Chapter 8

Kellan

A fter I walked away from her in the cemetery, I knew the few hours I spent with her weren't enough. I shouldn't have involved myself in the way I did. I should have apologized for disturbing her and walked away, but she was just too hard to resist. And after I tasted her, I needed more.

She went back to her apartment and fell asleep. When I popped in to check on her, she was clearly in the midst of a nightmare. I had to invade her dreams to ensure she was okay. I don't want my pet suffering, even in her unconscious state, if I can help it. I'm not sure if it goes against the rules, but I've found myself wanting to break the rules more and more with her. Technically, dreams are not reality, so they don't count—a pleasant loophole.

I'm so glad I did, too. The way she came apart on my cock was unlike anything I've ever experienced. I only wish that it could have been in real life and not in a dream. Something about her thinking of our first time as a dream doesn't sit well with me.

I want her to know she belongs to me. My sweet pet who comes so beautifully. I want to make her pussy squeeze my cock as I fill all of her holes as often as possible. She loves being degraded, and I'm happy to oblige. I shake my head, remembering the sequence of events and vowing to find a way to feel her in that way again. It's a new day, and I'm sure she will wake up more than satisfied.

I've been neglecting my duties, and I've had so much to catch up on this morning. For the first time, I wonder what would happen if I didn't show up to guide the souls to my realm. Would someone show up in my absence? Would they find their own way somehow?

All souls have a path they ultimately have to take. I wonder just how important my role in all of this truly is. I was expecting some sort of recourse for delaying the souls I was supposed to guide last night, but there was none. Due to my distraction, they were simply granted a few extra hours in the mortal world.

Lena is all I'm able to think about anymore. Even while working this morning, the only thing running through my mind was the way she placed her hand on my chest in her dream. I long for that touch in real life. Her hand is warm and soft, and I crave it.

She's changing me, and there's no going back to the being I was before her. I want to shield her from hurt and the pain. I want to be the shoulder she leans on, the place she runs to when things get tough. I want her to finally feel like she has something to look forward to for the first time in so long.

She doesn't need the blade to make her feel. I can do that for her. I just need to find a way to help her see it. I'll deal with the consequences of everything else along the way. I won't ever willingly let her feel alone again.

I take on my human form, dressed in a pair of blue jeans, a black long-sleeve shirt, and a pair of Converse, before heading toward campus. I want to stage this perfectly so we run into each other. She's not ready to know exactly how long I've been obsessing over her yet. Someday, I will confess everything to her, but not today.

I know the exact path she walks from her second to third class when she gets lunch. Today, I'm going to intercept her. Hopefully, she will agree to let me join her. The other students are still making comments about her here and there under their breath, and she pretends it doesn't bother her, but I can see the pain behind her eyes.

I shouldn't seek her out again. This is a dangerous game I'm playing. If I involve myself too much, it could interfere with her purpose, but I do it anyway. I walk from the corner of the building, placing myself directly in her path. She's just a few steps in front of me, getting ready to walk past.

"Kellan?" she calls out almost immediately.

I lock eyes with her and stop in my tracks, waiting for her to close the distance between us. Hearing my true name on her lips is the most glorious sound I think I've ever heard. I long to hear her say it over and over again.

"Lena?" I question. I have to make this appear to be an accident.

"What are the chances I run into you again so soon?"

"It's a smaller campus than you think," I say, not wanting to admit I've been waiting here for her and that this run-in wasn't exactly by chance. "How are you doing today?"

She glances around at all the people looking our way. They are curious. She's been keeping to herself since the video was released. Her breakup with Carson didn't go unnoticed. If anything, it brought even more attention to her during a time when she was trying to stay invisible.

I reach out to touch her arm reassuringly. "I don't care what they think."

Her eyes meet mine again, and time stops. It's just the two of us lost to the universe within one another. Her shoulders visibly relax, and she seems to breathe easier as a faint smile spreads across her face.

"Are you sure? They have a lot of opinions about me."

"The only opinion I care about is yours. I don't give a fuck about any of them," I reassure her, and it's the truth.

Fuck. Did I just say fuck? I've never felt the need to curse outside of my thoughts before, but it felt nice slipping off my tongue. She is transforming me into an entirely new being full of complex emotions and feelings. The Others will not be happy about this. The Others can fuck right off.

"Would you like to join me for lunch, or are you heading to class? You might not care what everyone thinks, but I've had enough stares this week to last a lifetime." She rubs the sides of her covered arms anxiously.

"Let's go grab something to eat. I have some time before I have anywhere to be."

I reach out my hand in front of her, prompting her to take it, and her breath hitches at the sight. She hesitates for a brief moment, looking up at me with eyes full of vulnerability as her chest rises and falls rapidly.

Nervousness fills me. What if she doesn't accept my gesture? Maybe she thought what she told me in the cemetery would scare me off or that I wasn't being sincere. I'm not sure how I would cope with her rejecting me. I give her a slight nod of reassurance, hoping that it will encourage her to trust me.

She intertwines her fingers with mine, and the moment we touch, everything around us changes. The grass looks greener. The sun shines brighter. The fresh smell of the air is more potent than ever. Chills run through me at the contact. I never want to let her go.

