4. ~Caleb~
The last two years had certainly been one hell of a whirlwind.
I’d done a lot of things, I’d been a lot of things.
And through it all, the struggle, the doubt, the highs and lows, I’d finally found my way.
The sad thing was, the actual career aspect had been what I’d set out to do two long years back before that fucked-up night had thrown me off course, before it had thrown everything off course.
Talk about taking the long way around.
Then again, if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have been able to find a balance to that sick and twisted part of me that had been unleashed after that… massacre… I’d perpetrated.
I’d even been able to help others through their dark and fucked-up sides.
Specifically, and my most notable achievement in that area, had been the man who’d become my close friend and ally—and a lot more than that.
Asher Monroe.
He’d come to me struggling with his dark side and fortunately for him it had occurred at just the right time when I’d finally developed the tools to conquer my own. We’d become close following that, although he’d had to go home to Hexwood and then I’d been immersed in setting up my rehabilitation facilities to help those who’d suffered abuse like my sister had. Time had gone by with us at a distance until he’d called me up needing my services to see to the victims he’d been liberating from taking down the Infidels’ human trafficking network. I’d even participated in the final takedown which had ended the entire operation. Albeit not the Infidels organization itself. No, as punishment, they’d taken Asher, the heads, one being his own father, Carson, had tortured him. So I’d stepped in with my hacking skills to help his boys find him, and we’d managed to pull him out.
Although my part of the mission had been completed, I’d remained. Here in their safehouse. I’d been concerned that the abuse Ash had suffered in captivity would reawaken all that darkness in him.
And in a sense it had.
The problem was, he’d had me undo the mental blocks I’d put in place that helped him to control it, because he wanted to transcend that suffering and bring the full force of that brutality and power with the coming final battle against his enemies.
While I understood his reasoning, especially after everything he’d suffered through recently, it did burn that he’d had me undo everything I’d helped him put in place to control that beast within him.
And now his boys, Jonah and Killian, were worried as fuck about him being in this state. Their woman, Aurora, would be too, once they were finally able to track her down and bring her back to them.
Wild times. Intense fucking times.
I returned my attention to the book I was trying to busy myself with while we were in this downtime state before shit hit the fan all over again.
I’d found it amongst the many books in the small bookshelf over on the other side of the living room. Back at Hexwood House, there was basically a library’s worth, but here at the safehouse a lot was limited, as it needed to be. But Ash needed to have them on hand, reading was one of his hobbies and escapes, along with his whole abstract painting thing.
While I usually preferred a good sitcom to wind down, I’d take a book over nothing else. Although, this particular one wasn’t really working for me. It was too depressing, and I’d wanted to veer off that track. Maybe the title, Great Expectations, was supposed to be ironic or something. Who fucking knew?
Well, the guy who I clocked in my peripheral vision now walking into the living room.
I saw him checking me out lounging back on the couch reading with my legs resting on the coffee table in front of me. His eyes wandered all over my vibrant snake tattoos on display in my white muscle tee, then they traveled down to my gray sweats, before taking in my tousled and kind of wild blond hair, the way it looked in my downtime where I just shoved a hand through it and that was the extent of it.
I finally looked up at him, my eyes connecting with his sexy silver orbs briefly, before I took in the fact that he looked like his normal self again. His inky black hair, shaved short on the sides and tousled on top had his fancy mousse styling it, and he was back to his hot-as-sin black jeans and dress shirt combo, the whole ensemble emphasizing all that toned muscle.
I gestured to the open book in my hand. “Does this get less depressing as it goes along?”
“It’s a dreary world being depicted by Dickens.”
“Even so. By the way, this Estella is a piece of work. Then again, she was twisted into that by Miss Havisham from a disturbingly early age.”
“So that absolves her of her cruelty and actions?”
“Not as an adult, then the responsibility is all hers. It’s not easy to get out from under that shadow and influence though.” I challenged, “Is it?”
He didn’t respond, his expression didn’t change.
That was a good sign.
I smiled as I put the book down on the coffee table. “Just checking it’s holding.”
“It’s holding very well,” he assured me, walking up to me.
“Intense after not giving it proper breath for so long, yeah?”
Again, he didn’t respond. Instead, he drew ever closer, and I studied him, trying to get a read on him. What was he intending?
