24. Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Four

Bennett

Trying to keep my eyes off of Shay was nearly impossible. Once the other guests had arrived and we'd eaten, we'd all naturally separated into groups. All the omegas were in a group near the far end of the pool, along with Gabe, who was good friends with most of the omegas present. The alphas, and Asher, were all near the shallow end and minding the kiddie pool. It was a nice surprise to see all the alphas watching all their kids, giving their omegas a well-deserved break.

The older kids, Matty, who was Jamie and Bash Sinclair's oldest, along with Lucas, and Rory and Patrick, were in the middle of the pool. Jamie Sinclair was in the middle of them, playing a rousing game of Marco Polo.

Finn Sinclair, who was my landlord, Wade's husband, had their two oldest kids, Logan and Remy, in the shallow end, watching over them. They both wore floaties on their arms and it was clear they were just in the beginning stages of learning how to swim. Though the older one seemed to know what he was doing and was keeping the younger one company, while Finn showed him how to paddle his arms.

Brendan Sinclair, Ryan's husband, had Finn and Wade's youngest daughter, Sammi, in the kiddie pool with Charlie, as well as another dark-haired boy I thought belonged to Jamie and Bash. Shay was keeping an eye on Lucas from where he stood quietly chatting with the other alphas and Asher.

Wade flopped down on a lounger next to Quinn, who nudged him with his elbow good-naturedly. "Are Becks and Wyatt coming today?"

"Becks is working until later," Bash's British accent was lovely, and I could sit here and listen to him all day. He was a quiet omega, with a sharp wit, and intelligent green eyes. He had a messy mop of dark curls and was just this side of being too skinny. I knew in shifted form he was a honey badger and was pretty bad ass. There had been some kind of trouble a few years ago at the Sinclair manor, and Bash had been involved, but I didn't know all the details. There was a rumor around town that he was an ex-British spy, but people loved to make up things, so I doubted it was true. He was a children's book author and seemed a little unassuming to have lived the exciting life of a spy.

Wade waved a hand in the air. "Wyatt could bring Julianna and come swimming, and Becks could show when he gets off work."

Ryan shook his head. "He was planning to, and then his dad Robert showed up unexpectedly." He seemed to pause for dramatic effect, wiggling his brows, "Without his alpha wife, and a couple of suitcases. "

"Ohhh," Wade shrieked, "please tell me Robert finally wised up and left that barracuda?"

"Robert is way too nice for that wife of his," Quinn agreed, "bit of an ice bucket, that one."

Ryan shrugged. "Can't say for sure what's going on, but I can tell you Wyatt was not expecting his dad to walk into the daycare yesterday, bags in tow."

Wade sat up, pointing a green glitter polished finger at Bash. "What do you know about the sitch? Did Becks give Jamie the 4-1-1?"

Bash had a sour look on his face. "Pardon, was any of that English?"

"All of it was," Wade assured him with a grin. "Now give us the deets."

Bash shook his mop of unruly hair. "I have no deets. No tea. No info. I know nothing." He shrugged, "But it would serve Robert well to have finally left Jane. That man is much too nice for that woman. And he does love visiting with his granddaughter."

Holding up a hand because I had been zoning out, I asked, "Okay, who is Robert, exactly?"

Seth yawned, stretching out on the lounger he was occupying, adjusting his sunglasses on his nose. He'd taken off his shirt and shorts to reveal a very skimpy hot pink bikini underneath, that I had to admit he wore well. The bright color was perfect for his golden tanned skin and dark hair. He adjusted the triangle top before replying. "Robert is Wyatt's omega dad."

I knew Wyatt owned the Little Cubs Daycare and was mated to Becks, the sheriff. But I didn't know the man personally. "Ah, okay, got it."

Ryan interjected, his voice soft. "Robert is really sweet, but Wyatt's mom is…not."

"She's a raging bitch, is what she is." Wade interjected, and Gabe rolled his eyes, admonishing, "Language. There are kids around."

"And they are all busy playing in the water, Teddy Bear," Wade gave him a wide-eyed look, waving his hand towards the pools. "Those kids would not care if we yelled ‘Fire' right now. Trust me."

