4. Chapter 4

Chapter four

PAVAL

The ride to my parents' is silent but I keep looking over at Tia, trying to understand what is going on in her head. It's driving me mad that I can't read her thoughts or that she isn't the open book she used to be. I study her as best I can while keeping my eyes on the road, running through all of the changes that I can pinpoint.

She's wearing a pair of bronze glasses, those round ones that accentuate her eyes but those aren't new. Tia pulled her hair back into a ponytail a few minutes ago and while it makes me want to nibble on her exposed jaw, that isn't it either. There's a certain darkness to her expression but it doesn't have to do with her mother.

Is it me? We've never officially clarified our relationship. Maybe she no longer wants me and I've been coercing her into something she hates. I can protect her without touching her, right?

My searching continues, Tia resting against the window, her lids closed. She's not as peaceful as she usually is, her cheek twitching every so slightly. That's when I catch onto the faint purple tint to her skin just below her eye as we pull into my parents' driveway.

Did someone hit my Tia?

Why didn't she say anything?

I run through all of the instances she has deviated from the algorithm I constructed and I don't remember this happening. Tia jolts forward, rubbing at her eyes and stretching. "Here already? Damn. I didn't mean to fall asleep." It takes everything in me not to mention the bruise but by the time I open her door, I can't help myself as I caress her cheek, needing to touch it.

She winces and then catches my hand, pressing a kiss to my palm. "Don't. We'll talk about it later, okay?"

This beautiful woman told me she was okay but the purpling bruise beneath a thin layer of makeup says otherwise. A mixture of fear and anger flashes through her expression before settling on a calm and collected version that I know is fake. "Who did that to you, Tia?" She's still holding my hand in hers, keeping me from touching her.

"Pav, please. Just let it go and don't fucking mention it to your fathers either. I don't need someone ending up dead in my honor. I can handle myself." She kisses my palm again before pushing herself from the passenger seat. I immediately rip my sweatshirt off and pull it over her head, still searching for any reason to believe that she's okay. Tia has never asked me to keep things from my fathers before. This must be serious. "Pav, I know that look. You don't need to understand my reasoning and this isn't an outlier or anything else. You have a heart of gold but the restraint of a beast."

"Tia," I begin as she steps around me, heading for the door.

She whirls around, fury in those hazel eyes as she jabs me in the chest. "No. Leave. It. Be. I mean it, Pav. I'm not in trouble. No one is hurting me. I'm okay. If I knew you were going to be this anal about it, I would have put more makeup on."

I don't like the fact that Tia would hide her pain from me. But if she's been hiding this bruise, that means she might be hiding other things. I don't have time to dwell on it as the front door swings open, Rhys' eyes widening at Tia's presence. He ignores me, dragging her into a huge hug before disappearing with her into the kitchen. His excited chatter will keep her occupied for hours if she lets him, a chuckle falling from my lips as I step inside.

"I guess I'm just chopped liver then," I joke, my father peeking back out of the kitchen.

Rhys grins. "No, but I see you all the time. My niece, however, is precious. Are you feeding her?"

"I'm not her keeper, Dad ." Although, I'm now worried about that too. Is Tia eating? Two pairs of arms strangle me into a hug, disrupting my train of thought. A third presence steps up in front of me, Valentyn chuckling at my shocked expression. Even in his fifties, he's still retained all of his bulk, his wide shoulders making him the size of at least two of me.

He opens his arms and I step into them, not realizing how much I truly needed this hug. "Stress from the exams getting to you?" Valentyn murmurs and I just shake my head as he releases me, my fathers directing me to the couch where we spend most of our dinners. "I see you brought Tia."

Dmitri leans forward from his perch on the coffee table. "You finally confess to her or are you still doing that obsessive shit?"

I glare at him, wondering where he thinks I got that ‘shit' from. "Blame Rhys for my obsessive behaviors and you three for that matter." Having fathers who lived their entire lives carrying out dangerous jobs only to truly give it up for Rhys who they fell in love with after a few days? And then Rhys who is so obsessed with numbers, that he forgets to eat at times? Miss me with that hypocritical bullshit. "And it's not an obsession. I just understand her better when everything makes sense." They wouldn't understand that the chaos confuses me.

Where Rhys sees numbers in everything, I see order and disorder. I prefer order.

