12: ONYX

"So, how are things working out with the project planning team selection?"

"It's been intense. I'll be honest. It's been a hectic, fast-paced two weeks, but I'm loving it. I'm excited about this project and seeing how it develops. I've got some wonderful members on the team already. We're still in the process of vetting a few more external applicants before I present your final team, though."

"I'm looking forward to digging in and getting the work started."

She smiles at me and shakes her head.

"What?"

"You. Owning your own company and being the boss; it's a good look on you, Nyx."

"I always told you I would."

"You did."

"Shouldn't have doubted me."

"Not your capability," she says, pointing her coffee cup at me.

"Then what did you doubt?"

"Whether you would be happy settling into one space for too long. You always had this wanderlust in your heart. I expected you to trot around the globe changing the world."

I throw my head back laughing at her statement and when I stop, I see that she has a warm smile on her face. "Well, I do change the world in my own way. But you. You were the one always trying to help someone out by bridging gaps through pairing people up who you recognized as being compatible to work together and having something that the other one needed. I thought you would be the one who would own your own company one day."

Shaking her head, her hair flies from side to side. "No, I was never interested in that."

"You were brilliant, Sharla. You could have. People followed your lead and listened to you. You always had these great ideas."

"I was a visionary but I didn't want the responsibility of being settled down with a company and all these people depending on me for their well-being. Like with this team you've tasked me with building, I enjoy partnering with the different people that I'm collaborating with to build the team. I love identifying their strengths and weaknesses and assessing how they would be or wouldn't be suitable for this team."

"You're excellent at what you do," I say, dragging a shy smile from her. "And one day, you just might own your own company that does exactly what you do; bringing resolution initiatives to the people."

"No. You are great in this space," she says, laughing as she draws her fingers back and forth in dizzying lines.

"It's a huge responsibility, but I don't regret a single moment."

"Look at you, being Mr. CEO."

Laughing, I reply, "It's in my DNA."

She lifts her eyebrows and looks away before taking a bite of her tuna sandwich. It's the middle of the day, and I came down to the park across the street from the office like I sometimes do for lunch.

It's great to break the monotony every now and then. When I looked up and spotted Sharla walking my way, I invited her to have a seat on the bench with me.

"And married, huh?"

"I am."

"How long?"

"Two, going on three years."

"So, you'd already started your company before you married her?"

"Yeah. I had it before I met her. I was acquiring contracts all along the east coast and a few sprinkled on the west coast. I didn't go global until after she and I married."

"That must have taken a lot of time away from her."

"It did. She sacrificed a lot of date nights, early mornings, and so much more for me to accomplish what I have, but she said it was worth it."

Those memories pierce my heart, and I find myself missing my wife.

"Sounds like you've got a wonderful partner, Onyx."

"I couldn't ask for better. Although these days, she's fed up with the traveling."

Nodding, she says, "I can imagine that. However, anyone who knows you knows what you love. Whether it's for vacation or work purposes, you'll only be happy when you're operating in the space you were born for."

"I guess," I mumble.

"And what does she do?"

"She owns her own dance studio. Mirage."

"I've heard of that. I can see that."

"See what?"

"You with the artist type. Whenever I thought of you, I always imagined you with a Bohemian woman."

"You're so full of it, Shar," I say, easily reverting to the name I used to call her.

It was always easy to converse with her and just sit back and kick it. That was one of the things that I missed most when we lost contact. She was the only person I could call a true friend.

Sharla never wanted anything from me or placed the same expectations on me that others did. She just wanted me to be me and to be happy.

"Kids?"

"Not yet."

"What would your wife think of you having lunch with me?"

I finish chewing my sub sandwich and look up at her. "As my employee, she would have no problem with it."

"But...and I do hear one," she says, tearing the crust from her bread.

"You always did that. Thought you'd grow out of it one day."

"What?" she asks, scowling before taking a bite of her sandwich.

"Took the crust off your bread."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No. Just something that kids usually do."

She chews and stares thoughtfully at me. When she finishes, she says, "And you were never good at changing the subject. So, I repeat...what's your ‘but' in that statement?"

"Who said there was one?"

"Some things change, and some don't. My ability to read you hasn't."

