Chapter 34

Chapter

Thirty-Four

PHOENIX

“Ani’s losing her mind,” I begin as Athena and I have just finished a meeting with our staff about moving from the Seattle penthouse. Ani is going to Spain, and me back to Olympus. They have their new orders, and I am confident all will run smoothly. I like the penthouse, but I’m uneasy, edgy, and my home is back at Olympus.

Ani is still asleep, exhausted from our fight last night, and I’m grateful to have a break from her pleading eyes. I have had a long talk with Athena, filling her in on everything. Even the murder. I know I can’t keep her in the dark about everything. My sister will figure it out eventually, and I need her on my side to help fight off my father and the toxic world of Godwin hell. I don’t want anyone knowing about Ani and the baby.

“We’ll move her soon,” Athena says. “I’m sure the walls are closing in on her.”

“It’s more than that.”

Athena pauses, looks deep into the screen at me to study my face.

“Don’t ask me how, but I think she’s falling in love with me,” I add.

Athena smirks and rolls her eyes. “I think you are losing your mind. Maybe the walls are closing in on you.”

“Athena…” I run my fingers through my hair and sigh. “You’re welcome to watch the video of our talk, but it wasn’t pretty.”

“Just tell me, and save me the time. ”

“She doesn’t want to leave me. She said so. She wants a life with me and the baby.”

Athena’s eyes widen. “Baby? Is she pregnant?” She shakes her head.

“No guarantees but a high chance.”

“Jesus Christ. I wouldn’t have guessed this in a million years.”

Baby. A baby… I can’t believe I’m even having a discussion about a baby. About my baby.

Jesus, is this all really happening? The plan all seemed good at the beginning, but now that reality is kicking in, a surge of panic hits me hard.

“But this isn’t about the baby. I really think she’s in love with me.”

Pushing back the thoughts of fatherhood to focus, I rise and pace the room, which often helps me process all my emotions.

“It’s probably just hormones,” Athena offers.

“No. It’s more. You didn’t talk to her. I did. She wants to stay with me. She doesn’t want to leave Seattle without me.”

“After what you just told me you did to her… That’s insane. She should hate your guts.”

I nod in agreement. “She should. She should want to fucking kill me.” I look Athena square on. “But she doesn’t. Far from it.”

Athena is right, however. The thought is insane. Ani in love? How could this be? I essentially kidnapped her. Made her fear for her freedom and her sister’s. Forced her into submission. Yes, it was clear she enjoyed much of the punishment, and her body came alive under my touch, but that was physical. How in the fuck could she be falling in love with me? How?

“It’s that Stockholm syndrome shit or something.” Athena nods as if she has just explained it all away. “I’m sure as soon as she’s out of your grip, she’ll want you dead and hate your very presence.”

I nod slowly, taking in her answer. “Possibly.”

“And it doesn’t matter really,” Athena adds as I sit down and study Ani in the monitor. The camera in our room is positioned on her and zoomed in perfectly.

God, she’s beautiful as she sleeps. So angelic. So perfect. So…

Athena’s words snap me out of my thoughts. “We continue as planned. If she’s pregnant, we move her to a location away from Medusa, Poseidon, and all our other enemies. I’ve been looking into a villa in Madrid that looks like we could compound the hell out of it. It would be a good setting for her to stay during her pregnancy and should make her happy. I think keeping her there for nine months will be an okay amount of time, but we’ll want to move her and the baby soon after. I don’t like the idea of her staying in one place for a year. Considering you want to keep this quiet from Dad… Well, it won’t be easy unless we keep her moving. Father is distracted with Medusa business, and you’ve never really been on his radar so—” She grimaces. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s true.” I shrug. I gave up hope a long time ago of ever having a close relationship with the powerful Troy Godwin.

“What about you? Are you ready to leave and return to Olympus?” Athena asks.

“Yeah, I am. I miss some of the comforts of the attic. Plus, I need to get back to the daily oversight of Medusa’s security. I think there are some cracks forming we need to get sealed up.”

“What about Ani? Are you ready to leave her?”

My stomach twists, and an inexplicable lump forms in the back of my throat. “The time together has been fun. I’m not going to deny that. The kinky sadist in me has been able to run free. There’s a physical connection, for sure, but it’s not like she’ll ever be out of my life. She’ll be carrying my baby. She’s in my life, one way or the other.”

“How often do you plan on seeing her in Spain?” Athena asks, but it’s a question she already knows the answer to.

Not often enough.

“I need to get back to my life. Full time. You know this,” I say.

Who am I trying to convince? Athena or myself?

Athena nods slowly. “But from what you are saying, it sounds like she wants to be part of that full-time life.”

“Which is crazy. In a goddamn attic?”

“You don’t need to choose the attic, Phoenix, and you know this.”

“And you know what being a Godwin does to people. What it did to Mother,” I say, to counter the idea of a happily ever after. “The last thing I want to see is Ani jumping to her death because she sealed her fate by marrying me. No one deserves that. No one.”

“Our mother was different.” Athena’s jaw tightens as she spits out the words. “She was weak. She didn’t have the strength to fight for our family.”

“How do you know Ani isn’t weak?”

Athena shrugs. “I don’t, but I think you know just how strong Ani is. Otherwise we wouldn’t even be having this conversation.”

“True,” I agree. “She’s not weak.”

“But even if you wanted this woman as your wife, there is no way to have that normal family where you come home at the end of the day to a homemade meal and family laughter like some suburban fantasy. It’s just not who you are. Who any of us are.”

“I don’t know. It sure as hell looks like Apollo and Daphne are about to live that perfect white picket fence dream,” I say.

Athena rolls her eyes. “Doubtful. But whatever. I couldn’t care less if they do.”

“Yeah, well… you are right. It’s not who I am. It’s not who I will ever be.” I release a deep breath and return my attention to Ani asleep on the monitor. “Ani may think she knows what she wants. But she has no idea.”

“Then stick to the plan.”

“Ani said there are journals of Mother’s at the house,” I say. “I’m having the staff search for them.”

“Why bother?” Athena shrugs.

“You aren’t curious what’s inside?”

“She’s dead. Dead. Let’s move on.”

Picking up on her tone, I do just that. “I’ll work on security in Madrid.” I like that I now have something to focus on other than Ani and her idea of an impossibility.

“Fine, but let me ask you something first. Be honest,” Athena says in a low voice. “Do you have feelings for Ani? Do you love her?”

I look back at the monitor, lean back in my chair, and fight the urge to study every single curve of Ani’s body, which I often do. “Yes.” I run my hands through my hair. “Fuck.”

Athena studies me and then says, “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”

“It makes things messy. Complicated. And if she’s carrying my baby, I think my feelings are only going to grow more for her.”

“Spain,” Athena says. “Distance. You need it. She needs it.”

“It’s the only way. I need to focus. Stay on course.”

I sit back and continue to watch Ani sleep peacefully as my mind tells my heart lies.

Stay on course.

Stay on course.