Quinn flicked his friend on the back of his head with his finger and thumb, "Gabe's right, language."

"Oh, you're one to talk, Quinn," Wade shot back, "you probably already have the twin's college paid for with that swear jar Lachlan has for you."

"Anyway," Ryan continued, ignoring the two obviously close friends, "Robert showed up yesterday at the daycare, out of the blue, with his bags in tow. A lot of bags. I know Wyatt and Becks are planning to come later, when Becks's shift is over, for the fireworks. I'm guessing Robert will be with them, but who knows." Ryan shrugged. "He might stay home with the baby. I'm gonna text him in a bit."

"Text the chat so we can all see what he says," Wade instructed, not at all ashamed by his nosiness, and I took that opportunity to stand up.

"I need to pee," I told everyone, trying and failing, to not look Shay's way. Just like every other time I had casually glanced over to where he was standing, sipping on a beer, he was staring at me. Despite the hot sun beating down, I shivered slightly at the intensity of his blue gaze from across the yard.

"You can use the hall bath under the stairs," Gabe instructed, and I nodded as I headed inside. Finding the door built into the side of the stairs, I smiled at the little half bath that had been built there. It was cute and a great use of space, but not original to the house. Perks of being mated to a contractor, I imagined.

Washing my hands, I stared at myself in the mirror, trying to calm my racing pulse. Just being this close to Shay all afternoon, watching him from across the yard, feeling his eyes on me each time I looked his way, had my body aching for him. My hole was damp with slick, desire burned low in my belly, and I was growing hard just thinking about his hands on me. Touching my skin, his fingers skimming lightly over my hole, teasing. The taste of his kisses. The way he smelled.

Gripping the edge of the cool porcelain vanity tightly, I told myself to stop thinking about him. Stop thinking about his hands, and lips, and tongue, and that thick, mouth-watering cock of his. So what if the man looked good enough to eat in his black board shorts? His long-tanned body on full display. His face finally glowing with health and his bruises gone. All that skin, and muscles, and…yep, nope, not going there.

And then there was that bandage on his neck, that signified so much. He had taken the first steps to truly severing his mate claim with Edward. Mate bonds couldn't be dissolved without going through the sometimes long, and from what I had heard, very painful, process. It essentially amounted to having the other mate's saliva, and what would best be described as venom, dug out from your tissue. Thinking about the entire process made me squeamish.

But Shay was doing it. He was putting himself through it to erase and break anything that tied him together with Edward. He was truly taking steps to move on with his life. Not that I hadn't believed that he would, but I had worked with enough cases like Shay's to know that intentions and actions didn't always align. In many cases, victims often went back to their abusive partners.

Even knowing we were fated mates, knowing that Shay needed the time he had asked for, and understanding why he needed it, deep down there had still been a tiny part of me that didn't believe he wouldn't return to Edward. I hadn't acknowledged it, hadn't let it take root inside me, but the seeds were there, just waiting for the day to come.

According to the book on fated mates I had checked out from the library, being fated didn't mean we would automatically end up together. The Goddess had basically written an out clause, so couples didn't have to be tied together for a lifetime if they truly didn't fit. Though my reading also made it clear that if a couple was taking too long to make a connection, the Goddess was known to move things along on her own. I wasn't sure exactly what that meant, or what the time frame might be before the Goddess took fate into her hands.

One thing most of the firsthand accounts in the book did have in common was the majority of the couples hadn't fallen into what they would describe as ‘insta-love'. Many did, however, liken it to ‘insta-lust'. That I could definitely relate to. Even with Shay lying battered, bruised, and ill in a hospital bed, I had wanted him. My body had more than responded to his.

Honestly, I really thought I had been handling the whole Shay needing space and time well. But seeing him today, being this close to him all afternoon, all the feelings I had pushed down, ignored, and refused to acknowledge the past few weeks, slammed into me like a tidal wave of need and desire.

I really had fooled myself into thinking I would be able to handle being this close to Shay, and act like we were nothing more than friends. Less than friends, really, more like acquaintances. Acquaintances who had fucked like rabbits, and had the best sex of my entire life.

I was a fucking idiot.

