Chapter 3

Mav

"Thor would so kick Hawkeye's butt," I declared as I shot the man across from me a challenging smile.

"Nuh-uh," Matty interjected as he sat up in his hospital bed and searched out the Hawkeye doll that he always had close by along with the well-used Spiderman doll. "Hawkeye has a bow and arrows," he said quickly as he pointed to the quiver of arrows on the Hawkeye doll's back. "He could shoot Thor before Thor even knew what hit him," Matty insisted. "Isn't that right, Papa?" Matty asked as he turned his attention on the man sitting on the other side of the bed.

I didn't miss the way Hawke's whole body drew up tight when Matty referred to him that way and I suspected it was a relatively new thing. I also suspected Hawke loved every second of it. "That's right," Hawke managed to get out, though his voice was heavy with emotion.

Matty looked at me triumphantly and I put up my hands. "Okay, you got me Professor X."

I felt my own chest constrict painfully as I took in Matty's small body and bald head. Logically I knew the little boy's treatment was progressing exactly as it should and he was responding well, but for all the good days he had, there were plenty of bad ones too where he was too sick to do anything but lay quietly in bed, sometimes in the arms of one of his fathers as they told him the superhero stories that he so loved.

I felt Hawke's eyes on me as I studied Matty, but I forced myself not to look at him. Taking this job had been the epitome of stupid. Because what had started out as the simple need to protect a little boy from an unseen threat had morphed into something so much more. I had stopped looking at Matty as just a little boy fighting for his life. And the men in his life…the men who'd banded together to become the family he needed…

I shook myself free of the path my brain was going down. Thoughts like that were exactly why I'd told Ronan I needed a break. A week to just get on my Harley and disappear.

I held out my fist and said to Matty, "Professor X, I'll see you next week." Matty smiled and bumped his small fist against mine.

I flashed Hawke a glance as I headed for the door and didn't miss the way he was watching me with a mix of curiosity and pity. Fucker was just too damn perceptive.

"Take care of yourself, Mav," Hawke said.

I ignored the uncomfortable sensation in my chest as I gave him a quick nod and left the room. I hated the anxiety that overcame me as I stopped next to Dante Thorne, the man who would be guarding Matty in my absence. I needed to get the fuck away from this place so I could regroup. But I couldn't make sense of the feeling that I was already exactly where I was supposed to be and that walking away wouldn't solve anything.

"Keep them safe," I murmured to Dante.

I'd never worked with the young man who was leaning casually against the wall next to the door, one leg raised so that his foot was resting flat against the wall. He was a relatively new addition to Ronan's team and while he'd already garnered a reputation for his cocksure attitude, he'd impressed more than a couple members of the team with his ability to sense when things were off. And while he looked like he didn't have a care in the world, I knew he was aware of every single thing that was going on around us .

"Yep," was all he said.

I started to walk past him, but thought better of it and turned to face him. "The volunteer who visits the kids every day…"

"You mean the guy with the tight ass?" Dante drawled.

I ground my teeth together in irritation, but didn't take the bait. Besides being an arrogant son of a bitch, Dante Thorne was also a horny one and he'd fuck anyone and everyone, regardless of whether they had a dick or pussy between their legs. "You seen him today?"

"No. Shame too, ‘cause he's the highlight of my day." Dante flashed me a wide smile, but his eyes quickly shifted back to scanning the hallway. I ignored the urge to punch him and made my way towards the hallway that would ultimately get me to the parking garage.

In the week since Eli had been attacked, I'd seen him every day, but he hadn't spoken a word to me, nor I to him. We'd gone back to the roles we'd had before I'd found him that day in the stairwell. It was the fact that he hadn't tried to interact with me even once in the days following the attack that had kept me from calling our tech guy, or girl rather, to get some more information on Eli in the hopes that I could figure out who had assaulted him. Just like with Matty, I'd realized that I'd started to get too caught up in the young man's life. Because instead of going home every night after my shift at the hospital ended, I found myself driving past the young man's apartment. What the hell I expected to see, I had no idea.

