34. Charlie

CHAPTER 34

Charlie

" W ill you accept a trade?" Tony pleaded, holding up one of the dark blue properties he'd been hoarding the entire game so no one else could have it. "And we can forget about the debt?"

"Oh no," I grinned, taking far too much pleasure in bringing this man down a peg or three. Even if it was only in Monopoly. "You're going to sell and mortgage until you have enough money to pay me."

"Damn you're a hardass, Chuck."

I flinched at the nickname. Of course, Tony had noticed by now that it bothered me, so he used it as often as possible. Considering he wouldn't let up on it, I didn't think I owed him any mercy.

"I didn't know you were so good at this game, Charlie," Patrick said, nudging me in the shoulder. "You've got a great mind for business."

"It's an easy game to win," I said, shooting a glare at Tony. "If you're reasonably intelligent, anyway. "

"I don't know," Tyler added, looking down at his three properties that were fully developed. It was all he had left. "If there's a strategy to this, I definitely don't know it."

"Give me everything you can for these," Tony said, turning to Nix who was playing the banker. He pushed all his properties and houses toward him. "I need to somehow find six thousand dollars."

Nix took one glance at everything he had and shook his head. "You ain't gonna find it there."

Tony huffed, turning back to me. "Are you sure you won't accept a trade?"

I shook my head.

"Well. I'm out then," he said, throwing his arms in the air. "I lose."

"If I land on anything of yours Charlie, I'll be dead meat too," Patrick nodded, leaning back in his chair.

Both Nix and Tyler agreed.

"So, you're all just gonna give up?" I asked, smiling wide. They all nodded in turn. "I guess I win then," I laughed, wiggling in happiness. "I guess Tony should've picked a game he was good at."

Nix shot me a look that said stop being a dickhead , but I didn't care.

"Well, I know a game that I can't lose , Chuckles."

I rolled my eyes. "And what's that?"

"It's called ‘let's go get ice cream' ."

There was a round of approval from everyone in the group. I couldn't blame them either. It had been hot as hell for weeks now. Even though the sun was setting, and the air conditioning was on, everyone was decked out in shorts and still sweating. Of course, the pizza, beer, and laughter probably hadn't helped us stay cool. But it was hard not to have a good time when everyone was over. Despite my best efforts, I was even enjoying Tony's company. The dude was a dick, but he was funny, I had to give him that.

The night had gone a lot smoother than I expected, actually. When Nix first invited everyone over, I was not looking forward to it. I had it in my head that the moment everyone showed up I'd go into meltdown mode and everything would fall apart. There'd be a lot of apologies and disappointed faces as I forced everyone to go home early because I was too broken and anxious to even play a simple game with a few friends.

But that's not what happened at all. With Nix there, I felt grounded. And when Patrick showed up, I didn't feel my anxiety rise. Meeting Tyler was actually enjoyable. He was a nice guy, a bit quieter and smaller than Patrick, and more reserved. He reminded me of myself actually in more ways than one and we hit it off pretty easily. Tony was, by far, the most obnoxious of the group. He liked to be the center of attention and the more beer he consumed, the more that Jersey accent came out. But, like I said, he was funny and even though I took great pleasure in making him suffer, I found him almost tolerable by the end of the night.

"I could go for ice cream," I said at last, joining in with the rest. "It's only a couple miles away, so it'll be a quick walk."

"Walk?!" Tony scoffed. "It's like ninety degrees outside!"

"The sun's about to go down. It'll cool down fast."

"We can just take the SUV," Tony continued, ignoring my suggestion. "I rented the biggest damn one they had anyway for all the fucking books we had to bring out here. But they're gone now, so it'll seat all of us and then some." He waved for everyone to follow him. "I don't mind driving. Might as well get some use out of it before it has to go back tomorrow, anyway. "

Patrick and Tyler got up, following him. Nix started to go but stopped as he realized I hadn't moved from my seat.

"You coming?" he asked, his brows furrowed in concern.

"I… I can't," I replied, my stomach twisting into a tight knot.

He stepped close to me, crouching down and putting his hands on my knees. "Is it the car thing? Because of the accident?"

I nodded, feeling stupid and terrified and nauseous all at the same time.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to," he began. "But the car has been checked by the rental company before we took it to make sure it's in good condition. And it's only a two-mile drive through town. We won't be going up the mountain or even going over thirty-five miles per hour. It'll be nice and easy." He reached out, cupping my cheek. "And I'll be right by your side. I'll hold your hand the entire way if you want. Or you can stay here. It's up to you. I won't force you to do anything you don't want to."

His gaze connected with mine and we stared at one another for a long moment. I wanted to go with him and the guys. But the idea of getting into a car made me physically ill. However, I didn't think I'd get another chance to do something so innocent and normal anytime soon. Nix was leaving for Boston tomorrow and I wouldn't see him for quite a while. As silly as it sounded, I didn't want to miss a moment with him.