I blow out a breath and smile at her.

"As my ex and a woman that I find attractive, she'd take issue with that."

"Smart woman," she says.

"We've talked about me quite a bit. What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Tell me about Sharla Watson; the woman and not my employee," I encourage.

"You already know me."

"No, I know the person that you were. You're a full-grown woman with life experiences now. I want to know who that person is."

Laughing, she says, "Now, those are the types of questions that can get you in trouble."

"Why is that?" I ask, grabbing a napkin and wiping my mouth with it after finishing the last of my sub sandwich.

"Because when you become interested in a woman and get to know her personally, you find yourself stepping into deep waters. The rubber boots you put on will only weigh you down," she says with a sparkle in her eyes and a flirty smile on her lips.

I smirk. "Is that your way of telling me to mind my business?"

She chuckles and says, "No. Let's see, I'm a divorcee with no kids and whose ex-husband lives on the other side of the country to be close to his son from a prior relationship. He's working on their broken relationship."

"How old were you when you married him?"

"Twenty-four."

"Wow! Not long after college?"

She smiles and nods. "Yes. Dated him from freshman year on. I was determined to prove that he wasn't a rebound relationship for me. Go ahead."

"What?"

"You want to ask what happened to my marriage."

"A polite, Southern gentleman would never pry into a woman's business like that, especially not one whose mother raised him right."

"Fine. I'll tell you anyway. He discovered that he was into polyamory. I discovered that for him that meant men and women alike. He discovered that I wasn't that girl, and I'd cut his dick off for fucking men or another woman."

My eyes widen, and she giggles as I choke on my soda. Sharla scoots closer to me on the bench and pats my back. Her proximity, the smell of her sunflower perfume, the brush of her breast against the side of my arm, her warm breath caressing my face, and her soft but firm hand on my back throws me off kilter. Maybe she's right, and I can't handle being her friend; but I don't say that.

After I regain my composure, she returns to her side of the bench.

"I never would have guessed it. Although that dick-cutting thing I could see."

"I met Manny when we were both freshmen in college, but I wasn't ready for a relationship then."

"Yeah, I can see that."

"Right. So, on the rebound from you, I didn't want to make him that, but he didn't care. And I was determined that he wasn't that. He pushed and pushed for more from me until I finally gave in during the middle of freshman year. We had a false scare in our senior year and were both relieved to find that we weren't having a child, especially since he'd already had one during his junior year of high school.

"When we married, I took his son in as my own. He was eight and a handful. Jose's mama was trying to teach us a lesson by dropping him off on our doorstep the day that we moved into our apartment. We didn't see that woman for almost six months. I don't regret my marriage or my relationship with Jose, my stepson. He's nineteen, in college, kid-free, and still has an excellent relationship with me."

"It's commendable that you took on a child that wasn't yours and loved him like that."

"It wasn't really an option for me. If I took on the man, then I took on everything that came with him. And when I found out the truth about his sexuality, my stepson overheard our argument, and it took a toll on him, too."

"How did you two manage through that?"

"Well, I put my feelings aside to help Jose through that dark time. Manny and I are still friends, and he and Jose are working on their relationship."

"You're a very lovely woman, Sharla, and I think Manny was a fool to give up what may have been the best thing that happened to him."

Sharla shakes her head and turns her lips down. "He seems happy."

"Maybe so, but he may have regretted it somewhere along the way."

"He's tried to come back a couple of times throughout the years, but I know that it wasn't meant to be for us. Life's too short to waste on a person that you know wasn't meant for you. I'd rather live my life by my terms and have fun while I can," she says before sipping her coffee.

"Besides, the single life ain't all that bad. If I was married, I doubt that I'd have the freedom and flexibility to work as late as I always do," she says.

She's right. If the roles were reversed, I would have an issue with MJ being in the same situation that I'm in.

I work late most nights, and Sharla is always designated to be on the team of people that I'm working with.

And somehow, it always ends up being the two of us who are the last to leave.

Nothing is said, and nothing has happened yet. The telltale signs are in the subtle glances we give one another, the smiles that we exchange, and the way that my pulse jumps whenever she comes close to me or our hands touch when we exchange a file.

I feel the storm brewing.