That was how I'd known I was getting in way too deep.

Eli Galvez wasn't my problem. Matty Travers wasn't my problem. One was a former distraction, the other was my job.

Simple.

Some badass assassin I was…I couldn't even get my shit together long enough to be honest with myself. A week exploring the Pacific Coast Highway on my Harley would fix that. Hell, if I was really lucky, Ronan would call me up and tell me he had another job for me and I wouldn't have to set foot back in Seattle again.

I was letting the prospect of not having to see Eli again roll through me as I reached the stairwell door that led to the parking garage floors, but the moment I pushed the heavy door open, the shimmer of disappointment that had started to take root somewhere deep inside of me fled.

Because sitting on the very top step was Eli.

He turned the second I entered the stairwell and then he was climbing to his feet. And although his face was still an ugly purple color, I was pleased to see that his lip was healed and from the normal way he was holding his arm, I suspected his wrist was better as well.

"Hi," Eli said nervously.

My body was already reacting to being so physically close to the younger man, but it was my insides that were churning with excitement.

"Hi."

We both stood there in a tangle of awkward silence until I finally said, "Did you need something?"

"Um…yeah, can I talk to you about something?"

Eli was still clearly afraid of me, but since it was the most he'd ever spoken to me, I was very curious to hear what he had to say. "Sure," I said and I began walking down the stairs. Eli fell in step next to me, but he didn't actually speak and I figured he was trying to work up the nerve. It wasn't until I pushed the door open leading to the floor where my Harley was parked that Eli finally opened his mouth.

"I was wondering…do you know how to fight?"

"Fight?" I asked as I approached my Harley. I noticed that Eli's car was parked right next to my bike and I wondered if he'd figured it was mine and parked there intentionally. We were parked in the farthest corner of the garage so there was little foot traffic.

"Yeah…I mean, like do you know self-defense stuff?"

My body tensed up at that and I turned to face him. "Did something happen?" I asked.

Eli began chewing on his lower lip and before I could even think about what I was doing, I reached up with my fingers to free his tender flesh from the hold his teeth had on it. Eli stilled at my touch and then closed his eyes like he was in pain. But I knew it wasn't pain that he was feeling.

Fuck, why couldn't I get a grip around this guy?

I dropped my hand and took a step back so there would be more room between us. Maybe then I wouldn't fucking reach for him again.

"So do you?" Eli asked, ignoring my question.

"Yes," I finally said. "I know some self-defense moves." I knew a lot more than some , but I didn't say that.

"Would you teach me?" Eli asked in a rush.

"Eli, if that guy is still bothering you-"

"Please, Mav, can you teach me or not?" Eli interrupted. The desperation coming off of him was palpable. "I…I can pay you."

I studied him long and hard before finally saying, "I don't want your money." If teaching him some moves was the only way to get him to trust me, then I'd do it in a heartbeat. Because he was clearly still in trouble.

I expected my statement about not wanting his money would have relaxed him somewhat, but it just made him more tense. That lasted only for a few seconds before there was such a profound shift in him that I was momentarily speechless. His fear disappeared just like that and his whole body went lax. And then he scanned the garage before reaching for my hand.

I was so caught off guard by him initiating the contact, that I barely noticed as he led me past his car. "Eli-" I managed to say, but then he was maneuvering me behind a foundation column next to his car and he released my hand. There was a light hanging a few feet over, but it wasn't working correctly because it would flicker now and then, but otherwise left the spot we were standing in bathed in shadows.

I was about to ask what the hell was going on when Eli's hand stroked over my groin. I bit back a curse as his fingers brushed over my growing erection and when he gripped me through my pants, I actually did moan and dropped my head back against the pillar behind me. Eli's hand held me for several long seconds before sliding down to search out my balls. His touch was driving me insane with need so when I felt the button on my pants open a moment later, I didn't protest. The zipper sounded obscenely loud in the garage, but my groan as Eli's hand snaked into my pants to play with me had to be a thousand times louder.