He rounded the coffee table, then stepped over my legs, straddling them as he stood over me.
Then he had excitement thrumming through me as he slapped his hands down either side of my head on the couch. “Is that what you want?”
I swallowed hard. “What’s that?”
“To provoke that side of me.”
Nice try. “Please, you won’t hurt me. You consider me your inner circle.”
“Interesting that your mind went there.” He leaned in real close, his hot breath fanning over the side of my face as he whispered sexily, “I’m not talking about hurting you. At least not in that way.”
His minty cologne wafted over me, his closeness making my cock twitch.
The next thing I knew, I was turning into him, my cheek brushing against his. My breath hitched at his delectable closeness.
And then he breathed me in. Fuck, yeah.
“You want that intensity from me. You want me to unleash all over you.”
“Ash—”
He nipped at my earlobe, making me groan. “You want what you’ve always wanted from me, what you’ve barely been able to admit to yourself. My domination, sweetheart.”
“You think I want you to top me?” I asked, scoffing.
I hadn’t gone that route in a long time. I always topped these days, always dominated, always controlled. The truth was, I hadn’t trusted anybody to top me but Caspian. And there was also the fact that it would mean letting go in a way I hadn’t allowed myself since that fucked-up night two years ago.
But with Ash as he was right now, in this beast state, it called to me in a way that threatened to transcend all that, a way that made me want to transcend it all just to have that with him, to experience it.
Ash fisted his hand in my hair, dragging my gaze to his. “Absolutely. You want me to own you. While I’m in this specific state. You wanted it back then, but I was focused on burying this part of me at the time.”
He brushed his lips against mine and, fuck, he had me under his spell, the needing pulsating through me.
I leaned in.
But then the fucker pulled back abruptly and released me completely, smirking. “The thing is, you’re right about me considering you part of my inner circle. That means I’ll protect you, come what may. Even from me.”
“You think I can’t handle you?” My voice came out as a croak, so fucking hoarse that it was damned obvious how turned on he’d gotten me.
“I don’t think, I know. If I come at you fully unleashed, no holding back, like you want, I’ll decimate you.”
“I’d be willing to take the risk.”
“Because you don’t understand what that truly entails.”
Give me a break. “I was the one who helped you tame it last time and I’ve just helped you let it back in now.”
“When I came to you I was afraid of it, so I never showed you it. It was all about burying it as quickly as possible. And right now, we’re biding time. You haven’t seen it, Cal. Take me at my word—you don’t want to be its target.”
“And what about me?”
I jolted at the sound of Jonah’s voice, and Ash pulled away from me and looked out at Jonah striding into the room. He was wearing only a pair of boxers, sweat dripping down over all that mammoth powerhouse muscle, all that delicious ink covering pretty much every inch of him. He’d been working out again, trying to get out his frustrations with the state of Ash right now putting them at a distance.
Hell, I was right there with him there.
“I’ll hold back,” Ash told him.
“I don’t want that, Asher.”
“Too bad.”
Jonah got up in his space. “I want you raw.”
“Not like this.”
Jonah blew out a breath of obvious frustration. “I get that you’re shutdown now, but if that’s the way you can express something—sexually and hardcore—I’m here for it. I’ll take whatever you can give until you’re out of this mentality and back to yourself.” He stepped back. “Although, that being said, we’re gonna have to give it time first. You’re still injured and I also don’t think you’re ready yet to go to a sexual—”
“End of discussion,” Ash commanded, holding up his hand. “Our plan worked. Lance is bringing Aurora here.”
“What? Seriously?”
Ash gave a nod. “He just contacted me. She’ll be back with us in seventy-two hours and he also wants to work with us to end this shitshow.”
“Holy shit. Princess is coming. Fuck, yes.”
Good. This was very good. For Ash and the rest of them. She brought balance to them.
But the other part? Him working with her father, Revenant, after it had been discovered that he’d been responsible for pushing Ash into the clutches of the Infidels wherein he’d been brutally tortured… that didn’t bode well at all.
Neither did his apparent non-reaction to it.
It had me pushing to my feet and approaching them. “Work with Revenant? Are you going to be able to do that?”
“He’s an asset.”
“But after what he did to you, setting you up the way he did, isn’t that going to be a little hard to overlook?”
“A major fucking understatement there,” Jonah growled.