Gianni pats my shoulder, taking my attention off the other two who definitely think my infatuation with Tia has run its course. I used to talk about her all the time up until my first year of graduate school but even I knew that my behaviors were over the top. "Paval, what's going on? Despite the jokes, I can see something is bothering you. I also know that Tia wouldn't have come unless something was wrong."

"I don't know what's wrong. I think she's in trouble." No, I know she's in trouble. Tia isn't stupid. She wouldn't have let herself get hit which means she thinks she deserved it or wasn't expecting it. I'm not sure which situation pains me more. When all three of my fathers sit forward, suddenly intrigued, I know I've started something. I wave my hands in front of me, swallowing the laugh on the tip of my tongue. "You don't need to step in. It's just something I've noticed but I don't know how to help her. I don't even know if I can. She doesn't want me to do anything but the light in her eyes is gone."

My eyes unfocus as I remember the expression on her face as she got out of the car. This doesn't fit in the little box I've created for her and it's freaking me out.

"You've got it bad," Dmitri muses. "Paval, I don't have to remind you that people are unpredictable. Even with all of your equations, you're not going to be able to predict them with any reasonable degree of certainty."

My fathers have reminded me of that one fact several times but I refuse to believe it. Valentyn sighs, running a hand down his face as he crouches at my side. With all of them hovering in my space, I know this conversation has turned serious. "Paval, look at me. I need you to tell me everything that you think is going on so that maybe we can help you understand it. I absolutely love the way you see the world—just like Rhys does, but at times you are so zoned into the finer details, that you miss the bigger picture."

"Tia is my everything," I confess. She always has been. From the moment I saw her, I was obsessed with her. But it's very obvious to me that what I bring to the table will dim her shine. My need for just a twinge of violence to take the edge off is exactly what a budding lawyer doesn't need. "But I can't be hers. I refuse to be. Trauma brought us together but it reminds her every day why we met. She still blames herself for her mother and I can't make that go away by being around her."

Valentyn huffs out another sigh, annoyed at the situation. "It's not your job to make it go away, Paval but I know how difficult it can be. Rhys still struggles at times but he chose us."

It's my turn to laugh now. "I think you three kind of barged into his life and he didn't have a choice when you whisked him away to Paris." Valentyn scowls at the same time Gianni lightly jostles my arm. That's not how that scenario played out. From the stories told on occasion, it was a much more terrifying time when my fathers weren't sure we'd all survive. Rhys very much chose the three men surrounding me and the love between them is as strong as it ever was.

The temperature drops a few degrees as Valentyn takes a seat beside me and now I realize that Rhys stealing Tia away wasn't just because he missed her. "Paval, Tia will learn when she's ready but I want you to know that her mother is getting out on probation next week. Sit down, son. Breathe. There is absolutely nothing you can do. I'm not sure who she paid off or if her lawyer was just that fucking good at negotiating. Either way, there's a protection order in place. Ada knows that any physical contact with her daughter could land her back in jail."

"That's not enough," I grunt out. I've done everything I can to protect Tia and I'm failing. Someone hit her. She's in dark corners with big men that are furious with her. And now this? I'm not sure I can protect her this time. Ada is a loose cannon. My fathers had no idea Ada was behind the conspiracies twenty years ago until it was too late. What she's capable of now to get back the one thing she wants is beyond my comprehension. "I don't… I won't be enough."

This helpless feeling is crushing. Tia will never forgive herself if something happens again. She hasn't even forgiven herself now. Gianni squeezes my shoulder, dragging me back to the reality of this moment. "Paval, you are enough. You are always enough. Tia will appreciate everything you've done for her, I know that much."

Giggles peel from the kitchen, Tia and Rhys exiting into the living room with plates, utensils, and a large pot of what smells like chili. Gianni climbs over the back of the couch as I've seen him do a billion times, extracting the pan from Rhys' hand and kissing his cheek. My dorky father blushes as he comes to sit on the floor by the coffee table, Valentyn and Dmitri also offering kisses and caresses that have me silently gagging.

Do I want that kind of love in my life? Yes. Do I need to see my fathers doing it? No. No, I do not.

Tia plops down beside me, placing the plates beside the pot. "You okay?" Her face is significantly brighter than it was a few moments ago. "Paval," she whispers against my ear, sending shivers down my back. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I'm good," I croak out before reaching for a plate.