do you ever touch yourself here?"

She clamped her eyes shut and nodded once again, too distracted to speak.

"Good girl," he whispered. His fingers parted her folds, and he began rubbing gentle circles over her pearl before bending down and sucking on her breast.

She bucked against him, grabbing on to his shirt. But it wasn't enough. She needed to touch him, feel him.

He slowly drew circles over her pearl, spinning her apart, setting her body on fire.

Rafe slid a finger inside of her, and she moaned.

"Do you like that, love? Do you love when I touch you there, when I'm inside you? "

"Yes."

"I can't stop thinking of you. I can't…" He moved lower again, pushing up her nightgown. He settled between her legs, then he dropped a kiss on her mound. "I've dreamt of tasting you."

She watched, holding a breath as he moved his head, parted her folds, and licked her.

Lily moaned again. A sound she had never heard herself make before until now. Desire burned through her as he moved his tongue over her and slowly slipped another finger inside.

She pushed up onto her elbows to look down at him, to watch him taste her, and it was the most erotic sight she had ever seen. She ran her hand through his hair and gently pulled before falling back against the floor.

Rafe groaned.

"Shh, love."

"Rafe, I think…"

Everything tightened in her body, tightened, then she was climbing, climbing toward her own pleasure. He was undoing her, and she never wanted it to end. But that was a mistake because suddenly her body burst into flame, and she climbed higher still before pleasure washed over her, and her body shook under Rafe's touch.

They both stilled, catching their breaths in the aftermath.

Rafe slowly untangled from her and sat up.

Some small part of her filled with panic, believing he would leave.

Instead, he drew her onto his lap.

She felt his own need press against her. She ran her hand over him, and he hissed.

"Not tonight, love. Not…" He stopped, laughing in spite of himself. "You tasted amazing."

Lily's heart still hammered in her chest, even as her limbs grew heavy, and suddenly she only wished to sleep. She hated having to leave and sleep alone in her bed. But she must.

She kissed his jaw, running her hands back into his hair. She was quite certain she could kiss him for hours. But now they had moved on from kissing, and she craved to know what else lay ahead of a man and woman when they coupled. And she wished only for Rafe to teach her.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"You deserve to know what pleasure is, Lily. That is how a man should treat you. He should worship you."

"Worship me? That may be lovely for some, but no, I want someone to love me. Can you do that?"

He gazed down at her for a moment, his eyes burning. She felt his erection press against her hip.

Instead of answering, he bent down and kissed her for some time, but it was confession enough.

And she knew.