23. Cole

Chapter 23

Cole

Iopened my eyes to the bright lights of the ambulance bay at the back of the hospital.

Amber opened the doors, and I sat up. “I am not being wheeled in there. I can fucking walk.”

She grinned. “I wasn’t even going to ask. Let’s go.”

Tate avoided her eyes and got out before me to head through the doors toward the waiting room.

I followed her through the white halls and straight into a curtained-off space in the emergency room.

“It must be a slow night,” I observed. The place was practically empty.

“I called Dr. Taylor to meet you here. I heard—I know you’ve been having a hard time lately, Cole. Your mom and I still talk sometimes, and I uh—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make this awkward⁠—”

“It’s okay, thank you. I appreciate it, and I’m sorry for acting like a dick⁠—”

“No apologies, I get it. You’re in pain. You’re frustrated. No worries, Cole. Take care of yourself.” She hugged me quickly and then took off.

I sat at the edge of the bed to wait for the doctor. A few minutes later, Tate popped his head in.

“Is the coast clear?”

“Yeah, she left. Someday, you’ll have to let me know what happened between you because I do not understand this one bit. She still talks to Mom. Did you know that?”

“Yeah, I know. But today is not someday, and I don’t want to discuss it.”

“Fair enough. I’m not pushy like you, so I’ll let it go. But I am here for you whenever you want to unload.”

“Touché, man. I hear you, and I know you’ll be here for me. So, what are we supposed to do, fucking sit here and wait without talking?”

He flipped his phone to check his messages after the notification went off. “Actually⁠—”

“Cole! Oh my god.” It was Madi.

Her cheeks were streaked with tears. She was wearing slippers on her feet and purple and white polka-dotted pajamas. I could hear her taking in deep breaths, trying to stop crying, as she power-walked her way toward me with her hair flopping around in a lopsided bun on top of her head.

She was fucking gorgeous. Everything flew out of my head the second I saw her. But she looked so worried, and I hated that I was the cause of it.

“Yeah, so, I texted her from the ambulance,” Tate whispered. “I thought it was the right thing to do. She wouldn’t be happy if she found out tomorrow. Don’t you think?”

I shot him a glare. The last thing I needed was to make her worry about me—the fewer people who know about this, the better.

“Madi, I’m okay. I promise. It’s just a little burn.” I shifted to the side so she could see my arm. “See? No big deal.”

“It looks awful!” she cried. “It’s so red. How bad does it hurt? What can I do to help? Where are the kids?”

“They’re at my parents’ place. They do a grandkid sleepover once or twice a month. They’re okay.”

“That’s good. Can I hug you? Will it hurt?”

“No, it won’t hurt me. Come here.” I held my good arm out, reaching for her. I pulled her close when she stepped into me.

“I’m sorry, I’m crying. I was worried all the way here.”

“I’ll let you two be alone,” Tate said. He got up and swiped the curtains closed.

“I promise I’m okay. Shh. Please, baby, don’t cry over me. I’ll be fine. This is just precautionary. I should have gone home. I know how to treat a burn myself⁠—”

“Oh god.” She burst into fresh tears. “You shouldn’t have to take care of something like this alone. And ignore my crying. I’m not a drama queen. I don’t want you to think I’m making this about me. Big feelings make me cry, that’s it. I’m in control, I swear. Can I do anything for you?”

“Come here. Just let me hold you. That’s all I need.” I pulled her into my chest and rubbed circles over her back as I kissed the top of her head to the side of the bun. “Were you asleep when Tate texted?”

“Yeah. I rushed over here without thinking.” She took a step back and shook her head. “Oh no, I’m still in my pajamas.” Her lip trembled, and she bit it to gain control.

I looked her up and down. “Yeah, and you’re fucking adorable.”

She let out a startled giggle. “No, I’m—a mess. I mean, I didn’t think of this—you getting hurt.” Big brown eyes met mine and held. As she spoke, I cupped her cheeks and brushed her tears away with my thumbs. “I know you’re a firefighter, in theory. And in practice, too, I guess. From in the tree with Kenny. I didn’t think of what it would be like to worry about you like this. Have you ever been injured before?”

“Yeah,” I murmured. “But nothing too serious. Nothing to be afraid of.” My hands drifted to her waist, and she shivered. I hugged her close, and she rubbed my back, soothing me even though I had intended to be the one to soothe her.

“Okay, that’s good to know.” Her words were muffled in my chest. “Will the doctor be here soon?”

“He’s supposed to be.”

She lifted her face with her chin on my chest. “I missed you.” Her voice was like a wisp of air between us. Soft. Sweet.

I touched my forehead to hers. I fucking missed her too. So much.

But I didn’t say it.

I should have said it.

I kissed her instead, touching my lips to that gorgeous mouth of hers, groaning when her lips parted beneath mine. Her arms wrapped around my sides as she drifted her hands up and down my back, and I went out of my head. The pain in my arm was almost forgotten as I got lost in her.

I tried to ground myself on what was real, to find all the reasons why this couldn’t be, why I couldn’t have her, shouldn’t want her. But at this moment, I couldn’t think of a single one.

She broke the kiss. “Do you need anything? A coffee? Coke? I want to go splash water on my face, and I kinda have to pee.” She grinned at me sheepishly and traced a finger down the center of my chest. “I could bring something back for you if you like. There is a vending machine right by the restrooms. I passed it on my way back here.”