"Why did you think coming here was a good idea, Bennett?" I asked my reflection, splashing cool water over my face and neck. "It will be fine. No biggie. We are both grown-ups. People break up all the time. You didn't even break up. You weren't really ever together. You had sex. A lot of sex, in a very short amount of time. And, yes, it was freaking good sex. The best sex you've ever had. Doesn't matter that you are fated, he's got hella issues he needs to deal with first. And I get it, I do. I understand. I heard what he was saying. And he did the right thing, made the right choice. Then why does it feel so fucking wrong?"

My reflection just stared back at me, offering no answers or being helpful in the slightest.

"And you," pulling my swim trunks away from my waist, I peered down at my half hard dick, "I really need you to go the fuck down. Shoo. Go away now. Nothing to be done for you until later. Much later. I have a dildo and my hand that have your name on it."

Exhaling sharply, I yanked the door open, running smack dab into a hard, toned chest. One that smelled of suntan lotion, chlorine, delicious musk and the earth after a rainstorm.

Shay.

Because, of course , he would be standing right outside the door, and had probably heard every embarrassing word of my out loud ramblings.

Cheeks burning crimson–dear Goddess, please don't let him have heard any of my ranting–I sidestepped, giving him room to enter the bathroom. "Sorry. I…sorry." Stammering, I slid past him. "It's all yours. "

Shay grabbed me lightly by the arm, sliding his hand down, until his fingers caressed my palm before they tangled with mine. Electricity and pure need from his touch raced wildly across my skin, making me hot and cold and shaky. "Bennett, wait. I wanted to talk to you. I need to talk to you."

Looking down at our entwined fingers, then up to his face, I shook my head. "I'm not sure that's a good idea. You need time, and I need…" My shoulders sagged in defeat, and I whispered, "I didn't think seeing you would be this hard. I thought I could handle it."

"Please," he pleaded, his eyes begging me, "just for a minute."

There was no way I could say no to him. No way I could deny him anything .

Nodding, I tightened my fingers around his, loving the warmth that shot up my arm. "Okay."

The kitchen door banged open, and voices drifted to us from the other room. Hurriedly, Shay pulled me into the tiny bathroom, shutting the door and locking it behind us. The room wasn't big; I doubted Gabe fit in here comfortably, and the ceiling above the toilet was slanted at an angle because of the stairs.

Shay banged his head on the slanted ceiling, winced, then switched places with me so that he was leaning against the sink. When the voices finally faded, I peered up at him through my lashes. "What did you want to say?"

He took a deep breath, and I wondered if being near me was as hard for him as it was for me. Our scents mingled together in the tiny space, until all I could smell was him and me. Desire flared in me so fast I gasped, reaching out to grasp his arms to steady myself. Shaking my cloudy head, I let go of him, trying to step back, even though there was barely any room to move .

"How's the job going?" my mouth blurted out randomly, before he had a chance to say whatever it was he wanted to say.

He blinked, before his mouth quirked up at the corners. "It's really good. It's only been a week, but Lo is a great boss. She's been really understanding of me needing to take time off for therapy. Or if Alex calls needing something. And I love getting my hands dirty working on an engine again."

Nodding, I looked down at our bare feet, our toes not quite touching. The swirl of the tile on the floor. Anywhere so that I wouldn't have to look into the bright blue of his eyes. Because Goddess, Shay had the prettiest eyes I had ever seen on anyone, and I could easily get lost in them. "That's good. I'm glad."

Shay reached out and tilted my chin up with one finger, forcing me to meet his gaze. "I don't want to talk about my job. I wanted to give you an update on the court case. Edward is causing a delay in it."

Blowing out a breath, I whispered, "How?"

Shay's eyes turned troubled. "Alex received word from Edward's lawyers–because of course, he has more than one–that he has checked into a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center."

"Oh, well…I mean, that has to be good, right? For him. To get help if he needs it."

Shay shrugged, "I guess. I mean, yes. I don't want to sound like a dick, because he does need help. But it's delaying everything by at least ninety days, the length of his program."

It dawned on me then exactly what he was trying to tell me. He didn't want to pursue anything with me until he had completely closed the book on Edward. And now that wasn't going to happen for much longer than he had anticipated.

