Chapter 24

Twenty-Four

Nick

A ustin was giving an interview to local news media outlets. Our family’s story would be everywhere. It’s all anyone would be talking about. Already, the interview was being teased. The break-ins had gone on for so long and affected so many local businesses that it generated a lot of interest.

Everyone wanted to know that they had the culprit behind bars so they could move on. So they could reassure locals and tourists alike they were safe walking downtown. I didn’t blame them, but I could just imagine the scrutiny once it aired.

Would people think Brody was a troublemaker like his father? Would they think I was the same? Would I be asked to step down from the coaching position?

I couldn’t risk it. I had to leave, even if it was only for a short time, to see if things blew over after the interview. I’d talked to the school counselor, and she said I could pull Brody and homeschool him. She thought it might be a good idea because the teasing at school was relentless.

I wanted to protect Brody, and I couldn’t do that in Annapolis with Austin calling the shots. I needed to remove us from his sphere.

Brody was at school today while I packed up the essentials and found a place to rent a few towns over for a month. It would be far enough away to hopefully avoid talk yet close enough we could attend baseball practices.

We were forced to take a break over the holidays from November through December anyway. Brody went back and forth on whether he wanted to leave Hunter and his other friends he’d known since kindergarten.

He was concerned about how our move would affect baseball. It was my job to make those hard decisions. I’d been talking to an attorney to discuss getting full custody, and even she was concerned that the negative publicity would prohibit my ability to go forward.

I felt stuck. I wasn’t sure there was any other solution but to leave. But every time I thought of not seeing Abby or Hunter, the weight on my chest intensified.

In the afternoon, when I was attempting to concentrate on work, I heard a knock at the door. I answered it, expecting it to be a delivery person or salesman. Instead, it was Ethan.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” I asked as I opened the door wider for him.

“I came to see how you were holding up.”

“Not great,” I said as he followed me into the kitchen.

“I figured. What’s Austin thinking?”

“He’s only thinking about himself as usual.”

“What are you going to do?” Ethan asked, his gaze scanning the stack of boxes for the first time. “Are you moving?”

“I’m looking into renting a house a couple of towns over.” I assumed Ethan would agree that that was the only solution. “Brody’s getting teased at school. They can’t seem to stop it with it being in the news every day.”

Ethan crossed his arms over his chest. “I get that, but what about baseball? Doesn’t Brody have friends here?”

“We can still go to baseball. Then we have that break in the winter anyway.”

“You don’t have any other reason to stay?” Ethan was merely curious, but I hesitated, and he caught it. “Are you seeing someone?”

“Not exactly. We had an arrangement, but now it’s over.” I was pretty sure I’d been clear about that on the phone with Abby the other night.

“What kind of arrangement?”

Suddenly hot, I moved around him to open the window above the sink. “You know, one that’s purely physical, where no one catches any feelings.”

“Friends with benefits? What are you? A teenager?”

Shame coursed through me. He was right. It was stupid and irresponsible to treat Abby like that. “I wanted more, but it was all she was willing to give.”

“And now?”

“I still want more, but she has too much baggage.” That was how I’d justified leaving to myself. Abby wouldn’t come around. She wasn’t going to get over her ex. The wounds were too deep. I didn’t stand a chance. And who could blame her? I’d always felt unworthy of her to begin with.

“Who are we talking about?”

I shifted on my feet. “Abby, the wedding photographer. We hooked up the night of your wedding. I never thought I’d see her again.”

“She’s a single mom.”

“She didn’t tell me that, or I never would have gotten involved. It was supposed to be a night we could let go.”

“You picked it back up with her when you moved here?”

“Something like that. It was all she was willing to give. It was enough until it wasn’t.”

Ethan’s eyes narrowed on me. “You caught feelings.”

“Like I said, it doesn’t matter. Abby didn’t. It takes two to have a relationship.”

“Did you talk to her about it?”

“I told her about the situation with Austin and how we needed to get out of here.”

“But not how you felt?”

“Those were the rules she set.” Even as I said it, I knew it was a cop-out. I was using our arrangement to hide out.

“You know those rules were bullshit.”

I chuckled without any humor. “I knew I’d get hurt. I’d want more. But I didn’t care. I did it anyway.”

“Are you planning on talking to her before you leave?”

“We already discussed things over the phone.” Talking to her, seeing her in person, wouldn’t help. It would only make things worse.

“I don’t like that you’re leaving. I liked having you in town.”

“I liked living close too. I didn’t think I’d ever move back here. But, as usual, I have to put up with Austin’s shit. I can’t escape it here.”

“I get that. Have you gone to see him?”

“Brody wants to, but I don’t know. What would it change?”

“You could tell him how he’s hurting Brody. And that he needs to stop or he’s going to lose him all together.”

Would Brody eventually resent Austin if we needed to move? “Austin never cared much about how his actions hurt others.”

“Maybe. But we’re talking about his son here.”

I ran my hand through my hair. “The one he left at home alone while he robbed stores.”

“He wasn’t the best parent, but maybe he’ll want to help if he sees how his actions are hurting Brody.”

“You might be right.” It was possible. Austin never cared about how his actions affected our parents or me. But maybe he had a soft spot for his son even if he wasn’t always there for him physically.

