Chapter 13

Carter

I'm an idiot. I knew her mom died when she was a baby. I knew everything I could about her. I'd researched her online as soon as I found out that she was going to be a patient. I was curious, and now she thought I was insensitive. I could see it all over her face. I couldn't tell her the truth because then I'd sound like a stalker, but now she thought I was stupid.

I pulled into a parking space, and cut the engine. I could feel the tension in the car, and I hated it. Today was supposed to be fun and light, and I'd done nothing but make it heavy. Why did I have to bring up my mom?

I climbed out, and came around to open her door. When she climbed out, I smiled. "Food or fun?" I pointed to the gate.

"What?" She seemed confused.

"Do you want to eat first, or find the games and rides?" I clarified.

"Let's just walk around and see what's here. I haven't been here since I was little," she offered. "My dad and Madi used to bring here."

"Sounds like a plan." I led us to the gate and paid for our tickets. Ava frowned as we walked through the gate. "What's wrong?"

"I need to pay for my ticket." She was holding a ten-dollar bill in her hand.

"I got it." I shrugged.

"No, this isn't a date. You don't get to pay for me." She frowned as she slipped the money back into her pocket.

"You can buy me food then," I offered to help smooth over the situation. The truth was, I was hoping that today would turn into a date. This friends stuff that we'd been trying to do wasn't really working for me anymore. I hadn't told her that, though. I was afraid it would be all or nothing with her, and I couldn't risk her cutting off all contact. I didn't really understand any of it.

"Fine." She sighed.

"What? You might regret agreeing to this. I can put away quite a bit." I laughed as we rounded the end of a row of stalls. "Wanna try one of these?" I pointed at a game in which you had to knock down a tower of milk bottles with a softball.

"Sure." She shrugged. We stopped, and I paid again before she even noticed. The guy running the booth handed her three balls. "I was pretty good at this when I was little. Stand back, though. I don't want to hit you." She glanced my way, and once I shuffled back a few steps, she wound up and threw the ball. It hit the edge of the bottom of the tower, taking out all but one bottle.

"Almost." The guy went to reset the game. "You gotta make it curve when it hits the stack."

"Curve, huh?" She tossed the ball in the air, catching it one handed when it came back down. When he stepped out of the way, she turned slightly and threw again, this time clearing the table.

"Nice shot." I grinned from where I was standing.

"I'll take that polar bear." She pointed to a giant white bear slouched in the corner of the booth.

"Here ya go. Nice arm." The guy handed over the bear.

"Thanks." She hugged the bear and turned to face me. "That was fun."

"Have you ever played softball?" I asked as we walked away.

"No." She laughed. "I've always been good at throw-ins. It's kinda the same skills." She hugged the bear tighter as we made our way to the end of the aisle. The thing was almost as big as she was, which said a lot.

We spent the next hour checking out all the crafts before making our way into the food tent. It smelled of spices and baked goods. "I used to pretend I was at the North Pole when we'd come here when I was little. I always imagined it would smell like this when Santa had come back from his Christmas deliveries and was resting after the holiday." She smiled up at me. "Let's get some cider." She led me over to a small table where a lady was ladling cider into Styrofoam cups. Before I could say anything, she produced her money and paid for both of us. I laughed when she turned and stuck her tongue out at me as she handed me a cup.

"We're even," I chided back.

"Not even close." She lifted her chin as she pranced past me, sipping the hot liquid in the process. "Oh, we have to get some Kringle." She skipped over to another booth, pointing to a pastry that was covered in almonds and a glaze of sorts. The young woman smiled and laughed lightly as she placed two pieces on a plate for us.

"Even yet?" I chuckled.

"Nope." She grinned as she lifted a piece and took a bite.

"What is this?" It looked delicious, but I'd never tried it before.