And, if I was being logical, he was completely right. The car wouldn't be going fast or very far or out into the mountains. As far as getting in a vehicle went, this was about as safe a ride as I could ask for. Besides, what could happen? Creekside went quiet after dinnertime and with the intense heat, everyone was staying inside anyway. The roads would probably be empty .

I swallowed hard, forcing my anxiety down that threatened to consume me. For six years I'd been avoiding every normal thing related to my life before the accident. But I was only twenty-four years old. Did I really think I was going to avoid a vehicle for the rest of my life? Eventually I'd need to go somewhere outside of Creekside. And if that day came without my having tried to get better, I'd be in a world of hurt.

Maybe it was best to take the leap now when I had support and friends to help me through it.

"No," I finally said, shaking my head. "I'll… I'll go."

"Are you sure?" Nix asked, seemingly surprised by my answer. "It's okay if you don't. The guys will understand."

"I need to do this, Nix." I looked up at him, not trying to hide my fear. "I can't stay trapped in this town and this house for the rest of my life. This fear is never gonna go away if I don't try to overcome it."

"I'll be right by your side the whole way, alright?"

"Okay."

Nix got to his feet, holding out his hand. "Come on. Let's go get some ice cream."

I took his hand, allowing myself to be pulled toward the front door and out into the driveway. There I stood waiting with Patrick, Tyler, and Nix as Tony jogged over to the McKean house and pulled the big SUV around. Everyone piled in and Tony gestured for Nix to join him up front. Instead, he pulled me around to the back and got in first, putting himself in the middle. With my hand in his, I crawled up beside him, shaking the entire way.

"Here's the seatbelt," Nix said, pulling the buckle out from between the seats .

I clicked it into place quickly, my heart pounding so hard I assumed everyone could hear it.

"We're going two miles," Tony scoffed, ignoring his own seatbelt.

"Safety first," Nix replied, clicking his own buckle into place.

Everyone else followed suit but Tony, sitting up front alone, insisted on being the odd man out. With a sigh, he typed in the name of the ice cream place on his phone and propped it up on the dash so he could follow the route. He gave no warning as he threw the car into drive and took off down the street.

The SUV lurched and my arms snapped out automatically, bracing myself against the door and the seat with a gasp. My knuckles were white as I gripped the seat, feeling like I was suddenly going to pass out. Tony took the nearest corner a bit fast, all of us rocking in the back of the vehicle.

"Slow the fuck down!" Nix snapped, noticing how terrified I was. "Stop being a fuckin show off!"

Tony let off the gas, his look of surprise reflecting back in the rearview mirror. He opened his mouth to retort, but when he saw me, he snapped it closed. "Sorry," he muttered, returning his attention to the road.

"Are you okay?" Nix whispered to me, his leg on my thigh.

I just shook my head, the tightness in my chest making it harder and harder to breathe.

"Just look at me," he said, catching my gaze. "Breathe with me, okay?"

He exaggerated the motions, and I did my best to follow them. With each passing breath, I felt the tightness fade a little more. A minute later, as we came to a stop at a four-way crossing, I no longer felt like I was going to pass out. I was still terrified, but not on the verge of unconsciousness.

"I'm okay," I muttered, noticing the intense worry on Nix's face. "Really."

"You sure?"

"Y-Yeah."

The SUV began to move again and I could see the ice cream shop less than a block away. However, we were only halfway through the intersection when I saw Nix's eyes go wide. With lightning like reflexes, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me away from the window. For a moment, I didn't know what to think as my head came to rest against his chest. It was a strange way to be affectionate.

But a single heartbeat later, the SUV was rocked violently as my door was crushed inward, the glass shattering and bouncing off my skin.

"Fuck!" Tony yelled from the front seat. "Where the hell did that come from?"

"Are you guys okay?" Patrick asked from the back, he and Tyler both leaning over to Nix and I. "That guy didn't even fucking stop!"

"Charlie?" Nix asked, pulling back so he could get a look at me. "Are you alright?"

I stared up at him, my eyes wide and my heart beating a million times a second. My mouth opened as I tried to answer him, but no words came out. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't take a breath. I was so preoccupied by the memories flashing through my head, that I could focus on nothing else. I watch in my mind's eye as the tire exploded, the SUV flipped, we skidded toward the side of the mountain, and finally went over the edge. Those final moments of my mother's life, watching her pressing her arm over my chest, still trying to protect me as we careened down the mountain… those were the memories I'd been trying to forget for the past six years.

But the moment the other car hit us, something was jarred loose in my brain. Suddenly I wasn't sure if I was sitting next to Nix or sitting next to my mother once more, reliving the crash for real this time, as if it had never happened.

"Charlie!"

Nix's voice seemed distant and the world around me began to spin. Darkness crept in at the edges.

"Charlie! Breathe!"

But I couldn't. No matter how hard I tried, my lungs wouldn't listen. Instead, the world around me went dark and the last thing I remembered was lifted a trembling hand to Nix's face before it all fell away.