“The mission is what matters.”
Jonah and I exchanged a very concerned look.
“Asher—” Jonah started.
“I need to inform Killian and Aaron.”
With that, he just took off, pulling his phone out, leaving me and Jonah staring after him.
“Fuck, this isn’t good,” Jonah grunted.
“I don’t disagree.”
He glared for a moment, then focused on me, his eyes dipping to the noticeable hard-on through my sweatpants.
And then the fucker licked his lips. “Interesting.”
“You think this is for you?” I teased.
He shoved a hand through his spiky hair, mussing up the vibrant-blue and black strands. “I think it could be. All too easily with how on edge Ash being like this is making you.”
Hmm. Well, I couldn’t deny that.
“Shame he’s ordered me not to go there with you unless he’s a part of it.”
“If he comes to you for that again, it only happens in my presence. Are we clear?”
While Ash had been away, I’d comforted Jonah in the way he’d needed. With some intense sexual exorcising so he could purge all the volatility building within him and threatening to make him lose control while Ash had been held captive, while we’d been fighting to free him from it all.
When Ash had found out about it, he’d been happy that I’d been able to give Jonah that kind of comfort in his absence. But he’d also exhibited jealously and no small amount of possessiveness, hence him wanting me to make him that deal of only touching Jonah in his presence.
“Which he can’t be when he’s like this, so it’s moot.” He stepped up closer. “Besides, aren’t you the guy who doesn’t take orders from anybody these days? The lone wolf acting by his own wants and desires?”
“I guess we’ll see.”
With that, I turned from him and walked out.
I needed a fucking smoke.
To say I was right on the edge and beyond sexually frustrated right now didn’t cut it.
It looked like I was about to fall right over that edge too.
I pacedthe bedroom that had been assigned to me like a caged animal.
And that was exactly what I felt like right now—a fucking animal.
Raw. On edge. This unbearable need to unleash. So much stress and intensity building to a burdensome degree.
It really hadn’t helped that a few hours ago when their woman, Aurora, had arrived here with her father, it had drawn uncomfortable parallels to Skylar. The wish I’d tried to bury since I’d been away from Rossun of wanting her back, to be reunited with her and Cas and Bastian.
The brutal difference was that it really didn’t seem like it was in the cards for us.
For so many reasons, her being in the wind only one of them, one of so many complications.
Aurora had come accompanied by her father, Lance “Revenant” Carlyle and Ash had given into his beast and attacked him, punishing him for fucking him over. It had taken me and his other long-time ally, Aaron Wakefield, who was a former Infidels member turned Asher’s greatest supporter and surrogate father figure, to calm him down. That wasn’t all that bastard was, as I’d known long before he’d walked in here and introduced himself to me while me and Asher’s boys had been trying to track Ash down. He didn’t know that I knew the truth about him, and there hadn’t been a need to call him on it. It would only antagonize an already volatile Ash, and that was the last thing he needed. Besides, what Aaron had been up to unbeknownst to Ash didn’t take away from the fact that he was loyal to him through and through.
The only person it really impacted was me.
And I was fine with that—for now.
The house was quiet, everybody asleep, getting their rest while they could, before the big battle to take down the Infidels came, something we’d be strategizing any day now.
Once that was done, I needed to get gone.
I had become too involved, too close to everyone.
My connection to Ash was gnawing at me, along with the painful similarity of it to my relationship with Caspian.
I was falling into that trap again and I couldn’t allow it.
I just… wasn’t ready.
I stopped pacing and spun toward my made bed.
Maybe I should just take the edge off by taking matters into my own hands.
Quite literally.
I turned my nose up.
I didn’t really like doing that. Without somebody to feed off, my release was mild at best, and it wouldn’t be enough to satiate me the way I needed.
Although, it was better than nothing.
Fuck it.
I ripped off my tee and tossed it across the room.
Then I pulled off my sweatpants and boxers next.
I was about to start for the bed and settle in, when a knock sounded on my door.
I stilled, caught off guard, when my head had been in jerking off mode.
“Cal, it’s J. You still awake?” Jonah’s voice came.
Hmm.
Without another thought, I strode to the door and threw it open.
And there he was, all inked bulk and muscle, standing at the threshold.
His eyes widened as he took in the sight of me completely naked, and my cock hard and needy against my abs.