"It's Kringle. How have you not had this?" Her eyes went wide. "It's a Danish pastry. Like a giant donut with sugar glaze. Some have nuts on them, others have a cheese or fruit filling. It's like dessert for breakfast." Her eyes closed when she took another bite.

I just watched her face, and tried really hard to keep my composure. Seeing the way she enjoyed this made me yearn to take her somewhere private and make sure that look on her face stayed there forever.

"Try it," she urged as she lifted the plate in my direction. I tore a piece off and took a bite. She was right, it was delicious, and as much as I liked it, I loved watching her eat it more.

"It's good, but you can have it." I tried to not sound insulting as I offered it all to her.

She gave me a weird look, but as she took another bite she brushed it away and enjoyed the pastry. "What's next?" She looked around as she licked the remaining sugar off her fingers.

"The snow." I grinned. This was something new they added this year. We never saw snow in this area, but this year we would.

"Snow?" Her nose crinkled.

"There's a snow tent this year." I pointed to a giant white tent in the far corner of the carnival. "Come on." I instinctively grabbed her hand and began leading us to the tent. "This way." I couldn't help it. I was excited about this.

When we got inside, it was noticeably colder. There were blowers blasting icy air out to keep the snow frozen. There was a machine in the corner creating a Winter Wonderland. One side had sculptures made of ice, the other was filled with kids having a snowball fight.

"Put the bear over there." I pointed to where other patrons had left belongings, and then I stomped out into the snow. "Hurry up." I grinned as I leaned down and began packing a snowball in my hands.

Ava

It was freezing in here. I rubbed my arms as I sat my bear against the edge of the tent. When I turned around, Carter was nowhere to be seen. I scanned the crowd of people, and then felt a cold wetness hit my back. I whirled around to find Carter waving at me. He leaned down and started frantically scooping snow into his hand. I shifted a little and then it came again. This time I was facing him, so he hit me in the chest. "Fight back!" he shouted as he went to work again.

"Oh, no you didn't." I rushed to match his movements. I was competitive, and he was bringing that side out. He didn't know what he was asking for. I squatted down and began to build my arsenal. When I looked up, he was gone.

I gathered my snowballs the best I could, and began walking around the area. "Come out, come out wherever you are," I singsonged. I heard him laugh as I rounded a corner. Just as I raised my arm to fling one at him, I got nailed in the shoulder. "Oh, you are dead meat," I growled as I unloaded. He laughed and ducked behind a mound of snow, and I took full advantage. I rushed over, and as he was standing to take aim again, I jumped on his back, causing him to lose his balance and tumble to the ground.

We lay in a pile of twisted limbs for a few moments just staring at each other. I was awkwardly draped across him, and laughing. His eyes twinkled as he looked up at me, and that's when I felt it… the change. Something was happening here and as much as my brain told me to stop it, my heart didn't want to.

"What are you going to do now?" he whispered as the world around me melted away. It was just us. The chaos of the children playing faded into the background, and all the things I'd told myself I shouldn't do seemed to be inconsequential at the moment. I couldn't look away, and as much as I wanted something to happen, I couldn't force myself to take action.

"You're really beautiful when you smile." His hand reached up and tucked a stray hair behind my ear. My eyes closed at the touch. Every part of me was alive and I felt as if it would all disappear if I moved. Danny never made me feel like this, and it was both amazing and terrifying at the same time. "Talk to me," he urged. "Tell me what you're feeling."

"Afraid." The word came out barely audible. "I don't want this to end." I swallowed. I was being more honest than I'd been in a long time. I was opening myself up to heartbreak, and I think he saw this.

"Don't be afraid of me," he whispered as he lifted his head and brushed his lips over mine. "I'm just a guy." His breath feathered across my cold cheeks as he laid his head back in the snow.

"That's what I'm afraid of." I leaned down and pressed my lips to his and surrendered to the feelings I'd been fighting for weeks. I couldn't do it anymore, and I just hoped that this wasn't a mistake, and he felt the same way I did.