"I'm sorry, Bennett," he ran a frustrated hand through his thick hair, mussing it more than it already was from his time in the pool. "Alpha Law is usually decided in thirty days or less, but now…the judge has agreed to postpone any hearings on anything until Edward finishes his rehab."

Brow furrowed, I asked, "What does that mean for Lucas? He stays with you, right?"

Years ago, it wouldn't have even been a question. The law had been written at a time when omegas had little to no rights. An alpha could declare Alpha Law for any reason, take his pups, and cut the omega completely out of their lives. The omegas could fight it, but seldom–if ever–won. But now, thankfully, things had changed. And while lawmakers were trying to get the law struck from the books, it was a slow process.

However, that didn't mean judges still stood by it without giving the omega a fair hearing. And I knew for a fact the family law judge in Sweet Alps often ruled in favor of the omega parent. He wanted to hear from both sides, and weighed the evidence accordingly, treating it much like a custody hearing.

Which was wonderful in most cases but could very well work against Shay. The law had at least allowed him to escape, but it didn't mean the judge wouldn't decide in Edward's favor and force him to hand Lucas over to his omega father. Hopefully the evidence against Edward would speak for itself on why that shouldn't happen.

Shay nodded. "Yes, nothing changes for now. But Edward getting clean and sober could give him a better chance at visitation. Though, I have no doubt that Edward isn't the one that will want to see Lucas, but his parents. I don't know how I feel about that, to be honest. Regardless, Alex feels the rehab was a strategic move for them to stall things. Not only the Alpha Law hearing, but the assault charges as well. We'll use the extra time to continue with my therapy, establish that I'm building a stable life here. Lucas will be in school then, and I'll…" he bit his lip, suddenly looking shy. "I hope to have my G.E.D by then. I'm studying every night, and well–" he smiled ruefully, "I might not be as dumb as I think I am. Except maybe when it comes to my questionable life choices."

The implication of his words slammed into me, and I realized what Shay was admitting. He hadn't graduated high school. That had to be something that weighed heavily on him. And the fact that he had admitted he felt he wasn't that smart told me so many things. All of that made me want to wrap him in the biggest hug, and tell him how strong, smart, and beautiful I thought he was, on top of being an amazing father.

Because I couldn't not touch him any longer, I reached up to gently caress his cheek. With him standing in front of me, just the two of us, I had to touch him. The rest of the world was blocked out in this tiny room, forgotten, and it was just us. With barely an inch of space separating us, his body heat warmed me.

Turning his face into my palm, he closed his eyes, breathing in the scent of my skin.

"Oh Shay, having a diploma doesn't mean anything. It's just a piece of paper. You made some choices, and you didn't graduate, but that has nothing to do with being smart or not."

He shrugged, not meeting my eyes. "I just wanted you to know that things are taking longer than I expected. And," he swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing, "I don't expect you to wait for me to get my shit together. I know my life is a mess, and it might be for a very long time."

Were we back to that again? "I…"

Well, what did I say to that? If I said I couldn't imagine living my life with anyone but him–and Lucas–he would probably look at me like I was crazy and run for the hills. He had just left a long, unstable relationship.

Did I tell him I felt like he was my future, that I had felt that way since the first time I had laid eyes on him, and that I would wait forever for him? Because that just sounded desperate as fuck, and slightly stalkerish.

"I'm still not ready for…whatever this thing is between us," he continued, his eyes downcast. "I'm sorry. I feel like an asshole saying that. But I'm really trying to–"

Putting a finger over his lips, I whispered, "Stop talking."

Eyes wide, he stared at me, looking sad and scared. He opened his mouth, but before he could say one more word, I firmly repeated, "Stop talking, Shay. I'm going to talk now, and you're going to shut the fuck up."

Well, that was a bit harsher than I intended, but it got my point across.

Nodding slowly in understanding, eyes wide, he remained silent.

"I get that you aren't ready. I understand, I really do. I think, more than anyone, I can see how much you have on your shoulders, how much you are dealing with. Even now, I can tell you are stronger than you were just a couple of weeks ago. And I don't think it's a great idea when people…victims of abuse…" I wasn't sure how he was going to take me saying that out loud, labeling him, but it was what he was.