"Fuck," I growled when Eli pulled my cock out of my pants and began stroking me. His eyes were on my rigid shaft so I dropped my hand to his head and threaded my fingers through his hair. He let me maneuver his head so that he was looking up at me, but all my desire was snuffed out when I saw his eyes.

Because there was nothing there. Not one goddamn thing. Not desire, not pleasure, not fear…nothing.

What the fuck was going on?

My insides went cold as Eli tugged free of my hold and dropped to his knees. While my cock was still responding to the young man at my feet, the rest of me was still trying to process what was happening. I managed to come to my senses just as Eli leaned forward to take me in his mouth and I bent down and grabbed him by both of his upper arms and pulled him to his feet.

"No," I said firmly. "Not like this."

Eli's dead eyes held mine and it wasn't until I reached up and ran my fingers down his cheek and whispered his name that he finally seemed to snap out of whatever daze he'd been in. Life rushed back into his gaze and he looked down at my cock which was still hanging out of my pants. He let out a startled gasp and took several big steps back from me. I used the time to tuck myself back in, but I was still drawing the zipper up when Eli bolted.

"Eli-" I shouted as I followed him. I reached him just as he was opening his car door and I slammed it closed before he could get in. I pinned his body with mine to keep him from trying to get away.

"I'm sorry!" he cried. "I'm sorry!"

"Eli, it's okay," I said as I reached up to grab his arms. He was wearing a short sleeved shirt so I was able to touch his skin which actually felt cold and clammy. He was shaking like crazy and I could hear sobs rattling deep down in his throat. I sensed he was on the verge of a full blown panic attack so I wrapped my arms around him and dropped my mouth to his ear .

"Shhhh, just take deep breaths, okay?"

My words seemed to have little effect on him and he kept repeating over and over that he was sorry. Something inside of me took over as Eli's distress grew and I began murmuring words that I had learned long ago…before I'd realized that they didn't apply to me.

I kept repeating them over and over until I felt Eli start sucking in deep breaths. We were leaning heavily against his car door, my body holding his in place, surrounding him. His shaking eased as his breathing slowed, but he was still trembling. The sobs had stopped, but I could feel moisture dropping down onto my forearm which was still braced across his upper chest. I let the words trail off, but instead of releasing Eli, I leaned down to brush my lips across the back of his neck. His skin was soft and much warmer than it had been a few minutes earlier and while he was still taking deep breaths, they weren't as agonized as they'd been.

We stood there for several long minutes and as the adrenaline in my system began to wane, I realized how good Eli's body felt pressed up against mine. At some point he'd lifted one of his hands to close over the arm I had around his chest, but he wasn't trying to get free of me…it was more like he was holding on. Like I'd become his anchor. It wasn't something I should have encouraged, but I couldn't force myself to release him.

"I…I need to go," Eli said shakily, though he didn't release his hold on me even when I loosened my grip just a little.

"We need to talk about what just happened," I said, but even before I finished the statement, Eli was shaking his head.

"It was a mistake. I'm sorry."

"Eli-"

"Please, Mav…please just let me go."

I hated how frail and uneven his voice sounded. While he wasn't in a near panic like he'd been before, he was definitely still on the edge. I reluctantly let him go and stepped back. The second I did, he was opening the car door. He whispered yet another apology to me and then he was climbing in his car. It sputtered to life a moment later, but Eli didn't look at me even once as he pulled out of the space and drove off. I wanted to follow him and demand that he tell me what the hell had just happened, but I knew it wouldn't get me anywhere. My plans to leave town forgotten, I pulled out my phone and started to dial the number for Daisy, the young woman Ronan had hired to handle the IT side of the underground vigilante organization he ran and that I'd been working for for nearly five years. But as I was about to hit the button to initiate the call, I felt a rush of impatience go through me and I put my phone away and climbed onto my bike. It would take Daisy hours to get the information I wanted and that was assuming she didn't have any high priority cases she was working on. And it was more than likely that any information she shared with me would be shared with Ronan as well. Since he knew Eli, he'd want an explanation as to why I was digging into the young man's past.

It was something I wasn't ready to try to explain…not to Ronan and not to myself.