I smirked at his delicious reaction, and stroked myself for his viewing pleasure.
The hooding of his eyes and the sexy growl that came from him had jolts of bliss zipping through me.
“Yeah, I’m up,” I said.
The intended innuendo hit home and he grinned. “I’d say.”
His eyes fixed on me teasing my hard cock. It had his own erection pushing against his tight boxers.
“I’m warning you, Jonah, the way I’m feeling, you take a step across the threshold and I’ll tear into you. I won’t be able to hold back. I won’t stop until you’re choking on my cum, your ass raw from taking a merciless reaming from my big fat cock.”
His eyes darkened. “Exactly what I was counting on.”
He was pushing something into my free hand then, and I looked to see a packet of lube there.
Well, then.
I grabbed him by his nape and shoved him inside my room.
Kicking the door shut and locking it, I spun around to see him eagerly shoving down his boxers, then throwing them aside, his cock bouncing against his abs with his jerky movements.
I stalked to him, his eyes burning into mine with my every menacing step, clearly getting off on me taking it here. I tossed the packet of lube onto one of the pillows, then I wrenched his shoulders down, making him land on his ass at the foot of the bed. I fisted my hand in his hair, angling his head back, so it rested on the edge of the mattress. Then I grasped his jaw and shoved my thumb against his lips.
He opened right away, stretching his mouth wide, allowing me to ram my thumb inside and open him up for me. “Keep that throat open to me,” I commanded.
Then I straddled his face, pressed my palm to his forehead, keeping him immobile, as I thrust my cock into his wide, open mouth, driving deep right down his throat in one brutal motion.
He gagged for me like a good boy.
I pulled almost all the way out, then rammed down his throat again, enjoying the sounds of him spluttering, loving the struggle.
And then I fucked into him, thrusting down his throat with no mercy, pleasure sparking like livewires, making me throw my head back as he took it all, even opening his throat wider and trying to give me more, so desperate for me to take my fill.
“There’s my good savage slut. Your cock is dripping for me, begging for me to ravage your throat and stuff you full of cock. Isn’t that right?”
“Mmmf,” he spluttered in response.
His tongue came into play and I jolted, losing my rhythm for a moment as he started going feral all over me, slathering and swirling wildly.
“Christ, that fucking tongue,” I grunted. “There it is. Yeah… ungh… feast on me, boy.”
He reached behind me and dug his fingers into my ass cheeks, his tongue not letting up for a second, making my balls draw tight, taking me higher and higher, pleasure swirling around me like a goddamn tornado, just as his tongue worked me over like one.
He was a fucking animal.
Just. Like. Me.
He spread my ass cheeks, then I felt wetness being dragged up to my hole. The stickiness of it pointed to it being his pre-cum.
He gathered more and more until my hole was slick, and then he pushed what felt like a thumb inside.
I lurched and went harder, pumping down his throat fucking violently—what he clearly wanted by teasing me like this.
Harder. Rougher. Absolutely fucking merciless.
Another thumb popped inside, then he was grinding them into me, stretching and twisting, creating one hell of a burn that called to the pain whore in me in a major way.
Fuck. My balls were drawing tighter.
If we kept this up, I was gonna have him choking on my cum already.
I ripped my cock from his mouth and slapped his hands away from my ass, sucking in a steadying breath as his digits left me empty.
“Get on the bed,” I ordered, slapping my cock in his face as he raised his head and looked up at me, eyes glazed. “All fours. Stick that sweet ass out for me.”
He scrambled up and moved into position, as I walked around the bed and pulled open the nightstand drawer and took out a condom. I ripped open the packet with my teeth, then rolled it down over my cock. Then I snatched up the packet of lube. Tearing it open, I squirted a generous amount onto my cock, then slicked it all over my shaft and crown, grinning as he watched me, actually panting and then licking his lips.
When I was done, I handed it to him, but he shook his head.
I cocked an eyebrow.
“Changed my mind. Forget the lube, I want it raw.”
Damn.
He had me pausing for a moment.
No.
“Believe me, with the way I’m gonna fuck you, you don’t. I’ll break your ass, babe.”
“I don’t fucking care.”
“Too bad. I do.” I might be in a fucking state, but I wouldn’t hurt him like that. Plus, he wasn’t mine, and Ash definitely wouldn’t like it. It was bad enough that I’d lost control and invited Jonah in here as it was.