"I'm glad I ran into you," she confesses as I lead her to the dining hall.

Nobody else around us matters anymore. The only person she can see is me, and vice versa. Nothing can change the way the two of us feel. We still barely know each other, but we are made for one another.

"I'm glad, too," I admit.

Once we enter the dining hall, we grab our food and find a small booth in the corner of the room where we will have the least amount of prying eyes. I'm sure people are wondering who I am and if she is already slutting herself out to a new man .

Humans can't help but be curious, but it's none of their damn business. I would love to give them all finality in order to protect my pet from another demeaning word leaving their mouths. I can't do that, though. The Others would notice. I'm surprised they haven't shown themselves to me already.

I am almost positive spending the afternoon with Lena yesterday changed her path in one way or another. Kissing her definitely changed things. I'm grateful they haven't tried to interfere. Maybe they are waiting to see if I will do the right thing. The only right thing is for me to be with Lena.

The Others are the only beings who can change the outcome of the souls I am destined to collect and those in my realm. While I call them The Others, most people know them as God and the Devil. They are the only beings with the potential to override death.

I've never done anything that would draw their attention before because I've always been a neutral bystander. As of yesterday, in the graveyard with Lena, I have officially diverted from neutrality.

Soon enough, each of them will send their spokesperson to me in an attempt to get me back on the path I'm meant for. The problem with that is that Lena is now the only path I'm interested in. I'm sure some kind of punishment will ensue from it. My only hope is that I have enough time to figure out what to do before they send their lackeys my way.

She takes another bite of her sandwich, staring at me as I push around the pasta on my plate. We've been sitting here in silence, willing the other to start up the conversation first. Both of us long to be in one another's presence but also share the same difficulty of how to act in a social setting.

"You're staring." I grin.

"Maybe a little. You're nice to stare at, though."

"I'm glad I'm easy on the eyes." I grab my drink and take a sip. "What are you going to school for?"

"Business. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do when I got out of college. I figured a business degree would be the easiest option."

"You don't seem like the business type, no offense."

"I think my father would agree with that." She laughs.

"Your father?" This is the first time she's spoken about him to me. I'm curious what she will say. I know he has extremely high and unrealistic expectations for her.

"Yeah, he's all about business and money. He made sure to let me know that he had no plans to let me run his business. I mean, I'm still not entirely sure what he does, but it doesn't change the fact that I'll never be good enough for him."

"What do you mean?"

"He's always intended to marry me off so that he can pass his company along to his son-in-law. The only thing I've ever been good for, in his eyes, was ensuring the next generation of fucked up men."

"Your father sounds like an asshole."

"Yeah, he is. Anyway, him being so shitty fueled me. I want a business degree even more. I want to prove him wrong. I have no clue if I'll even use the degree, but even if I don't, it will be a nice little fuck you to my father."

"I like the way you think." I smile as she brings a bottle of water to her mouth. My breath catches when her tongue dips out to lick the few drops that wet her lips. "Your father is out of his mind if he doesn't realize your worth."

"Thank you for that. You're the first person to make me feel something good in a really long time. You seem to be the first person to see me for who I am, and you still barely know me."

Reassuringly, I reach my hand out and place it on top of hers.

"Does that sound completely insane? I swear I'm not ever like this with everyone. There's something about you that I feel drawn to," she confesses.

"That doesn't sound insane at all. I feel the same way. I've never felt an intense desire to be near someone until I laid eyes on you."

"It doesn't make any sense." She shakes her head in an attempt to rationalize the pull we feel toward one another.

"Not everything is supposed to make sense. Let's take it day by day and see how things go."

"Okay."

It's right there on the tip of my tongue. I'm so close to asking her to be mine, but I don't think she is ready for that yet. She is still confused, and I want her to find comfort in me, not fear me. I'll give her the space, for right now at least, to explore what these feelings mean. I know her mental health isn't the best, and I never want to pressure her .

She glances down at her phone and then back at me with wide eyes. "I'm so sorry to leave you this quickly, but I only have a few minutes before my next class. I didn't realize how long we've been here."

I smile at her. "It's okay. Get to class. We can finish talking another time."

"How will I get a hold of you? " She stands and gathers her things to throw away in the nearby trash can.

"I'm sure we will run into each other, but we can plan to meet at this time every day if that helps. You never have to eat lunch alone again."

"That sounds perfect."

She goes to step away from the table, but I reach out to grab her arm one last time before she goes. "I'll see you tomorrow, Lena."

"See you tomorrow, Kellan," she says, and I lean down to kiss her on the cheek, watching the pink hue fill them.

As she leaves to go to her last class of the day, I feel an emptiness overtaking me. It's as though she is solely responsible for every piece of life blooming inside me. Without her, I am simply nothing, nobody, death. This one woman makes me feel like I am somebody.

She gives life to death. My entire being begins and ends with her.

I find myself wondering what I'm going to do when my time with her ultimately runs out. We are on a clock, and time is not on our side. I can't keep her. I remind myself, but I sure as fuck will find a way to change this. My perfect pet. She feels the same way toward me. I just know it. I'll find an exception so she can stay with me forever. With that final thought, I disappear to perform the day's duties I have been neglecting.