He whispered, "Survivor. I'm a survivor. Tessa is making me see that I'm not a victim but a survivor."

Smiling softly, I nodded, "She's absolutely right. You are a survivor, and I won't refer to you as a victim any longer."

He shrugged his broad shoulders, like it didn't matter one way or the other, but the fact that he had corrected me said so much. That he had said the words I knew had to be hard for him to admit to and label himself with, it meant something to him. And it should be something he was proud of. I never wanted to diminish that for him.

"I don't think it's a great idea for people coming out of abusive relationships to jump immediately into another relationship. It usually doesn't end well. I admire you for admitting, and voicing, that you aren't ready. That you need to put you and Lucas first. It shows just how smart and strong you are, Shay. But I'm not going to stand here and tell you this–any of this–is easy for me. Because it's hard as fuck. My head gets it." I tapped the side of my head with a finger. "My head understands it completely and is on board. But this," my hand slid over my chest, over my heart, "this hurts. This is not happy about any of this. This is not on board, and my head and my heart? They are at war with each other. I thought today would be easy. I thought I could handle it. But seeing Lucas, seeing you, not being able to touch you…it's killing me."

Shay's blue eyes flared with heat, and I swore the temperature in the room shot up ten degrees. Both his hands cupped the sides of my face, in a move that always made me swoon when it happened in the movies. Experiencing it in real life nearly made my knees buckle.

Shay lowered his head slowly towards me, his eyes searching mine, for me to protest, to stop him. Wasn't going to happen, even though I knew I should.

His mouth inched closer, his warm breath tinged with the slightest scent of beer, ghosted over my waiting lips, before capturing them with his own.

I didn't need to wait until dusk to experience fireworks, they were going off all around me. They were shooting off behind my closed lids, sparking inside my chest. It was like my body had been dead and had been jolted back to life with one taste of his tongue.

Gasping into his mouth, I breathed him in. Tasting him, letting him wash over me. Our hands were grasping, pulling each other closer in the small room, until every inch of us was touching. He tasted of sunshine, summer days, and…my future.

Sliding a leg over his hip, I ground against him, trying to align our cocks despite our vast height difference. It didn't work, but the friction I managed to get humping against his hard thigh was heaven.

Breaking apart, the ragged sound of our breathing filled the room, before our lips crashed together in another hungry kiss. Sliding my hand down his hard chest, my fingers slipped past the elastic of his swim trunks, grasping his hard cock in my hand.

Shay moaned wantonly against my mouth, and I moaned at the feel of him against my palm. Velvety heat and solid steel. My hole clenched remembering how his large cock had filled me perfectly, his knot locking us together, over and over. Slick pooled at my entrance, sliding down my crease.

Our scents became heavier in the room, darker, mingling together in an erotic perfume that had my mouth watering.

Breaking the kiss, I slid down Shay's body, on my knees in front of him. Peeking up at him through my lashes, I tugged at the waistband of his trunks, pulling them down to mid-thigh, freeing his cock. It bobbed between us, and I licked my lips in anticipation. I wanted him in my mouth, wanted to taste him, smell him, wanted to feel him fucking my face.

Shay looked down at me, one hand braced against the wall, his pupils blown so much his eyes looked nearly black. "Bennett… "

My name was a whisper on his lips, a caress, a plea. One I was more than happy to answer.

Sliding my hand up his length, I caressed him, before sucking his thick, mushroom head between my hungry lips.

"Fuuuccckkk," Shay hissed loudly, and I reached my free hand up and pinched his nipple.

"Shhh," I moaned around his cock in my mouth, feeling the sound vibrate down his length. Locking eyes with him, his lips were pressed tightly together, his free hand planted over his mouth as his hips flexed forward. Silently begging me for more, and I was happy to oblige.

He was too long and wide for me to take all of him without choking, so I sucked his length down as far as I could, before sliding my lips back up the length of him. Using my hands, tongue and lips, I stroked him, sucked him, and teased him.