Well, he’d shown up at my door practically begging for it, but still.
He snatched the lube with a grunt, then started slicking his fingers, while keeping one hand and both knees on the bed. “Fine, just hurry. You’re killing me. That skull-fucking really worked me up. I need you in me, Cal. Real bad, all right?”
“Right there with you,” I said, walking back behind him and watching as he pushed two fingers into his delicious ass and worked himself open, slicking his hole with the lube.
I ran my hands over his muscled ass. “Good boy, get yourself nice and slippery to welcome my cock.”
He groaned at my words and started finger-fucking himself, losing control.
I snatched his wrist and yanked his fingers free, making him whimper.
“Be still,” I told him, slapping his hand away.
He placed it back down on the bed beneath him, then stuck his ass up higher in invitation.
I spread his left ass cheek open, exposing his winking hole again, all wet and dripping, and so fucking needy.
Then I lined my cock up and pushed inside.
He grunted as I worked my crown past the tight ring.
“Yes, fuck, yes,” he was panting as I eased through into his warmth.
I held there, enjoying his whimpers as I made his muscles convulse around my cock head, making him really feel me.
And then I sank inside, driving a good few inches into his depths.
“Ungh, yeah, that greedy ass is taking my cock so well.”
“Fuck, Cal. More. Give me fucking more.”
I grinned and started fucking him with slow, shallow thrusts, opening him for me, my eyes rolling back in my head as he clenched down around my shaft so beautifully.
“Jesus, you’re a fucking tease,” he choked.
I chuckled darkly. “Can’t have you getting ahead of yourself and coming too soon. This is going all night.”
“Please, I can get it back up in minutes. Just fuck me, Cal. Really fuck me.”
“And you’ll be my ass slut for the whole night?”
“Jesus Christ, yes! All fucking night long!”
I reached over and yanked on his hair. “Say it.”
“Fuck me like a motherfucking animal, Cal,” he pleaded. “Get that big cock nice and deep. Fill me up with that hot cum. I want it dripping down my thighs, then you fucking it right back inside where it belongs.”
“Fuck,” I groaned.
In the next second, I dug my fingers into his hips, then I let loose, pounding into him like a machine, the force of every thrust driving him up the bed. Rapid-fire, punishing, and goddamn brutal.
Both our cries of pleasure were filling the room, sounding all around us, bouncing off the fucking walls.
He pushed back against me in his building need, slamming his ass right against my balls, then grinding. Hell, yes.
“Yeah, fuck back on me like the whore you are for me, babe!”
“Rougher, Cal! Harder! Give me everything!”
Hell, the guy could take a lot.
And that was exactly what I gave him.
Sweat was dripping down my back, my balls slapping against his ass, and he had his face buried in the sheets, his fingers digging into them as he tried to stabilize himself against my violent fucking.
“Ah, motherfucker, I’m gonna come,” he cried into the sheets.
I reached around and cupped his cock. It was hot to the touch, basically pulsing in my hand.
My balls drew tight.
I was right there.
And then he spurted into my hand, hot cum spilling all over my palm and fingers.
It set me off and I roared as I slammed deep then held as I came inside him, filling his delicious ass up with my cum.
I slathered his stickiness all over his chest, up to his neck, then over his lips.
As he lapped up everywhere he could reach, I pulled out, watching as my cum dripped out of his ass.
I gathered it on my fingers and stuffed it back inside, loving his groans and him twisting against me from the over-stimulation.
When I was done, he rolled onto his back, slapping a hand to his head and breathing heavily. “That’s what I’m talking about.”
I chuckled then flopped down beside him, the two of us staring up at the ceiling and basking in the afterglow.
“Give me a few moments, then I want you eating my face while I watch you ride my cock.”
“Mmm… hell, yes.”
An aggressive thump sounded on the door, making both of us swing our heads toward it.
Revenant’svoice yelled in the next second, “Jonah, Caleb, lower the volume or take it the fuck outside. My baby girl needs her rest. We all do.”
As his heavy, agitated footsteps sounded down the corridor, Jonah and I grinned at one another. Not likely.
I wasn’t close to being done yet.
And, judging by the way Jonah was eye-fucking me as we laid together, he wasn’t either.