Chapter 27

27

Drak

Secluding myself with L'ore in the control room, I pretend that I am paying more attention to our flight path than I truly am. My body aches like I have been in a long and hard sparring match. I wish that I was tired so that I may sleep and ignore the feeling, but I am not. I am perfectly awake and properly sullen.

We still have some time before we land, and I have not seen my mate since demanding she board the ship. The other hu-nim females have tried to speak with me, but I have been pretending to be much too busy to do so.

Even though B'rook gave me a frown when I avoided her, I did not say a thing. I do not wish to update her about my relationship with An-nana. She will be upset, and I am in no state to spread my foul mood.

Footsteps make my ears twitch, and I smell him before I see him.

I should not be surprised by his presence, but it is still a bit unsettling. I do not know what he wants from me or if he is angry with me. I guess I shall find out.

"Hello, brother Cay-leb," I greet, continuing to watch the navigation system with L'ore. "Do you need something?"

From the corner of my eye, I watch as he takes the third captain's seat. "Just bored," he replies. His voice is even, and his tone does not give away his mood. "Thought we could talk for a bit."

I am wary of this talk, but I will share words with my mate's family. It is clear they care for each other greatly. He is my brother now—my apo . This is important to me.

"So, this is a spaceship, huh? One of the bigger ones, according to Anna, right?"

"The biggest one we brought to Urth," I confirm, giving him a glance and a nod before turning back to the controls and the view of space in front of me.

He makes a surprised sound. "There are bigger ones?"

"War ships," I answer with a nod. "I possess one, Marrec does as well. He is Stee-vee's mate and is already on Aprix."

"Megan filled me in on that," he says thoughtfully. "She said you two saved your planet a while back. You're both warriors?"

"We were," I confirm. "There is no need for warriors now. Our home is at peace."

I do not like to think of the time when we were not. When enemies took over our planet and enslaved our people. Marrec was lucky enough to escape with his family as a child before the takeover. He did not forget about us, growing up and growing an army to come back for us. Like a wise male, he did not pick a fight he could not win.

Instead, he fought bravely for other small planets, freeing them and working his way up. He gained enough favors, warriors, weapons, and currency to return, and then he ensured that something like that would never happen again. I only helped him once he came back, and gave me the ability to do so.

"I can't imagine being in a human war, let alone a galactic one," Cay-leb tells me. "Don't get me wrong, I know how to hunt just like Anna, but I'm not a fan. Conflict is one of my least favorite things."

I do not relate to the notion, but I understand it. Many Aprixians do not share my affinity for hunting and weaponry.

"There is violence that is fun, and there is disaster that is not, brother Cay-leb."

I can see his head dip in a nod even though I do not directly look at him.

"Makes sense," he responds with a hum. "Megan called you a bloodthirsty golden retriever, so I assume that means you're pretty into the hunting for sport thing?"

"What is a golden retriever ?" I ask, mimicking his words. They translate separately but not together.

"A type of dog that people love," he explains, and I frown.

"Meg-ham calls me a puppy?"

Cay-leb chuckles, shaking his head. "People call other people golden retrievers when they like them. It means you're good-natured and loyal. She doesn't actually think you're a dog. It's a compliment."

Well, that is a relief. I should not like to be thought of as a pet.

"I enjoy hunting," I agree now that the confusion is cleared up. "I am a weapons collector. I enjoy the tools more than the task, I think."

"You and Anna have that in common, then," he muses. "She likes the weapons more than the actual hunting, too."

I grunt in agreement. "She says that you do not prefer either."

He shrugs. "Growing up, hunting wasn't an option. It wasn't something done for fun. I hated it, but I had to pick my battles. I'm really more of a builder than a destroyer. I was a contractor before the world went to shit."

"Con-tractor?"

"Construction, like building houses, barns, fencing, fixing roofs and shit."

"A creator," I summarize, smiling softly. "A noble job, brother Cay-leb."

He smiles too, but shakes his head. "Trust me, it wasn't that noble. It paid the bills and kept me from working on the farm for the rest of my life."

"Rebelling from one's family takes guts. You should not belittle your actions."

He eyes me, tilting his head. "Speaking of family, you're calling me your brother even though you're fighting with Anna?"

I stiffen, immediately defensive. "I am not fighting with An-nana. And if I were, she would still be my mate, and therefore, you would still be my brother."

Cay-leb chuckles. "Just like that, huh?"

"It is the way that my people work," I mutter quietly.

I do not understand what Cay-leb wishes to learn from speaking with me, or why he wishes to see me at all. Should he not be furious with me? Demanding I go to my mate and make everything right? As if I should know how to do such a thing.

"Humans aren't like that," he says thoughtfully. "Families break apart all the time. For good and bad reasons."

"Aprixians have lost many of our own," L'ore explains, shocking me. It is not often that he volunteers conversation. "It is very rare that families do not reconcile differences. We have lost many mothers and daughters, some sons and fathers too. It is easier to conquer challenges between loved ones when you are not sure if they will continue to live another day."

I nod in agreement, giving him a grateful look. L'ore does not wish for many friends, but he will always be one of mine.

"Damn, well, when you put it that way," Cay-leb says, and I finally turn to look at him, watching as he shakes his head. "I imagine it's also easier when you all share pretty open and understanding values. A lot of what drives humans apart is hatred and fear."

Clearing his throat, he doesn't expect or wait for a response. "So, that means you're not going to give up on my sister, right? Because I can't really threaten to kick your ass when you're as strong as you are and fucking bulletproof to boot."

It would be an amusing thought—imagining a hu-nim trying to harm me—if I were not so sad and sulky.

"What is to boot ?"

Cay-leb furrows his eyebrows, thinking of his explanation. "It's a human expression. It means like on top of or in addition to ."

"Hm."

"Look," Cay-leb says firmly. "I'm not saying she was in the right. In fact, I'd be just as mad or sad or whatever you are right now if someone I loved tried to pull what she just did. What I'm trying to figure out is if you can get over it. It doesn't have to be today. Hell, it doesn't have to be tomorrow. But if you care about her as much as you say you do, you'll give her a chance to make up for it."

I open my mouth, but he does not allow me to speak.

"Anna is prickly. Always has been, always will be. She was getting better at managing her quick temper, and then the world fucking imploded. She just found out our dad and brother are gone forever, and she just got me back."

"I know?—"

"Big emotions are hard for her."

"I know?—"

"She cares about you. She never would have let you touch her if she didn't. Anna is the most guarded, stubborn person I know. From what I can see, you know that. I'm not trying to preach at you to go to her or to ignore how badly she clearly hurt you, I'm just trying to let you know that she didn't mean it. She was scared."

"C ay-leb ," I finally say harshly enough to cut in. "I know. I know all of these things that you say. I know my mate, and I know that she did not mean to stab me in the chest with her words. She means more to me than the pain she has caused, so you do not need to worry. I will take care of her even if she continues to hurt me. You will both move into my home when we arrive, and I will stay with Terum. It is close enough that I can assure her safety and yours."

"Drak," he says sadly. "That's not what I'm saying. She loves yo?—"

"I must go now," I interrupt, standing from my seat. "I must check in with the others."

Striding from the control room, I move quickly so that he will not attempt to stop me. If An-nana wishes to tell me that she loves me, she will do it on her own. Of course, I will forgive her if she asks me to. I want nothing more than that. But I am worried that she will not.

I am not sure that my soul can handle the crushing disappointment of never holding her in my arms again. And still, I do not truly know that she wishes for the same. I will not know until she says so. I will forever be hers, even in heartbreak.

For now, I must focus on getting her and her brother to safety.

I will find time to nurse my aching soul seed eventually.