Shay was doing his best to keep his moans buried in his hand, his other hand flat against the wall, his legs spread and braced. My dick was throbbing, pushing out the top of my swim trunks. Frustrated, I pushed them down one hip with my hand. Dick free, I moaned in relief around Shay's cock, feeling his thighs flex at the sensation.

The hand he'd been using to stifle his groans snaked around the back of my head, pushing his dick farther down my throat, and I gagged. Pulling back, tears streamed down my cheeks.

His hand gentled, guiding my head, as he slid his cock in and out between my parted lips. Hips flexing, he rocked on his feet, fucking into my wet, warm heat.

Using a free hand, I grabbed a handful of his perfectly round ass, pulling him even closer. His musk surrounded my face, dark and spicy, and I wanted to stay there forever, buried in his scent .

My dick was bobbing with each thrust, and as Shay's hip motion sped up, his panting harsh breaths filling the room, I grasped my dick tightly in my hand. Shay's muscles tightened, the tendons of his neck standing out. His mouth opened in a silent cry and his release flooded my mouth.

Trying to swallow it all, I moaned as some slipped down my chin. My hand moved faster on my own cock, my slick ran down the backs of my thighs, and my cum shot out of me. My orgasm was intense enough that everything around me went white, my mouth going lax, causing me to lose my grasp on Shay's cock. It slipped from between my parted lips, smacking me lightly on my chin.

Trying to catch my cum in my hand, I smeared it against my stomach, hoping I hadn't shot too much of it onto the tile.

Blowing my load on the bathroom floor, while I blew my host's brother, seemed like a pretty sure-fire way to never get invited over again.

Shay grasped my hand, the one dripping cum all over, and brought it up to his mouth. Eyes wide, I watched as his tongue lapped from my wrist to one finger, his eyes locked onto mine hotly, as he licked my hand clean. Pulling me to my feet, it was his turn to hit his knees, as he did the same thing to my stomach. He didn't stop licking until every last trace of my release was cleaned from my skin. It was gentle, loving, and the most erotic thing I had ever experienced.

He rested his cheek against my bare stomach for a moment, his arms pulling me tightly against him. Peering down at him, his eyes closed as he lay against me, I lightly threaded my fingers through his blond hair. Not ready to give up this closeness with him yet .

Shay looked up at me with hooded, lazy eyes, and I bent, capturing his lips in a light kiss, tasting myself on his tongue.

"We should go back to the party," he finally managed, his voice gravelly and he reluctantly stood. Nodding, I moved around him to wash my hands.

Catching him staring at me in the mirror as he adjusted his clothes, I wasn't sure what to even say. I hadn't planned to blow him in the bathroom. I hadn't planned any of this. But I wasn't sorry it had happened. Not one little bit.

"I'll go first." Resting one hand on the knob, I didn't look at him. "You follow a few minutes later. We can't keep doing this, Shay. It just confuses things. And I don't want you to feel pressure before you're ready, but if we keep doing…things like this when we are near each other…" I shook my head, my voice trailing off. "It's not healthy, for either of us."

Not for him, and not for me. Because this had taught me one thing. I didn't want to give Shay up. I didn't want to keep feeling all these things, and then have to step back and put a lid on them. Act like I didn't feel everything for him I was feeling. It had the potential to tear me apart–had already caused me so much heartache–and I couldn't allow that to happen.

"Bennett," his voice was low, anxious and apprehensive, "I–"

Tilting my head back, I stared up at the white ceiling, making all the words I wanted to say to him stay inside me. I was pretty sure I was in love with this man, had been almost from the very beginning. But I wasn't what he needed right now. And if the book on fated mates was correct, things like this were bound to keep happening when we were near each other. And they just couldn't right now. Not if we were ever going to have a chance.

"Don't say anything, please," I begged him, my voice shaking with emotion. "We'll just keep a distance. Neighbors. Please know if you need anything, someone to watch Lucas, you can come to me. But I think you're right. Until all this is settled between you and Edward, I think it's best if we don't…if we just keep away from each other."

Slipping out the door, I closed it firmly behind me, thankful to find the foyer area empty of anyone waiting to use the facilities. Which I hoped meant no one had heard what we'd been up to. Or would ask what had taken me so long to pee.