“It doesn’t hurt to try. You should talk to him before you go.”

I clenched my teeth. I hated the thought of seeing Austin in jail. “Brody said he wants to see him too. Will you go with me, so I can speak to him one on one?”

“Absolutely. I don’t want you to go, but you need to do what you think is best for you and Brody. Only you can decide that.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it. This parenting thing doesn’t get easier, does it?”

He laughed. “Not at all. Have you thought about having kids of your own?”

“I have my hands full with Brody right now. I can’t even handle a relationship with a woman, much less adding to my family.” But the thought of having a baby with Abby caused everything in me to soften.

After how I talked to her on the phone the other night, I’d doubt she was even interested in talking. It was possible I triggered her with my talk of leaving. I wasn’t thinking clearly. Worst-case scenarios were swirling in my head.

Was it a bad idea to move away even if it was only for a few months to give things time to settle down? Or was I running away again?

Ethan asked if there was anyone worth staying for—and Abby and Hunter were worth fighting for. But what if staying was bad for Brody?

Thankfully, Ethan asked if I wanted to play video games. So I agreed, needing a few hours of mindless nothing. I didn’t know what to do about Abby, Hunter, and Brody. All of them needed me to make the right decision. Whatever I decided, I might hurt one of them. Hunter and Abby didn’t want to be left again. Brody didn’t want to be subjected to mean words and teasing.

I tried to push aside the anxiety, but it crept in.

Eventually, Ethan dropped his controller on the coffee table. “You’re not paying attention.”

I ran my fingers through my hair. “I hoped I could forget about everything for a couple of hours.”

“You can’t get it out of your mind.”

“Whatever I decide, someone’s going to be hurt.”

“What do you want to do? You quit baseball because Austin needed you. You moved because Brody needed you. What is it that you need?”

I needed to feel safe and secure. I needed to stay in one place. “I don’t think I want to move. I like living in one place. I like the idea of permanency. I like the friends I’ve met here.” I loved Abby and Hunter.

“Then you have your answer. You stay here and make it work.”

“But at what cost? Brody getting teased at school. Feeling less than as I did because of Austin’s poor choices.”

“Hopefully, Austin’s case is wrapped up soon, and he’s sent away to prison farther away.”

Austin was only being held in the detention center pending trial, and I didn’t see how he escaped with a not guilty verdict.

“Who knows how long that will take. You know these things take time.”

“You get to decide how he affects you going forward. You are not Austin. You didn’t do anything wrong. If someone thinks you’re somehow to blame, then that’s on them.”

“That sounds fine for me, but I’m an adult. What about Brody?”

“Anything like this blows over. It doesn’t last forever. It’s not like Austin will be in town, drumming up drama forever. He’ll be gone. People will move on to something else, and with any luck, they’ll forget who Brody’s real father is because you’ll always be in his life.”

Goose bumps erupted over my skin. I liked the thought of being Brody’s dad or, at least, the guy in his life he could count on. “You really think people will move on?”

“It’s human nature. Things don’t go on forever. The thing that has lasting consequences are the decisions we make when something like this happens. We jump the gun, make a life-changing decision that can’t be undone. If we were more patient, the solution might be right there in front of us. The one that makes everyone happy.”

What he was saying sounded good. All I needed to do was take some time and see how things shook out. It might not be as bad as I thought. I sighed. “Okay.”

Ethan rested his elbows on his thighs. “So, you’ll think about it before you make any rash decisions?”

I nodded. “I’ll take my time.”

“And you’ll talk to Austin. See if you can diffuse things a bit?”

“I’ll give it a try, but I don’t hold out much hope of him seeing reason.”

Ethan stood, resting a hand on my shoulder. “I think things will work out.”

“I hope you’re right.” The alternative was like a weight on my chest. When I thought about leaving Annapolis, Hunter, and Abby, it rested heavier, crushing my sternum, stealing my breath.

I stood and walked him to the door.

“You’re doing the right thing by considering all the angles. Brody will appreciate what you’ve done for him. Maybe not in the moment, but eventually, he’ll see what Austin was to him and what you are.”

“I’m just there for him.”

“Exactly. You’re a billion times better for him than Austin ever was.”

I let Ethan’s words roll around in my head long after he was gone. Was I doing the right thing by waiting to see how things would play out?

When Brody came home, I broached the idea of him seeing his dad soon. He was on board because he’d asked before, but he didn’t truly understand what he was getting into. I explained what it would be like to visit him in jail, the guards, security, locked doors. I wanted him to be fully prepared when he walked through those doors.

I think Brody just needed to see that his dad was okay. Without knowing, he worried about him. I wanted to alleviate his concern.

But I wanted to talk to Austin more. He needed to see how his actions hurt his son. How talking to the media would be terrible for Brody.

I’d appeal to him as the father of a child who needed him to look out for him too. Sure, he couldn’t physically be there, but his actions still affected his son. He had to listen. If he didn’t, I wasn’t sure I could be patient like Ethan suggested.

I was afraid I’d get the fight-or-flight impulse, pack up our things, and leave. Protecting Brody was so ingrained in me, but I had more people to consider now. I had Abby and Hunter, and they needed me too.