“I’d love a Coke. Caffeine sounds amazing, but coffee sounds too hot. I’ve been up for too many hours to count by now.”

“You got it.” She kissed me quickly and caressed my cheek with a smile. “I’ll be right back.”

I watched her walk away, her slippers slapping adorably on the floor and her bun wobbling until she crossed through the big double doors leading out of the emergency room. Then I swiped the curtains shut again. I didn’t want to talk to anyone else.

My arm throbbed lightly; it was annoying but tolerable. Which I knew was a good sign. If it didn’t hurt at all, I’d be in trouble.

With a sigh, I reclined back on the bed, fluffing the pillow behind my head and closing my eyes against the bright white glare of the overhead light. This had been a long fucking day.

All I wanted was to go home and crawl into bed with a few ibuprofen and a cold water bottle for my arm. And maybe I wanted Madi to crawl in with me so I could hold her as I slept. Was that so bad? To want her?

Didn’t I deserve to be happy too?

I sat up, startled, as the curtain opened. One of the little hooks popped off from how hard it was pulled.

It was Sherry. Once she caught sight of me in the bed, she drew them closed with a dramatic flourish.

“What happened?” She eyed me up and down derisively. “You look fine to me.”

“What are you doing here, Sherry?”

“The hospital called me. I’m still on all the emergency contact forms from the station.”

I heaved out a sigh. “Yeah, sorry about that. I’ll have to take care of it when I return to work.”

“No worries. It’s fine. Where are the kids? Are they with her?”

“Her? If you’re referring to Madi, then no, they’re at my parents’ place. You should know that. They do it every month, remember?”

“Yeah, whatever. Okay, good. I want to talk to her if you decide to get serious. Or are you already serious about her?”

“Good? What is that supposed to mean? We’re not serious. We’re just starting, seeing where things go. What I do and who I do it with is none of your business. Are you out of your mind?”

Her eyebrows raised to her hairline as she studied my face, waiting for my reaction. “She’s a bit on the young side, don’t you think? I don’t know how I feel about them being with her.”

“How you feel? Oh, that’s rich coming from you. You didn’t bother to consult me when you started screwing Todd behind my back, in our bed, for that matter. And neither of you bothered to think about how the kids would feel after you ran off and got married.”

“Please. Give me a break. Todd isn’t some twenty-something little thing like she is. He’s already a father. He knows how to be a parent⁠—”

“And you’re both doing so well with the whole parenting thing, right? Todd won’t stop putting his kids in front of ours so you can spend some time fixing your relationship with Nat and Ev. How many brunches have you canceled with them? Our kids matter, too, Sherry. They need you.”

“That’s low, Cole. I’m doing my best to try and balance⁠—”

“No. Stop it. And for the record, Madi is thirty. And don’t worry, with the way my life is going right now, I’ll never get fucking married again. It’s not worth the pain-in-the-ass heartache when it all goes to hell. Can you please leave? This is the last thing I need right now. I’ll get your name off the forms as soon as I’m done here.”

“Now that I know you’re okay, I’ll go. I’m sorry. I didn’t come here to fight with you.”

“And yet that’s all we seem to do⁠—”

“Cole. How are we feeling tonight?” With perfect timing, Dr. Taylor drew the curtains aside, fixing the hook that had popped off as he stepped through with Madi and Tate directly behind him.

Fucking great.How much had she heard?

“Always a pleasure, Sherry.” Tate beamed at her as she walked around them to leave.

“Whatever you say, Tate,” she muttered.

Madi’s eyes were wide with alarm. “Are you okay?” she mouthed.

I nodded as Dr. Taylor examined my arm.

“I’ll just leave this here.” She passed a can of Coke to Tate. “I’ll, um, get out of your hair so you can talk to the doctor. Text me if you need anything.” I didn’t miss the tears shimmering in her eyes, but there wasn’t anything I could do now. “Bye, Cole.”

“I’ll call you when I’m home.” She didn’t answer. She was already halfway to the exit. “Madi—” I shouted. “I’ll call you.”

She waved over her shoulder, and I couldn’t make out her answer.

Dr. Taylor excused himself to grab some supplies that he needed. I wasn’t paying attention and, at this point, didn’t give a shit about my arm, so I had no idea what he was getting.

“Should I call her now?” I asked Tate.

“She was standing outside the curtain listening to you and Sherry. Dr. Taylor and I got here at the same time. What were you talking about with her? Was it anything that would set Madi off? Or upset her somehow?”

“I said something about not getting married ever again, I think? I don’t remember. Sherry was pushing all the usual buttons. She inferred that Madi was too young for me, and she was worried about the kids being around her.”

“Jesus. She has a lot of nerve. Okay, that doesn’t seem like a big deal. If she heard everything, she’s bound to understand you were frustrated. Call her tomorrow. You need to get that arm taken care of. And you need to go home and crash.”

“Okay. Good thinking. I’m exhausted. Talking would be pointless now, anyway. I’ll probably end up saying something stupid.”

He smacked my good shoulder. “I’ll take you home when you’re done. I got a couple of the guys to drive my car over.”

“Thanks, man.”

“It’s gonna be okay.”

“I hope so. But I don’t have any energy left to think about it right now.”