Rubbing a hand over my face, I hurried over to the lounge chair Seth was still reclined on. Starting to gather my things, I gave the group of questioning eyes a wan smile.

"I'm not feeling that well," placing a hand over my stomach, I tried to look sick. It wasn't far from the truth, my emotions were all over the place making me feel slightly queasy. "I think I'm going to head home. Thank you for a wonderful afternoon, Gabe."

There was a chorus of well wishes and get wells. Seth sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the lounger. Sliding his glasses down his nose, so he could see me above the rims, he smirked.

"Oh, something is not sitting well in your stomach all right, and it ain't food, baby cakes." Leaning forward, he whispered, "You smell like spunk, and that blond alpha you have heart eyes over."

"Shut it!" Hissing, I grabbed my towel from underneath his leg, ignoring the curious looks from the others and Gabe's raised brows. "You know too much sun makes me queasy."

"So does too much cum," he sassed, raising a dark brow at me.

"Oh snap!" Wade whispered, while Gabe groaned, covering his face with his large hand .

Rolling my eyes, I shoved my towel in a wad in my bag with more force than was needed. "Don't be a dick. I'll talk to you later. Not today. You're pissing me off."

Turning to the group, I told them sincerely, "It was really nice chatting with you all. Hopefully we can do this again before the summer is over."

"Mmmm," Wade tapped a finger against his lips. "I'm gonna add you to our little chat group." He pointed his finger at Seth, "Both of you. I think you might need The Musketeers. Something is brewing here." He waved a hand around, and I didn't know if they had all guessed something really had gone down between Shay and me, or he was trying to conjure a spell. You never really knew with Wade; it could go either way.

I was positive they all suspected something; Shay and I had disappeared for way too long at the same time. Then Seth had opened his big, fat, gossipy mouth.

"Um, I'm not sure what that means, but sure."

Waving to them all, I quickly made my way back to my house, locking my door behind me. Hoping Seth would respect my boundaries and would just let me wallow in my feelings for a bit. Plus, I really was miffed at him.

Hours later, amidst the sounds of firecrackers bursting loudly in the sky, I heard the sound of a key scrape in my front door. Soft footsteps that I recognized made their way slowly down the hallway, and I waited, facing away from the door. I'd been laying in my bed, staring out my bedroom window for hours.

The bed dipped as Seth laid down next to me, his chest brushing my back. His arms wrapped around me in a hug, and he rested his chin on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, B," he whispered, "I shouldn't have teased you. Don't stay mad at me. If it's any consolation, Shay looked wrecked the rest of the night. And I have to say that made me feel good. Because I hate seeing you hurting. It makes me stabby."

"I'm not mad at you. I mean, I was. You're such a brat sometimes, but I'm sorry I was so bitchy."

He kissed my cheek, flopping onto his back and sprawling like a starfish. Rolling over, we both stared up at the ceiling. The pops of fireworks tossed colored lights along the ceiling and wall.

"You didn't have to leave before the fireworks were done," I whispered in the dark.

Seth shrugged. "I don't like you being mad at me." Turning on his side, he propped himself up on his elbow, so I did the same. "You're really gone on this guy, huh? Is it the fated mate thing? Is that what has you so…"

"So?" Raising a brow at him, I waited to see how he was going to finish that sentence, my irritation coming back hard and fast. Which really wasn't like me at all, but everything had me on edge lately, my fuse short.

"Don't know," he admitted, frowning, wrinkling his nose. "Not acting like yourself."

Going back to staring up at the ceiling, I watched it turn red and orange and blue, as the sky outside exploded with colors and sound.

"Maybe." I shrugged. "Probably. I don't know. I think I love him." I finally whispered, admitting to my bestie what I couldn't admit to anyone else, especially Shay. "And I'm not what he needs right now, Seth. The worst thing is I know it, and I understand it, but it sucks. It sucks big time. He's not a bad guy. He's actually a really great guy, and I respect the hell out of him for knowing what is best for him and Lucas right now."

I just wished what was best for them both was me .

Seth didn't say anything, just wrapped me in his arms and let me softly sob into his shoulder until we both fell asleep.